Boys Want Everything - Chapter 4
Boys Want Everything - Chapter 4
Rating: Pg-13 this chapter due to swearing
All the same information from previous chapters apply. I can't believe how long it took me to finish it. I'm never moving houses again if I can help it.
“Is everything alright?” Hunith asked Merlin as they drove back from Eton. She had noticed that Merlin seemed almost sad after saying goodbye to Arthur and she hoped they hadn’t had a fight. She liked Arthur, he was very polite and he was good to Merlin; made him laugh. Merlin had so few friends in Ealdor and while Hunith felt guilty about moving him from Northern Ireland and all of his friends there, she knew the move to England had been in Merlin’s best interest. After everything that had happened with Balinor, she knew it would have made things difficult for Merlin. She had high hopes for him and was so proud of him but she knew the last four years had been hard.
“Yeah,” Merlin replied, startled out of his thoughts.
Hunith glanced over at her son and tried not to sigh. “Did you and Arthur have fun?”
“Yeah.” Merlin looked out the window, not really seeing the landscape as they drove. “What are we doing for the summer holidays?”
“I thought you were working at the shop with me,” Hunith replied, frowning. “I talked to Debbie. She said she would hire you on until September.”
“Arthur said I can visit if I’m in London,” Merlin told her. “Do you…could I go?” He didn’t mind working at the flower shop with his mother. The summer before he’d been able to secure a place at the prestigious educational camp where he’d met Arthur and the others. However, as this next year was his final year of college before going off to uni, he knew he needed to save money to help pay for his expenses.
“Did he say if you could stay with him?” Hunith asked. She didn’t mind letting Merlin go to London for a few days, he would need a break and it would do him good to spend time with friends.
Merlin bit his lip. “I don’t know,” he said slowly. Arthur hadn’t technically invited him to stay; he’d only told Merlin that they could get together if Merlin was in London.
Hunith nodded. “Well, let’s talk to Gaius, shall we? His friend Geoffrey lives in London. In Bayswater, I think. Perhaps you could stay with him and then take the Tube to visit Arthur.”
When they returned to the house they found Gaius in the kitchen making dinner.
“What kind of vegetable would you like?” he asked, smiling pleasantly at them when they entered.
“Er…” Merlin said, looking at his mum for confirmation that Gaius was indeed cooking. Neither Gaius nor his mother was a particularly wonderful cook but Merlin infinitely preferred his mother’s efforts in the kitchen; at least she didn’t overcook everything.
“Perhaps a nice salad,” Hunith said tactfully.
“What are you making?” Merlin asked dubiously after peeking into the oven and seeing what looked like three lumps of coal happily burning away on a baking sheet.
“Chicken,” Gaius replied, looking into the oven and muttering an oath. He quickly grabbed a potholder, threw open the oven door, and yanked out the burnt meat.
“If that’s what’s for dinner, I’m now a vegetarian,” Merlin teased, dancing away from the swat his great-uncle playfully aimed at him.
“Let’s do takeaway,” Hunith said with a smile.
****
On the walk to school the next day Merlin was in a bit of a fog. He was still trying to puzzle out what had happened between himself and Arthur the other night. Nothing happened, he told himself, trying not to remember what Arthur’s hand resting against his hip felt like. It’s not like he kissed me, Merlin thought, my bed’s small and he was probably just curious. That thought made him feel a little depressed but he found that he couldn’t push it away. What if Arthur really had just rested his hand on Merlin’s body because Merlin was there? Arthur was extremely good-looking; girls frequently stole glances at him whenever he and Merlin went out.
Arthur must have had sex with a girl by now, even if he does attend a poncy boy’s school, Merlin thought darkly. Merlin didn’t think about how he had never slept with a girl before, how he wasn’t particularly attracted to girls and had no interest in them as anything other than friends. Not that he had any close female friends.
Merlin entered his school on autopilot, still lost in thought about Arthur and not watching where he was going. He stumbled on the stair leading up to the science block and caught himself on the person walking ahead of him. “S-sorry,” he muttered, trying not to swear when he noticed that it was Daniel whose arm he had grabbed.
Daniel wrenched his arm out of Merlin’s grasp as if it burned. “Don’t touch me.”
“Just can’t help yourself, can you?” drawled a voice from behind.
“Shut up, Ian,” Merlin snapped, hurrying up the stairs in an effort to get away from Ian, Daniel, and whoever else was lurking nearby. The door to his Biology classroom was just a few metres ahead and he could escape from them there.
“Come on, Merlin,” called Ian, jogging up the stairs easily and falling into step with Merlin. “Don’t run away.”
Merlin flushed furiously as Daniel sniggered and he turned to look at the sandy-haired youth who was smirking next to him. “What?”
“Someone’s in a temper,” Ian mocked, his eyes twinkling maliciously.
Merlin rolled his eyes and reached for the Biology doorknob but Ian pressed his hand firmly against the door, keeping it shut. “Stop being stupid,” Merlin groaned. “Go away.”
“’Go away’,” Ian mimicked in a high voice. He dropped his hand from the door and sneered, “Poof” before walking away.
Merlin took a deep breath. He was trying to block out the sound of Daniel and Ian laughing, trying to ignore the stares from the other students, trying not to hear the mutters and whispers that followed him everywhere, and trying not to scream in frustration as he yanked open the door to his Biology class and stormed inside.
For the rest of the day Merlin did his best to avoid Ian, Daniel, and the other members of their group. It was difficult for him as he had French with Justine, Maths with Daniel and Emily, and Chemistry with Ian. However, the four of them ignored him and Merlin managed to make it out of the school at the end of the day without running into any of Ian’s other friends.
As he was walking out of school, Merlin saw Will break away from his group of Sixth Formers and head towards him.
“You don’t have to walk home with me today,” Merlin said when Will joined him, looking back at Stephanie, a pretty dark-skinned girl Will had been chatting with.
“We’re meeting for coffee later,” Will said with a shrug.
“All of you?” Merlin asked, grinning slightly and raising his eyebrow.
Will chuckled. “None of your business.”
Merlin laughed. “That’s a no, then.” He sighed in what he hoped was a wistful way. “I was so hoping you’d invite me along.”
“Shut it, you,” Will said with a grin. After a moment Will said seriously, “I heard you ran into Ian.”
“He’s in Chemistry with me,” Merlin replied, not wanting to have this conversation. Will knew all about what had happened between Merlin and Ian and was one of the few people at school who actually believed Merlin’s side of the story. For that, Merlin was grateful but it didn’t mean he actually wanted to discuss Ian any more than was necessary.
“You shouldn’t talk to him,” Will said, knowing that Merlin was angry at him for bringing this up. “Not after…”
“I know!” Merlin ground out. “It was an accident. I don’t go searching him out.”
“I know that.” Will sighed. “But I also know how much you used to like him.”
“You know, I don’t actually enjoy being called a poofter,” Merlin snapped, his cheeks going pink. Ian’s words were still going around in his head and it made his skin feel hot from the anger he was fighting to control.
Will looked taken aback. “I didn’t say that.”
“Ian did,” Merlin replied. He sighed heavily and turned down his front walk, motioning for Will to join him.
“He’s such a fucking wanker!” Will said furiously, following Merlin up to his room and tossing his rucksack in the corner.
Merlin flopped onto his bed. “At least it’s nearly summer.” He closed his eyes and let out a sigh. “I’m so tired of this.”
“Hang in there, mate,” Will said gently. “You’ll be at uni in a year and you won’t have to put up with that shite anymore.”
Merlin gave a noncommittal snort.
“It won’t be too bad,” Will continued but the words sounded hollow even to him. Merlin put up with everything amazingly well but it was times like this that he could see what a toll it took.
“Maybe I’ll come live with you in September when you’re at Sussex,” Merlin muttered. He didn’t want to think about his final year at college before he went off to university. “When are you moving again?”
“End of August,” Will replied with a shrug. “Mum and I are going to America near the end of July so I’ll start packing sometime after we get back.”
“Where in America?” Merlin asked curiously. He’d never been outside of the UK before but he would have loved to travel. He was very interested in other people’s countries and cultures.
“Boston,” Will replied. “My aunt and uncle moved there six years ago and we’ve never gone.”
Merlin nodded. “Sounds nice.” He grinned when Will just shrugged at him. “It’s better than working at the flower shop.”
Will snickered. “Well, at least you’ll be busy.”
****
Three weeks later Merlin was home alone and absently watching television reruns when his mobile went off. He sighed and checked who was ringing him, not really in the mood to talk to anyone. When he saw Arthur’s name he smiled. Despite both of them having hectic exams schedules, Merlin and Arthur had managed to chat, text, and IM quite a lot over the last few weeks. They’d never discussed what had happened that night when Arthur had stayed over but nothing was awkward and Merlin had never seen a reason to bring it up. He just tried not to think much about it.
“Hi, Arthur,” Merlin said, answering the phone. “Bored again?”
“There isn’t much to do,” Arthur replied.
“You’ve only been back a few days,” Merlin informed him. “You must be busy, I thought you were working for your father.”
“That’s not exactly exciting,” Arthur grumbled. “It’s not like I actually get to do anything useful. I just file papers, make copies, and sit in on meetings sometimes. I’m more like unpaid staff.” He paused for a moment and then added dryly, “I guess that means I’m a slave.”
Merlin laughed. “It’ll get better. Maybe you’ll get to travel with him for an important case.”
