LJI XI - 1: Resolution (~550 words)

[kehlen]

...and in the midst of her turmoil he sent a demon of his to tempt her. And came the demon, and stood it invisible by her side, and whispered it in her ear, soft as a breath of air, light as an inspiration, clear as the best of thoughts: ”It does not need to be so hard, you know. Your college department is pressing you so hard to publish another

Comments

[kehlen]

ConCrit is welcome.

The demons's voice is imaginary, but I could swear I heard it, the temptation was so vivid, so I let it sound. :-). The things fandoms (Good Omens, of course) do to you, haha!

[furzicle]

Perhaps you have mentioned what the topic of your dissertation is previously. But I realized that I have either forgotten or never knew. It s something I would be interested in hearing about.

Lovely imagery, by the way. Though when I have my conscience looking over my shoulder, I sense it is that heavy, ponderous weight in my stomach. Slightly guilty musings about the easy way around responsibilities usually feels like a nervous flutter that I try to bat away like a horde of mosquitoes.

[kehlen]

Normally, when I am trying to decide between the easy and the right way, I feel like the world around me narrows down to the question, compresses closer and closer and excludes more and more of my other interests and things I need to pay attention to

[static_abyss]

I like the flow of the thoughts in italics. It's got that ominous bible tone, so well done with the temptation apect of it.

[kehlen]

*happy dance*

I was aiming at exactly this kind of voice. So glad it sounds like I intended.

Thank you!

[i_love_freddie]

I love the opening.

[kehlen]

Thank you!

[roina_arwen]

I like the way you changed it to interweave the sections!

[kehlen]

Thank you. I am glad that it worked for you :)