I need more freinds that don't know anyone I do ( Read more... )

I have these memories of being young, in middle school, 12 and 13...anyway, I have these memories of being little and laying in my bed at night and thinking. I'm sure it was the normal preteen bullshit that ran through my mind: boys and friends and school. But in these memories I'm sad. I remember trying to be as quiet as possible and crying in ( Read more... )

And I found some really sad ones. It made me think of how ironic it is that someone can be so beautiful and so complex and appear so happy while hiding all of these terrifying things inside of his/her mind. I think it's too intense sometimes to explain how things feel. Like talking about it or mentioning it in anyway would be construed as a means ( Read more... )

It seems that I have perfected the art of being emotionless. I think to myself, this could be considered a gift in some cultures...however, in mine, it's not. In stating that, I don't mean to imply self deprivation or dislike; I'm just telling you the truth without much inside it. The line between being truthful about oneself and denigrating ( Read more... )

I think I should make some kind of New Year's resolution...though part of me is very scared of structuring my plans. Whether it is a fear of failure, an expectance and in return acceptance of failure, or a simple rebellion for anything consisting of organized, time spaced thought; I really think making some kind of plan for my life is somewhat ( Read more... )

"I just kind of put my feelings away somewhere after that."

Today I went to the hospital thrift store for the half price sale. I looked through the books and found one I might give away for Christmas. It was Carrie by Steven King. I got five other books too, none of which were very interesting really. And when I was paying the older woman that had checked me out the following conversation took place ( Read more... )

I have wanted to paint lately. Not really anything...just paint. I want to put everything inside of myself on canvas or my walls or something very very large. Maybe I will paint the door in my room when I move in. 18 days. I feel like making clothes like I do is a form of art...but not the right kind. I mean, I love making the things I make. The ( Read more... )

I'm contemplating being very emo tonight. It is kind of odd to feel like that...emotional. I don't really, I just miss somethings that come with having some kind of significant other. I miss loving someone else. I miss being able to enjoy someone completely and not hold myself back from doing things I want to when I want to. I have been so scared ( Read more... )

Hey lts Nash: you kow how beautiful life is, kelsey ( Read more... )