ST fic: Negotiated Hand-Holding (554 words, PG, K/S/U)
A li'l ficlet written for tumblr user warpfactornope. It's technically part of my brand shiny new ST fic series, but the context isn't necessary for this so shh, I'll tell you later. ^^
So Spock, Uhura, and Kirk are walking someplace and Kirk is being obnoxious. He insists on holding Spock’s hand because it’s ~logical “to prevent us from getting separated" or “to maintain balance on the difficult terrain" and Spock keeps pointing out that there is little chance of them getting separated and holding hands is actually an impediment to effective hiking and also Kirk’s hand is perspiring uncomfortably.
Finally Kirk has to (temporarily!) admit defeat and let go of Spock’s hand, but only because yeah it is getting a little sweaty.
And then Uhura (who has been quietly rolling her eyes but not engaging in this particular discussion) says, “Spock, let me hold your hand."
Spock bitch-faces mildly, which is to say at the normal Spockian level, which is to say his bitch-face is pretty obvious. His life is hard, okay? “What is your reason for this request?"
"Because I’m an emotional human and it will please me, and it is logical to please your mate," Uhura says, and smiles like she thinks she’s so cute (she is correct.)
Spock simply nods and extends his hand to perform his boyfriend duty.
Kirk, of course, blows a gasket, and Uhura coolly informs him that “Sometimes honesty is the best policy, Kirk."
Spock concurs: “It is not logical to dissemble in a relationship which is ideally predicated upon trust."
Kirk fumes and pouts and follows them up a few boulders, stepping on Uhura’s shadow maybe a little more aggressively than necessary, and finally he mumbles, “Can-I-please-hold-your-stupid-hand-because-I’m-an-illogical-human-who-likes-boyfriend-stuff." There’s a pause, while Spock looks at him like he’s still rewinding that sentence and Uhura casually hides her smile with the hand that’s not currently entwined with Spock’s slender, nimble, lute-calloused fingers. Kirk takes a breath. “And-I’m-sorry-I-lied-earlier."
"I accept your apology," Spock says gravely.
"Great!" Kirk grins and snatches Spock’s hand, and they skip merrily down the yellow brick road.
Well, okay, “merrily" might be over-stretching it, because a few minutes later Kirk mouths off and Uhura reaches across Spock to punch him in the shoulder.
"She hit me!"
"It’s a gesture of affection." Uhura’s answer is swift and pat and totally full of crap.
Spock doesn’t sigh but pretty much everyone in the universe can tell that he wants to. “Though I understand that emotional gestures are by their nature irrational, such violence between partners is nonetheless troubling-"
"But-" says Kirk.
"-outside a pre-negotiated sexual encounter," Spock finishes.
Kirk and Uhura take a moment to shoot sly, heated smirks at each other because while Uhura has enough hair to justify her hairbrush collection, that doesn’t explain why the hairbrushes keep breaking.
"Though the failure to reconcile such outbursts with a loving relationship may be my own intellectual shortcoming," Spock continues, “it would be reasonable for the two of you to accommodate your mutual partner by refraining from these gestures. At least while I am trapped between you."
"He wants you to stop hitting me," Kirk says.
"I also wish for you to stop provoking her," Spock puts in.
There’s a moment of silence while they digest this.
"Fine," says Uhura.
"Fine," says Kirk. He glances over. “But if we stop holding hands I’m allowed to provoke her again, right?"
Uhura snorts and grins off into the horizon. Spock mentally recites a few stanzas of Vulcan poetry.
This entry is cross-posted from http://kayliemalinza.dreamwidth.org/335598.html (
comments.)
So Spock, Uhura, and Kirk are walking someplace and Kirk is being obnoxious. He insists on holding Spock’s hand because it’s ~logical “to prevent us from getting separated" or “to maintain balance on the difficult terrain" and Spock keeps pointing out that there is little chance of them getting separated and holding hands is actually an impediment to effective hiking and also Kirk’s hand is perspiring uncomfortably.
Finally Kirk has to (temporarily!) admit defeat and let go of Spock’s hand, but only because yeah it is getting a little sweaty.
And then Uhura (who has been quietly rolling her eyes but not engaging in this particular discussion) says, “Spock, let me hold your hand."
Spock bitch-faces mildly, which is to say at the normal Spockian level, which is to say his bitch-face is pretty obvious. His life is hard, okay? “What is your reason for this request?"
"Because I’m an emotional human and it will please me, and it is logical to please your mate," Uhura says, and smiles like she thinks she’s so cute (she is correct.)
Spock simply nods and extends his hand to perform his boyfriend duty.
Kirk, of course, blows a gasket, and Uhura coolly informs him that “Sometimes honesty is the best policy, Kirk."
Spock concurs: “It is not logical to dissemble in a relationship which is ideally predicated upon trust."
Kirk fumes and pouts and follows them up a few boulders, stepping on Uhura’s shadow maybe a little more aggressively than necessary, and finally he mumbles, “Can-I-please-hold-your-stupid-hand-because-I’m-an-illogical-human-who-likes-boyfriend-stuff." There’s a pause, while Spock looks at him like he’s still rewinding that sentence and Uhura casually hides her smile with the hand that’s not currently entwined with Spock’s slender, nimble, lute-calloused fingers. Kirk takes a breath. “And-I’m-sorry-I-lied-earlier."
"I accept your apology," Spock says gravely.
"Great!" Kirk grins and snatches Spock’s hand, and they skip merrily down the yellow brick road.
Well, okay, “merrily" might be over-stretching it, because a few minutes later Kirk mouths off and Uhura reaches across Spock to punch him in the shoulder.
"She hit me!"
"It’s a gesture of affection." Uhura’s answer is swift and pat and totally full of crap.
Spock doesn’t sigh but pretty much everyone in the universe can tell that he wants to. “Though I understand that emotional gestures are by their nature irrational, such violence between partners is nonetheless troubling-"
"But-" says Kirk.
"-outside a pre-negotiated sexual encounter," Spock finishes.
Kirk and Uhura take a moment to shoot sly, heated smirks at each other because while Uhura has enough hair to justify her hairbrush collection, that doesn’t explain why the hairbrushes keep breaking.
"Though the failure to reconcile such outbursts with a loving relationship may be my own intellectual shortcoming," Spock continues, “it would be reasonable for the two of you to accommodate your mutual partner by refraining from these gestures. At least while I am trapped between you."
"He wants you to stop hitting me," Kirk says.
"I also wish for you to stop provoking her," Spock puts in.
There’s a moment of silence while they digest this.
"Fine," says Uhura.
"Fine," says Kirk. He glances over. “But if we stop holding hands I’m allowed to provoke her again, right?"
Uhura snorts and grins off into the horizon. Spock mentally recites a few stanzas of Vulcan poetry.
This entry is cross-posted from http://kayliemalinza.dreamwidth.org/335598.html (
comments.)