Fanfiction Masterlist
2006-2015
Almost all links go to livejournal or the AO3, but some stuff was only ever posted on FF.net or Teaspoon.
kathkin on the AO3!
Anything marked with a * is not worth reading and is only here for consistency.
( Merlin)
Adventures of Sinbad
Title: Ineffable
Rating: G
Pairing: Maeve/Sinbad
Summary: Sinbad and Maeve get separated from the rest of the crew, share a moment, and learn something new about each other. Were it anyone other than Sinbad it might even have been romantic. Early S1, UST.
Title: Trust
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Maeve/Sinbad
Summary: You know what your problem is? You just don’t trust me!” Maeve demands Sinbad prove he trusts her, a.k.a the one where Sinbad discovers his suppressed sub kink and Maeve is secretly an epic domme.
Doctor Who
Title: No Such Thing As Ghosts
Rating: G
Characters: Donna Noble, Adric
Summary: When Donna Noble was eight and a half, she went through a rather odd phase but she persuaded herself that she'd just been dreaming. Because there wasn't any such thing as ghosts. The Doctor had told her that, and he would know.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Someone Special
Rating: G
Pairing: Nyssa/Adric, Five/Tegan
Summary: Nyssa and Adric are acting rather strangely. Tegan is suspicious. The Doctor won't believe her.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Parts - One/Two/Three
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Adric, Nyssa, Tegan
Summary: Musings on Adric's death
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: His
Rating: PG
Pairing: Five/Tegan
Summary: It was something about this regeneration. He was seeing people differently.
Title: Happy Birthday
Rating: G
Characters: Ten, Rose
Summary: Rose wants to go to Barcelona, but the Doctor has other plans
Title: Giant Locusts
Rating: G
Characters: Four, Adric
Summary: The Fourth Doctor and Adric sample a local delicacy.
Title: Closed Doors
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Five, Adric, Nyssa
Summary: Adric wakes up and something is very wrong.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Bad Dream
Rating: PG
Characters: Five, Nyssa
Summary: Nyssa has had a nightmare.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Things Beyond Comprehension
Rating: PG
Characters: Two, Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~5400
Summary: It was one of the first lessons Jamie had ever learned: if you wanted to get the measure of a man, you looked at his dæmon. And if you couldn’t see a man’s dæmon? Well, you couldn’t trust him at all. An AU in which humans have dæmons and Time Lords don't. His Dark Materials fusion.
Warnings: Some violence.
Title: Numb
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Two, Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~8300
Summary: Jamie wasn’t afraid of dying - but if there was one thing travelling with the Doctor had taught him, it was that there were worse things. In which Jamie is captured by the cybermen and partially cyber-converted.
Warnings: Violence, body horror.
Title: Happy Accidents
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~8600
Summary: Don’t touch the plants, Jamie! Sex pollen leads to an impromptu biology lesson, which leads to further sex.
Warnings: Dubious consent
Title: Circles
Rating: G
Characters: Two+Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~2700
Summary: It was one of humanity's stranger quirks, these soul-marks. Words on their skin, names of people they haven't met yet. Jamie McCrimmon never knew what to make of his, until he met the Doctor.
Title: First Snow
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~2300
Summary: There's lights in the sky and strange noises in the woods. But who cares about that when it's snowing! Or, Zoe has never seen snow before, and Jamie introduces her to the joy and fun of snowball fights.
Title: Jumpsuits and Crinolines
Rating: G
Pairing: Zoe/Victoria
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: “I don’t dare,” said Zoe. “If I move I’ll fall over. I’ll get stuck on my back like a tortoise.” Victoria and Zoe trade outfits. The Doctor can't tell them apart.
Title: Wee Hairy Beastie
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~1500
Summary: Jamie and Zoe are exploring an abandoned house when they come across a terrifying hairy beastie! Did I say hairy beastie? I meant spider. They come across a spider. In which Zoe exploits Jamie's sense of chivalry, Jamie is scared of spiders, and the Doctor is very enthusiastic about the local flora.
Title: Kaleidoscope
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~1500
Summary: Zoe has trouble sleeping and discovers that she and Jamie are more alike than she thought.
Title: Flash
Rating: G
Pairing: Zoe/Isobel
Wordcount: ~600
Summary: Really, Isobel couldn’t be held responsible for what she went and said. She was an artist. She sometimes got - swept up in her creative process. Carried away. Overcome. And the camera just loved Zoe. AU In which Zoe is a popstar and Isobel is her photographer.
Title: I've been doing bad things
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Zoe/Jenny
Wordcount: ~2400
Summary: “This is Doctor Zoe Heriot, senior technician aboard station seven. Making my final report. Experiment Zeta is a failure." Zoe's in the middle of sacrificing herself to save the earth from a hoard of the undead when she's rescued by a mysterious blonde girl with a homemade energy-weapon. Or, Zoe and Jenny team up to fight zombies.