“Maybe pigs will fly.” Arthur sighed down the line. “Are you going to come to London?”
“I have to talk to Mum and Gaius,” Merlin replied. “It all depends on whether I can stay with Gaius’s friend Geoffrey. I think Gaius wants to go with me and visit, so he needs to ask off from the pharmacy.”
“Why can’t you stay with me?” Arthur demanded. “There’s plenty of space and Leon’s coming up from Bath next week.”
Merlin was stunned. He hadn’t thought he was invited to stay with Arthur, he thought that Arthur only wanted to get together if Merlin managed to make it to London. Admittedly, it was less than an hour by train to Paddington Station but Merlin didn’t particularly want to take the train there and back in one day. He would much rather stay a few days and explore. He’d only been to London twice before and one of those times had been during the previous summer when he’d been at the educational camp.
“Hello?” Arthur asked. “Merlin, are you there?”
“Oh, sorry,” Merlin said. “I was thinking.”
“Don’t lie to me,” Arthur teased, making Merlin roll his eyes. “So are you going to come visit?”
“Are you sure I can?” Merlin asked, feeling slightly nervous. After everything he’d heard about Arthur’s father, Merlin wasn’t sure he would be welcome. “Won’t your father mind that I’m not…I mean, are you sure that you can skip working for your father to go around London with me?”
Arthur ignored what Merlin’s original question was going to be and said, “He won’t care. He’s not going to be here anyway.”
“Oh,” Merlin replied. He wondered vaguely if Uther being out of town was the only reason Arthur was inviting him but he ignored that thought. It didn’t matter, Arthur was his friend and he wanted Merlin to come visit.
“He’s got a new girlfriend,” Arthur said disgustedly. “They’re going on an exclusive couple’s trip to the Mediterranean for three weeks and leaving Morgana and me behind.”
“Would you want to go with them?” Merlin asked, amused.
“Well, no,” Arthur admitted.
“So the two of you will be alone?” Merlin definitely wanted to go to London and stay with Arthur. He thought his mother would probably let him go for a week if he promised to take a few extra shifts at the shop before he left. It would give him spending money for while he was in London.
“Some of the staff will be here,” Arthur replied. “The housekeeper and such. I think Morgana’s friend Gwen is going to stay and Leon’s coming. Gwaine’s sister lives in town but he’ll probably stay here too.”
“Is there enough space?” Merlin asked. “Should I bring a sleeping bag or something?”
“You can stay in my room,” Arthur replied. “It’ll be fine. There’s plenty of space.”
“Alright,” Merlin said. “When should I come?”
“Whenever you like, really. Leon will be here next Thursday and my father is leaving on Friday,” Arthur answered.
“I’ll talk to Mum,” Merlin told him. “I have to work every day this week. Maybe I could come next weekend after your father leaves?”
“Sure,” Arthur agreed.
****
Hunith agreed to drop Merlin off at the train station in Windsor the following weekend and on Friday night before he left, Merlin began packing what he would need for his eight days in London. Will popped over while Merlin packed and looked on disapprovingly.
“Would you like to help me?” Merlin demanded after Will sighed loudly for the third time.
“Why do you do this to yourself?” Will asked.
“Don’t start,” Merlin said, viciously throwing a pair of jeans into his suitcase. “I don’t want to hear it right now.” He was not having the best of days. He’d run into Ian and Daniel when he was leaving the florist’s and the two had not hesitated to make fun of him for working in a flower shop making bouquets all day. It hadn’t helped when Will had come along and told them off by saying that picking on Merlin was a pathetic excuse for a hobby. Ian had simply replied that Will was right, that Merlin was pathetic, and then sauntered off with Daniel.
Will sighed again. “I don’t want you to get hurt when he throws you away.”
“Arthur isn’t Ian,” Merlin replied. “He’s my friend.” Merlin was getting tired of feeling this way. Normally he was a very happy person - making jokes, teasing his mum and great-uncle, playing video games or watching DVDs with Will - but recently all Will had done was make Merlin feel depressed. Merlin knew it was because Will was concerned that Merlin would have a hard time the following year and was feeling a sense of betrayal for going off to uni. However, Merlin was getting tired of Will’s constant insistence that Arthur was an arsehole and that Merlin needed to stand up for himself against Ian.
“You thought Ian was your friend,” Will reminded him.
“Well, I know that Arthur is,” Merlin said stubbornly. “Can we talk about something else, please?”
They spent the rest of the evening downstairs watching Gaius’s collection of Monty Python DVDs, laughing, and eating crisps. Just before Will walked out the door to head home he gathered Merlin into a big hug and squeezed Merlin once before letting him go.
“Have fun in London,” Will said, a half-smile on his face. “I hope for your sake that Arthur really does like you.”
“He’s my friend,” Merlin replied, rolling his eyes. He was so used to Will saying this sort of thing about Arthur that he didn’t bother to defend him. “Most friends like each other. I might make an exception for you, though.”
Will snickered. “That’s not what I mean.”
Merlin sighed. “I know.” He was quiet for a minute and then walked out the door with Will so that his mother, who was tidying up in the kitchen, couldn’t overhear their conversation.
“Alright, Merlin?” Will asked, looking concerned.
“I wish you didn’t know me so well,” Merlin muttered. “You know, I do try not to think about those things.”
“What things?” Will asked, clearly baffled.
“You know,” Merlin made some kind of indistinct hand gestures that seemed to confuse Will even more, “being anything other than friends with Arthur…or Ian.”
“Ian was a complete prick,” Will snapped. “He had no right…”
“That’s not what I mean.” Merlin sighed. “Look, do you ever think that maybe I don’t talk about that part of me for a reason?”
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Will said gently.
“I’m not ashamed!” Merlin protested. “I just don’t see why I have to talk about it.” He grinned as Will opened his mouth to argue and then Merlin just laughed, making Will look furious. “Will, I’m really not upset about being gay. It’s not that. It’s that I just don’t see what the big deal is. I shouldn’t have to tell people. You don’t have to tell people you like girls so why should I have to tell them I like…” he fumbled a minute, not sure if he should continue but he could see that Will was now looking incredibly pleased.
“Okay, Merlin, I’m sorry,” Will replied, grinning. “I just…well, after everything happened with Ian I thought that you hated yourself and that scared me.”
“That was over a year ago,” Merlin said. “Did you think I was going to jump off a bridge or something?”
Will shrugged. “I don’t know what I thought. I know that Ian’s lot are horrible to you.”
“I hate how they treat me,” Merlin said honestly. “Like I’m some kind of freak or pervert.” He sighed. “It hurts.”
“What about Arthur?” Will asked.
“He doesn’t know,” Merlin said, fidgeting a little. He hadn’t told Arthur for the same reason he’d just given Will, he shouldn’t have to tell anyone…
Will looked angry again and demanded, “Then how do you know he’s your friend? Merlin, you’re right, in a perfect world you wouldn’t have to tell anyone because no one would give a fuck. Unfortunately, we live in the real world. We live in a world where people are killed for being gay, where people’s families disown them.”
“My mum would never do that!” Merlin protested.
“Your mum knows,” Will retorted. He snickered at the indignant look on Merlin’s face. “No, I didn’t tell her! Besides, do you think she cares? Merlin, mate, she loves you. I think she just wants you to be happy.”
“I am happy,” Merlin replied. “I don’t really fancy these fights we keep having but I’m perfectly happy the rest of the time.”
They reached Will’s front door and he sighed. “Have fun in London.”
“I will.” Merlin turned to go but looked back when Will grabbed his arm. “Look, I don’t want to fight anymore.”
“Tell him,” Will said firmly. “It’s not worth living a lie with your friends.”
Merlin sighed but he nodded. “Fine.”
****
I’ll meet your train at Paddington. Don’t leave the station until I find you. Was the text Merlin woke up to at half past nine. Now it was nearly two and he was stepping off the train, his duffle bag slung over his shoulder as he made his way towards where Arthur was standing, his back to Merlin as he chatted on his mobile.
“We’ll meet you when we drop his stuff at my house,” Arthur was saying into the phone. He laughed. “No, don’t worry.”
“Arthur,” Merlin said, tapping his friend on the shoulder.
Arthur spun around and smiled in greeting at Merlin. “Alright, mate, I have to go. We’ll see you later.” He pocketed his phone and eyed Merlin. “Did you bring any good clothes?”
Merlin looked down at his black t-shirt, faded jeans, and old black trainers. “Er…I brought my normal clothes.”
Arthur rolled his eyes and muttered, more to himself than to Merlin, “You’re too skinny to fit into anything of mine.”
“Are we having tea with the Queen or something?” Merlin asked, trying not to laugh. “Who cares what I’m wearing.” After a moment he said, “I brought a button down.”
“Maybe I can lend you a jacket,” Arthur said, leading Merlin quickly towards the Tube. He chuckled when Merlin stumbled at the pace due to the added weight of his bag. “You’re such a girl,” Arthur teased, taking the duffle from Merlin and throwing it over his own shoulder. “Let’s go.”
When they reached Arthur’s home in Knightsbridge Merlin tried very hard not to gasp. The inside of the house was gorgeous and luxuriously decorated. Everything seemed to be in perfect order and Merlin couldn’t help but think how he shouldn’t be there. He had known that Arthur was wealthy but this was overwhelming and it made him feel out of place.
