Comments | kisskissbbang: Your own personal toy...

kisskissbbang

Your own personal toy...

May 06, 2010 11:19

So, let me make a post before I never get the chance to. I try to only get online when the baby is asleep. I'd rather spend time with her when she's awake, and possibly, get some things done while keeping a close eye on her, in her playing environment. Any other time I'm online is cause I'm on my ever so awesome, android.

So, a few things...

- I ( Read more... )

life, rant

Comments 14

I read this and thought I might have something to say... lanisimbel May 6 2010, 19:05:57 UTC

Well, if you want to keep the fire alive and your partner doesn't do anything about it, sorry, but you'll have to shake it up yourself. Do something simple for yourself, yet something he definitely didn't see coming... For example; take pole dancing classes. It will do wonders for your body and self-esteem, you'll get to hang out with lots of different people, make new friends + stir his imagination and interest up. He can take care of a baby for a night or two a week (after all, he might have a use of those classes of yours, in a long term)...

P. S. I suppose you feel stuck in a place and time while watching your life passing you by in boredom... It changes once you actually start actively working on yourself. After all, you can only be yourself and life is too damn precious to live it for the others. :)

Re: I read this and thought I might have something to say... kisskissbbang May 7 2010, 13:51:19 UTC

This is amazing advice. Though, it's a bit difficult for the situation I'm in. Pole dancing classes are by the beach, South Beach, I'm 30 minutes away with no car, job, money, or time (since I'm with the baby all the time, and no one to watch her). Asking him to watch the baby for a whole night would be like asking for a miracle. He's not really the shining example of a father. He works all day, comes home tired, picks up video games, and only watches her when I need to do something that can't be done with her on me. Even when he does watch her like that, he usually has one hand on his phone, ps3 controller, or computer mouse, with her on the other. So even when he does hold her for me, it's not really quality time. He's sat with her maybe twice, for about 30 minutes, to just talk to her and play with her. He's also changed like 5 diapers in 10 months. He knows nothing about her eating habits, or sleeping habits, or even how to put her to bed since she refuses to fall asleep on her own. If she gets hurt or cries, he panics and gets ( ... )

Re: I read this and thought I might have something to say... lanisimbel May 7 2010, 19:21:06 UTC

You're welcome ( ... )

Re: I read this and thought I might have something to say... lanisimbel May 7 2010, 20:06:34 UTC

Sorry, I just read your comment about weather being too hot in Fort Lauderdale... If you decide to jog, do it early in the morning and remember that the more you sweat, the faster will your body cool.

You could try putting a light-colored blanket or sheet over the stroller to keep the sun away and bringing a lots of wet tissues to refresh her skin... Also put a sunscreen on her and make sure she drinks a lot of water. :)

comic_heroine May 7 2010, 01:03:07 UTC

Well handy stuff for starters, I have a habit of friends-locking my entries. You can have it set up automatically in the settings. That way you can vent and talk about more things openly without having any strangers you don't know or don't want reading your personal entries. Speaking from personal experience of course. -Admittedly, I'm a privacy nut. My fiance is pretty good with respecting my space ( ... )

kisskissbbang May 7 2010, 15:28:45 UTC

I forgot to friends-lock this! My livejournal noobness is showing. >_The funny thing is that when I don't ask for help, I get offered help. When I need it, no one feels the need to offer anything. My step-father totally got in the way of something I was doing, only to leave it half-way done, with things in the wrong places, making me do it again. When my mother asked why this was like this...he made me seem like I was the idiot doing it wrong. The sense of entitlement most hispanic (cuban mostly) middle aged men have is frustrating ( ... )

comic_heroine May 8 2010, 04:10:57 UTC

no worries hon. I will send you a private message asking for your email then on LJ. No worries! :) It's a word doc with a cake recipe with different scratch icings, I'll add in a fantastic recipe for meatballs, and there's a great one for a cheddar cheese and bbq sauce meatloaf. Simple stuff! -The meatloaf is mixing it together, shape it, bake it, and throw a few potatoes in to bake. And don't worry if you can't think of anything to share back. I just really enjoy cooking, and a big believer in food bringing folks together. And another is a pizza recipe. It might entice him to show off throwing the dough in the air, like in the shops, or he may insist on putting the toppings on to his liking ( ... )

kisskissbbang May 9 2010, 04:01:27 UTC

Wow, you should be like a therapist or something. These are all excellent ideas that I wanna work into our relationship. He might even like the pizza idea. He loves when I try to put a meal together, and it comes out delicious, and then sees my excitement when he enjoys it. It's just so insane that he can get so overbearing, and then try to laugh with me an hour later. It's like he's bipolar or something. Some people have talked about it with him, but I'm afraid to bring it up. When he has sweet moments...they are extra sweet. But when he's angry...it's bad. Like scary bad. Not that he would harm me or the baby or anything, but his words hurt more than I think anything physical would. Maybe I'm a masochist? Maybe I need therapy? I dunno. I just hate that he makes me feel inadequate. I'm gonna try these things, and see if maybe bettering myself will motivate him to do the same ( ... )

Thread 6

nagicakes May 7 2010, 01:46:18 UTC

Urgh. =/ I hate it when guys do that whole "I expect you to do anything and everything and then still be my personal sex slave" thing. I can't really say what would spice up your sex live (or lives in general) since everyone is different, but I agree with the comment about pole-dancing. If anything, you'll have a killer bod that your hubby will drool over. >3 And a little extra self-esteem never hurt anyone.

I wish you good luck and I really hope that your hubby will learn that he can't just get home and hop on WoW. >/ If not, I'll just have to beat him up!

kisskissbbang May 7 2010, 13:40:16 UTC

Exactly. It's like, I'm expected to do everything for him, sacrifice myself with lots of things, he bitches at me literally for everything, cause he has a bad temper, and then I'm expected to be a sex goddess at his beck and call? Uhm. No.

Thanks, I'll need all the luck in the world. LOL, I'll let you know if you have to come over here and beat him up. =) ♥

nagicakes May 8 2010, 03:38:29 UTC

God, what a dick. (I mean no offense by it, but he sounds like one. Also, excuse my language. XD) My dad is the same way with my mom; he'll come home, yell at her for not having dinner ready despite that fact that he's two hours late and she can't do anything without him getting cranky. My mom plays WoW or the Xbox360 when he's not home (or when he's watching hockey, because god forbid we interrupt the game), but that's more because she's bored out of her mind.

Honestly, I would tell him "no" next time he starts trying to put the moves on you. He'll probably get pissed off or something, but he needs to learn that you can't do everything and pleasure him on a moment's notice. It doesn't work that way. I'm hoping that if you do it enough, he'll get the hint and start helping out with the baby and chores ( ... )

kisskissbbang May 9 2010, 04:11:11 UTC

Oh no, no offense taken. He is a dick. He can at least admit that much. The problem is, he knows that he is unbearable to live with sometimes, but when he's mad at me, it's like he totally forgets that point, so he's perfect, and I'm the wicked witch of the west. Most of our issues arrive also because I say no a lot. When he's angry, I find him terribly unattractive...which is crazy because he is a very attractive guy. You know the movie "She's All That"? That's our story. I was a nerd with blue hair and baggy jeans, he was one of the most popular guys at school. He never payed attention to girls like me (or any girl in that school period), but then he saw me and for some reason, really liked me, and so we ended up together (thats where the movie ends)....and then he became a dick. It's just been 7 years. It just seems like a waste to throw it all away, :\

I gotta try just going for a drive like you mentioned. Maybe that'll work. *crosses fingers*