Title: Cocoa
Rating: G
Pairing: Peri/Erimem
Wordcount: 500
Summary: “I’ll just have to keep you warm, won’t I?” In which Erimem does not take cold weather well and Peri makes cocoa.
Title: The Dread Pirate Missy
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Missy/Osgood
Wordcount: ~5600
Summary: “It’s all a bit Dread Pirate Roberts, isn’t it? ‘Good-night, Osgood. Sleep well. I’ll most likely kill you when the loop ends’.” Osgood knew she ought to be more concerned at finding herself aboard Missy's TARDIS. Again. And again. And again. In which things get a bit Groundhog Day, Osgood eats a lot of butterscotch, and Missy learns a valuable lesson about friendship.
Title: Queens
Rating: R
Pairing: Charley Pollard/Clara Oswald
Wordcount: ~4500
Summary: "Honestly, Charley, I leave you alone for one afternoon and you get arrested for grand larceny!" Charley was just minding her own business in the lobby of the Hotel Delilah when a perfect stranger took her by the arm and declared that they were married. Now she's fallen in with a jewel thief and things are getting very silly indeed.
Title: Cultural Exchange
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe
Wordcount: ~1400
Summary: "I saw things. Things that I will never be able to unsee." In which Zoe finds out the hard way what a Scotsman wears under his kilt.
Title: Rituals
Rating: G
Characters: First Doctor, Ian Chesterton
Wordcount: ~700
Summary: “I can’t be dancing about, not with these old bones of mine." The Doctor is challenged to a dance-off, but he can't be doing with dancing. Fortunately, he has a handy substitute!
Title: Space
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Jamie+Zoe
Wordcount: ~370
Summary: Things Jamie had come to understand about space: it was vast, and dark, and sometimes beautiful; it was also cold, and brutal, and unforgiving. Jamie spacewalks to rescue Zoe. Missing scene from Second Chances.
Title: Priorities
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: Jamie finds it odd that the Doctor takes more issue with swearing than with buggery. The Doctor fails to see the inconsistency. They discuss this during the act, so to speak.
Title: Learning Curve
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~650
Summary: “You see, that’s your problem. That attitude." Jamie learns a lesson about paying compliments and talking to women.
Title: In the kirkyard
Rating: G
Characters: Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~2000
Summary: He flew to the moon and back. He liked the Beatles. He was one of the bravest people I ever knew. I miss him. On holiday in Inverness, Polly stumbles upon Jamie's grave.
Warnings: Major character death
Title: The Festival of the Moon
Rating: G
Characters: Polly+Jamie, Polly/Ben, Two
Wordcount: ~8100
Summary: “Our arrival was rather poorly timed.” / “Ain’t it always?” Ben, Polly and Jamie were having such a nice day until they were arrested for trespassing. Fortunately, the Doctor manages to talk the temple guards out of beheading them. All they have to do is get married. To each other. In which Ben and Polly are confused about their feelings, Jamie is amazed and perplexed, and the Doctor is unperturbed.
Title: Not how you spell chauvinistic
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~1500
Summary: Zoe wondered if a hundred lines might be a cruel and unusual punishment to impose on someone who wrote as slowly as Jamie. The Doctor makes Jamie write lines and teaches Zoe how to play four dimensional chess.
Title: Turnabout
Rating: R
Characters: Jamie, Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~2500
Summary: In which Zoe gives Jamie a taste of his own medicine and Jamie finds he likes it. Post-Prison in Space.
Title: Six Things Zoe Learned From Jamie
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~7700
Summary: Jamie was giving her that look which said 'You poor soul, is this not screamingly obvious' and being on the receiving end of it for a change was giving her a nasty sinking feeling in her stomach. Things Jamie taught Zoe, or how Zoe learned that she doesn't always have to know everything.
Title: For a Little While
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1300
Summary: “We’ve things to do.” / “I thought you said we were on holiday?” The Doctor wants to do holiday things. Jamie wants to sleep in. Fluffy smut set during Helicon Prime.
Title: Lines and Dots
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~250
Summary: “It’s just a bunch of lines and dots. There’s no sense to it.” / “Maybe that’s the point. That we’re meant to find the sense in it.” Jamie and Zoe and abstract art.
Title: Infinity
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1800
Summary: Jamie remembered when the Doctor had first explained evolution to him. It had taken him some time to wrap his head around it, but once he did he felt terribly small. A hundred or a thousand years seemed a long time to him; millions and millions was too much time to fit in his head. Or when he’d learned that continents shifted over time, like tides on the sea but bigger and much, much slower; that long, long ago the land that would be Scotland was thousands of miles further south and underwater.
