Metaphors
Title: Metaphors
Chapter: one-shot
Author: kiroyo
Genre: Humour, Crack
Warnings: None.
Disclaimer: I own this page of lies.
Rating: G
Pairing: Ruki x ?, Aoi x Uruha, Reita x Kai
Synopsis: Ruki's new lyrics.
You're the missing piece to my puzzle, Ruki wrote.
Aoi leaned over and peered into his notebook. Since when did he write such lyrics for the band!? They were never teen pop R&B!
"Spit it out."
Ruki dumped his pen and clapped the small book shut. "What? My chewing gum!? No!" His eyes were opened wide, horrified.
"I meant that metaphorically." Aoi said dryly. "And to think you're the lyricist of our band. So who is it?"
Clearly embarrassed, Ruki rummaged through his bag, pretending to look for his packet of cigarettes.
But Uruha came waltzing in with that said item in his hand. "Thanks Ruki!" he said cheerily, tossing it to the stunned vocalist. Ruki clutched the box in his hands and blinked.
"Oh Uruha, you're the missing piece to my puzzle!" Aoi declared. He scrambled out of the sofa and kneeled down in front of Uruha on one knee, serenading him like a maiden. Uruha laughed. "I know! But what was that for?"
A cruel shudder went down Ruki's spine when he saw an all too familiar sparkle in Aoi's eyes.
"That's the key line of lyrics to our new song."
"Really!?" Uruha gasped. "That's like saying... I'm the eyebrows to your face."
Ruki sniggered. Up till now, Uruha hadn't gotten over Aoi's caterpillar saga. How could he? Neither of them nor the fans could. It was that epic.
Rolling his eyes, Aoi said, "Then I'm the purple shorts to your thighs."
Uruha huffed and crossed his arms. This was starting to get out of line. Fortunately, Aoi sensed it immediately.
"You're the pick to my guitar!"
That made Uruha grin. He pondered for a few seconds before answering, "You're the amplifier to my solo!"
"You're the deodorant to my armpit!"
"You're the trashcan to my rubbish!"
"You're the toilet paper to my shit!"
"You're the sanitary pad to my panties!"
Only Ruki heard a small click amidst the buzz of steadily grosser absurdities. Their bassist and drummer strolled in.
"What's with all this hype?" Reita asked. "Yeah, I thought I heard some strange things outside." Kai replied, moving to the cabinet to retrieve his drumsticks.
Uruha pranced over and clapped his hands. "Come join us!"
The pair who just entered the studio looked at each other then back at the two guitarists.
"It's simple. Reita, what's Kai to you?" egged Aoi. Uruha bounced on his feet, excited for his best friend's answer.
Reita turned to Kai and stared at him earnestly. "You're the noseband to my nose."
Ruki snorted and Aoi gagged. That was so... Reita. But he shrugged. "That works too I guess."
"You're the rhythm to my beat." Kai chirped in return, smiling and flashing his dimple in all its glory.
Uruha d’awwed and scooted over next to him, squealing and squeezing Kai with his long arms until Kai’s face turned blue and Reita stepped in to intervene.
"You're the cock to my anus!" Uruha sang as he let go of the breathless drummer who collapsed into Reita’s arms, and winked at Aoi.
Ruki choked. "What!?" But that only made Aoi grin smugly.
"Oh Ruki, I never knew you had this side to you! You should write more of such lyrics! Look at how much fun we're having 'cause of it!" Uruha sighed happily, lolling his head to rest on Aoi's shoulder.
Pissed off, Ruki grabbed his bag and started towards the door. "You guys suck."
Raising an eyebrow, Aoi wound his arm around Uruha's waist. "Oh we do alright."
The corners of Uruha's eyes narrowed and he simpered. "Every. Night."
Placing his index on Uruha’s lips, Aoi begun, "You're the lips to my-"
Ruki groaned and slammed the door. Loud retreating footsteps followed after, leaving 3 amused band mates behind.
Aoi smirked. Oh this was so not over yet.
A/N: In an extremely happy mood today :D And I decided to clump these nonsensical fics together like the coffee/café ones since I realise I have a couple more of these rubbish-in-gazette's-studio things.
A/A/N: The middle 4 lines are non-fiction and took place in real life yesterday.
