Passing Quarter LIFE
hello, from the new me.
maybe recently, I tried to thinking a lot of things. simply like my life, my depression, my loneliness, my money, my family, my love life, but ended up with solution but no motivation to do it..
my quarter life is just like a worthless time. I Know a lot of my effort in the past has made me today. but, to see me today, I think I still broke. the new me? huh..
I want laugh but when I laughing I ask to myself, am I happy? is this real feeling? and yet still feel numb.
What I should do now is survive, could go back home met my parents, go back to my beloved rooms, and I want get married soon after I go back home.
I know marriage is not an option to for me to escape from this loneliness. Maybe I just need love from someone, but if I do not loving myself first then how I could loving other. It is just made me laugh to think of it. I'm still not mature enough.
What do you think about being mature? maybe there are some points of being mature, getting hurt and do better. but the main point is acceptance. why so hard to accept all things I have now?
disappointed. is this the word that I seek, to know what I feel, to know what I should do.
and now, I don't know how to end this journal, because I wrote this for over months. good bye. see you in next journal!!
maybe recently, I tried to thinking a lot of things. simply like my life, my depression, my loneliness, my money, my family, my love life, but ended up with solution but no motivation to do it..
my quarter life is just like a worthless time. I Know a lot of my effort in the past has made me today. but, to see me today, I think I still broke. the new me? huh..
I want laugh but when I laughing I ask to myself, am I happy? is this real feeling? and yet still feel numb.
What I should do now is survive, could go back home met my parents, go back to my beloved rooms, and I want get married soon after I go back home.
I know marriage is not an option to for me to escape from this loneliness. Maybe I just need love from someone, but if I do not loving myself first then how I could loving other. It is just made me laugh to think of it. I'm still not mature enough.
What do you think about being mature? maybe there are some points of being mature, getting hurt and do better. but the main point is acceptance. why so hard to accept all things I have now?
disappointed. is this the word that I seek, to know what I feel, to know what I should do.
and now, I don't know how to end this journal, because I wrote this for over months. good bye. see you in next journal!!