I've long thought about doing this, and so, having rediscovered the thought bank that is Livejournal, here do I present to you, the avid (and possibly imaginary) reader, a soliloquy from Shakespeare's seminal work Hamlet, that I have painstakingly translated into Redneck ( Read more... )

Hmmmm.....it seems that I used to deposit my thoughts here. It's been 102 weeks since I last wrote anything for this. That's 714 days, or 17136 hours, or 1028160 minutes. I only stumbled across it looking for something else. That lends a certain surreal element to my posting again. It's as if my brain were some sort of mnemovorical hermit crab that ( Read more... )

I Do Hereby and Herewith Make Public My Declaration of Intentions For the Thanksgiving Holiday ( Read more... )

For those of you who don't understand my topic line, watch "Lucky Number Slevin". It is, in my magnificent opinion, the shit. I highly recommend it ( Read more... )

....Granting Gifts of Liquor and Flaming Marshmallows ( Read more... )

I have been to Oldham County, KY 3 times in the last 8 days. Here's what I did ( Read more... )

I have finally found a wonderful equilibrium to my sleeping schedule. I sleep for about 16 hours all at once, and then I'm awake for 2 days. It evens out to eight hours a day. I'm told this is a healthy amount. It reminds me of one of my favorite axioms: Ave Verum Corpus. This means: Turn Away From the Truth of the Body. Which put another way is: ( Read more... )

...but we doubt their sincerity ( Read more... )

I now have a place that I loathe more than New Jersey. The barren wastelands of Ohio! I've spent the past two days escorting my sister around the nightmare that is Cleveland (college visit at Case Western University). The whole landscape seemed grayed out, like a flashback, or maybe eye cancer. The automata..sorry...the "people" that "live" there ( Read more... )

Both me and Nate are sick. It sucks with almost the force of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking me in the face. Also, am out of cigarettes, and have no car for at least another hour. Am getting edgy, and paranoid. But as they say, a paranoid is just someone in possession of all the facts. Beginning to hallucinate. The walls are closing in.........I ( Read more... )