“Come on, then,” Arthur said, leading Merlin through the foyer and towards the stairs. “My room is upstairs, like yours.”
“This is nothing like mine,” Merlin protested as they walked up the stairs.
Arthur snorted. “Let’s drop your stuff. Leon and the others are waiting for us at the park.” He led Merlin towards a bedroom on the right.
“Who else is there?” Merlin asked. His eyes widened when they entered Arthur’s room. Arthur had a huge queen sized bed with red blankets, a desk, dresser, and a door that Merlin guessed led to his own bathroom.
Arthur dumped Merlin’s duffle unceremoniously onto the ground next to his bed. “Morgana, Gwen, Lance and Gwaine. I think Morgana’s friend Cenred was there for a bit.”
“Friend?” Merlin asked, grinning when Arthur rolled his eyes. “You must really like him.”
“He’s fine,” Arthur said shortly. “Ready?”
Merlin nodded and followed Arthur out of the house. “Why do I need nice clothes?”
“My uncle is taking us to dinner,” Arthur replied, directing Merlin down the street to his right.
“Oh.” Merlin thought of how posh Arthur’s house had been and he knew that they weren’t going for a curry or to the local chip place. “Somewhere posh?”
“Exactly,” Arthur muttered darkly. “He always does this whenever my father is out of town. I think he usually wants to take just Morgana but he can’t play favourites and leave me out.” He grinned. “She’d kill me if I left her with him.”
“Why?” Merlin asked. They had just entered Hyde Park and Merlin continued to follow Arthur.
“He’s a little strange,” Arthur conceded. “Nothing wrong with him, mind, he’s a great solicitor and my father likes him but he is odd.” He shrugged. “Anyway, he spends most of his time in Manchester but he’s come down for the weekend to visit a friend or something.”
“And to take you to dinner,” Merlin reminded him.
“No,” Arthur said, grinning a little evilly, “to take us to dinner.”
Merlin was about to protest that he didn’t have to go to dinner, he could surely stay behind, but then he heard someone yell his name and he broke into a huge grin. “Gwaine!”
Gwaine ran forwards and practically tackled Merlin pulling him into a huge hug. “It’s been ages!”
“Well, you could have come to Ealdor,” Merlin said, hugging Gwaine back. With his back to Arthur, Merlin didn’t notice that Arthur frowned or that his eyebrows knitted together crossly.
Gwaine ignored Arthur but let Merlin go, a grin still on his face. “Nah, mate, I was with my mum in Dublin for most of the year.” He jerked his head towards Arthur. “I saw the princess a few times, though, when I came to visit my granddad.”
“And your sister,” Arthur reminded him, ignoring the princess jibe, though his eyes were now dancing with laughter.
“Old toad,” Gwaine muttered.
“You found us!” Leon said, joining them at a more leisurely pace than Gwaine had. Lance, who had a football tucked under his arm, was with Leon as well as two girls Merlin had never met. “Alright, Merlin?”
Merlin grinned. “Hi, Leon.”
Lance dropped the football on the grass and threw an arm around Merlin. He pulled Merlin over to the girls. “Since Arthur seems to have forgotten his manners, I’ll introduce you.” He ignored Arthur’s protests about how the girls were perfectly capable of introducing themselves.
“It’s not the Dark Ages,” Arthur muttered.
Lance continued to ignore him, though he was grinning. “Merlin, this is Gwen,” he said, smiling at a pretty girl with brown skin and curly dark hair who smiled at both of them.
“I’m Morgana,” said the other girl. She smiled at Merlin and he thought that she was also incredibly pretty with her long black hair, creamy white skin, and light green eyes. “Arthur’s told me about you.”
Merlin’s eyes flicked to Arthur and he decided not to offer the same greeting to Morgana. The things Arthur had told him about Morgana had usually been unflattering and at her expense and he doubted she would appreciate it. “It’s nice to meet you.” He smiled at Gwen. “Both of you.”
“Where’s Cenred?” Arthur asked Morgana. He was absently toeing at the football, clearly wanting to play.
“He went home,” Morgana said with a shrug. “I’ll see him later.” At Arthur’s raised eyebrows Morgana snapped, “Oh shut up, Arthur.”
Arthur laughed and gently nudged the football towards Leon. “Let’s kick it around.”
“Alright,” said Lance, pulling the ball towards him with his foot and taking off in the opposite direction.
“Oi!” called Gwaine but he didn’t run after Lance as Leon and Arthur did. Instead, Gwaine turned to Merlin and the girls. “Shall we take a turn ’round the park?” he asked loftily, mock bowing and making the girls burst out laughing.
“I think we’re going to go to Harrods,” Morgana replied. “Do you want to come?”
Gwaine shook his head. “Shopping’s not really my thing.”
“See you both at dinner,” Merlin said as the girls turned to go.
“I won’t be there,” Gwen said, smiling slightly. “I’m going to my dad’s. I’ll see you after, though.”
“She has an excuse.” Morgana sighed. “Arthur’s dragging you along?” At Merlin’s jerky nod Morgana’s eyes softened. “It won’t be too bad. Leon will be there and he’s really good about Agravaine.” When Merlin still looked apprehensive she grinned and looked pointedly at Gwaine. “Maybe you can find an excuse of your own.”
Gwaine grinned. “Maybe he will.”
****
“You hate your sister,” Arthur argued when Gwaine informed him that he wanted to introduce her to Merlin that evening.
“Yeah,” Gwaine replied. “That’s why it’ll be great having Merlin there. He’ll be a good reason to leave quickly and meet back up at your place.”
“Why can’t Lance go with you? Merlin’s supposed to come to dinner with us.” Arthur was not happy that Gwaine was taking Merlin from him. Merlin was supposed to be his guest, not Gwaine’s. Besides, Gwaine was staying with him to avoid his sister!
“I’m going to see ‘Lion King’ with my parents,” Lance replied. “Sorry.”
“Well, why don’t you both come to dinner with us, then?” Arthur asked, crossing his arms. “Then we can all go visit your sister when we’re done.”
“No can do, mate,” Gwaine said with false remorse. “She doesn’t like you, told me not to bring you round anymore.”
Arthur rolled his eyes. “What makes you think she’ll like Merlin?” He ignored the glare on Merlin’s face.
“I’m counting on her not liking him,” Gwaine replied happily.
Merlin stared at him. “And what’s wrong with me, exactly?”
“Oh, nothing,” Gwaine said, chuckling when he realized that Merlin was actually offended. “You don’t want her to like you. She’s an evil old toad.”
Merlin laughed and shook his head. “Whatever.”
“How are you going to get her to dislike him?” Lance asked curiously. “Everyone likes Merlin.”
Merlin smiled at Lance. He was such a kind-hearted person and Merlin knew that Lance honestly believed what he’d said about Merlin to be true.
Gwaine, however, looked thoughtful at Lance’s words before saying, “Snog him, probably.”
“Excuse me?” Merlin sputtered. “I don’t think I agreed to that part.”
Arthur looked appalled while Lance and Leon just laughed.
“She hates seeing people kissing in public,” Gwaine said happily. “It’s why she doesn’t like you, Arthur. After she caught you and…”
“Aright!” Arthur said loudly, cutting Gwaine off and scowling furiously at him. He ignored Merlin’s curious look and Leon’s grin. “Enough! Take him to meet your sister.”
Gwaine looked triumphant. “Let’s go, Merlin.” He slung an arm around Merlin’s shoulders and led him away.
“Are we really going to meet your sister?” Merlin asked when they reached the Tube station. “Not that I don’t want to meet her of course.”
“No, you really don’t,” Gwaine said, laughing and going over to check the Tube map. “Don’t be ridiculous. She’s horrible.”
“Then where are we going?” Merlin felt his phone buzz in his pocket and he pulled it out to see he had a text from Arthur.
“We could do the Jack the Ripper tour,” Gwaine suggested. “It’s quite good.”
“I’m not that much of a tourist,” Merlin replied. “Let’s just grab food or something and walk around.”
“Sure,” Gwaine said. “I think a friend of mine might be having a party tonight, maybe we could stop by before going back to Arthur’s.”
Merlin shrugged, not sure he wanted to be out that late. He already felt a little guilty about abandoning Arthur so soon after arriving. Going to dinner with Arthur’s uncle really had seemed like too much, though. Merlin wasn’t sure he could have handled it. Thinking about Arthur, Merlin opened the text message Arthur had sent him a few minutes ago and stared at it dumbly.
Don’t let him kiss you.
“You coming?” Gwaine asked, noticing that Merlin was no longer behind him.
Merlin looked up from his phone and smiled brightly. “Yeah, sorry, lost in thought.”
****
“Don’t worry, Arthur will get over it,” Gwaine said later that night as they walked back to Arthur’s family’s house. “I think he was just frustrated that he couldn’t have another person there to help distract his uncle.”
“He said that his uncle’s a little odd.” Merlin followed Gwaine, trusting him to know where he was going. It was nearly eleven and Arthur had already texted both of them, demanding to know when they were coming back.
“He likes to give Arthur a hard time,” Gwaine said with a look at Merlin. “Always going on about how he’s not as good as his father. Loves Morgana, though.”
Merlin winced. “Maybe I should have gone.”
“Nah, I think it’s better that you came with me,” Gwaine said, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.
Merlin laughed. “Well, it does mean I didn’t have to wear anything of Arthur’s.”