Title: Easy-Going
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~1300
Summary: Zoe allowed herself a moment to reflect on the circumstances that had led her to this, trapped between the wall of a very nice country house in an earth colony in the twenty-eighth century and the unconscious body of a spectacularly drunk Scotsman from the eighteenth. Or, Jamie gets drunk and makes a pass at Zoe.
Title: Blunder
Rating: R
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1600
Summary: “Is there any particular reason why you’re handcuffed to the console?” / “Oh, aye, course there is. And it’s a good reason too. You know. One of those good reasons people have for cuffin’ themselves to things.” Zoe finds Jamie handcuffed to the TARDIS console. Jamie tries to play it off like it's no big deal. Confusion ensues.
Title: Penguins
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Polly
Wordcount: ~700
Summary: “What’re they?” / "They're gorillas." / “I feel like I should be sayin’ how do you do.” Polly and Jamie at the zoo.
Title: Quaint
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~2000
Summary: 'Oh no,' thought Zoe. 'I've broken him. And we were having such a nice afternoon.' Zoe defines 'bisexuality' for Jamie, prompting a difficult realisation.
Title: Help!
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Polly
Wordcount: ~2000
Summary: Polly finds the Doctor's record collection and introduces Jamie to The Beatles.
Title: A Lesson in Tying Knots
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~4200
Summary: The Doctor follows through on his promise to teach Jamie a lesson. He has some interesting teaching methods. Or, the Doctor ties Jamie to the bed and has his way with him.
Title: Warmth
Rating: PG
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~360
Summary: In which the Doctor is sleepy and Jamie is curious about Gallifreyan physiology.
Title: Good Morning
Rating: PG
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1350
Summary: After their first night together, Jamie is most put out to wake up alone. In which Jamie is melodramatic, the Doctor is restless, and there's a lot of kissing.
Title: Stars
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~2500
Summary: “Zoe’s given birth to a three-headed baby. And it’s been carried off. By the Cybermen. The Cybermen have carried off Zoe’s three-headed baby, Doctor.” In which the Doctor has terrible listening skills, Jamie wants attention, and they kiss for the first time.
Title: Gravity
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~4200
Summary: In which Jamie gets his first view of earth from space and learns what 'gravity' is. Or, the Doctor turns Jamie's world upside down.
Title: Traditional
Rating: G
Characters: Two, Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~160
Summary: “Jamie, if you really must wear your kilt in the traditional manner, could you please try to sit with your legs together?”
Title: New Togs
Rating: G
Characters: Polly, Jamie
Wordcount: ~740
Summary: It struck Polly that it was a bit silly to be mourning somebody else’s ruined shirt. Polly helps Jamie pick out new clothes from the TARDIS wardrobe and gets to know him a little better.
Title: Perfect
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~3000
Summary: How could he even begin to explain to Jamie the joy of exploring an entirely new nervous system? There was only so much one could learn on one’s own. First times, Jamie with the Doctor, the Doctor with Jamie and in his new body.
Title: Tired
Rating: PG
Characters: Two, Jamie
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: Still, Jamie told himself, as he did most days, it wouldn’t be forever. Sooner or later the Doctor would be back to his old self, and then they’d find a way out of his mess. Jamie takes care of the Doctor after he's been drained by the Intelligence.
Title: Home
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Polly, Ben
Wordcount: ~400
Summary: “Where will you go?” Polly said, a hesistant note creeping into her voice. Truth be told, Jamie'd been trying not to think too much about it. Missing scene from The Highlanders.
Title: Class
Rating: G
Pairing: Ben/Polly
Wordcount: 760
Summary: Ben still felt out of sorts in a posh place like this, as if any minute now one of the smart waiters was going to say 'what are you doing in here, you grubby little oik' and toss him out on the street. In which getting caught up in an exciting adventure with daleks, Sontarans and dinosaurs makes Polly late for her dinner engagement and Ben is very confused.
Title: Under the Table
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1800
Summary: The Doctor was looking blandly ahead, listening to the conversation, like everything was normal, like he wasn’t tossing Jamie off under the dainty tablecloth. The Doctor gets bored at an official dinner and finds an interesting way to entertain himself.
Title: Just You
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~900
Summary: “You’re a dirty old man with a fetish for boys in kilts.” / “Who said anything about boys? Just you.” In which the Doctor has a fetish and Jamie is amused.
Title: Story Time
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: “That’s no what you said this morning. Best carnival in the universe, you said. Once in a lifetime, you said.” / “I’m certain I was exaggerating.” In which Jamie has the flu and the Doctor wants to read him a story.
