(no subject)
i have sooo been living up to the darker sides of my signs lately...
Libra
THE SCALES is the sign of the diplomat and the ditherer
Falling in love comes naturally to Librans, whose reason for living centres upon happy and enduring relationships. A life without love is just not worth contemplating, Libra can not function without someone special, for they long for emotional security. Problems arise when the reality does not match the ideal, and a complete inability to make a binding decision about relationships, (or anything else for that matter).
The bright side
Libra is easy going, charming and pleasant, all relationships are important to Libra, this sign simply can not do without other people, and makes an excellent party host. Libra is a sign that values peace at all costs, and is very fair minded. People like being around Librans, for in the event of a dispute they will seek a compromise. A word of caution on this compromise though, for things may not be what they seem, Librans can if they wish charm the birds from the trees!
Charming, easy going, romantic, diplomatic, idealistic, refined, in love with love.
The dark side
Oh the indecisiveness is famous! Librans either sit on the fence, (attempting to appear pleasing to all parties), or they swing wildly from one side of the argument to the other, (and not necessarily dependant on who they are talking to!)
This is not the most reliable of signs, either in what they should do, or in maintaining any particular view point. They are often accused of being two faced. Beneath that charming exterior it is less well known, and stealthily concealed that they are very self centred, and insist on getting their own way, (whatever that is today).
Indecisive, resentful, frivolous, changeable, flirtatious, easily influenced, highly susceptible to flattery.
Ailments
Eczema, skin diseases, kidney and bladder infections, diabetes, abcesses, lumbago, vein disorders.
Beneficial foods
Strawberries and plums.
You are most compatible with... the names and initials of those whose birthdays i can remember in: (relationships) [crushes]
Aquarius - a marvellous match. (mel) [j, c]
Gemini - sublime. (temple, nuncia, shan) [a, e, a]
Aries - opposites attract.
Scorpio - emotionally rewarding. [m, z, k, d, j]
Taurus - very sensual. [c, m]
Absolutely no chance!
Capricorn - don't bet on this one. [t, m]
Cancer - very hard work. (shannon)
Virgo - discordant. [g. l]
Libra - indecisive, no decisive, whatever! (evangeline... young, i know, but i count it) [s, v, m, l]
Sagittarius - too flighty. [r, d]
Your opposite sign
is Aries
...
and a note on years of the tiger in regards to love:
Your enthusiasm for life spills over into your relationships, and it is not unusual for you to flit from one partnership into another, inspired by each one. You are excited by the possibilities that each relationship presents and are carried along by the first rush of romance, but eventually, when boredom or predictability sets in, you will be off in search of a new partner. Even when romance collapses around you, you may be feeling low for a while, but you will soon regain energy in pursuit of a new partnership.
People with an independent character attract you: although they may be stimulated by your company and admire your energy, they can still manage without you. A relationship with someone who shares your sense of adventure though still pursues their own interests is more likely to succeed. You are not afraid to declare your feelings and are honest with your emotions, but you are also changeable. You need a partner who remains steady and constant, and quietly pursues their own plans.
...
anyhoo... just random tidbits i've been meaning to file away here for future reference...
came across some notes i jotted down when i was visiting shannon in la. which included this one:
"best friends: all past or current crushes..."
which just reflects my personality and some of what has been aired more as of late. probably a majority of you folks on my friends list here i either have or have had a crush on. some major, some light. some of you have known about them. some of you have known about others.
revelations have often led to uncomfortable situations and sometimes have even ended friendships because of conventional boundaries and general creeped outedness.
amy's probably the best example of that. she was my best friend in high school. i had the biggest crush on her. there was one night we came close to hooking up at a party, but nate came bumbling along and sat himself down with us. nothing ever happened again. well, there was our trip, but that's a whole nother story completely. anyhoo, a couple years ago, i told her how i'd felt all those years. how i loved her more than just as a friend. and while this is normal and oft occuring for me, the most natural thing in the world... it wigged her out and we hardly spoke much after that aside from trite polite touching base. i lost touch and haven't talked to her since i moved to tucson. who knows, maybe it's nothing. maybe i'm the one blowing it out of proportion (as i certainly am wont to do). maybe i should just call mom (her mom) again and get her number. again.
when i revealed to sharon i'd had a crush on her and that it pained me to see her hurt by guy after guy after guy and secretly i'd wished she'd turn to me... well, that ended that friendship. it was years before we spoke again, and even then she was kinda creeped out.
there was evelyn at usf who mel and i had a crush on... who we were becoming really good friends with... and i was a dumbass and told her... duh... freak out city. that was the end of that. fuck.
