(no subject)
Sometimes it just gets too much for me. I just want things to stop. I worry that this is more than just stress...its been slowly building up eversince I've come back home but I feel the depression returning. I think this environment is really bad for my mental and emotional health...I have thought about getting professional help before but am afraid they will just say I'm just over-reacting and stressing over nothing....
But I don't know...sometimes I am happy but then one things happens that sets me off, like a domino effect...and then I feel like nothing will get better...
There's so much stuff I thought/want to do in the future but I am feeling so shit right now and my self-esteem and confidence is so low I've lost hope that those things will even be achievable...
And surely its not normal to think about death and dying as much as I do...it doesn't scare me so much as the thought of guilt and regret for what that could do to my family...
I feel like I'm being suffocated and just want to give up. Just lie in bed and sleep until the my life gets better...
EDIT: I just went to 'Beyond Blue' which provides information about depression and mental illness and it notes that if my symtoms last longer than 2 weeks I should seek help...I'll wait till after Christmas to see how I feel
But I don't know...sometimes I am happy but then one things happens that sets me off, like a domino effect...and then I feel like nothing will get better...
There's so much stuff I thought/want to do in the future but I am feeling so shit right now and my self-esteem and confidence is so low I've lost hope that those things will even be achievable...
And surely its not normal to think about death and dying as much as I do...it doesn't scare me so much as the thought of guilt and regret for what that could do to my family...
I feel like I'm being suffocated and just want to give up. Just lie in bed and sleep until the my life gets better...
EDIT: I just went to 'Beyond Blue' which provides information about depression and mental illness and it notes that if my symtoms last longer than 2 weeks I should seek help...I'll wait till after Christmas to see how I feel