Comments | kavieshana: Checking in

kavieshana

Checking in

Jan 24, 2012 22:24

Listen. I always want to start with "listen" so it's like I'm coming in right in the middle and this is a conversation we've been having, have had, will keep having. I've already got you but it can't hurt to hook my finger in a belt loop, pull you closer, and keep you engaged. Listen, this has been a year to talk about and I've barely said anything ( Read more... )

holidays, alabama, my godfather david, family, the death, lists

Comments 18

ayoungjovian January 25 2012, 05:32:01 UTC

I feel the same way about my attempt at acceptance to a 4-year university. Will it be another 6 years before I have a Bachelor's? :(

kavieshana January 25 2012, 05:39:26 UTC

We can all hope not. What are you going for, anyways? I'm in Humanities so I'll have to get a Master's as well. I'll never be out of school.

ayoungjovian January 25 2012, 05:57:12 UTC

Humanities, eh? Which major? Myself as well, in philosophy. I've always planned on getting a few doctorates; philosophy, geology and chemistry specifically. I'm years and years away from those, but other than exploring the world, the only thing I've wanted to do is teach college classes so I'm not too bummed about never leaving school. :P

kavieshana January 25 2012, 06:12:16 UTC

English major with a French minor (or Major, if I can scrape up the money to study in France). Possibly a philosophy minor if my uni deigns to accept the classes I've taken that they rejected initially.

I don't even know what you look like, but I've always imagined you growing up to be a wearer of tweed jackets with leather elbows. Those are lofty goals. I suppose I plan to keep on at school until it becomes too technical to bear, but maybe then I'll just switch topics. I'm going to get a masters in Library Science or in French or I'll go into chemistry too. God, it's an impossible thing to think about. The only thing I've ever wanted to be was alone in a room surrounded by books. Or as I told someone last month, "Reasonably well off." She said that's the same thing not having any goal.

Thread 11

Via my tablet, where it appears there's no way to choose an icon grrgoyl January 25 2012, 06:02:30 UTC

My favorite by far is #14. I hate #15 the most, since very often the internet is all I have of you. If you're going to have casual sex, now is most certainly the ideal time -- maybe not the best place.

You still sound hopelessly melancholy, but then who am I to point fingers?

Ah, we've discovered the fatal flaw. kavieshana January 25 2012, 06:17:32 UTC

You've hit on the thing I probably need to work on the most! I'm sometimes too concerned with being clever or interesting to remember to be interested. You needn't worry about #15 as it seems like I'm already going out of my way to fail at it. Here's as good as any to fail to interact with humans.

I suspect hopeless melancholy is a trait we are stuck with. It's that or the load of lols, capital letters, and exclamation points I've been throwing at you lately.

I was just listening to that song!

Yep. It's going STRAIGHT BACK to the guy in the meadow I bought it from grrgoyl January 25 2012, 20:38:55 UTC

Well, it's the double-edged sword of Android -- there are two LJ apps, the "official" one put out by our Russian overlords which is barebones, won't even let you read your F-list, and has a hopelessly glitchy UI (if you scroll up to edit an earlier part of your post, if you pause while typing after three seconds the cursor jumps back down to the bottom. FUN. Also the formatting gets all screwed up, so you need to post, then get yourself to a computer to fix the formatting manually online. CONVENIENT. APP FAIL ( ... )

Probably easier than selling it back to some crackpot internet vendor. kavieshana January 25 2012, 21:02:28 UTC

You've got the huge tablet - why not navigate the real internet page? It's neat that you do have the option of so many unofficial apps. I'm not sure that's available through Apple.

Maybe I'm always this glum, internally. I'm trying to write something happy and I almost feel like I have to make a list of positive adjectives and intentionally add them in.

Melancholy is appropriate for children, I think. It's what drives them to read. Or maybe it's the other way 'round.

For some reason when I'm responding to your comment it shows my post's current music directly underneath what you've written. I saw that and thought, I don't know, maybe the tablet lets you post your music as a post script to your comments. I know that's ridiculous and that you don't even use last.fm, but last night I thought it the best coincidence in the world that you might have been listening to a song that I remembered having listened to. Smalls, I'm losing my mind.

Thread 5

johhnymayhem February 9 2012, 09:14:10 UTC

The second half of your #4 is something I often repeat to myself as well - "no one else is paying as much attention as you are." My version is shorter, "No one else cares."

#22 = obligatory "Well hello there." But, out of non-judgmental genuine curiosity, what do you hope that to accomplish? Will that actually solve anything or just lead to new issues?

kavieshana February 9 2012, 23:08:59 UTC

It's weird how we're so willing to overlook certain stuff in other people but we obsess over revealing those same things about ourselves. It's alright to suffer fools, but it's not alright to be one.

Good question. I'm not sure exactly what I want that to accomplish, but I do know I am equal parts lonely and terrified of not being alone.