Chapter: one-shot
Author: kiroyo
Genre: Humour, Crack
Warnings: None.
Disclaimer: I own this page of lies.
Rating: G
Pairing: Ruki x ?, Aoi x Uruha, Reita x Kai
Synopsis: Ruki's new lyrics.
You're the missing piece to my puzzle, Ruki wrote.
Aoi leaned over and peered into his notebook. Since when did he write such lyrics for the band!? They were never teen pop R&B!
"Spit it out."
Ruki dumped his pen and clapped the small book shut. "What? My chewing gum!? No!" His eyes were opened wide, horrified.
"I meant that metaphorically." Aoi said dryly. "And to think you're the lyricist of our band. So who is it?"
Clearly embarrassed, Ruki rummaged through his bag, pretending to look for his packet of cigarettes.
But Uruha came waltzing in with that said item in his hand. "Thanks Ruki!" he said cheerily, tossing it to the stunned vocalist. Ruki clutched the box in his hands and blinked.
"Oh Uruha, you're the missing piece to my puzzle!" Aoi declared. He scrambled out of the sofa and kneeled down in front of Uruha on one knee, serenading him like a maiden. Uruha laughed. "I know! But what was that for?"
A cruel shudder went down Ruki's spine when he saw an all too familiar sparkle in Aoi's eyes.
"That's the key line of lyrics to our new song."
"Really!?" Uruha gasped. "That's like saying... I'm the eyebrows to your face."
Ruki sniggered. Up till now, Uruha hadn't gotten over Aoi's caterpillar saga. How could he? Neither of them nor the fans could. It was that epic.
Rolling his eyes, Aoi said, "Then I'm the purple shorts to your thighs."
Uruha huffed and crossed his arms. This was starting to get out of line. Fortunately, Aoi sensed it immediately.
"You're the pick to my guitar!"
That made Uruha grin. He pondered for a few seconds before answering, "You're the amplifier to my solo!"
"You're the deodorant to my armpit!"
"You're the trashcan to my rubbish!"
"You're the toilet paper to my shit!"
"You're the sanitary pad to my panties!"
Only Ruki heard a small click amidst the buzz of steadily grosser absurdities. Their bassist and drummer strolled in.
"What's with all this hype?" Reita asked. "Yeah, I thought I heard some strange things outside." Kai replied, moving to the cabinet to retrieve his drumsticks.
Uruha pranced over and clapped his hands. "Come join us!"
The pair who just entered the studio looked at each other then back at the two guitarists.
"It's simple. Reita, what's Kai to you?" egged Aoi. Uruha bounced on his feet, excited for his best friend's answer.
Reita turned to Kai and stared at him earnestly. "You're the noseband to my nose."
Ruki snorted and Aoi gagged. That was so... Reita. But he shrugged. "That works too I guess."
"You're the rhythm to my beat." Kai chirped in return, smiling and flashing his dimple in all its glory.
Uruha d’awwed and scooted over next to him, squealing and squeezing Kai with his long arms until Kai’s face turned blue and Reita stepped in to intervene.
"You're the cock to my anus!" Uruha sang as he let go of the breathless drummer who collapsed into Reita’s arms, and winked at Aoi.
Ruki choked. "What!?" But that only made Aoi grin smugly.
"Oh Ruki, I never knew you had this side to you! You should write more of such lyrics! Look at how much fun we're having 'cause of it!" Uruha sighed happily, lolling his head to rest on Aoi's shoulder.
Pissed off, Ruki grabbed his bag and started towards the door. "You guys suck."
Raising an eyebrow, Aoi wound his arm around Uruha's waist. "Oh we do alright."
The corners of Uruha's eyes narrowed and he simpered. "Every. Night."
Placing his index on Uruha’s lips, Aoi begun, "You're the lips to my-"
Ruki groaned and slammed the door. Loud retreating footsteps followed after, leaving 3 amused band mates behind.
Aoi smirked. Oh this was so not over yet.
A/N: In an extremely happy mood today :D And I decided to clump these nonsensical fics together like the coffee/café ones since I realise I have a couple more of these rubbish-in-gazette's-studio things.
A/A/N: The middle 4 lines are non-fiction and took place in real life yesterday.