Title: Trust Exercise
Rating: G
Characters: Two+Jamie
Wordcount: ~2100
Summary: “You’re not serious." / “I’m always serious,” said the Doctor, which was a lie if Jamie ever heard one. In which Jamie is scared of heights and the Doctor is a dragon.
Title: Sweet
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: 710
Summary: In which the Doctor and Jamie go to a street party and feed each other cake.
Title: Fixation
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~650
Summary: Just last week Jamie’d given himself a very stern talking to about thinking inappropriate and sinful thoughts about the Doctor, and promised himself that he wouldn’t do it anymore, and yet here he was. Doing it again.
Title: Beside The Seaside
Rating: G
Characters: Two, Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~700
Summary: “Look, mate. You take us to the year five million or, I don’t know, the fall of Troy or something, that’s impressive. But this is - what, Blackpool? And it’s the off season.” In which the Doctor, Jamie and Polly gang up on Ben.
Title: Cosy
Rating: G
Characters: Two, Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~770
Summary: The Doctor puts up with Jamie parading around Siberia and the Himalayas in his kilt, but he draws the line at the ice-moon of Argak 3. Jamie refuses to put on a pair of trousers. They'll just have to find a compromise.
Title: Lost Buttons
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Eight/Jamie; Two, Zoe, Charley
Wordcount: ~1400
Summary: Jamie was struggling to keep up with events. One moment he’d been fleeing through the halls of the space station, then he’d run slap bang into a man clad in green velvet who’d greeted him by name in the most delighted tone and then expected Jamie to know who he was. Or, Jamie runs into Eight and shags him in a cupboard.
Title: Island
Rating: G
Pairing: Two+Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~900
Summary: Zoe was honestly baffled. Reading was supposed to be a solitary activity, and she didn’t understand why anyone would want to spoil it with snuggling and hair-petting. Zoe walks in on the Doctor and Jamie's private activities. She's confused, Jamie is embarrassed, and the Doctor is by and large unruffled.
Title: Rock Pools
Rating: G
Characters: Two+Jamie, Victoria
Wordcount: ~600
Summary: “You’re a strange wee chappie, you know that?” / “Thank you,” said the Doctor, even though Jamie hadn’t really paid him a compliment. In which the Doctor gives Jamie a present and Victoria is amused by crabs.
Title: In The Fishtank
Rating: R
Characters: Two, Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~3500
Summary: Jamie and Zoe cross the most powerful man in Space Colony Galene and get treated to his favourite way of dealing with people who vex him: his pet 'fish'. Or, the one where Zoe punches a shark.
Title: In The Middle
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Ben/Jamie/Polly/Two
Wordcount: ~950
Summary: When all this was over, Ben would probably take it as a lesson about history, and how it wasn’t a strict progression from less to more liberated, and why you shouldn’t make assumptions about people based on what century they came from, and all that lark. Or, Ben, Polly and Jamie have a threesome and the Doctor tags along for the ride.
Title: Life Lessons
Rating: G
Pairing: Two+Jamie
Wordcount: ~9700
Summary: "You’ve just taken your first step into a wider universe.” / “I have?” Five lessons the Doctor taught Jamie about life.
His Dark Materials
Title: Six Settlings
Rating: G
Characters: Mrs Coulter, Lord Asriel, Lee Scoresby, John Faa, Father Coram, the Master of Jordan
Summary: Six characters. Six dæmons. Six different settlings.
Title: Midsummer
Rating: G
Characters: Will, Lyra, OFC
Summary: Two women come to the Botanic gardens at midsummer, to wonder and weep.
Torchwood
Title: Yes, Ianto?
Rating: PG
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Summary: Ianto has something to say
Title: Yes, Sir?
Rating: PG
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Summary: No-one has come to work but Ianto.
Star Wars
Title: Last Hours
Rating: PG-13
Characters: OCs
Summary: During ROTJ, two Imperial officers spend their last hours together, and ponder the question that has plagued man since the dawn of time: are Imperial officers ever allowed to take off their hats?
Title: Serenity
Rating: G
Characters: Wedge, Wes: Serenity
Summary: Star Wars/Firefly crossover drabble for the prompt serenity.
Other Fandoms
Title: Who puts a bubble machine inside a mountain?
Fandom: The Logical Journey of the Zoombinis
Rating: G
Summary: Who built the bubble machine?
Title: Pretty Little Wombat
Fandom: Desparate Romantics
Rating: R
Pairing: Rossetti/Lizzie
Summary: Rossetti was fond of wombats. Rossetti's fondness shows itself in him calling his nearest and dearest after the little things and making comparisons (which they find insulting and he thinks are romantic). Drabble.
Almost all links go to livejournal or the AO3, but some stuff was only ever posted on FF.net or Teaspoon.
kathkin on the AO3!
