Complications: Why Aren't You Grieving?
Why Aren’t You Grieving?
Gavin leaned against the wall, grinning as he watched his children swarm around the newest member of their family. Little Tobian slumbered, secure in big brother Keenan's arms, while Cayleen hung over his shoulder, staring at the baby in abject fascination.
"You want more, we're adopting again." Sera, despite her tart words, was smiling tenderly, curled up against the head of the bed. At Gavin's light chuckle, she scowled at him. "You think I'm kidding? Nuh-uh. We get the next one the same way we got Rayfe and Kee."
Gavin laughed, moving to sit with his wife. "You mean I pick them, and you'll make sure I get them?" He pressed a kiss to her temple.
"Gee thanks, Dad. Way to make us sound like grocery deliveries." A tall young man was easing through the door with a large tray. "It's not like we're your beloved sons, or anything."
"You'll be my most beloved if that's my lunch," Sera offered with a bright smile.
"Really? Lunch outweighs the glory of your newborn?" Keenan's expression echoed the sardonic one on his brother's face. He shifted, easing his small bundle higher against his shoulder.
"Sweetie, my newborn is WHY lunch is all important to me right now. I just had a baby; do you know how many calories that burns?"
Rayfe settled the tray in front of his parents. "We don't need to know. Just recharge, Mother." He straightened and his face fell into more serious lines. "Dad, I saw General Antilles."
Gavin dropped the bread he'd filched from his wife back onto the plate. Throughout Sera's long overnight labour, he'd kept flashing back to the utter devastation upon Wedge's face; and when Tobian had come squalling into the galaxy, he'd felt an inexpressible sorrow at the thought of the Antilles', in the same ward, but with only loss and pain as their companions. "How is he?"
Rayfe shrugged one shoulder. "He seemed... drained, but kind of relieved, too. He said he and Iella would come visit us."
Sera's eyes went wide. "So she must have come through the surgery well. But oh... Gavin, their baby..."
He closed his eyes in pain. "I know. I don't what this will be like for them." He ran a gentle hand over his son's downy hair, trying to imagine what it would have been like to lose him before he'd ever truly met him. "But if this is what they need, I can't say no."
Rayfe leaned against his father, eyes soft on his siblings. At seventeen, he was almost as tall as Gavin, broad shouldered and strong. "It seems wrong that we're so happy, when your friends can't be."
Gavin's response was cut off by a quick rap at the door, followed by Wedge easing his head inside. "Is the Darklighter Clan available for visitors?"
Sera pulled herself upright. "Wedge Antilles, get your butt in here now!"
The general's eyes crinkled with his grin. "Just my butt? My wife may object." He guided a hover chair bearing Iella into the room, both looking surprisingly content after what they'd been through.
"It's your wife I want to see, mister!" Sera retorted. "I figured if I mentioned your butt, she'd appear real fast to defend her territory."
Iella laughed tiredly. "That's right - his butt is none of your business!"
"Correction," Keenan drawled. "His butt is none of our business."
Gavin chuckled, shaking his head at his wife. "Agreed. His face, however, is fair game." He gestured towards his friend. It hadn't really registered yesterday, what with everything that had been going on, but now... "What the hell happened to your eye?"
Wedge blushed, the flush of red offsetting the purple bruise flourishing on his right cheek and across his nose. "I, ah, may have been slightly less than diplomatic."
He glanced down at his wife, shamefaced. "And by slightly, I mean grossly out of line."
Iella looked just as embarrassed. "Forget it, Wedge. Neither of us was exactly rational." She turned to Keenan and Cayleen. "Hey guys. Can I meet the new baby?"
Seeing the uncertainty flood his son's expression, Gavin stepped in. Easing the baby from Keenan’s arms and into Iella’s, he smiled, hoping that this really was the right thing to do. “May I introduce Tobian Darklighter, our newest son?”
“Hello there, little one. I’m very pleased to meet you.” The baby yawned, tuning his face into her chest and nuzzling. Iella’s face lit up with a tender smile. “You’re out of luck there, sweetie.” She ghosted a hand gently over his head, ruffling the dark wisps of hair. “Wedge, I’ve changed my mind.” Gavin saw her lips tremble, and thought for sure that she was about to burst into tears.
Wedge chuckled. “What about this time?”
Gavin and Sera exchanged startled looks; the general showed no concern of an impending breakdown. The boys were staring as well, and even Cayleen looked confused.
Iella looked up at her husband with a tired grin. “I want a boy after all.”
Wedge actually laughed. “A-wing. We’ll just have to wait and see, won’t we?”
