and then I cried
For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God ~ Romans 3:23
Diabetes. That's what the doctor wanted to see me about.That's what the results show. It runs in my family and I knew I would get it with my crappy eating habits. My dad told him I was worried/scared so he told my dad the results and said I need to show up Wed. to discuss the 'game plan' now. He put a rush on the ultrasound. Again I'm not suprised. I have PCOS but I'm still shocked. I thought I had time to change. Truth is you don't. I don't have a choice now I must change the negative aspects of my life. It's a humbling thing to admit your faults and that yes my parents lack of disipline as a child and teenager contributed to my behaviors but it was up to me and me alone to stop the cycle and I didn't. I blamed everyone but me for things wrong in my life. The hardest thing for me is to admit I'm wrong. Even harder will be the journey. Today I was humbled. I'll give myself today to be depressed and disappointed in myself,like I always do when an obstacle/tragedy happens, then tomorrow I'll pick myself up and meet this head on,like I always do.
I also cried last night and today. I have not been able to cry in awhile. I got sick afterwards but it was so good to cry a bit. I felt human.
Diabetes. That's what the doctor wanted to see me about.That's what the results show. It runs in my family and I knew I would get it with my crappy eating habits. My dad told him I was worried/scared so he told my dad the results and said I need to show up Wed. to discuss the 'game plan' now. He put a rush on the ultrasound. Again I'm not suprised. I have PCOS but I'm still shocked. I thought I had time to change. Truth is you don't. I don't have a choice now I must change the negative aspects of my life. It's a humbling thing to admit your faults and that yes my parents lack of disipline as a child and teenager contributed to my behaviors but it was up to me and me alone to stop the cycle and I didn't. I blamed everyone but me for things wrong in my life. The hardest thing for me is to admit I'm wrong. Even harder will be the journey. Today I was humbled. I'll give myself today to be depressed and disappointed in myself,like I always do when an obstacle/tragedy happens, then tomorrow I'll pick myself up and meet this head on,like I always do.
I also cried last night and today. I have not been able to cry in awhile. I got sick afterwards but it was so good to cry a bit. I felt human.