Anything marked with a * is not worth reading and is only here for consistency.
( Merlin)
Adventures of Sinbad
Title: Ineffable
Rating: G
Pairing: Maeve/Sinbad
Summary: Sinbad and Maeve get separated from the rest of the crew, share a moment, and learn something new about each other. Were it anyone other than Sinbad it might even have been romantic. Early S1, UST.
Title: Trust
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Maeve/Sinbad
Summary: You know what your problem is? You just don’t trust me!” Maeve demands Sinbad prove he trusts her, a.k.a the one where Sinbad discovers his suppressed sub kink and Maeve is secretly an epic domme.
Doctor Who
Title: No Such Thing As Ghosts
Rating: G
Characters: Donna Noble, Adric
Summary: When Donna Noble was eight and a half, she went through a rather odd phase but she persuaded herself that she'd just been dreaming. Because there wasn't any such thing as ghosts. The Doctor had told her that, and he would know.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Someone Special
Rating: G
Pairing: Nyssa/Adric, Five/Tegan
Summary: Nyssa and Adric are acting rather strangely. Tegan is suspicious. The Doctor won't believe her.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Parts - One/Two/Three
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Adric, Nyssa, Tegan
Summary: Musings on Adric's death
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: His
Rating: PG
Pairing: Five/Tegan
Summary: It was something about this regeneration. He was seeing people differently.
Title: Happy Birthday
Rating: G
Characters: Ten, Rose
Summary: Rose wants to go to Barcelona, but the Doctor has other plans
Title: Giant Locusts
Rating: G
Characters: Four, Adric
Summary: The Fourth Doctor and Adric sample a local delicacy.
Title: Closed Doors
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Five, Adric, Nyssa
Summary: Adric wakes up and something is very wrong.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Bad Dream
Rating: PG
Characters: Five, Nyssa
Summary: Nyssa has had a nightmare.
Warnings: Canon-compliant character death
Title: Things Beyond Comprehension
Rating: PG
Characters: Two, Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~5400
Summary: It was one of the first lessons Jamie had ever learned: if you wanted to get the measure of a man, you looked at his dæmon. And if you couldn’t see a man’s dæmon? Well, you couldn’t trust him at all. An AU in which humans have dæmons and Time Lords don't. His Dark Materials fusion.
Warnings: Some violence.
Title: Numb
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Two, Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~8300
Summary: Jamie wasn’t afraid of dying - but if there was one thing travelling with the Doctor had taught him, it was that there were worse things. In which Jamie is captured by the cybermen and partially cyber-converted.
Warnings: Violence, body horror.
Title: Happy Accidents
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~8600
Summary: Don’t touch the plants, Jamie! Sex pollen leads to an impromptu biology lesson, which leads to further sex.
Warnings: Dubious consent
Title: Circles
Rating: G
Characters: Two+Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~2700
Summary: It was one of humanity's stranger quirks, these soul-marks. Words on their skin, names of people they haven't met yet. Jamie McCrimmon never knew what to make of his, until he met the Doctor.
Title: First Snow
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~2300
Summary: There's lights in the sky and strange noises in the woods. But who cares about that when it's snowing! Or, Zoe has never seen snow before, and Jamie introduces her to the joy and fun of snowball fights.
Title: Jumpsuits and Crinolines
Rating: G
Pairing: Zoe/Victoria
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: “I don’t dare,” said Zoe. “If I move I’ll fall over. I’ll get stuck on my back like a tortoise.” Victoria and Zoe trade outfits. The Doctor can't tell them apart.
Title: Wee Hairy Beastie
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~1500
Summary: Jamie and Zoe are exploring an abandoned house when they come across a terrifying hairy beastie! Did I say hairy beastie? I meant spider. They come across a spider. In which Zoe exploits Jamie's sense of chivalry, Jamie is scared of spiders, and the Doctor is very enthusiastic about the local flora.
Title: Kaleidoscope
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~1500
Summary: Zoe has trouble sleeping and discovers that she and Jamie are more alike than she thought.
Title: Flash
Rating: G
Pairing: Zoe/Isobel
Wordcount: ~600
Summary: Really, Isobel couldn’t be held responsible for what she went and said. She was an artist. She sometimes got - swept up in her creative process. Carried away. Overcome. And the camera just loved Zoe. AU In which Zoe is a popstar and Isobel is her photographer.
Title: I've been doing bad things
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Zoe/Jenny
Wordcount: ~2400
Summary: “This is Doctor Zoe Heriot, senior technician aboard station seven. Making my final report. Experiment Zeta is a failure." Zoe's in the middle of sacrificing herself to save the earth from a hoard of the undead when she's rescued by a mysterious blonde girl with a homemade energy-weapon. Or, Zoe and Jenny team up to fight zombies.
