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[kalomari]

Man this seriously sucks imagine not being able to spend Valentines Day with the person you love let alone any other day of the year. I know I complain a lot but how can I seriously hold something like this inside I mean I talked to Diane the other day and realized that if you love someone so much you really can't just pretend somethings not

Comments

Don't be mad.....

[kalomari]

Please don't be mad at me Clairissa I only do what I feel is right, everyone knows how I am and they know that every action I ever take in my life is based upon the decision of my heart. I wouldn't have contacted you unless I felt the dior need to I don't know what's going on right now everything is a bit of a blur. I do know one thing though and it is that I can't ignore my feelings for you not now and not for an entire year unless you give me a reason to, tell me Clairissa why should we have to hide behind our feelings for each other? Are we hiding from each other or your father? Tell me please if you can give me just one good reason why we should be apart from each other for an entire year then I will back off and be at ease. My mind is running races and one of the races is how to get to you and well Kitten it looks like so far I'm losing so you tell me what I should do because I've run out of ideas. This is a race that I don't want to lose in fact metaphorically speaking I want the gold but so far I'm stuck in the bleachers, I don

I just don't know...

[kalomari]

I'm always so strong I always try to be the strongest for my friends and my family, I just don't know if I can be strong for myself it's so painfull I feel like I'm falling and there's never anyone to catch me. Clairissa would catch me if only she could I'm trying to hold it together and use my film making, school and working as a media Director for church to keep me busy. I miss her so much and I would give anything and everything for this all to be over in a good way. I trust God but am I being tested or what I just don't know, I don't think I can handle all of this I'm a man of action if something like this were to usually happen I would take care of it. I'm trying God knows I am even my family and friends know everyone has seen progress in me and that's including myself. It's just well the moment I was told I couldn't see Clairissa for a year I was like okay it shouldn't be to hard. Although soon later I realized that I had lost a spark in my life one that was much greater than all the others, I don't want to be away from her it