Question to you

[kaufie]

How can I, as someone who tries to acknowledge people's actions and freely express my gratitude, process in my brain when others don't do the same?  It does not work to say "some people suck" or anything like that, because it falls into "why should i..." and "if I do, then

Comments

Depends on the help-er's relationship with the help-ee...and the extent of the help.

[anonymous]

If this is a person who is central in your life, someone you interact with regularly and to whom you are strongly emotionally bonded, it is time for a "When you do x, I feel y" chat, regardless of the extent of the help. If the relationship is to survive, these feelings must be expressed and resolved or resentment will build and destruction is inevitable. In a relationship with mutual respect and honesty, an acceptable resolution is likely. If an acceptable resolution is not reached, you might wish to reexamine the relationship for signs of mutual respect and honesty and decide if it should continue

[superdaintykate]

Ultimately, you are only responsible for yourself. The answer to "why should I" is "because I want to and I think it is valuable", and that ever changes, then you should stop.

[kaufie]

Kate, I always appreciate your input. Until you posted this, I thought the other response was from you. I wonder who that is?