Fic: Old Wounds

[kappamaki33]

Title: Old Wounds
Author: kappamaki33
Characters/Pairings: Gaeta, Hoshi, Narcho; Gaeta/Hoshi/Narcho (established relationship)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: One bullet, three lives: how Felix being shot while on the Demetrius affected the relationship of Felix Gaeta, Louis Hoshi, and Noel Allison.
Notes: For my long, long overdue Never Will I Ever meme, for lls_mutant’s

Comments

[lls_mutant]

You have no idea how badly I needed something good to happen today, and two stories from you really helped. Thank you. This is so sad and poignant and bittersweet. Interesting, too, to see where their insecurities are and how they each consider themselves the least important part of the triad. (Well, Felix and Louis do. Noel just knows they don't work without all three of them.) They all make me ache a bit, because this part of canon is so dark and hard and they do realize just how lucky they are, and you can tell the polygamy thing is harder than they're letting themselves believe.

Very nice!

(Oh, and PS- you've got a dropped tag in there!)

[kappamaki33]

Thanks! Polyamory is something I have a hard time wrapping my head around--not the idea that some people would like it, just the practicalities and emotional dynamics of it. I guess my touchstone for this fic was, it's hard enough to make a relationship with one other person work; two, I would think, would be more than twice as hard in a lot of ways. And I think even though he keeps his insecurities a bit quieter than Louis and Felix do, Noel would agree, too--especially when he looks back at Felix and Louis as he's leaving and doesn't really see anything missing. ::hugs all three::

Fixed the italics--thanks for the heads-up!

(Hope today was better!)

[kappamaki33]

Thanks so much! I really don't know much about polyamory, and it's not something my brain naturally traces out the consequences of well, so I'm glad this came through as believable. That fear of being the weakest link was what I latched onto as my only way in to this story (it was a good "never will I ever" prompt in that respect, that's for sure).

[lorrainemarker]

I've always loved the idea of Gaeta/Hoshi/Narcho and really like how you blended their personalties in this story. Each of them have such similar fears, while so clearly needing both of the other men. It was interesting and very real to life that all three recognized that he needed both the other men, but none of them seemed to realize how much both of the others needed him. So very human.

I really wish there had been someone in medical to override Felix's decision about using local anesthetic, because shocky and fevered is not the time to make that call. I'm glad Noel did (even if Felix is pissed right now), that's not a memory he needed. Also, at least Anders got a couple of black eyes. Thanks for a wonderful story.

[kappamaki33]

Thanks! Threesome-writing definitely doesn't come naturally to me, but exploring the fears and weaknesses (and even a little bit the strengths) of these three together was very interesting.

Ah yes, my favorite side-effect of having Narcho on the Raptor with Felix (and presumably following him down to the infirmary) was that there was no way in hell he'd let Felix go through with the no anesthesia plan.

[trovia]

This is such a lovely fic that reminded me of the perks of the threesome fics (but also of why I'm always slightly suspicious of them, in a too-good-to-be-true way) - having two people worry about you instead just one. I wonder if that's some sort of wish fulfillment psychologically. But! That's no commentary on your fic, just my rambling thoughts.

A detail that struck me as really interesting was that you had Louis be the one who thought of himself as "not quite a soldier" and "not the hero" despite the fact that he was involved on quite some heavy duty stuff on the Pegasus. Another one was the idea of Narcho having been in a work camp on NC. Now that's a really curious idea that I might have to keep in the back of my mind.

[kappamaki33]

Glad you enjoyed it! I have to admit, personally, I don't find threesome stories as wish fulfillment, because I can't get around the idea that they'd be really, really hard work. But your comment did get me thinking. Maybe there's even some throwback to remembering being comforted by two parents? I don't know much at all about this area, but interesting to think about.

I would love to see someone write about Cylon-run work camps on New Caprica. They had to have existed. I remember back in the Season 3 webisodes, the Doral had that weird scene with Jammer where he showed him juice made at a farm through the joint labor of Cylons and humans (or so he said). At the time, I sort of giggled at it being, "Come to the dark side; we have juice and cookies," but in retrospect, it begs a lot of questions. I highly doubt there were humans lining up to tend the Cylons' fruit trees voluntarily.

[trovia]

Well, having been in a polyamorous relationship (though not a "real" threesome, as I was just dating a woman who was with another person), I think you're right on in regards to the hard work. But here in this particular situation? It was striking to see Gaeta, who we so often let suffer in sickbay all alone, in the company by not just one, but two worried boyfriends. And it strikes me as a trope I've seen around before in fanfic (say, in Gaeta/Agathons triangles). It's a really interesting thought about the parental connection though!

That said, I liked a lot how you had Narcho be really blasé about the idea of this relationship, it being a Gemenese thing. I can't picture polyamory as common in the Colonies, since we never see it on the show (and since the jealousy issues are played up so much in some of the canon pairings), but it works if you point it out as a thing that's special about one Colony. It creates a nice sense of cultural diversity.

"Come to the dark side; we have juice and cookies,"Hee