Gwaine grinned. “Arthur won’t mind that you skipped out on dinner. He knows his uncle can be a wanker. I think he just was hoping that you’d want to go.”
“He had Leon and Morgana,” Merlin protested. “Why would he think I’d want to go to some fancy restaurant with his nasty uncle?” Merlin laughed. “That sounds awful.”
“Well, it’s definitely not as exciting as hearing about you snogging me in front of my sister,” Gwaine replied with a grin. “Should we still tell him that’s what we did?”
“I don’t think he wants to think of you kissing me,” Merlin replied dryly, thinking of the text Arthur had sent him earlier.
“Course he doesn’t,” Gwaine replied, chuckling. “Arthur’s a selfish arse.”
Merlin frowned. “I don’t belong to Arthur.”
“What?” Gwaine asked, looking confused.
“Just because I mainly see him during the school year doesn’t mean I’m his or anything,” Merlin clarified with a smile, though Gwaine looked even more confused at this. “I have people in my life other than Arthur, you know.”
Gwaine frowned. “Merlin, I don’t do that kind of thing.”
It was Merlin’s turn to look confused. “Huh?”
“I won’t tell Arthur,” Gwaine said, looking at Merlin almost sadly. “I think you should, though. He won’t be happy.”
“What?” Merlin demanded. “Does Arthur think he’s the only person in my life that I like to be with?”
“I think he does,” Gwaine snapped back.
Merlin’s stared at Gwaine as if he’d grown a second head. “What about my mum?”
“What about her?” Gwaine asked, confused again.
“Well, she’s important to me! I thought Arthur liked her too.” Merlin shook his head.
“I’m sure he does,” Gwaine replied, completely bewildered.
“And Lance and Leon and the rest of the Eton lot that I hang around with when I visit Arthur,” Merlin said. “What about them?”
“What about them?” Gwaine turned down Arthur’s street.
“I like being with them as well,” Merlin replied, looking suddenly exhausted. “I thought that was why Arthur introduced us. They’re his mates. Was I not supposed to like them?” He started wondering if maybe Will had been right, if Arthur only invited him over in order to show off his ‘commoner’ friend. “I like being with you and you’re impossible.”
Gwaine stopped suddenly and stared at Merlin. “When you’re with Arthur, what do you do?”
Merlin shrugged. “I don’t know. We watch DVDs, eat chips, and walk around Eton or Ealdor. He tried teaching me how to fence one time but I was rubbish. I think I prefer football and I’m pretty crap at that.”
Gwaine laughed. “Oh, Merlin.” He doubled over, guffawing. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t…”He was still laughing so hard it was difficult for him to talk.
Merlin stared at him. “Are you alright?”
When Gwaine finally got himself under control he just shook his head. “Never mind, forget everything I said.”
“Um…sure,” Merlin replied uncertainly. “You’re not going to yell at me again?” When Gwaine shook his head Merlin added, “I do think I’m allowed to have friends other than Arthur.”
Gwaine started laughing again. “I could snog you now. We don’t have to tell Princess.”
Merlin laughed. “No, I still don’t think Arthur would like it.”
“Suit yourself,” Gwaine replied impishly, wrapping an arm around Merlin’s shoulders and crossing the street to Arthur’s house. “Maybe I could kiss you in front of him?”
Merlin rolled his eyes. “I’d rather not make him angry.”
Gwaine grinned and rang the doorbell. “Yeah, he can be selfish, even when things don’t belong to him.”
“I just don’t want to shock him,” Merlin replied, chuckling.
Gwaine snorted. “Oh, believe me, that’s the last thing that would shock Arthur.”
Arthur threw the door open to see Merlin staring at Gwaine with confusion and Gwaine looking incredibly pleased with himself, his arm over Merlin’s shoulders. “What have you been doing?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.
“Not snogging,” Gwaine said, letting Merlin walk inside first.
Merlin rolled his eyes. “We just walked around and had dinner. London’s nice at night.”
Arthur nodded slowly. “How was Gwaine’s sister?”
“We er…” Merlin stopped, looking over to Gwaine.
“I figured,” Arthur said, sighing. “I’m going to sleep.” He looked at Gwaine. “Margaret put an AeroBed in the guest room for you. I think Leon might still be up, you two can fight over the regular bed.”
Merlin glanced at Gwaine who was frowning at Arthur’s back as he walked up the stairs to his bedroom. “I think he’s mad at me.”
Gwaine shook his head. “I don’t think so.” He sighed and headed to the left of the stairs to a room Merlin hadn’t noticed before. “See you in the morning.”
Merlin wasn’t sure he wanted to follow Arthur into his room if he was in a temper but he didn’t know what his other options were. He could see if he could room with Leon and Gwaine but all of his overnight things were up in Arthur’s room.
“Are you alright, dear?” asked a middle aged woman Merlin assumed must be Margaret, the Pendragon’s housekeeper.
“Oh, yes,” Merlin replied. “Thank you.” He smiled at her before deciding to go up to Arthur’s room and get his things. He would offer to stay in Gwaine and Leon’s room; the last thing he wanted was to have a fight with Arthur.
Merlin was feeling guilty when he opened the door to Arthur’s room. He shouldn’t have been such a coward and let Gwaine drag him off, he told himself. He’d come to visit Arthur, which meant spending time with Arthur even if it wasn’t something Merlin wanted to do.
“Merlin!” Arthur yelped, grabbing a pillow off of his bed and thrusting it in front of him. Merlin didn’t seem to have noticed but he had just barged into Arthur’s room when Arthur was in the middle of changing into his pyjama bottoms. “Can’t you knock?”
“Sorry,” Merlin said, startled out of his thoughts. He smirked at Arthur. “You don’t have anything I haven’t seen before.”
“That’s not the point,” Arthur sniped. “Turn around.”
Merlin laughed but did as he was told. “Maybe you should have locked the door.”
“Or you should have knocked,” Arthur argued. After a moment he said. “You can turn back around.”
Merlin shook his head at Arthur, who was now clothed in pyjama bottoms, and retrieved his duffle bag. “I can share with Gwaine and Leon, if you like.”
Arthur looked hurt but he covered it swiftly and nodded. “I can get Margaret to move the AeroBed up here. You can switch with Leon.”
“Are there any other of those beds?” Merlin asked, looking around and not noticing one for him in Arthur’s room.
“Yeah, we have another one, I think,” Arthur said slowly.
“Well, we could put it in there and then she wouldn’t have to bring it up the stairs. All three of us can fight over the comfortable bed.” He grinned at Arthur who just blinked at him.
“Leon would win,” Arthur commented after a moment.
Merlin shrugged. “I don’t mind using an AeroBed.” He wondered if Arthur was still angry with him for not going to dinner but all Arthur seemed to be was tired. “Are you alright, Arthur?”
“Yeah,” Arthur replied. “Do you want me to ask Margaret for that AeroBed? I can also just ask Leon to switch.”
Merlin thought back to the odd conversation he and Gwaine had had before they reached the house. “No, I think I’d rather have my own bed if I’m sharing a room with Gwaine.”
“What?” Arthur asked, looking surprised. “Is he not your type?”
Merlin felt like he’d been punched in the stomach and gaped at Arthur.
Arthur didn’t appear to notice Merlin’s silence and continued talking, “I thought that’s what took you so long.”
Merlin started laughing. “You twat.”
“Don’t call me a twat,” Arthur snapped, seeming to come out of whatever mood had taken him before. “You’re the one who lied to me about going to see Gwaine’s sister after I invited you to come stay at my family’s house for the week!”
Merlin looked ashamed. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” Arthur said, looking amused. “I don’t blame you. Leon reminded me that he didn’t particularly want to have dinner with Agravaine and that Morgana wasn’t going to make Gwen come even though Gwen is staying here too.” He shrugged. “I guess he thought it was unfair for me to make you go when you really didn’t have to.”
“Why is Gwen staying here when her dad lives in town?” Merlin asked, brushing off what he knew was the best apology he would get out of Arthur.
“She’s been at her father’s but the flat is tiny and her brother just came back from wherever he’s been for the last three years.” He sighed and looked at Merlin a little sadly. “He couldn’t handle it when their mother died and just ran off. I think that they were so happy Elyan’s back that they let him take the other bedroom. Gwen’s been on the couch for the last few days. When my father and Catrina left on their couple’s holiday, Morgana asked Gwen to stay until they come back next month.” He smiled bitterly. “My father doesn’t like for us to have friends over. I think he feels like guests take advantage of him. Anyway, that’s why we have all of you here now. Margaret likes when the house is full and she’s not going to tell him unless we set fire to the beds.”
Merlin snorted. “I’m not planning on doing that.”
“I should hope not,” Arthur replied. “I rather like this bed.”
“Are you angry with me?” Merlin asked, shifting his duffle bag to his other shoulder. It was getting heavy and if Arthur really wasn’t upset then Merlin wanted to set it down and get ready for bed.
“No,” Arthur replied. “Like I said, I understand. I was just hoping to have company.”
“Leon was with you,” Merlin pointed out.
Arthur chuckled. “I guess you’re right. You probably would have knocked over the wine or said something that make my uncle mad.”
Merlin glared at him. “I’m not that bad.”
“Keep lying to yourself,” Arthur said, pulling his blankets back and climbing into bed. “Turn the lights off when you’re finished, I’m going to sleep.”
