(no subject)
*edit: i just realized how long this is*
CarrieS529: put up a new away message
Auto response from kirsten598: Two cows in England are talking to one another. the first one says, "Hey, are you worried about getting that mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "I'm not a cow, I'm a helicopter!"
CarrieS529 returned at 12:33:19 PM.
CarrieS529: i've grown tired of this one
Auto response from kirsten598: if my name were carrie i would kill myself.
CarrieS529: thats better
CarrieS529: thank you for your cooperation
Auto response from kirsten598: Two fish were in a tank. One turns to the other and asks, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
CarrieS529: haha
Auto response from kirsten598: What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh
CarrieS529: that is amusing as well
Auto response from kirsten598: Once upon a time there were two muffins in the microwave. Suddenly, on of the muffins says:
"Man it's hot in here!!!!"
The other muffin exclaims,
"Look a talking muffin!!!!"
CarrieS529: but that muffin can talk too, so why would he be surprised by a talking muffin?
Auto response from kirsten598: How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
CarrieS529: that is one of lifes great mysteries
Auto response from kirsten598: Two snowmen are standing in a field. One says to the other : "Funny, I smell carrots too".
CarrieS529: all fields smell like carrots, duh
Auto response from kirsten598: If the speed of light is 299'792'458 m/s, then what's the speed of dark?
CarrieS529: 344,567,231.869 m/s
Auto response from kirsten598: WHAT DO YOU CALL CHEESE THAT ISN'T YOURS? NACHO CHEESE
CarrieS529: but i control all of the worlds cheese supply, so it is always my cheese
Auto response from kirsten598: Why don't aliens eat clowns.
Because they taste funny.
CarrieS529: i find that they are not too bad with a little soy sauce
Auto response from kirsten598: I'm rooting for the crocodile, I hope he swallows your friends whole.
CarrieS529: me too
CarrieS529: come on now, keep up
Auto response from kirsten598: A magician was driving down the road..then he turned into a drive way...
CarrieS529: why yes, he's here now. i see his car
Auto response from kirsten598: Some things are worth dying for.... like broccoli ;-)
CarrieS529: yes, that is why the great broccoli war of 1989 was such a success
Auto response from kirsten598: It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, an Angel gets set on fire.
CarrieS529: haha, serves em right, those damn angels
Auto response from kirsten598: Clay Aiken is underground.
CarrieS529: yes, he lives among the mole people
Auto response from kirsten598: You're not as green as you are cabbage looking.
CarrieS529: i do think i was looking a bit cabbagey today
Auto response from kirsten598: There is more than one way to skin a cat, as you know, but the worst is to bore a tiny hole into the tip of the cat's tail, through which one attempts to extract the inner animal with a vacuum cleaner.
CarrieS529: really, cuz i find that works quite well
Auto response from kirsten598: even jesus hates creed.
CarrieS529: no argument there
Auto response from kirsten598: Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see.
CarrieS529: yes, that can be quite terrifying
Auto response from kirsten598: elephants are contagious.
CarrieS529: i know, theres a case of elephant going around here
Auto response from kirsten598: sometimes a cake in the shape of a ferret is the best treat.
CarrieS529: mmm... ferret shaped cake
Auto response from kirsten598: What can't be custard must be endured.
CarrieS529: you must have a lot of endurance to endure custard
Auto response from kirsten598: Your makeup looks so great next to his teeth
CarrieS529: i know, it matches his skin tone perfectly
Auto response from kirsten598: he's fat and he don't run too fast but he's faster than me.
CarrieS529: haha, you suck
Auto response from kirsten598: Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips overs, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
CarrieS529: damn ice weasels
CarrieS529: do do do do do do do, do do do do, doo do do do do do
Auto response from kirsten598: i'm bored with this...go away.
CarrieS529: ok
CarrieS529 is away at 12:45:17 PM.
CarrieS529: put up a new away message
Auto response from kirsten598: Two cows in England are talking to one another. the first one says, "Hey, are you worried about getting that mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "I'm not a cow, I'm a helicopter!"
CarrieS529 returned at 12:33:19 PM.
CarrieS529: i've grown tired of this one
Auto response from kirsten598: if my name were carrie i would kill myself.
CarrieS529: thats better
CarrieS529: thank you for your cooperation
Auto response from kirsten598: Two fish were in a tank. One turns to the other and asks, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
CarrieS529: haha
Auto response from kirsten598: What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh
CarrieS529: that is amusing as well
Auto response from kirsten598: Once upon a time there were two muffins in the microwave. Suddenly, on of the muffins says:
"Man it's hot in here!!!!"
The other muffin exclaims,
"Look a talking muffin!!!!"
CarrieS529: but that muffin can talk too, so why would he be surprised by a talking muffin?
Auto response from kirsten598: How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
CarrieS529: that is one of lifes great mysteries
Auto response from kirsten598: Two snowmen are standing in a field. One says to the other : "Funny, I smell carrots too".
CarrieS529: all fields smell like carrots, duh
Auto response from kirsten598: If the speed of light is 299'792'458 m/s, then what's the speed of dark?
CarrieS529: 344,567,231.869 m/s
Auto response from kirsten598: WHAT DO YOU CALL CHEESE THAT ISN'T YOURS? NACHO CHEESE
CarrieS529: but i control all of the worlds cheese supply, so it is always my cheese
Auto response from kirsten598: Why don't aliens eat clowns.
Because they taste funny.
CarrieS529: i find that they are not too bad with a little soy sauce
Auto response from kirsten598: I'm rooting for the crocodile, I hope he swallows your friends whole.
CarrieS529: me too
CarrieS529: come on now, keep up
Auto response from kirsten598: A magician was driving down the road..then he turned into a drive way...
CarrieS529: why yes, he's here now. i see his car
Auto response from kirsten598: Some things are worth dying for.... like broccoli ;-)
CarrieS529: yes, that is why the great broccoli war of 1989 was such a success
Auto response from kirsten598: It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, an Angel gets set on fire.
CarrieS529: haha, serves em right, those damn angels
Auto response from kirsten598: Clay Aiken is underground.
CarrieS529: yes, he lives among the mole people
Auto response from kirsten598: You're not as green as you are cabbage looking.
CarrieS529: i do think i was looking a bit cabbagey today
Auto response from kirsten598: There is more than one way to skin a cat, as you know, but the worst is to bore a tiny hole into the tip of the cat's tail, through which one attempts to extract the inner animal with a vacuum cleaner.
CarrieS529: really, cuz i find that works quite well
Auto response from kirsten598: even jesus hates creed.
CarrieS529: no argument there
Auto response from kirsten598: Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see.
CarrieS529: yes, that can be quite terrifying
Auto response from kirsten598: elephants are contagious.
CarrieS529: i know, theres a case of elephant going around here
Auto response from kirsten598: sometimes a cake in the shape of a ferret is the best treat.
CarrieS529: mmm... ferret shaped cake
Auto response from kirsten598: What can't be custard must be endured.
CarrieS529: you must have a lot of endurance to endure custard
Auto response from kirsten598: Your makeup looks so great next to his teeth
CarrieS529: i know, it matches his skin tone perfectly
Auto response from kirsten598: he's fat and he don't run too fast but he's faster than me.
CarrieS529: haha, you suck
Auto response from kirsten598: Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips overs, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
CarrieS529: damn ice weasels
CarrieS529: do do do do do do do, do do do do, doo do do do do do
Auto response from kirsten598: i'm bored with this...go away.
CarrieS529: ok
CarrieS529 is away at 12:45:17 PM.