What Happened to the Bread?: An April Fool's Day Mystery

[kiri_moth]

I bought a shiny new loaf of cinnamon challah! If you've never had it, challah is an egg bread, basically the same thing as brioche. It's soft and fluffy and slightly sweet and super delicious.

Comments

[blythechild]

Wait... dog hair??? That housekeeper is eeeeeeeeee-viiiiiiiiiiiiiil.

[kiri_moth]

Fo' reals!!!!!

I'm guessing that she left the gate to the kitchen open and the dog got in and got the challah, and she tried to hide it by putting it back in the bag. SO NO ONE WOULD BE THE WISER.

[blythechild]

She must have something on your employers to keep them from firing her... *shakes head in disbelief*

[kiri_moth]

I just don't even know anymore. I thought she was gone after the last incident which involved her bringing over a primative African(?) fertility figure with a giant penis on a spring and leaving it prominently on the mantel in the living room (she likes to bring strange things over and they already have a collection of nice things from Africa above the fireplace)

But no.

However, I'm beginning to think that I could probably never get fired either. So next time the children get on my nerves I'm going to sell them to roving gypsies in exchange for maaaagic potions.

[defiler_wyrm]

Horrifying. Who the hell puts bread back looking like that?!? I mean WTFH is the thought process behind something like that? "Oh hey bread that's not mine AURM NARM NARM NARM AUHHGHGHLGLGLHLHLLHLL oh crap the dog took the half I didn't devour and ran outside with it! Drop that, you dog! Okay dog dropped the bread in the dirt. WHAT DO. ... ... I'D BETTER SAVE IT FOR LATER SO OTHER PEOPLE CAN HAVE THE REST OF THIS TASTY DIRTBREAD."

[kiri_moth]

I haven't the foggiest! But it's so much better than when she drank all of the lemonade-made-with-actual-lemons in the fridge and replaced it by filling the bottle with nasty powdered mix lemonade. LIKE NO ONE WOULD NOTICE THE DIFFERENCE.

She also drinks our alcohol.

[redvelvetaddict]

THIS IS THE SADDEST POST
LOOK AT THAT SAD BREAD :CCCC

[kiri_moth]

SO SAD AND SMUSHED! WHY WON'T ANYONE JUST PUT HIM OUT OF HIS BREADY MISERY!

[maevemacaraab]

That is the cutest loaf of challah bread! :D

[kiri_moth]

Thanks! It was super cute before it was furry. :C

[catharsis_]

is putting butter on that(much less dog hair)kosher?

j/k great bread and cute drawings.

[kiri_moth]

I would say that logic argues yes, because though they contains eggs, and eggs are technically meat, eggs (and poultry) shouldn't be considered meat in terms of kashrut. Birds don't lactate so that whole 'mother's milk' thing is moot.

But I know that's not how religion works.

Good thing I'm a non-religious Jew! I just like cinnamon challah. With butter. :3

[kiri_moth]

Pigeon crop-milk butter would certainly fucking not be kosher. Where is my dryheaving forever emoticon? :6