Continue to Ch 5
Rating: Pg-13 this chapter due to swearing
All the same information from previous chapters apply. I can't believe how long it took me to finish it. I'm never moving houses again if I can help it.
“Is everything alright?” Hunith asked Merlin as they drove back from Eton. She had noticed that Merlin seemed almost sad after saying goodbye to Arthur and she hoped they hadn’t had a fight. She liked Arthur, he was very polite and he was good to Merlin; made him laugh. Merlin had so few friends in Ealdor and while Hunith felt guilty about moving him from Northern Ireland and all of his friends there, she knew the move to England had been in Merlin’s best interest. After everything that had happened with Balinor, she knew it would have made things difficult for Merlin. She had high hopes for him and was so proud of him but she knew the last four years had been hard.
“Yeah,” Merlin replied, startled out of his thoughts.
Hunith glanced over at her son and tried not to sigh. “Did you and Arthur have fun?”
“Yeah.” Merlin looked out the window, not really seeing the landscape as they drove. “What are we doing for the summer holidays?”
“I thought you were working at the shop with me,” Hunith replied, frowning. “I talked to Debbie. She said she would hire you on until September.”
“Arthur said I can visit if I’m in London,” Merlin told her. “Do you…could I go?” He didn’t mind working at the flower shop with his mother. The summer before he’d been able to secure a place at the prestigious educational camp where he’d met Arthur and the others. However, as this next year was his final year of college before going off to uni, he knew he needed to save money to help pay for his expenses.
“Did he say if you could stay with him?” Hunith asked. She didn’t mind letting Merlin go to London for a few days, he would need a break and it would do him good to spend time with friends.
Merlin bit his lip. “I don’t know,” he said slowly. Arthur hadn’t technically invited him to stay; he’d only told Merlin that they could get together if Merlin was in London.
Hunith nodded. “Well, let’s talk to Gaius, shall we? His friend Geoffrey lives in London. In Bayswater, I think. Perhaps you could stay with him and then take the Tube to visit Arthur.”
When they returned to the house they found Gaius in the kitchen making dinner.
“What kind of vegetable would you like?” he asked, smiling pleasantly at them when they entered.
“Er…” Merlin said, looking at his mum for confirmation that Gaius was indeed cooking. Neither Gaius nor his mother was a particularly wonderful cook but Merlin infinitely preferred his mother’s efforts in the kitchen; at least she didn’t overcook everything.
“Perhaps a nice salad,” Hunith said tactfully.
“What are you making?” Merlin asked dubiously after peeking into the oven and seeing what looked like three lumps of coal happily burning away on a baking sheet.
“Chicken,” Gaius replied, looking into the oven and muttering an oath. He quickly grabbed a potholder, threw open the oven door, and yanked out the burnt meat.
“If that’s what’s for dinner, I’m now a vegetarian,” Merlin teased, dancing away from the swat his great-uncle playfully aimed at him.
“Let’s do takeaway,” Hunith said with a smile.
****
On the walk to school the next day Merlin was in a bit of a fog. He was still trying to puzzle out what had happened between himself and Arthur the other night. Nothing happened, he told himself, trying not to remember what Arthur’s hand resting against his hip felt like. It’s not like he kissed me, Merlin thought, my bed’s small and he was probably just curious. That thought made him feel a little depressed but he found that he couldn’t push it away. What if Arthur really had just rested his hand on Merlin’s body because Merlin was there? Arthur was extremely good-looking; girls frequently stole glances at him whenever he and Merlin went out.
Arthur must have had sex with a girl by now, even if he does attend a poncy boy’s school, Merlin thought darkly. Merlin didn’t think about how he had never slept with a girl before, how he wasn’t particularly attracted to girls and had no interest in them as anything other than friends. Not that he had any close female friends.
Merlin entered his school on autopilot, still lost in thought about Arthur and not watching where he was going. He stumbled on the stair leading up to the science block and caught himself on the person walking ahead of him. “S-sorry,” he muttered, trying not to swear when he noticed that it was Daniel whose arm he had grabbed.
Daniel wrenched his arm out of Merlin’s grasp as if it burned. “Don’t touch me.”
“Just can’t help yourself, can you?” drawled a voice from behind.
“Shut up, Ian,” Merlin snapped, hurrying up the stairs in an effort to get away from Ian, Daniel, and whoever else was lurking nearby. The door to his Biology classroom was just a few metres ahead and he could escape from them there.
“Come on, Merlin,” called Ian, jogging up the stairs easily and falling into step with Merlin. “Don’t run away.”
Merlin flushed furiously as Daniel sniggered and he turned to look at the sandy-haired youth who was smirking next to him. “What?”
“Someone’s in a temper,” Ian mocked, his eyes twinkling maliciously.
Merlin rolled his eyes and reached for the Biology doorknob but Ian pressed his hand firmly against the door, keeping it shut. “Stop being stupid,” Merlin groaned. “Go away.”
“’Go away’,” Ian mimicked in a high voice. He dropped his hand from the door and sneered, “Poof” before walking away.
Merlin took a deep breath. He was trying to block out the sound of Daniel and Ian laughing, trying to ignore the stares from the other students, trying not to hear the mutters and whispers that followed him everywhere, and trying not to scream in frustration as he yanked open the door to his Biology class and stormed inside.
For the rest of the day Merlin did his best to avoid Ian, Daniel, and the other members of their group. It was difficult for him as he had French with Justine, Maths with Daniel and Emily, and Chemistry with Ian. However, the four of them ignored him and Merlin managed to make it out of the school at the end of the day without running into any of Ian’s other friends.
As he was walking out of school, Merlin saw Will break away from his group of Sixth Formers and head towards him.
“You don’t have to walk home with me today,” Merlin said when Will joined him, looking back at Stephanie, a pretty dark-skinned girl Will had been chatting with.
“We’re meeting for coffee later,” Will said with a shrug.
“All of you?” Merlin asked, grinning slightly and raising his eyebrow.
Will chuckled. “None of your business.”
Merlin laughed. “That’s a no, then.” He sighed in what he hoped was a wistful way. “I was so hoping you’d invite me along.”
“Shut it, you,” Will said with a grin. After a moment Will said seriously, “I heard you ran into Ian.”
“He’s in Chemistry with me,” Merlin replied, not wanting to have this conversation. Will knew all about what had happened between Merlin and Ian and was one of the few people at school who actually believed Merlin’s side of the story. For that, Merlin was grateful but it didn’t mean he actually wanted to discuss Ian any more than was necessary.
“You shouldn’t talk to him,” Will said, knowing that Merlin was angry at him for bringing this up. “Not after…”
“I know!” Merlin ground out. “It was an accident. I don’t go searching him out.”
“I know that.” Will sighed. “But I also know how much you used to like him.”
“You know, I don’t actually enjoy being called a poofter,” Merlin snapped, his cheeks going pink. Ian’s words were still going around in his head and it made his skin feel hot from the anger he was fighting to control.
Will looked taken aback. “I didn’t say that.”
“Ian did,” Merlin replied. He sighed heavily and turned down his front walk, motioning for Will to join him.
“He’s such a fucking wanker!” Will said furiously, following Merlin up to his room and tossing his rucksack in the corner.
Merlin flopped onto his bed. “At least it’s nearly summer.” He closed his eyes and let out a sigh. “I’m so tired of this.”
“Hang in there, mate,” Will said gently. “You’ll be at uni in a year and you won’t have to put up with that shite anymore.”
Merlin gave a noncommittal snort.
“It won’t be too bad,” Will continued but the words sounded hollow even to him. Merlin put up with everything amazingly well but it was times like this that he could see what a toll it took.
“Maybe I’ll come live with you in September when you’re at Sussex,” Merlin muttered. He didn’t want to think about his final year at college before he went off to university. “When are you moving again?”
“End of August,” Will replied with a shrug. “Mum and I are going to America near the end of July so I’ll start packing sometime after we get back.”
“Where in America?” Merlin asked curiously. He’d never been outside of the UK before but he would have loved to travel. He was very interested in other people’s countries and cultures.
“Boston,” Will replied. “My aunt and uncle moved there six years ago and we’ve never gone.”
Merlin nodded. “Sounds nice.” He grinned when Will just shrugged at him. “It’s better than working at the flower shop.”
Will snickered. “Well, at least you’ll be busy.”
****
Three weeks later Merlin was home alone and absently watching television reruns when his mobile went off. He sighed and checked who was ringing him, not really in the mood to talk to anyone. When he saw Arthur’s name he smiled. Despite both of them having hectic exams schedules, Merlin and Arthur had managed to chat, text, and IM quite a lot over the last few weeks. They’d never discussed what had happened that night when Arthur had stayed over but nothing was awkward and Merlin had never seen a reason to bring it up. He just tried not to think much about it.
“Hi, Arthur,” Merlin said, answering the phone. “Bored again?”
“There isn’t much to do,” Arthur replied.
“You’ve only been back a few days,” Merlin informed him. “You must be busy, I thought you were working for your father.”
“That’s not exactly exciting,” Arthur grumbled. “It’s not like I actually get to do anything useful. I just file papers, make copies, and sit in on meetings sometimes. I’m more like unpaid staff.” He paused for a moment and then added dryly, “I guess that means I’m a slave.”
Merlin laughed. “It’ll get better. Maybe you’ll get to travel with him for an important case.”