“You’re not sad!” Rayfe burst out, startling everyone in the room. Tobian grizzled, but his brother seemed too perturbed to care. “You’re tired, drained, sore, but neither of you are grieving.” He pushed his long dark hair out of his eyes. “Why aren’t you grieving?”
Gavin thought perhaps he should reprimand his son for speaking in such a manner… but he was far too curious himself. Both of them should be devastated… but they’re not.
The general was smiling, and Iella reached out to touch Rayfe’s cheek. “Because, dear boy, we have been given a miracle.” She turned her gaze to Gavin, tears shining in her eyes. “Our baby’s alive after all. Alive.”
Silence reigned for a moment. Then…
“Thank the Force!” Rayfe, voice choked with emotion, wrapped his arms around Iella, drawing her and his brother into a tight hug. “It just didn’t seem fair. It wasn’t right.”
Gavin, his own relief beyond his ability to put into words, only reached out to shake Wedge’s hand firmly, pulling the general over by the bedside. Sera leaned out, bestowing a quick happy kiss on the man’s cheek, careful not to bump his black eye.
Rayfe finally pulled back from Iella, wiping his eyes, and then, with a low chuckle, wiped hers as well. “This is wonderful. Perfect. Can we hit whoever got it wrong?”
“Oh no, please don’t!” Iella laughed. “Dr Banefre is wonderful, and it really wasn’t her fault.”
“And don’t even consider going near Melli.” Wedge flicked the back of the boy’s head. “Without her…” He swallowed heavily. “She’s the one who figured it out. Before it was too late.”
“It wasn’t their fault,” Iella added softly. She handed Tobian up to Wedge, who cuddled the baby close; a substitute, Gavin knew, for the time when he’d be able to hold his own child. “The circumstances - in any other case, they’d have been right. It was just a complete fluke that our baby was alive in there. Totally astronomical odds.”
Gavin smiled. “And here I thought Corellians didn’t care about the odds. Didn’t respect them.”
“Oh, we care. And in this case-” Wedge’s eyes were leaking, his heart in his voice. “-in this case, I respect those odds so much. Because… she beat them. She beat them and she’s still with us.”
Gavin and Sera exchanged glances, settling in on the bed. Cayleen curled up on her father’s lap, and Rayfe and Keenan claimed the foot of the bed. “Why don’t you tell us all about it? I have a feeling it’s a story more than worthy of a Rogue.”
Gavin leaned against the wall, grinning as he watched his children swarm around the newest member of their family. Little Tobian slumbered, secure in big brother Keenan's arms, while Cayleen hung over his shoulder, staring at the baby in abject fascination.
"You want more, we're adopting again." Sera, despite her tart words, was smiling tenderly, curled up against the head of the bed. At Gavin's light chuckle, she scowled at him. "You think I'm kidding? Nuh-uh. We get the next one the same way we got Rayfe and Kee."
Gavin laughed, moving to sit with his wife. "You mean I pick them, and you'll make sure I get them?" He pressed a kiss to her temple.
"Gee thanks, Dad. Way to make us sound like grocery deliveries." A tall young man was easing through the door with a large tray. "It's not like we're your beloved sons, or anything."
"You'll be my most beloved if that's my lunch," Sera offered with a bright smile.
"Really? Lunch outweighs the glory of your newborn?" Keenan's expression echoed the sardonic one on his brother's face. He shifted, easing his small bundle higher against his shoulder.
"Sweetie, my newborn is WHY lunch is all important to me right now. I just had a baby; do you know how many calories that burns?"
Rayfe settled the tray in front of his parents. "We don't need to know. Just recharge, Mother." He straightened and his face fell into more serious lines. "Dad, I saw General Antilles."
Gavin dropped the bread he'd filched from his wife back onto the plate. Throughout Sera's long overnight labour, he'd kept flashing back to the utter devastation upon Wedge's face; and when Tobian had come squalling into the galaxy, he'd felt an inexpressible sorrow at the thought of the Antilles', in the same ward, but with only loss and pain as their companions. "How is he?"
Rayfe shrugged one shoulder. "He seemed... drained, but kind of relieved, too. He said he and Iella would come visit us."
Sera's eyes went wide. "So she must have come through the surgery well. But oh... Gavin, their baby..."
He closed his eyes in pain. "I know. I don't what this will be like for them." He ran a gentle hand over his son's downy hair, trying to imagine what it would have been like to lose him before he'd ever truly met him. "But if this is what they need, I can't say no."
Rayfe leaned against his father, eyes soft on his siblings. At seventeen, he was almost as tall as Gavin, broad shouldered and strong. "It seems wrong that we're so happy, when your friends can't be."
