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WARNING: LONG ASS RANT ABOUT THE IDIOCIES AND LOW-STANDARD, LACKING-OF-MORALS THAT MAKE UP SOME PEOPLE I HAVE COME INTO CONTACT WITH AND HAVE ALLOWED TO BE CALLED FRIEND, IF ONLY FOR A SHORT WHILE
So I just removed a friend from my life because of all the lying and two-faced bullshit that she was throwing at not only me, but other friends in her life, simply for the attention it would bring her. I see things like this, instances like this, and I shake my head. Am I the only one who will not put up with this sort of behavior? I have removed three people from my life within the past two and a half years and I wonder; why? These people are supposed to be my friends, the people I trust, and I find myself having to disengage myself from them. Why?
Lying, cheating, and the selfish ways of some people is beyond me. Why should I remain friends with someone who doesn't want to remain friends with me? Why should I put forth all of my loyalty, my trust, my faith into that person when I am getting nothing in return? Why should I waste my time being there for you when you're never there for me, when you use my pain against me, and to my disadvantage?
I've been lead on too many times in my life by those I put my love and trust into. I'm done being the naive individual who thinks everything is fine and then finds out by someone else that in fact, it isn't.
1. I've been made to believe that a friend of mine was dead, and I mourned for two days because of it. It couldn't be true, how could she be snatched so suddenly from us? And at such a young age? Little did I know that this feeling was more then just denial, but also intuition. A month or so later I was informed that she was still alive, that it was a stupid ploy to see which friends really cared about her. I demanded an explanation at once; what were your reasons? How could you do this? There are plenty of people in this world who feel they cannot trust the people in their lives as much as they should, but none of them are feigning death to prove it. And then recently she tried to convince her friends that she was currently hospitalized for slicing her wrists. Intuition screamed at me that it was a lie, and wouldn't you know it, today she's as happy as can be. Good-bye. She refuses to explain anything to me, refuses to clear up any misunderstandings, though I already know the truth about her situation. A child deprived of attention can do stupid things.
2. I've been made to believe everything was fine, that we were as close as could be. A childhood friendship that would live on through the ages. And then a simple relationship seemed to shatter it all. He was taken away from us by her constant-need for attention. Practices were interrupted, canceled and no longer seen as something to take seriously. Lies swarmed their relationship, and it was hard for me to decide who's side (if I even should) to take in certain situations, and who I should be mad at. Soon emotions became too much, I was angry at them both, but seemed to forget my anger and frustration with their immaturity when around them because of how happy they seemed (usually apart). I was just glad to have my friends back. And then it started again, and after other people getting involved in my life, I made a move that turned that individual against me. I was the enemy, I was the bitch, I had no right to defend myself against someone who had no right to get themselves tangled in my life or the life of my friends. My actions were in no way meant to hurt or harm my friend, who had before agreed in my reasoning and anger at the invasion of privacy. The back-stabbing tendencies of this individual have never ceased to amaze me, and the lies that were created and thrown in my face. "You used me for my car" I have my own car, I don't need yours. "You had no right to say this or that." I had every right. You've even agreed with me. Why change your mind now? Do you really think I was going to forgive you New Years when you wanted to be friends again? Fuck you. So I can put up with your bullshit a fourth time? Sorry I don't think so.
3. I didn't think anything in the world could tear our friendship apart. We got along so well, and you were so funny and clever that I followed you around like a lost puppy. You turned me against people I used to care about, people I, looking back now, were better friends to me then you ever were. I never challenged anything you said because I trusted you; why would you lie to me? Then along the lines I started to open my eyes and really see your true colors. Things you said didn't make sense, I started to doubt the claims you made on people. How could I be so stupid and not see this before? "Rob used her for sex" - "Kiah has a hairy chest" - "Amanda is a bitch who stopped talking to me for no reason". Things like this started to eat away at my mind, and I started to wonder why these people would act this way, or have these outrageous problems. The over-exaggerated lies, the smudged truth, anything to keep me in the dark, to turn me against people, to keep me from getting some things I wanted. "Used me for my mom" "Used me for my food." Get over yourself, how ridiculous do you sound? The reduced amount of stress in my life since the removal of this individual has been so significant. I'm no longer overwhelmed by bouts of depression that lasted up to weeks, I'm confident in myself, I feel good about myself, I trust my friends and love them despite the things that were said about them, despite how I would go along with it to make her happy. I'm no longer constantly wondering if she's mad at me, or tense, or worried about what she's saying behind my back, or what she's really thinking. That weight has been lifted from shoulders graciously.
I'm now currently engaged to the man I love and know I will spend the rest of my life with despite the hard time we have. I don't care about the stupid rumors said to try and stain my "image" or my personal being. I know how I am, I know my true friends know how I am, and those who would question where I stand are not true friends of mine. Lies no longer stress me out (though I may be frustrated by the stupidity of it and the stupidity of those who believe it), because that person means nothing to me. Once they're gone I wont even have their face to remind me of how ugly and disgusting and vile they are on the inside. Good riddance. I have my friends, I have the people who love me, and the man who will always be there for me through the good and bad. You can say all you want, you can lie and cheat all you want, but you will never take that away from me. You will never make me as miserable as you once did. You will never drag me down with you. Never.