and erin. that was nearly totally fudged. but she eventually saw i was harmless (i hope :p hehe) and crush or not, we got back on track with the friendship. of course, we had other rocks down the road, but that's beside the point :p
and of course, too many love letters and poems to count that i gave to girls in high school and jr high only to be met with the ol' "only friends" speech... at the least... and "leave me the fuck alone you freak!" at the worst.
and i crush regardless of situation. regardless of whether i'm "in a relationship" or not. classmates. neighbors. customers. coworkers. random strangers on the street.
i don't know what the fuck happened with shannon. i've never felt something end inside like that before. and it's not that what i felt wasn't real. it's not that it was a lie or a facade. contemplation and hypothesizing of late aside. there was something there. something grander than ever i'd felt before. i just don't know what. the. fuck. happened. i don't know if it was sudden or eventual. in hindsight, i can see doubts building and doors shutting over time, even from the very beginning. but in the midst of it all, i fought hard against myself. loss was inevitable.
i don't know if i did it on purpose. i don't know if it was circumstance.
maybe i'm trying to explain something that simply has no explanation. shit just happened. i don't have enough fingers to point.
i do know that it seemed something was in the stars. some major fucked up bad relationship juju in the air... in the past month or two, i know several people who've had major relationship problems. one person got handed divorce papers and told to move out. several of us ended relationships (myself, four of you on my friends list, both my bosses daughters, and some others), and several more have had and/or are having major relationship problems with threat of divorce or break up looming in the distance.
some people made it through. i'm glad and happy for you. because it seems for the most part the people who've been having problems are people who you don't want to see having problems. it breaks my heart to hear or read about it, and i'm disappointed in and angry at myself at times for ending up in the pile.
alas and alack
i resent being alluded to as fake. fickle and fleeting for sure... but when i love, i love completely and utterly. apparently, when i leave it's with just the same strength. something i'm unaccustomed to doing. and i'm sorry shannon had to be the first. i'm sorry i ever found this side of myself. but you never know until you've been there... and at least now i can see myself a little more clearly. disappointing, yes.
i've acted in ways i've always hated guys for acting. but i've acted nonetheless because it's just felt needed. granted i went about it in a very crude and fucked up manor, and for that i'm sorry. but it was something i had to do to face myself.
i'm rambling now. it's late and i'm half asleep. not a good state for proper reflection.
put on ten pounds over the holidays. sitting here typing is not the best way to get them off.
it's a good thing my fingernails are short.
ok, bed.
Libra
THE SCALES is the sign of the diplomat and the ditherer
Falling in love comes naturally to Librans, whose reason for living centres upon happy and enduring relationships. A life without love is just not worth contemplating, Libra can not function without someone special, for they long for emotional security. Problems arise when the reality does not match the ideal, and a complete inability to make a binding decision about relationships, (or anything else for that matter).
The bright side
Libra is easy going, charming and pleasant, all relationships are important to Libra, this sign simply can not do without other people, and makes an excellent party host. Libra is a sign that values peace at all costs, and is very fair minded. People like being around Librans, for in the event of a dispute they will seek a compromise. A word of caution on this compromise though, for things may not be what they seem, Librans can if they wish charm the birds from the trees!
Charming, easy going, romantic, diplomatic, idealistic, refined, in love with love.
The dark side
Oh the indecisiveness is famous! Librans either sit on the fence, (attempting to appear pleasing to all parties), or they swing wildly from one side of the argument to the other, (and not necessarily dependant on who they are talking to!)
This is not the most reliable of signs, either in what they should do, or in maintaining any particular view point. They are often accused of being two faced. Beneath that charming exterior it is less well known, and stealthily concealed that they are very self centred, and insist on getting their own way, (whatever that is today).
Indecisive, resentful, frivolous, changeable, flirtatious, easily influenced, highly susceptible to flattery.
Ailments
Eczema, skin diseases, kidney and bladder infections, diabetes, abcesses, lumbago, vein disorders.
Beneficial foods
Strawberries and plums.
You are most compatible with... the names and initials of those whose birthdays i can remember in: (relationships) [crushes]
Aquarius - a marvellous match. (mel) [j, c]
Gemini - sublime. (temple, nuncia, shan) [a, e, a]
Aries - opposites attract.
Scorpio - emotionally rewarding. [m, z, k, d, j]
Taurus - very sensual. [c, m]
Absolutely no chance!
Capricorn - don't bet on this one. [t, m]
Cancer - very hard work. (shannon)
Virgo - discordant. [g. l]
Libra - indecisive, no decisive, whatever! (evangeline... young, i know, but i count it) [s, v, m, l]
Sagittarius - too flighty. [r, d]
Your opposite sign
is Aries
...
and a note on years of the tiger in regards to love:
Your enthusiasm for life spills over into your relationships, and it is not unusual for you to flit from one partnership into another, inspired by each one. You are excited by the possibilities that each relationship presents and are carried along by the first rush of romance, but eventually, when boredom or predictability sets in, you will be off in search of a new partner. Even when romance collapses around you, you may be feeling low for a while, but you will soon regain energy in pursuit of a new partnership.