“Maybe pigs will fly.” Arthur sighed down the line. “Are you going to come to London?”
“I have to talk to Mum and Gaius,” Merlin replied. “It all depends on whether I can stay with Gaius’s friend Geoffrey. I think Gaius wants to go with me and visit, so he needs to ask off from the pharmacy.”
“Why can’t you stay with me?” Arthur demanded. “There’s plenty of space and Leon’s coming up from Bath next week.”
Merlin was stunned. He hadn’t thought he was invited to stay with Arthur, he thought that Arthur only wanted to get together if Merlin managed to make it to London. Admittedly, it was less than an hour by train to Paddington Station but Merlin didn’t particularly want to take the train there and back in one day. He would much rather stay a few days and explore. He’d only been to London twice before and one of those times had been during the previous summer when he’d been at the educational camp.
“Hello?” Arthur asked. “Merlin, are you there?”
“Oh, sorry,” Merlin said. “I was thinking.”
“Don’t lie to me,” Arthur teased, making Merlin roll his eyes. “So are you going to come visit?”
“Are you sure I can?” Merlin asked, feeling slightly nervous. After everything he’d heard about Arthur’s father, Merlin wasn’t sure he would be welcome. “Won’t your father mind that I’m not…I mean, are you sure that you can skip working for your father to go around London with me?”
Arthur ignored what Merlin’s original question was going to be and said, “He won’t care. He’s not going to be here anyway.”
“Oh,” Merlin replied. He wondered vaguely if Uther being out of town was the only reason Arthur was inviting him but he ignored that thought. It didn’t matter, Arthur was his friend and he wanted Merlin to come visit.
“He’s got a new girlfriend,” Arthur said disgustedly. “They’re going on an exclusive couple’s trip to the Mediterranean for three weeks and leaving Morgana and me behind.”
“Would you want to go with them?” Merlin asked, amused.
“Well, no,” Arthur admitted.
“So the two of you will be alone?” Merlin definitely wanted to go to London and stay with Arthur. He thought his mother would probably let him go for a week if he promised to take a few extra shifts at the shop before he left. It would give him spending money for while he was in London.
“Some of the staff will be here,” Arthur replied. “The housekeeper and such. I think Morgana’s friend Gwen is going to stay and Leon’s coming. Gwaine’s sister lives in town but he’ll probably stay here too.”
“Is there enough space?” Merlin asked. “Should I bring a sleeping bag or something?”
“You can stay in my room,” Arthur replied. “It’ll be fine. There’s plenty of space.”
“Alright,” Merlin said. “When should I come?”
“Whenever you like, really. Leon will be here next Thursday and my father is leaving on Friday,” Arthur answered.
“I’ll talk to Mum,” Merlin told him. “I have to work every day this week. Maybe I could come next weekend after your father leaves?”
“Sure,” Arthur agreed.
****
Hunith agreed to drop Merlin off at the train station in Windsor the following weekend and on Friday night before he left, Merlin began packing what he would need for his eight days in London. Will popped over while Merlin packed and looked on disapprovingly.
“Would you like to help me?” Merlin demanded after Will sighed loudly for the third time.
“Why do you do this to yourself?” Will asked.
“Don’t start,” Merlin said, viciously throwing a pair of jeans into his suitcase. “I don’t want to hear it right now.” He was not having the best of days. He’d run into Ian and Daniel when he was leaving the florist’s and the two had not hesitated to make fun of him for working in a flower shop making bouquets all day. It hadn’t helped when Will had come along and told them off by saying that picking on Merlin was a pathetic excuse for a hobby. Ian had simply replied that Will was right, that Merlin was pathetic, and then sauntered off with Daniel.
Will sighed again. “I don’t want you to get hurt when he throws you away.”
“Arthur isn’t Ian,” Merlin replied. “He’s my friend.” Merlin was getting tired of feeling this way. Normally he was a very happy person - making jokes, teasing his mum and great-uncle, playing video games or watching DVDs with Will - but recently all Will had done was make Merlin feel depressed. Merlin knew it was because Will was concerned that Merlin would have a hard time the following year and was feeling a sense of betrayal for going off to uni. However, Merlin was getting tired of Will’s constant insistence that Arthur was an arsehole and that Merlin needed to stand up for himself against Ian.
“You thought Ian was your friend,” Will reminded him.
“Well, I know that Arthur is,” Merlin said stubbornly. “Can we talk about something else, please?”
They spent the rest of the evening downstairs watching Gaius’s collection of Monty Python DVDs, laughing, and eating crisps. Just before Will walked out the door to head home he gathered Merlin into a big hug and squeezed Merlin once before letting him go.
“Have fun in London,” Will said, a half-smile on his face. “I hope for your sake that Arthur really does like you.”
“He’s my friend,” Merlin replied, rolling his eyes. He was so used to Will saying this sort of thing about Arthur that he didn’t bother to defend him. “Most friends like each other. I might make an exception for you, though.”
Will snickered. “That’s not what I mean.”
Merlin sighed. “I know.” He was quiet for a minute and then walked out the door with Will so that his mother, who was tidying up in the kitchen, couldn’t overhear their conversation.
“Alright, Merlin?” Will asked, looking concerned.
“I wish you didn’t know me so well,” Merlin muttered. “You know, I do try not to think about those things.”
“What things?” Will asked, clearly baffled.
“You know,” Merlin made some kind of indistinct hand gestures that seemed to confuse Will even more, “being anything other than friends with Arthur…or Ian.”
“Ian was a complete prick,” Will snapped. “He had no right…”
“That’s not what I mean.” Merlin sighed. “Look, do you ever think that maybe I don’t talk about that part of me for a reason?”
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Will said gently.
“I’m not ashamed!” Merlin protested. “I just don’t see why I have to talk about it.” He grinned as Will opened his mouth to argue and then Merlin just laughed, making Will look furious. “Will, I’m really not upset about being gay. It’s not that. It’s that I just don’t see what the big deal is. I shouldn’t have to tell people. You don’t have to tell people you like girls so why should I have to tell them I like…” he fumbled a minute, not sure if he should continue but he could see that Will was now looking incredibly pleased.
“Okay, Merlin, I’m sorry,” Will replied, grinning. “I just…well, after everything happened with Ian I thought that you hated yourself and that scared me.”
“That was over a year ago,” Merlin said. “Did you think I was going to jump off a bridge or something?”
Will shrugged. “I don’t know what I thought. I know that Ian’s lot are horrible to you.”
“I hate how they treat me,” Merlin said honestly. “Like I’m some kind of freak or pervert.” He sighed. “It hurts.”
“What about Arthur?” Will asked.
“He doesn’t know,” Merlin said, fidgeting a little. He hadn’t told Arthur for the same reason he’d just given Will, he shouldn’t have to tell anyone…
Will looked angry again and demanded, “Then how do you know he’s your friend? Merlin, you’re right, in a perfect world you wouldn’t have to tell anyone because no one would give a fuck. Unfortunately, we live in the real world. We live in a world where people are killed for being gay, where people’s families disown them.”
“My mum would never do that!” Merlin protested.
“Your mum knows,” Will retorted. He snickered at the indignant look on Merlin’s face. “No, I didn’t tell her! Besides, do you think she cares? Merlin, mate, she loves you. I think she just wants you to be happy.”
“I am happy,” Merlin replied. “I don’t really fancy these fights we keep having but I’m perfectly happy the rest of the time.”
They reached Will’s front door and he sighed. “Have fun in London.”
“I will.” Merlin turned to go but looked back when Will grabbed his arm. “Look, I don’t want to fight anymore.”
“Tell him,” Will said firmly. “It’s not worth living a lie with your friends.”
Merlin sighed but he nodded. “Fine.”
****
I’ll meet your train at Paddington. Don’t leave the station until I find you. Was the text Merlin woke up to at half past nine. Now it was nearly two and he was stepping off the train, his duffle bag slung over his shoulder as he made his way towards where Arthur was standing, his back to Merlin as he chatted on his mobile.
“We’ll meet you when we drop his stuff at my house,” Arthur was saying into the phone. He laughed. “No, don’t worry.”
“Arthur,” Merlin said, tapping his friend on the shoulder.
Arthur spun around and smiled in greeting at Merlin. “Alright, mate, I have to go. We’ll see you later.” He pocketed his phone and eyed Merlin. “Did you bring any good clothes?”
Merlin looked down at his black t-shirt, faded jeans, and old black trainers. “Er…I brought my normal clothes.”
Arthur rolled his eyes and muttered, more to himself than to Merlin, “You’re too skinny to fit into anything of mine.”
“Are we having tea with the Queen or something?” Merlin asked, trying not to laugh. “Who cares what I’m wearing.” After a moment he said, “I brought a button down.”
“Maybe I can lend you a jacket,” Arthur said, leading Merlin quickly towards the Tube. He chuckled when Merlin stumbled at the pace due to the added weight of his bag. “You’re such a girl,” Arthur teased, taking the duffle from Merlin and throwing it over his own shoulder. “Let’s go.”
When they reached Arthur’s home in Knightsbridge Merlin tried very hard not to gasp. The inside of the house was gorgeous and luxuriously decorated. Everything seemed to be in perfect order and Merlin couldn’t help but think how he shouldn’t be there. He had known that Arthur was wealthy but this was overwhelming and it made him feel out of place.