I am done with the people who are not worth my trust, loyalty and friendship.
I care for my friends and they will never get anything short of the best from me.
So I just removed a friend from my life because of all the lying and two-faced bullshit that she was throwing at not only me, but other friends in her life, simply for the attention it would bring her. I see things like this, instances like this, and I shake my head. Am I the only one who will not put up with this sort of behavior? I have removed three people from my life within the past two and a half years and I wonder; why? These people are supposed to be my friends, the people I trust, and I find myself having to disengage myself from them. Why?
Lying, cheating, and the selfish ways of some people is beyond me. Why should I remain friends with someone who doesn't want to remain friends with me? Why should I put forth all of my loyalty, my trust, my faith into that person when I am getting nothing in return? Why should I waste my time being there for you when you're never there for me, when you use my pain against me, and to my disadvantage?
I've been lead on too many times in my life by those I put my love and trust into. I'm done being the naive individual who thinks everything is fine and then finds out by someone else that in fact, it isn't.
1. I've been made to believe that a friend of mine was dead, and I mourned for two days because of it. It couldn't be true, how could she be snatched so suddenly from us? And at such a young age? Little did I know that this feeling was more then just denial, but also intuition. A month or so later I was informed that she was still alive, that it was a stupid ploy to see which friends really cared about her. I demanded an explanation at once; what were your reasons? How could you do this? There are plenty of people in this world who feel they cannot trust the people in their lives as much as they should, but none of them are feigning death to prove it. And then recently she tried to convince her friends that she was currently hospitalized for slicing her wrists. Intuition screamed at me that it was a lie, and wouldn't you know it, today she's as happy as can be. Good-bye. She refuses to explain anything to me, refuses to clear up any misunderstandings, though I already know the truth about her situation. A child deprived of attention can do stupid things.
2. I've been made to believe everything was fine, that we were as close as could be. A childhood friendship that would live on through the ages. And then a simple relationship seemed to shatter it all. He was taken away from us by her constant-need for attention. Practices were interrupted, canceled and no longer seen as something to take seriously. Lies swarmed their relationship, and it was hard for me to decide who's side (if I even should) to take in certain situations, and who I should be mad at. Soon emotions became too much, I was angry at them both, but seemed to forget my anger and frustration with their immaturity when around them because of how happy they seemed (usually apart). I was just glad to have my friends back. And then it started again, and after other people getting involved in my life, I made a move that turned that individual against me. I was the enemy, I was the bitch, I had no right to defend myself against someone who had no right to get themselves tangled in my life or the life of my friends. My actions were in no way meant to hurt or harm my friend, who had before agreed in my reasoning and anger at the invasion of privacy. The back-stabbing tendencies of this individual have never ceased to amaze me, and the lies that were created and thrown in my face. "You used me for my car" I have my own car, I don't need yours. "You had no right to say this or that." I had every right. You've even agreed with me. Why change your mind now? Do you really think I was going to forgive you New Years when you wanted to be friends again? Fuck you. So I can put up with your bullshit a fourth time? Sorry I don't think so.
3. I didn't think anything in the world could tear our friendship apart. We got along so well, and you were so funny and clever that I followed you around like a lost puppy. You turned me against people I used to care about, people I, looking back now, were better friends to me then you ever were. I never challenged anything you said because I trusted you; why would you lie to me? Then along the lines I started to open my eyes and really see your true colors. Things you said didn't make sense, I started to doubt the claims you made on people. How could I be so stupid and not see this before? "Rob used her for sex" - "Kiah has a hairy chest" - "Amanda is a bitch who stopped talking to me for no reason". Things like this started to eat away at my mind, and I started to wonder why these people would act this way, or have these outrageous problems. The over-exaggerated lies, the smudged truth, anything to keep me in the dark, to turn me against people, to keep me from getting some things I wanted. "Used me for my mom" "Used me for my food." Get over yourself, how ridiculous do you sound? The reduced amount of stress in my life since the removal of this individual has been so significant. I'm no longer overwhelmed by bouts of depression that lasted up to weeks, I'm confident in myself, I feel good about myself, I trust my friends and love them despite the things that were said about them, despite how I would go along with it to make her happy. I'm no longer constantly wondering if she's mad at me, or tense, or worried about what she's saying behind my back, or what she's really thinking. That weight has been lifted from shoulders graciously.
I'm now currently engaged to the man I love and know I will spend the rest of my life with despite the hard time we have. I don't care about the stupid rumors said to try and stain my "image" or my personal being. I know how I am, I know my true friends know how I am, and those who would question where I stand are not true friends of mine. Lies no longer stress me out (though I may be frustrated by the stupidity of it and the stupidity of those who believe it), because that person means nothing to me. Once they're gone I wont even have their face to remind me of how ugly and disgusting and vile they are on the inside. Good riddance. I have my friends, I have the people who love me, and the man who will always be there for me through the good and bad. You can say all you want, you can lie and cheat all you want, but you will never take that away from me. You will never make me as miserable as you once did. You will never drag me down with you. Never.
I am done with the people who are not worth my trust, loyalty and friendship.
I care for my friends and they will never get anything short of the best from me.