Every loss is grievous, no matter the circumstances. I know you will be holding each other gently through these hard times. I will be thinking of all of you and holding you in the light.
I wish that this sort of thing didn't leave me feeling as though I don't want to contribute to more condolence fatigue (as well as contributing to my own). It's hard and I miss you (plural) and I wish you strength to get through it and all the comfort that you need.
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