Title: Cocoa
Rating: G
Pairing: Peri/Erimem
Wordcount: 500
Summary: “I’ll just have to keep you warm, won’t I?” In which Erimem does not take cold weather well and Peri makes cocoa.
Title: The Dread Pirate Missy
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Missy/Osgood
Wordcount: ~5600
Summary: “It’s all a bit Dread Pirate Roberts, isn’t it? ‘Good-night, Osgood. Sleep well. I’ll most likely kill you when the loop ends’.” Osgood knew she ought to be more concerned at finding herself aboard Missy's TARDIS. Again. And again. And again. In which things get a bit Groundhog Day, Osgood eats a lot of butterscotch, and Missy learns a valuable lesson about friendship.
Title: Queens
Rating: R
Pairing: Charley Pollard/Clara Oswald
Wordcount: ~4500
Summary: "Honestly, Charley, I leave you alone for one afternoon and you get arrested for grand larceny!" Charley was just minding her own business in the lobby of the Hotel Delilah when a perfect stranger took her by the arm and declared that they were married. Now she's fallen in with a jewel thief and things are getting very silly indeed.
Title: Cultural Exchange
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe
Wordcount: ~1400
Summary: "I saw things. Things that I will never be able to unsee." In which Zoe finds out the hard way what a Scotsman wears under his kilt.
Title: Rituals
Rating: G
Characters: First Doctor, Ian Chesterton
Wordcount: ~700
Summary: “I can’t be dancing about, not with these old bones of mine." The Doctor is challenged to a dance-off, but he can't be doing with dancing. Fortunately, he has a handy substitute!
Title: Space
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Jamie+Zoe
Wordcount: ~370
Summary: Things Jamie had come to understand about space: it was vast, and dark, and sometimes beautiful; it was also cold, and brutal, and unforgiving. Jamie spacewalks to rescue Zoe. Missing scene from Second Chances.
Title: Priorities
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: Jamie finds it odd that the Doctor takes more issue with swearing than with buggery. The Doctor fails to see the inconsistency. They discuss this during the act, so to speak.
Title: Learning Curve
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie+Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~650
Summary: “You see, that’s your problem. That attitude." Jamie learns a lesson about paying compliments and talking to women.
Title: In the kirkyard
Rating: G
Characters: Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~2000
Summary: He flew to the moon and back. He liked the Beatles. He was one of the bravest people I ever knew. I miss him. On holiday in Inverness, Polly stumbles upon Jamie's grave.
Warnings: Major character death
Title: The Festival of the Moon
Rating: G
Characters: Polly+Jamie, Polly/Ben, Two
Wordcount: ~8100
Summary: “Our arrival was rather poorly timed.” / “Ain’t it always?” Ben, Polly and Jamie were having such a nice day until they were arrested for trespassing. Fortunately, the Doctor manages to talk the temple guards out of beheading them. All they have to do is get married. To each other. In which Ben and Polly are confused about their feelings, Jamie is amazed and perplexed, and the Doctor is unperturbed.
Title: Not how you spell chauvinistic
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~1500
Summary: Zoe wondered if a hundred lines might be a cruel and unusual punishment to impose on someone who wrote as slowly as Jamie. The Doctor makes Jamie write lines and teaches Zoe how to play four dimensional chess.
Title: Turnabout
Rating: R
Characters: Jamie, Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~2500
Summary: In which Zoe gives Jamie a taste of his own medicine and Jamie finds he likes it. Post-Prison in Space.
Title: Six Things Zoe Learned From Jamie
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe, Two
Wordcount: ~7700
Summary: Jamie was giving her that look which said 'You poor soul, is this not screamingly obvious' and being on the receiving end of it for a change was giving her a nasty sinking feeling in her stomach. Things Jamie taught Zoe, or how Zoe learned that she doesn't always have to know everything.
Title: For a Little While
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1300
Summary: “We’ve things to do.” / “I thought you said we were on holiday?” The Doctor wants to do holiday things. Jamie wants to sleep in. Fluffy smut set during Helicon Prime.
Title: Lines and Dots
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~250
Summary: “It’s just a bunch of lines and dots. There’s no sense to it.” / “Maybe that’s the point. That we’re meant to find the sense in it.” Jamie and Zoe and abstract art.
Title: Infinity
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1800
Summary: Jamie remembered when the Doctor had first explained evolution to him. It had taken him some time to wrap his head around it, but once he did he felt terribly small. A hundred or a thousand years seemed a long time to him; millions and millions was too much time to fit in his head. Or when he’d learned that continents shifted over time, like tides on the sea but bigger and much, much slower; that long, long ago the land that would be Scotland was thousands of miles further south and underwater.
