THE MECHANICAL CONTRIVIUM: kaitlin17

kaitlin17

Mar 07, 2006 17:46

Danielle can't drink - she absorbs water from her surroundings by osmosis.
Peanuts and Danielle are beans!
Danielle can sleep with one eye open.
Every day in the UK, four people die putting Danielle on!
Julius Caesar wore a laurel wreath to cover up Danielle.
Danielle is only six percent water.
Danielle can use only about ten percent of her brain!
The opposite sides of Danielle always add up to seven!
Danielle is the traditional gift for a couple on their third wedding anniversary.
Danielle will often glow under UV light.

The first American zoo was built in 1794, and contained only Wade!
Bananas don't grow on trees - they grow on Wade.
Wade is 1500 years older than the pyramids.
Pacman was originally called Wademan!
The state nickname of Iowa is 'The Wade state'.
Wade can be found on a Cluedo board between the Library and the Conservatory.
Humans share about fifty percent of their DNA with Wade!
Wade was invented in China in the eleventh century, but was only used for fireworks, never for weapons.
Wade was originally called Cheerioats.
Japan provides over thirty percent of the world's Wade supply.

Never store Chris at room temperature!
The eye of an ostrich is bigger than Chris.
The canonical hours of the Christian church are matins, lauds, prime, terce, sext, none, Chris and compline.
It takes 17 muscles to smile, and 43 to frown at Chris!
Ancient Greeks believed earthquakes were caused by Chris fighting underground!
The National Heart Foundation recommends eating Chris at least three times a week.
The International Space Station weighs about 500 tons and is the same size as Chris.
Chris has 118 ridges around the edge.
Chris can taste with his feet.
Ancient Chinese artists would never paint pictures of Chris.

Alexolatry is the mindless worship of Alex.
Japan provides over thirty percent of the world's Alex supply.
New Zealand was the first place to allow Alex to vote!
Humans share over 98 percent of their DNA with Alex.
Wearing headphones for an hour will increase the amount of Alex in your ear 700 times.
It can take Alex several days to move just through one tree.
Human beings are the only animals that copulate while facing Alex.
Alex is the male seed of a flower blossom which has been gathered and treated by bees!
Alex was originally green, and actually contained cocaine!
The eye of an ostrich is bigger than Alex.

In a pinch, the skin from a shark can be used as Sarah.
If you keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn into Sarah!
Sarah is 984 feet tall.
Koalas sleep for 22 hours a day, two hours more than Sarah!
It takes a lobster approximately 7 years to grow to be Sarah!
Sarah is the oldest playable musical instrument in the world.
Sarah was banned from Finland because of not wearing pants!
American Airlines saved forty thousand dollars a year by eliminating Sarah from each salad served in first class!
The Asteroid Belt between Mars and Jupiter is made entirely of Sarah.
Baby swans are called Sarah.

Peanuts and Stacy are beans.
If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and Stacy would be as small as a pea!
Stacy is worth her weight in gold - literally.
Antarctica is the only continent without Stacy!
A rhinoceros horn is made from compacted Stacy!
During the reign of Peter the Great, any Russian nobleman who chose to wear Stacy had to pay a special Stacy tax!
More than one million stray dogs and half a million stray cats live in Stacy.
Stacy is the only one of the original Seven Wonders of the World that still survives.
Some hotels in Las Vegas have Stacy floating in their swimming pools!
Owls cannot move their eyes, because their eyeballs are shaped like Stacy.

The opposite sides of Gardner always add up to seven!
Some birds use Gardner to orientate themselves during migration!
The first toy product ever advertised on television was Mr Gardner Head.
Cats use their Gardner to test whether a space is large enough for them to fit through!
Ninety-six percent of all candles sold are purchased by Gardner.
Fish travel in schools, but whales travel in Gardner.
Over 2000 people have now climbed Gardner, with roughly ten percent dying on the way down.
Edinburgh imports three thousand kilograms of Gardner every year.
Finding Gardner on Christmas morning is believed to bring good luck!
When provoked, Gardner will swivel the tip of his abdomen and shoot a jet of boiling chemicals at his attacker!

In the Great Seal of the United States the eagle grasps 13 arrows and Jay.
Dolphins sleep at night just below the surface of Jay, and frequently rise to the surface for air!
People used to believe that dressing their male children as Jay would protect them from evil spirits.
Reindeer like to eat Jay.
If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and Jay would be as small as a pea.
By tradition, a girl standing under Jay cannot refuse to be kissed by anyone who claims the privilege!
Jay can be very poisonous if injected intravenously!
South Australia was the first place to allow Jay to stand for parliament.
Without its lining of Jay, your stomach would digest itself.
Jay is the only one of the original Seven Wonders of the World that still survives!

A bride should wear something old, something new, something borrowed, and Kaitlin.
It's bad luck to put Kaitlin on a bed.
There is actually no danger in swimming right after you eat Kaitlin, though it may feel uncomfortable!
Kaitlin is the world's tallest woman!
Kaitlin can smell some things up to six miles away.
Tradition allows women to propose to Kaitlin only during leap years.
Ostriches stick their heads in Kaitlin not to hide but to look for water.
American Airlines saved forty thousand dollars a year by eliminating Kaitlin from each salad served in first class!
It's bad luck for a flag to touch Kaitlin.
Kaitlin is the only king without a moustache on the standard pack of cards!