Realization
Woo Sequel time...
A/N: Yay! It’s the sequel to Hidden Behind the Mask, but it can stand alone now that I think about it... I hadn’t even planned on a sequel, but the reactions I got to HBtM made me feel good, so, this is dedicated to everyone who reviewed/faved! I love you all and hope you enjoy!
Warning: YAOI!! Don’t like don’t read. Pronouns galore! Also it’s ItaNaru OOCness :( Itachi is a subborn bastard to write but I still love him, oh and Naru-chan goes a little...eh just read it!
Disclaimer: Alas I do NOT own Naruto, only this fanfic.
I’m lying on my bed in my room, simply staring at the ceiling, thinking. You haven’t shown up for a little over a week now, and it feels-strange. Your ever-constant presence here every night has become routine in my life and now without it, everything feels off. It’s beginning to catch up on me I think...not having someone here to help me take my mind off things.
Letting out a silent sigh, I get up and walk over to the window to gaze out it at the moon. It’s now about the time you usually show up, but I know you won’t, not tonight. I still remember everything; the way your lips felt against mine, the sound of your heartbeat, your calm and steady breathing. I vaguely wonder if Akatsuki sent you out on a mission and you died. I smile grimly at the thought; you’re too strong to die from a simple mission.
Another thought comes to me-what if you were sent to collect me? What if you refused and they killed you? Then I realized how foolish I was being, it wasn’t love we were feeling, simply lust. A craving. A desire. A need. Using each other we fulfill these impulses. However, it still doesn’t explain why I remember everything so vividly.
If it were truly lust I was feeling, then I wouldn’t crave your touch and only yours. I wouldn’t have this inexplicable urge to feel your lips against mine, to hear your heart beat. I wouldn’t want you to hold me in your arms as your heartbeat lulls me to sleep. Suddenly it hit me, as if someone had just stabbed me and I was just now realizing it-I was falling for you. I could hardly believe I was falling for the stoic Uchiha Itachi.
Everything that had happened was slowly luring me into feeling an emotion for another I haven’t felt in so long. Love.
I slid down the side of the window frame, now comfortably sitting on the windowsill, your usual spot when you show up. I rest my head on my knees as I try to make sense of everything. There was no way I could fall for you. I was starting to become hysterical. I didn’t notice that you had slipped into my room, passing by me without touching me.
“Naruto.” You call, and I vaguely realize that you face isn’t as impassive as it usually is; it’s twisted into an expression of concern. I vaguely realize that I’m shaking. You walk over to me slowly, every movement graceful.
Your cup my chin and tilt my head up. I gasped at all the emotions I could see in you eyes. Care, concern, and-no! I shook my head violently trying to assure myself it wasn’t true, that it couldn’t be true. I was horribly mistaken, and there was no way I just saw love in your eyes. Maybe it had always been there and I was too far into denial to acknowledge it.
I’m drawn out of my thoughts when you shake my shoulders, staring at me expectantly. I realize vaguely that you want me to speak. I don’t, instead my body shudders even more. Opening my mouth, I tilt my head back and let out a hysterical laugh. You’re probably thinking I’ve gone insane. Maybe I have, I don’t know anymore.
Strong, warms arms encircle me, and I can hear your heartbeat again, its steady and calming rhythm lulling me into a sense of security. Your lips are at my forehead and I hear you asking me what’s wrong and what happened. I let out a sigh and pull away.
“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong now?” You ask, your voice surprisingly calm.
“I just realized that I’m falling for you.” I said shaking my head, still disbelieving accompanied by another insane chuckled slipping from my lips. I glance up, expecting to see you glaring at me. Instead the edges on your lips are slightly turned upward and your eyes show…amusement?
I cock my head to the side, confused as to why you reacted as such. Apparently I forgot that you don’t like speaking much, as you move your face closer to mine and lay one hand on my cheek. Unable to control my actions, I lean into the touch as I always do.
“Hn. What took you so long to figure that out?” you murmur, your lips dangerously close to mine.
“Denial.” I reply before I close the small gap between our lips. In that kiss, there were so many emotions that were never before: passion, need, love. It went on for what seemed forever, and I realized I was running out of air, but I didn’t care at the moment. It lasted until we both were deprived of oxygen, practically gasping in large quantities of air at a time.
“So,” I start, suddenly remembering that you were gone for over a week. “What stopped you from coming here?”
Your face becomes slightly guarded, and it almost looks as though your debating on what you want to tell me.
“An Akatsuki mission.” You reply simply. I smirk knowing my guess was right, but know to not ask anymore about the topic. I walk over to my bed and sit on the edge. You lie down and lean against the pillows and grab my wrist pulling me over to lay my head on your chest and I lay between your legs.
Thump thump. Thump thump.
Your heartbeat is like my lullaby; it lets me know this is real and not a dream. I know you won’t be there in the morning, you never are. Your forehead is resting on the top of my head while your arms are encircling my waist. It’s comfortable like this. I feel safe. Protected. Loved, and I silently decided that it feels nice like this, laying in your arms. I also realize, I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Right before I fall asleep I wonder if you’ll be there in the morning. I didn’t know I had murmured it out loud and so I didn’t hear when you answered.
“Maybe, Naruto, maybe just this once. For now.”
A/N: Good? Bad? Hate it? Love it? Hate the sequel love the other? Review and let me know! And I have figured out how to enable anonymous reviews now! Yay! Ja ne! Keshra