Title: Easy-Going
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~1300
Summary: Zoe allowed herself a moment to reflect on the circumstances that had led her to this, trapped between the wall of a very nice country house in an earth colony in the twenty-eighth century and the unconscious body of a spectacularly drunk Scotsman from the eighteenth. Or, Jamie gets drunk and makes a pass at Zoe.
Title: Blunder
Rating: R
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1600
Summary: “Is there any particular reason why you’re handcuffed to the console?” / “Oh, aye, course there is. And it’s a good reason too. You know. One of those good reasons people have for cuffin’ themselves to things.” Zoe finds Jamie handcuffed to the TARDIS console. Jamie tries to play it off like it's no big deal. Confusion ensues.
Title: Penguins
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Polly
Wordcount: ~700
Summary: “What’re they?” / "They're gorillas." / “I feel like I should be sayin’ how do you do.” Polly and Jamie at the zoo.
Title: Quaint
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~2000
Summary: 'Oh no,' thought Zoe. 'I've broken him. And we were having such a nice afternoon.' Zoe defines 'bisexuality' for Jamie, prompting a difficult realisation.
Title: Help!
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Polly
Wordcount: ~2000
Summary: Polly finds the Doctor's record collection and introduces Jamie to The Beatles.
Title: A Lesson in Tying Knots
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~4200
Summary: The Doctor follows through on his promise to teach Jamie a lesson. He has some interesting teaching methods. Or, the Doctor ties Jamie to the bed and has his way with him.
Title: Warmth
Rating: PG
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~360
Summary: In which the Doctor is sleepy and Jamie is curious about Gallifreyan physiology.
Title: Good Morning
Rating: PG
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1350
Summary: After their first night together, Jamie is most put out to wake up alone. In which Jamie is melodramatic, the Doctor is restless, and there's a lot of kissing.
Title: Stars
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~2500
Summary: “Zoe’s given birth to a three-headed baby. And it’s been carried off. By the Cybermen. The Cybermen have carried off Zoe’s three-headed baby, Doctor.” In which the Doctor has terrible listening skills, Jamie wants attention, and they kiss for the first time.
Title: Gravity
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~4200
Summary: In which Jamie gets his first view of earth from space and learns what 'gravity' is. Or, the Doctor turns Jamie's world upside down.
Title: Traditional
Rating: G
Characters: Two, Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~160
Summary: “Jamie, if you really must wear your kilt in the traditional manner, could you please try to sit with your legs together?”
Title: New Togs
Rating: G
Characters: Polly, Jamie
Wordcount: ~740
Summary: It struck Polly that it was a bit silly to be mourning somebody else’s ruined shirt. Polly helps Jamie pick out new clothes from the TARDIS wardrobe and gets to know him a little better.
Title: Perfect
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~3000
Summary: How could he even begin to explain to Jamie the joy of exploring an entirely new nervous system? There was only so much one could learn on one’s own. First times, Jamie with the Doctor, the Doctor with Jamie and in his new body.
Title: Tired
Rating: PG
Characters: Two, Jamie
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: Still, Jamie told himself, as he did most days, it wouldn’t be forever. Sooner or later the Doctor would be back to his old self, and then they’d find a way out of his mess. Jamie takes care of the Doctor after he's been drained by the Intelligence.
Title: Home
Rating: G
Characters: Jamie, Polly, Ben
Wordcount: ~400
Summary: “Where will you go?” Polly said, a hesistant note creeping into her voice. Truth be told, Jamie'd been trying not to think too much about it. Missing scene from The Highlanders.
Title: Class
Rating: G
Pairing: Ben/Polly
Wordcount: 760
Summary: Ben still felt out of sorts in a posh place like this, as if any minute now one of the smart waiters was going to say 'what are you doing in here, you grubby little oik' and toss him out on the street. In which getting caught up in an exciting adventure with daleks, Sontarans and dinosaurs makes Polly late for her dinner engagement and Ben is very confused.
Title: Under the Table
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~1800
Summary: The Doctor was looking blandly ahead, listening to the conversation, like everything was normal, like he wasn’t tossing Jamie off under the dainty tablecloth. The Doctor gets bored at an official dinner and finds an interesting way to entertain himself.
Title: Just You
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~900
Summary: “You’re a dirty old man with a fetish for boys in kilts.” / “Who said anything about boys? Just you.” In which the Doctor has a fetish and Jamie is amused.
Title: Story Time
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~800
Summary: “That’s no what you said this morning. Best carnival in the universe, you said. Once in a lifetime, you said.” / “I’m certain I was exaggerating.” In which Jamie has the flu and the Doctor wants to read him a story.