“Come on, then,” Arthur said, leading Merlin through the foyer and towards the stairs. “My room is upstairs, like yours.”
“This is nothing like mine,” Merlin protested as they walked up the stairs.
Arthur snorted. “Let’s drop your stuff. Leon and the others are waiting for us at the park.” He led Merlin towards a bedroom on the right.
“Who else is there?” Merlin asked. His eyes widened when they entered Arthur’s room. Arthur had a huge queen sized bed with red blankets, a desk, dresser, and a door that Merlin guessed led to his own bathroom.
Arthur dumped Merlin’s duffle unceremoniously onto the ground next to his bed. “Morgana, Gwen, Lance and Gwaine. I think Morgana’s friend Cenred was there for a bit.”
“Friend?” Merlin asked, grinning when Arthur rolled his eyes. “You must really like him.”
“He’s fine,” Arthur said shortly. “Ready?”
Merlin nodded and followed Arthur out of the house. “Why do I need nice clothes?”
“My uncle is taking us to dinner,” Arthur replied, directing Merlin down the street to his right.
“Oh.” Merlin thought of how posh Arthur’s house had been and he knew that they weren’t going for a curry or to the local chip place. “Somewhere posh?”
“Exactly,” Arthur muttered darkly. “He always does this whenever my father is out of town. I think he usually wants to take just Morgana but he can’t play favourites and leave me out.” He grinned. “She’d kill me if I left her with him.”
“Why?” Merlin asked. They had just entered Hyde Park and Merlin continued to follow Arthur.
“He’s a little strange,” Arthur conceded. “Nothing wrong with him, mind, he’s a great solicitor and my father likes him but he is odd.” He shrugged. “Anyway, he spends most of his time in Manchester but he’s come down for the weekend to visit a friend or something.”
“And to take you to dinner,” Merlin reminded him.
“No,” Arthur said, grinning a little evilly, “to take us to dinner.”
Merlin was about to protest that he didn’t have to go to dinner, he could surely stay behind, but then he heard someone yell his name and he broke into a huge grin. “Gwaine!”
Gwaine ran forwards and practically tackled Merlin pulling him into a huge hug. “It’s been ages!”
“Well, you could have come to Ealdor,” Merlin said, hugging Gwaine back. With his back to Arthur, Merlin didn’t notice that Arthur frowned or that his eyebrows knitted together crossly.
Gwaine ignored Arthur but let Merlin go, a grin still on his face. “Nah, mate, I was with my mum in Dublin for most of the year.” He jerked his head towards Arthur. “I saw the princess a few times, though, when I came to visit my granddad.”
“And your sister,” Arthur reminded him, ignoring the princess jibe, though his eyes were now dancing with laughter.
“Old toad,” Gwaine muttered.
“You found us!” Leon said, joining them at a more leisurely pace than Gwaine had. Lance, who had a football tucked under his arm, was with Leon as well as two girls Merlin had never met. “Alright, Merlin?”
Merlin grinned. “Hi, Leon.”
Lance dropped the football on the grass and threw an arm around Merlin. He pulled Merlin over to the girls. “Since Arthur seems to have forgotten his manners, I’ll introduce you.” He ignored Arthur’s protests about how the girls were perfectly capable of introducing themselves.
“It’s not the Dark Ages,” Arthur muttered.
Lance continued to ignore him, though he was grinning. “Merlin, this is Gwen,” he said, smiling at a pretty girl with brown skin and curly dark hair who smiled at both of them.
“I’m Morgana,” said the other girl. She smiled at Merlin and he thought that she was also incredibly pretty with her long black hair, creamy white skin, and light green eyes. “Arthur’s told me about you.”
Merlin’s eyes flicked to Arthur and he decided not to offer the same greeting to Morgana. The things Arthur had told him about Morgana had usually been unflattering and at her expense and he doubted she would appreciate it. “It’s nice to meet you.” He smiled at Gwen. “Both of you.”
“Where’s Cenred?” Arthur asked Morgana. He was absently toeing at the football, clearly wanting to play.
“He went home,” Morgana said with a shrug. “I’ll see him later.” At Arthur’s raised eyebrows Morgana snapped, “Oh shut up, Arthur.”
Arthur laughed and gently nudged the football towards Leon. “Let’s kick it around.”
“Alright,” said Lance, pulling the ball towards him with his foot and taking off in the opposite direction.
“Oi!” called Gwaine but he didn’t run after Lance as Leon and Arthur did. Instead, Gwaine turned to Merlin and the girls. “Shall we take a turn ’round the park?” he asked loftily, mock bowing and making the girls burst out laughing.
“I think we’re going to go to Harrods,” Morgana replied. “Do you want to come?”
Gwaine shook his head. “Shopping’s not really my thing.”
“See you both at dinner,” Merlin said as the girls turned to go.
“I won’t be there,” Gwen said, smiling slightly. “I’m going to my dad’s. I’ll see you after, though.”
“She has an excuse.” Morgana sighed. “Arthur’s dragging you along?” At Merlin’s jerky nod Morgana’s eyes softened. “It won’t be too bad. Leon will be there and he’s really good about Agravaine.” When Merlin still looked apprehensive she grinned and looked pointedly at Gwaine. “Maybe you can find an excuse of your own.”
Gwaine grinned. “Maybe he will.”
****
“You hate your sister,” Arthur argued when Gwaine informed him that he wanted to introduce her to Merlin that evening.
“Yeah,” Gwaine replied. “That’s why it’ll be great having Merlin there. He’ll be a good reason to leave quickly and meet back up at your place.”
“Why can’t Lance go with you? Merlin’s supposed to come to dinner with us.” Arthur was not happy that Gwaine was taking Merlin from him. Merlin was supposed to be his guest, not Gwaine’s. Besides, Gwaine was staying with him to avoid his sister!
“I’m going to see ‘Lion King’ with my parents,” Lance replied. “Sorry.”
“Well, why don’t you both come to dinner with us, then?” Arthur asked, crossing his arms. “Then we can all go visit your sister when we’re done.”
“No can do, mate,” Gwaine said with false remorse. “She doesn’t like you, told me not to bring you round anymore.”
Arthur rolled his eyes. “What makes you think she’ll like Merlin?” He ignored the glare on Merlin’s face.
“I’m counting on her not liking him,” Gwaine replied happily.
Merlin stared at him. “And what’s wrong with me, exactly?”
“Oh, nothing,” Gwaine said, chuckling when he realized that Merlin was actually offended. “You don’t want her to like you. She’s an evil old toad.”
Merlin laughed and shook his head. “Whatever.”
“How are you going to get her to dislike him?” Lance asked curiously. “Everyone likes Merlin.”
Merlin smiled at Lance. He was such a kind-hearted person and Merlin knew that Lance honestly believed what he’d said about Merlin to be true.
Gwaine, however, looked thoughtful at Lance’s words before saying, “Snog him, probably.”
“Excuse me?” Merlin sputtered. “I don’t think I agreed to that part.”
Arthur looked appalled while Lance and Leon just laughed.
“She hates seeing people kissing in public,” Gwaine said happily. “It’s why she doesn’t like you, Arthur. After she caught you and…”
“Aright!” Arthur said loudly, cutting Gwaine off and scowling furiously at him. He ignored Merlin’s curious look and Leon’s grin. “Enough! Take him to meet your sister.”
Gwaine looked triumphant. “Let’s go, Merlin.” He slung an arm around Merlin’s shoulders and led him away.
“Are we really going to meet your sister?” Merlin asked when they reached the Tube station. “Not that I don’t want to meet her of course.”
“No, you really don’t,” Gwaine said, laughing and going over to check the Tube map. “Don’t be ridiculous. She’s horrible.”
“Then where are we going?” Merlin felt his phone buzz in his pocket and he pulled it out to see he had a text from Arthur.
“We could do the Jack the Ripper tour,” Gwaine suggested. “It’s quite good.”
“I’m not that much of a tourist,” Merlin replied. “Let’s just grab food or something and walk around.”
“Sure,” Gwaine said. “I think a friend of mine might be having a party tonight, maybe we could stop by before going back to Arthur’s.”
Merlin shrugged, not sure he wanted to be out that late. He already felt a little guilty about abandoning Arthur so soon after arriving. Going to dinner with Arthur’s uncle really had seemed like too much, though. Merlin wasn’t sure he could have handled it. Thinking about Arthur, Merlin opened the text message Arthur had sent him a few minutes ago and stared at it dumbly.
Don’t let him kiss you.
“You coming?” Gwaine asked, noticing that Merlin was no longer behind him.
Merlin looked up from his phone and smiled brightly. “Yeah, sorry, lost in thought.”
****
“Don’t worry, Arthur will get over it,” Gwaine said later that night as they walked back to Arthur’s family’s house. “I think he was just frustrated that he couldn’t have another person there to help distract his uncle.”
“He said that his uncle’s a little odd.” Merlin followed Gwaine, trusting him to know where he was going. It was nearly eleven and Arthur had already texted both of them, demanding to know when they were coming back.
“He likes to give Arthur a hard time,” Gwaine said with a look at Merlin. “Always going on about how he’s not as good as his father. Loves Morgana, though.”
Merlin winced. “Maybe I should have gone.”
“Nah, I think it’s better that you came with me,” Gwaine said, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.
Merlin laughed. “Well, it does mean I didn’t have to wear anything of Arthur’s.”
