(no subject)
i found this at some site and thought it was really funny
it's great to be a girl. why? because ...
Men will never appreciate chocolate like we appreciate chocolate.
Lycra.
We have more erogenous zones.
We're very comfortable with basic hygene practices.
Our genitals are prettier ... And we never get them caught in our flies.
We don't get spontaneous erections.
When we buy a vibrator, it's glamorous. When men buy blow-up dolls, it's sad.
Our orgasms last longer.
Guys never think we're leching at them when we stare at them in the gym. But we are.
We can use M.A.C. or other cosmetic goodies to help us out should we wake up looking like toss in the morning.
We don't have to get our strength up between sessions ... And it's much easier for us to get laid in the first place.
That moment you realised that you weren't "frigid", just physically repulsed by gobby men with bad breath and a problem with rejection.
We never ejaculate prematurely.
We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynaecological disorders. Beats the dentist every time on the scale of skiving excuses.
We got off Titanic first.
Circumcision isn't even an option.
We can wear power suits and stilettos and get called "ball busters" behind our backs.
We can do better stuff with our hair ... And we don't go bald after our 26th birthday.
We can wear open-toed sandals in the summer with no fear of social ostracism.
Wigs. We can wear them and be fashionable.
Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous. They look like complete dicks in ours.
Better pants.
We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
Who really controls the population?
We can cry to get off speeding fines.
We are more than capable of changing fuses. It's just that we have better things to do with our time.
We understand the true value of money. (More shoes and lipstick.)
We are statistically less likely to get caught when we have affairs.
Getting crushes.
Men still think they have to pay for our dinner (fools).
We always get a ring when we get engaged or married. (Which we can sell if it all goes sour.)
The thrill of surprising people by being good at darts ... and pool ... and football.
There's always a freebie "laydeez night" to be had when times are hard.
We live longer so we get to be cantakerous old biddies wearing inappropriate clothing and shouting at strangers.
Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
We know that computer games are fun, but don't believe that there is a direct correlation between our highest score and the size of our genitals.
Taxis stop for us.
We get drunk quicker, much cheaper.
It does not enhance our social standing to understand the workings of the offside trap (or any other wank football thing). But if we do we look incredibly cool.
You don't catch many girls driving tractors for a living.
Chick flicks.
Girls are much better dancers. Sorry. We just are.
"The future of rock belongs to women." (Kurt Cobain, 1994)
If we wanted to, we could be It girls and do nothing but go to parties all the time.
Drinking cocktails is strictly for girls.
We can wear pink without compromising our sexuality.
We can sit cross-legged.
Three small words - 'John', 'Wayne', and 'Bobbit'.
it's great to be a girl. why? because ...
Men will never appreciate chocolate like we appreciate chocolate.
Lycra.
We have more erogenous zones.
We're very comfortable with basic hygene practices.
Our genitals are prettier ... And we never get them caught in our flies.
We don't get spontaneous erections.
When we buy a vibrator, it's glamorous. When men buy blow-up dolls, it's sad.
Our orgasms last longer.
Guys never think we're leching at them when we stare at them in the gym. But we are.
We can use M.A.C. or other cosmetic goodies to help us out should we wake up looking like toss in the morning.
We don't have to get our strength up between sessions ... And it's much easier for us to get laid in the first place.
That moment you realised that you weren't "frigid", just physically repulsed by gobby men with bad breath and a problem with rejection.
We never ejaculate prematurely.
We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynaecological disorders. Beats the dentist every time on the scale of skiving excuses.
We got off Titanic first.
Circumcision isn't even an option.
We can wear power suits and stilettos and get called "ball busters" behind our backs.
We can do better stuff with our hair ... And we don't go bald after our 26th birthday.
We can wear open-toed sandals in the summer with no fear of social ostracism.
Wigs. We can wear them and be fashionable.
Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous. They look like complete dicks in ours.
Better pants.
We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
Who really controls the population?
We can cry to get off speeding fines.
We are more than capable of changing fuses. It's just that we have better things to do with our time.
We understand the true value of money. (More shoes and lipstick.)
We are statistically less likely to get caught when we have affairs.
Getting crushes.
Men still think they have to pay for our dinner (fools).
We always get a ring when we get engaged or married. (Which we can sell if it all goes sour.)
The thrill of surprising people by being good at darts ... and pool ... and football.
There's always a freebie "laydeez night" to be had when times are hard.
We live longer so we get to be cantakerous old biddies wearing inappropriate clothing and shouting at strangers.
Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
We know that computer games are fun, but don't believe that there is a direct correlation between our highest score and the size of our genitals.
Taxis stop for us.
We get drunk quicker, much cheaper.
It does not enhance our social standing to understand the workings of the offside trap (or any other wank football thing). But if we do we look incredibly cool.
You don't catch many girls driving tractors for a living.
Chick flicks.
Girls are much better dancers. Sorry. We just are.
"The future of rock belongs to women." (Kurt Cobain, 1994)
If we wanted to, we could be It girls and do nothing but go to parties all the time.
Drinking cocktails is strictly for girls.
We can wear pink without compromising our sexuality.
We can sit cross-legged.
Three small words - 'John', 'Wayne', and 'Bobbit'.