Remembering Stu Shiffman

[kate_schaefer]

I can't remember meeeting Stu, but it must have happened at the 1976 worldcon in Kansas City. By the 1977 world in Miami Beach, I knew Stu and had a minor crush on him, which he ignored. Stu always sucked at flirtation, but he was fabulous at friendship

Comments

[don_fitch]

Yup, a fine tribute.

I hate to say this, but ... I'm glad that Stu died. After the first stroke, he wasn't able to do Art, or to put words together well. I don't think he would have wanted to live that way. If the Universe were fair, and there was a God which was Just, things like this wouldn't happen.

[kate_schaefer]

Don, I understand that sentiment, and I know the relief of Stu not suffering any more. On the other hand, I saw him during the last two years (not as often as I would have liked), and I know that he wanted to live. He was making progress until the fall -- not steady progress, but progress. He did still derive pleasure from life, and he was very much the same Stu in personality and determination.

I did not see him after the fall; from what Andi said during that period, recovering from that fall would have been a different story.

[ext_1726775]

We didn't know if Stu would recover this time and yes, it was possible he would be facing new hard stuff. All I ever wanted was for him to come back enough that he could communicate with me. I knew him for 27 years and I saw what he did to recover. I DO think he would have tried again, knowing what was still there for him.
Don's incorrect in terms of words - he put words together very well. He had some initial aphasia but it was actually easing up and he was having what seemed to us like the Usual 60 year old word loss. He also was finding words when I couldn't remember which was a huge source of giggles for us. I know there were things he would not have been able to cope with - I think I know - but he did want to live. He fought for 2 1/2 years to come back. We didn't get married because he was dying or giving up, but because we were looking forward to so much more time together. He was still an artist, even if he didn't draw again, he was an artist. We were happy.

[anonymous]

Thank you for writing this.

-- Michael Walsh, of the East Coast