Title: Trust Exercise
Rating: G
Characters: Two+Jamie
Wordcount: ~2100
Summary: “You’re not serious." / “I’m always serious,” said the Doctor, which was a lie if Jamie ever heard one. In which Jamie is scared of heights and the Doctor is a dragon.
Title: Sweet
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: 710
Summary: In which the Doctor and Jamie go to a street party and feed each other cake.
Title: Fixation
Rating: G
Pairing: Two/Jamie
Wordcount: ~650
Summary: Just last week Jamie’d given himself a very stern talking to about thinking inappropriate and sinful thoughts about the Doctor, and promised himself that he wouldn’t do it anymore, and yet here he was. Doing it again.
Title: Beside The Seaside
Rating: G
Characters: Two, Jamie, Ben, Polly
Wordcount: ~700
Summary: “Look, mate. You take us to the year five million or, I don’t know, the fall of Troy or something, that’s impressive. But this is - what, Blackpool? And it’s the off season.” In which the Doctor, Jamie and Polly gang up on Ben.
Title: Cosy
Rating: G
Characters: Two, Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~770
Summary: The Doctor puts up with Jamie parading around Siberia and the Himalayas in his kilt, but he draws the line at the ice-moon of Argak 3. Jamie refuses to put on a pair of trousers. They'll just have to find a compromise.
Title: Lost Buttons
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Eight/Jamie; Two, Zoe, Charley
Wordcount: ~1400
Summary: Jamie was struggling to keep up with events. One moment he’d been fleeing through the halls of the space station, then he’d run slap bang into a man clad in green velvet who’d greeted him by name in the most delighted tone and then expected Jamie to know who he was. Or, Jamie runs into Eight and shags him in a cupboard.
Title: Island
Rating: G
Pairing: Two+Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~900
Summary: Zoe was honestly baffled. Reading was supposed to be a solitary activity, and she didn’t understand why anyone would want to spoil it with snuggling and hair-petting. Zoe walks in on the Doctor and Jamie's private activities. She's confused, Jamie is embarrassed, and the Doctor is by and large unruffled.
Title: Rock Pools
Rating: G
Characters: Two+Jamie, Victoria
Wordcount: ~600
Summary: “You’re a strange wee chappie, you know that?” / “Thank you,” said the Doctor, even though Jamie hadn’t really paid him a compliment. In which the Doctor gives Jamie a present and Victoria is amused by crabs.
Title: In The Fishtank
Rating: R
Characters: Two, Jamie, Zoe
Wordcount: ~3500
Summary: Jamie and Zoe cross the most powerful man in Space Colony Galene and get treated to his favourite way of dealing with people who vex him: his pet 'fish'. Or, the one where Zoe punches a shark.
Title: In The Middle
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Ben/Jamie/Polly/Two
Wordcount: ~950
Summary: When all this was over, Ben would probably take it as a lesson about history, and how it wasn’t a strict progression from less to more liberated, and why you shouldn’t make assumptions about people based on what century they came from, and all that lark. Or, Ben, Polly and Jamie have a threesome and the Doctor tags along for the ride.
Title: Life Lessons
Rating: G
Pairing: Two+Jamie
Wordcount: ~9700
Summary: "You’ve just taken your first step into a wider universe.” / “I have?” Five lessons the Doctor taught Jamie about life.
His Dark Materials
Title: Six Settlings
Rating: G
Characters: Mrs Coulter, Lord Asriel, Lee Scoresby, John Faa, Father Coram, the Master of Jordan
Summary: Six characters. Six dæmons. Six different settlings.
Title: Midsummer
Rating: G
Characters: Will, Lyra, OFC
Summary: Two women come to the Botanic gardens at midsummer, to wonder and weep.
Torchwood
Title: Yes, Ianto?
Rating: PG
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Summary: Ianto has something to say
Title: Yes, Sir?
Rating: PG
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Summary: No-one has come to work but Ianto.
Star Wars
Title: Last Hours
Rating: PG-13
Characters: OCs
Summary: During ROTJ, two Imperial officers spend their last hours together, and ponder the question that has plagued man since the dawn of time: are Imperial officers ever allowed to take off their hats?
Title: Serenity
Rating: G
Characters: Wedge, Wes: Serenity
Summary: Star Wars/Firefly crossover drabble for the prompt serenity.
Other Fandoms
Title: Who puts a bubble machine inside a mountain?
Fandom: The Logical Journey of the Zoombinis
Rating: G
Summary: Who built the bubble machine?
Title: Pretty Little Wombat
Fandom: Desparate Romantics
Rating: R
Pairing: Rossetti/Lizzie
Summary: Rossetti was fond of wombats. Rossetti's fondness shows itself in him calling his nearest and dearest after the little things and making comparisons (which they find insulting and he thinks are romantic). Drabble.