SPN RB '2019: ⛄You and I, Lost to the Winter⛄
title card
(Please do not repost or alter. At the very least, please give me credit.)
| SPN ReverseBang | Story Link | LJ Master Post |
Illustrator: kirathehyrulian
Author: youaregonecas
Title: You and I, Lost to the Winter
Word Count: 10644
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Pairings: Gen
Additional Tags: Temporary Character Death, Grief, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Magic Tricks, Zanna (Supernatural), Car Accident, Survivor Guilt
Summary: When a car crash takes Sam’s life, Dean thinks he’s lost his brother for good. Not long after, though, he’s visited by a Zanna that has taken on Sam’s form, and together they have to undertake the journey of growing up, growing, and learning how to let go and forgive.
For more art from me please check out my “myart” tag here on Tumblr.
👇(Artist Notes, Spoilers, and RB submission under the cut:)👇
Artist Notes:
So, just in case you don’t know what a Reverse Bang is, it’s where an artist draws an illustration and an interested writer picks it to write a story inspired by the work. More goes into the process, but that’s pretty much the gist of it.
Title Card:
The title card was made when my author was a little more than halfway through their story, so it lines up more with the story's feel. The story is bittersweet and during the winter. So, I made the title card blue and gray for an angsty, dead-silence feel. The magic tricks are Zanna!Sam's trademark, so the image has cards, streamers, balls, and confetti. It's supposed to be bittersweet. Innocent fun, but shadowed/overlaid by death and depression.
my rb art submission: The Child Zanna and the Sad Man
Scene 1:
The title of this work was called: “The Child Zanna and the Sad Man.“ It was my second submission to the SPN RB this year. And, I totally had an idea going forward with this one, but at the same time knew that I should not stifle my author’s creativity wanted to or tell them how to storytell. So, these were ideas I had, but none of it was set in stone. It was up to the author if they wanted to use them. The only thing that my author had to abide by was my non-negotiable creativity wanted “Do Not Wants,” (which were: No underage with child-Zanna!Sam, no character bashing, no scat, and no Destiel, please) and if there had to be pairings involved, it could be wincest, but otherwise the story needed to be Gen.
The Supernatural Wiki's section on Zanna says,
" Zanna are children ina type of creature that act as guides and guardian angels to children in need of them. They do so under the guise of being a child's imaginary friend for as long as the child needs them, but once the child no longer needs them, the Zanna leaves and moves on to another child. The four known Zanna so far take on humanoid forms, possibly to appease the child. Each one has a unique ability and attribute, such as Sparkle having sparkly blood. They are very docile and do not wish to cause harm to others, much less to one of their own. They are playful, patient, very caring, and full of wisdom and knowledge, making them very suitable for kids[...] Their sole purpose is to guide children and it appears they only choose human children."
While I was drawing this work I was thinking of how I definitely wanted this story to be Sam and Dean centric. And, I really wanted it to be Gen. But I’d accept Wincest.
I envisioned that Dean had permanently lost Sam and is mourning him in a functioning yet downward spiraling way. And, Sam, in the desire to stay behind with his brother (whether by a deal, fluke, break in the universe, or something) got turned into a Zanna. Sam's memories of his past life are gone, and now he has the mind and mission of a Zanna. Zanna!Sam (even though Dean is not a child) has chosen Dean as his child to guide until Dean says that he doesn't need Sam anymore (I didn’t want them separated at the end, but I was fine with the story having Dean say he doesn't need Sam "as a Zanna" anymore).
Zanna!Sam has taken on the form of his child self to cater to Dean’s sensibility and comfort. He's a clown version of his child self because Dean likes funny things (and I wanted Dean to be caught off guard by it). And, Sam's unique ability is magic tricks (if the author wanted to make his attribute a little out of control due to demon blood tainting his soul or because he's not supposed to be a Zanna, I'm was game).
I intended for a lot of hurt/comfort in this story. I'm wasn't looking for the codependency between Sam and Dean to be fixed. I wanted the main idea going forward to be that Dean is on a journey to find out that he is worthy, and Sam is guiding him to that answer. Now Dean might think he's on the journey to fix/bring back his brother, but this story is more of Zanna!Sam teaching Dean about of all the good he did in the world, all the good he should be allowed to enjoy just as much as anyone else, and how he is every part of the hero Sam has looked up to his entire life, even if Sam doesn't remember everything now. (And, maybe Sam starts remembering things little by little throughout their journey! Idk)
Extra thoughts:
I wasn’t able to do anything extra, extra. But, I did say that I wasn’t willing to make more art in the beginning. Mostly because I figured I probably wouldn’t have enough time. I didn’t want my author to get their hopes up, and I was right to do so.
I really did not have enough brainpower and motivation to push through everything that was going at this point of the year to draw anything extra. I was going through a major burnt out period. End of semesters do that to me. But, I did do a title card, and I’m proud of it. Plus, I think artists were under no obligation to make cover art specifically, so I guess that counts as an extra.
I’m glad I could help inspire someone to art because of what I made. The act of spreading creativity is an awesome thing to be apart of.♥
I don't really remember any specific music that I listened to during this one, so I have no music to share here.