Gwaine grinned. “Arthur won’t mind that you skipped out on dinner. He knows his uncle can be a wanker. I think he just was hoping that you’d want to go.”
“He had Leon and Morgana,” Merlin protested. “Why would he think I’d want to go to some fancy restaurant with his nasty uncle?” Merlin laughed. “That sounds awful.”
“Well, it’s definitely not as exciting as hearing about you snogging me in front of my sister,” Gwaine replied with a grin. “Should we still tell him that’s what we did?”
“I don’t think he wants to think of you kissing me,” Merlin replied dryly, thinking of the text Arthur had sent him earlier.
“Course he doesn’t,” Gwaine replied, chuckling. “Arthur’s a selfish arse.”
Merlin frowned. “I don’t belong to Arthur.”
“What?” Gwaine asked, looking confused.
“Just because I mainly see him during the school year doesn’t mean I’m his or anything,” Merlin clarified with a smile, though Gwaine looked even more confused at this. “I have people in my life other than Arthur, you know.”
Gwaine frowned. “Merlin, I don’t do that kind of thing.”
It was Merlin’s turn to look confused. “Huh?”
“I won’t tell Arthur,” Gwaine said, looking at Merlin almost sadly. “I think you should, though. He won’t be happy.”
“What?” Merlin demanded. “Does Arthur think he’s the only person in my life that I like to be with?”
“I think he does,” Gwaine snapped back.
Merlin’s stared at Gwaine as if he’d grown a second head. “What about my mum?”
“What about her?” Gwaine asked, confused again.
“Well, she’s important to me! I thought Arthur liked her too.” Merlin shook his head.
“I’m sure he does,” Gwaine replied, completely bewildered.
“And Lance and Leon and the rest of the Eton lot that I hang around with when I visit Arthur,” Merlin said. “What about them?”
“What about them?” Gwaine turned down Arthur’s street.
“I like being with them as well,” Merlin replied, looking suddenly exhausted. “I thought that was why Arthur introduced us. They’re his mates. Was I not supposed to like them?” He started wondering if maybe Will had been right, if Arthur only invited him over in order to show off his ‘commoner’ friend. “I like being with you and you’re impossible.”
Gwaine stopped suddenly and stared at Merlin. “When you’re with Arthur, what do you do?”
Merlin shrugged. “I don’t know. We watch DVDs, eat chips, and walk around Eton or Ealdor. He tried teaching me how to fence one time but I was rubbish. I think I prefer football and I’m pretty crap at that.”
Gwaine laughed. “Oh, Merlin.” He doubled over, guffawing. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t…”He was still laughing so hard it was difficult for him to talk.
Merlin stared at him. “Are you alright?”
When Gwaine finally got himself under control he just shook his head. “Never mind, forget everything I said.”
“Um…sure,” Merlin replied uncertainly. “You’re not going to yell at me again?” When Gwaine shook his head Merlin added, “I do think I’m allowed to have friends other than Arthur.”
Gwaine started laughing again. “I could snog you now. We don’t have to tell Princess.”
Merlin laughed. “No, I still don’t think Arthur would like it.”
“Suit yourself,” Gwaine replied impishly, wrapping an arm around Merlin’s shoulders and crossing the street to Arthur’s house. “Maybe I could kiss you in front of him?”
Merlin rolled his eyes. “I’d rather not make him angry.”
Gwaine grinned and rang the doorbell. “Yeah, he can be selfish, even when things don’t belong to him.”
“I just don’t want to shock him,” Merlin replied, chuckling.
Gwaine snorted. “Oh, believe me, that’s the last thing that would shock Arthur.”
Arthur threw the door open to see Merlin staring at Gwaine with confusion and Gwaine looking incredibly pleased with himself, his arm over Merlin’s shoulders. “What have you been doing?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.
“Not snogging,” Gwaine said, letting Merlin walk inside first.
Merlin rolled his eyes. “We just walked around and had dinner. London’s nice at night.”
Arthur nodded slowly. “How was Gwaine’s sister?”
“We er…” Merlin stopped, looking over to Gwaine.
“I figured,” Arthur said, sighing. “I’m going to sleep.” He looked at Gwaine. “Margaret put an AeroBed in the guest room for you. I think Leon might still be up, you two can fight over the regular bed.”
Merlin glanced at Gwaine who was frowning at Arthur’s back as he walked up the stairs to his bedroom. “I think he’s mad at me.”
Gwaine shook his head. “I don’t think so.” He sighed and headed to the left of the stairs to a room Merlin hadn’t noticed before. “See you in the morning.”
Merlin wasn’t sure he wanted to follow Arthur into his room if he was in a temper but he didn’t know what his other options were. He could see if he could room with Leon and Gwaine but all of his overnight things were up in Arthur’s room.
“Are you alright, dear?” asked a middle aged woman Merlin assumed must be Margaret, the Pendragon’s housekeeper.
“Oh, yes,” Merlin replied. “Thank you.” He smiled at her before deciding to go up to Arthur’s room and get his things. He would offer to stay in Gwaine and Leon’s room; the last thing he wanted was to have a fight with Arthur.
Merlin was feeling guilty when he opened the door to Arthur’s room. He shouldn’t have been such a coward and let Gwaine drag him off, he told himself. He’d come to visit Arthur, which meant spending time with Arthur even if it wasn’t something Merlin wanted to do.
“Merlin!” Arthur yelped, grabbing a pillow off of his bed and thrusting it in front of him. Merlin didn’t seem to have noticed but he had just barged into Arthur’s room when Arthur was in the middle of changing into his pyjama bottoms. “Can’t you knock?”
“Sorry,” Merlin said, startled out of his thoughts. He smirked at Arthur. “You don’t have anything I haven’t seen before.”
“That’s not the point,” Arthur sniped. “Turn around.”
Merlin laughed but did as he was told. “Maybe you should have locked the door.”
“Or you should have knocked,” Arthur argued. After a moment he said. “You can turn back around.”
Merlin shook his head at Arthur, who was now clothed in pyjama bottoms, and retrieved his duffle bag. “I can share with Gwaine and Leon, if you like.”
Arthur looked hurt but he covered it swiftly and nodded. “I can get Margaret to move the AeroBed up here. You can switch with Leon.”
“Are there any other of those beds?” Merlin asked, looking around and not noticing one for him in Arthur’s room.
“Yeah, we have another one, I think,” Arthur said slowly.
“Well, we could put it in there and then she wouldn’t have to bring it up the stairs. All three of us can fight over the comfortable bed.” He grinned at Arthur who just blinked at him.
“Leon would win,” Arthur commented after a moment.
Merlin shrugged. “I don’t mind using an AeroBed.” He wondered if Arthur was still angry with him for not going to dinner but all Arthur seemed to be was tired. “Are you alright, Arthur?”
“Yeah,” Arthur replied. “Do you want me to ask Margaret for that AeroBed? I can also just ask Leon to switch.”
Merlin thought back to the odd conversation he and Gwaine had had before they reached the house. “No, I think I’d rather have my own bed if I’m sharing a room with Gwaine.”
“What?” Arthur asked, looking surprised. “Is he not your type?”
Merlin felt like he’d been punched in the stomach and gaped at Arthur.
Arthur didn’t appear to notice Merlin’s silence and continued talking, “I thought that’s what took you so long.”
Merlin started laughing. “You twat.”
“Don’t call me a twat,” Arthur snapped, seeming to come out of whatever mood had taken him before. “You’re the one who lied to me about going to see Gwaine’s sister after I invited you to come stay at my family’s house for the week!”
Merlin looked ashamed. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” Arthur said, looking amused. “I don’t blame you. Leon reminded me that he didn’t particularly want to have dinner with Agravaine and that Morgana wasn’t going to make Gwen come even though Gwen is staying here too.” He shrugged. “I guess he thought it was unfair for me to make you go when you really didn’t have to.”
“Why is Gwen staying here when her dad lives in town?” Merlin asked, brushing off what he knew was the best apology he would get out of Arthur.
“She’s been at her father’s but the flat is tiny and her brother just came back from wherever he’s been for the last three years.” He sighed and looked at Merlin a little sadly. “He couldn’t handle it when their mother died and just ran off. I think that they were so happy Elyan’s back that they let him take the other bedroom. Gwen’s been on the couch for the last few days. When my father and Catrina left on their couple’s holiday, Morgana asked Gwen to stay until they come back next month.” He smiled bitterly. “My father doesn’t like for us to have friends over. I think he feels like guests take advantage of him. Anyway, that’s why we have all of you here now. Margaret likes when the house is full and she’s not going to tell him unless we set fire to the beds.”
Merlin snorted. “I’m not planning on doing that.”
“I should hope not,” Arthur replied. “I rather like this bed.”
“Are you angry with me?” Merlin asked, shifting his duffle bag to his other shoulder. It was getting heavy and if Arthur really wasn’t upset then Merlin wanted to set it down and get ready for bed.
“No,” Arthur replied. “Like I said, I understand. I was just hoping to have company.”
“Leon was with you,” Merlin pointed out.
Arthur chuckled. “I guess you’re right. You probably would have knocked over the wine or said something that make my uncle mad.”
Merlin glared at him. “I’m not that bad.”
“Keep lying to yourself,” Arthur said, pulling his blankets back and climbing into bed. “Turn the lights off when you’re finished, I’m going to sleep.”
Continue to Ch 5