Gavin's response was cut off by a quick rap at the door, followed by Wedge easing his head inside. "Is the Darklighter Clan available for visitors?"
Sera pulled herself upright. "Wedge Antilles, get your butt in here now!"
The general's eyes crinkled with his grin. "Just my butt? My wife may object." He guided a hover chair bearing Iella into the room, both looking surprisingly content after what they'd been through.
"It's your wife I want to see, mister!" Sera retorted. "I figured if I mentioned your butt, she'd appear real fast to defend her territory."
Iella laughed tiredly. "That's right - his butt is none of your business!"
"Correction," Keenan drawled. "His butt is none of our business."
Gavin chuckled, shaking his head at his wife. "Agreed. His face, however, is fair game." He gestured towards his friend. It hadn't really registered yesterday, what with everything that had been going on, but now... "What the hell happened to your eye?"
Wedge blushed, the flush of red offsetting the purple bruise flourishing on his right cheek and across his nose. "I, ah, may have been slightly less than diplomatic."
He glanced down at his wife, shamefaced. "And by slightly, I mean grossly out of line."
Iella looked just as embarrassed. "Forget it, Wedge. Neither of us was exactly rational." She turned to Keenan and Cayleen. "Hey guys. Can I meet the new baby?"
Seeing the uncertainty flood his son's expression, Gavin stepped in. Easing the baby from Keenan’s arms and into Iella’s, he smiled, hoping that this really was the right thing to do. “May I introduce Tobian Darklighter, our newest son?”
“Hello there, little one. I’m very pleased to meet you.” The baby yawned, tuning his face into her chest and nuzzling. Iella’s face lit up with a tender smile. “You’re out of luck there, sweetie.” She ghosted a hand gently over his head, ruffling the dark wisps of hair. “Wedge, I’ve changed my mind.” Gavin saw her lips tremble, and thought for sure that she was about to burst into tears.
Wedge chuckled. “What about this time?”
Gavin and Sera exchanged startled looks; the general showed no concern of an impending breakdown. The boys were staring as well, and even Cayleen looked confused.
Iella looked up at her husband with a tired grin. “I want a boy after all.”
Wedge actually laughed. “A-wing. We’ll just have to wait and see, won’t we?”
“You’re not sad!” Rayfe burst out, startling everyone in the room. Tobian grizzled, but his brother seemed too perturbed to care. “You’re tired, drained, sore, but neither of you are grieving.” He pushed his long dark hair out of his eyes. “Why aren’t you grieving?”
Gavin thought perhaps he should reprimand his son for speaking in such a manner… but he was far too curious himself. Both of them should be devastated… but they’re not.
The general was smiling, and Iella reached out to touch Rayfe’s cheek. “Because, dear boy, we have been given a miracle.” She turned her gaze to Gavin, tears shining in her eyes. “Our baby’s alive after all. Alive.”
Silence reigned for a moment. Then…
“Thank the Force!” Rayfe, voice choked with emotion, wrapped his arms around Iella, drawing her and his brother into a tight hug. “It just didn’t seem fair. It wasn’t right.”
Gavin, his own relief beyond his ability to put into words, only reached out to shake Wedge’s hand firmly, pulling the general over by the bedside. Sera leaned out, bestowing a quick happy kiss on the man’s cheek, careful not to bump his black eye.
Rayfe finally pulled back from Iella, wiping his eyes, and then, with a low chuckle, wiped hers as well. “This is wonderful. Perfect. Can we hit whoever got it wrong?”
“Oh no, please don’t!” Iella laughed. “Dr Banefre is wonderful, and it really wasn’t her fault.”
“And don’t even consider going near Melli.” Wedge flicked the back of the boy’s head. “Without her…” He swallowed heavily. “She’s the one who figured it out. Before it was too late.”
“It wasn’t their fault,” Iella added softly. She handed Tobian up to Wedge, who cuddled the baby close; a substitute, Gavin knew, for the time when he’d be able to hold his own child. “The circumstances - in any other case, they’d have been right. It was just a complete fluke that our baby was alive in there. Totally astronomical odds.”
Gavin smiled. “And here I thought Corellians didn’t care about the odds. Didn’t respect them.”
“Oh, we care. And in this case-” Wedge’s eyes were leaking, his heart in his voice. “-in this case, I respect those odds so much. Because… she beat them. She beat them and she’s still with us.”
Gavin and Sera exchanged glances, settling in on the bed. Cayleen curled up on her father’s lap, and Rayfe and Keenan claimed the foot of the bed. “Why don’t you tell us all about it? I have a feeling it’s a story more than worthy of a Rogue.”