People with an independent character attract you: although they may be stimulated by your company and admire your energy, they can still manage without you. A relationship with someone who shares your sense of adventure though still pursues their own interests is more likely to succeed. You are not afraid to declare your feelings and are honest with your emotions, but you are also changeable. You need a partner who remains steady and constant, and quietly pursues their own plans.
...
anyhoo... just random tidbits i've been meaning to file away here for future reference...
came across some notes i jotted down when i was visiting shannon in la. which included this one:
"best friends: all past or current crushes..."
which just reflects my personality and some of what has been aired more as of late. probably a majority of you folks on my friends list here i either have or have had a crush on. some major, some light. some of you have known about them. some of you have known about others.
revelations have often led to uncomfortable situations and sometimes have even ended friendships because of conventional boundaries and general creeped outedness.
amy's probably the best example of that. she was my best friend in high school. i had the biggest crush on her. there was one night we came close to hooking up at a party, but nate came bumbling along and sat himself down with us. nothing ever happened again. well, there was our trip, but that's a whole nother story completely. anyhoo, a couple years ago, i told her how i'd felt all those years. how i loved her more than just as a friend. and while this is normal and oft occuring for me, the most natural thing in the world... it wigged her out and we hardly spoke much after that aside from trite polite touching base. i lost touch and haven't talked to her since i moved to tucson. who knows, maybe it's nothing. maybe i'm the one blowing it out of proportion (as i certainly am wont to do). maybe i should just call mom (her mom) again and get her number. again.
when i revealed to sharon i'd had a crush on her and that it pained me to see her hurt by guy after guy after guy and secretly i'd wished she'd turn to me... well, that ended that friendship. it was years before we spoke again, and even then she was kinda creeped out.
there was evelyn at usf who mel and i had a crush on... who we were becoming really good friends with... and i was a dumbass and told her... duh... freak out city. that was the end of that. fuck.
and erin. that was nearly totally fudged. but she eventually saw i was harmless (i hope :p hehe) and crush or not, we got back on track with the friendship. of course, we had other rocks down the road, but that's beside the point :p
and of course, too many love letters and poems to count that i gave to girls in high school and jr high only to be met with the ol' "only friends" speech... at the least... and "leave me the fuck alone you freak!" at the worst.
and i crush regardless of situation. regardless of whether i'm "in a relationship" or not. classmates. neighbors. customers. coworkers. random strangers on the street.
i don't know what the fuck happened with shannon. i've never felt something end inside like that before. and it's not that what i felt wasn't real. it's not that it was a lie or a facade. contemplation and hypothesizing of late aside. there was something there. something grander than ever i'd felt before. i just don't know what. the. fuck. happened. i don't know if it was sudden or eventual. in hindsight, i can see doubts building and doors shutting over time, even from the very beginning. but in the midst of it all, i fought hard against myself. loss was inevitable.
i don't know if i did it on purpose. i don't know if it was circumstance.
maybe i'm trying to explain something that simply has no explanation. shit just happened. i don't have enough fingers to point.
i do know that it seemed something was in the stars. some major fucked up bad relationship juju in the air... in the past month or two, i know several people who've had major relationship problems. one person got handed divorce papers and told to move out. several of us ended relationships (myself, four of you on my friends list, both my bosses daughters, and some others), and several more have had and/or are having major relationship problems with threat of divorce or break up looming in the distance.
some people made it through. i'm glad and happy for you. because it seems for the most part the people who've been having problems are people who you don't want to see having problems. it breaks my heart to hear or read about it, and i'm disappointed in and angry at myself at times for ending up in the pile.
alas and alack
i resent being alluded to as fake. fickle and fleeting for sure... but when i love, i love completely and utterly. apparently, when i leave it's with just the same strength. something i'm unaccustomed to doing. and i'm sorry shannon had to be the first. i'm sorry i ever found this side of myself. but you never know until you've been there... and at least now i can see myself a little more clearly. disappointing, yes.
i've acted in ways i've always hated guys for acting. but i've acted nonetheless because it's just felt needed. granted i went about it in a very crude and fucked up manor, and for that i'm sorry. but it was something i had to do to face myself.
i'm rambling now. it's late and i'm half asleep. not a good state for proper reflection.
put on ten pounds over the holidays. sitting here typing is not the best way to get them off.
it's a good thing my fingernails are short.
ok, bed.