It's time to talk once again.
So I'd like to talk more on my thoughts about suicide. First off, in case you have not noticed, these posts are not "friends only". They are public. This was a conscious decision on my part. This is who I am, and I'm tired of hiding it. Sure, employers don't need to know about it, but I'm smart enough to not have my internet pseudonym be linked to my work-use stuff.
Regardless, feel free to discuss it amongst yourselves, if you want. Tell other people, if you think they should know (or if you just want to gossip about me, as there is never enough gossip going on about me), or, hell, link to any of these posts anywhere you like. I doubt you'll have cause to, but if you want, it's there. After all, suicidal thoughts are something society (by which I mean American society) shames and looks down on. Don't get me wrong. I know that there are people working in suicide prevention who generally care about their cause. I don't mean to speak lightly of their profession. I realize, though, that I might be about to do just that.
So those of us who do think about suicide, a lot or a little, learn very quickly to keep our mouths shut about it. Otherwise, we are suddenly treated very differently, and not necessarily in a good way. There are all kinds of doubts about broaching the subject. Will we be taken seriously? Will people treat us like we're crazy? Will they try to lock us up for our "own good"?
And feeling suicidal often times accomplishes nothing. If you're not, at this moment, at risk, help isn't commonly available.
I should note that, while I don't have a lot of first-hand experience with what I'm talking about here, I have done a lot of research on the topic. After all, it's been on my mind a while.
So anyway, "feeling" like you want to take your own life doesn't really get you anywhere in society. But trying it? Oh man, that gets you somewhere quick. If help wasn't available before, it is suddenly thrust upon you. The reason that the phrase "a cry for help" is often used to describe suicide attempts is, quite frankly, these fuckers need help, and they've been unable to ask or unable to get it. Can't afford counseling or therapy. Can't afford meds. Can't afford expensive treatments of various sorts. One attempt later, you get it. It's not even your choice anymore. You get the help you need.
You do run a risk, of course, but at the moment, you're more than willing to take that risk.
And I think a big reason this happens is because people are scared shitless to talk about. Lord knows I was.
So fuck that. I'm talking about it. Everyone and anyone is welcome to talk with me about it. Are you not suicidal? Ask A Dude Who Is. Are you, in fact, thinking about taking your own life? Talk to someone who can really empathize.
All right, onto other things about this.
So these feelings obviously influence a large part of my life. I don't drink, and this is a big reason why. It is documented that mental problems run in my mother's side of the family. It is quite likely that they run rampant and undiagnosed on my father's side, but they just choose to "self medicate" (but no heroin, dammit).
So there's that. But you know what else it influences? My decision to not have kids.
Now, don't get me wrong. There's plenty of reasons I'm not having kids, but this is definitely among them. Kids cause stress, which I don't need. Also, fuck passing on these cocked-up genes. And don't give me that shit about forming a bond with the child after they're born. I know it happens to a lot of dudes and ladies. But you know what else? A lot of other times, they don't. They just become as good of a parent as they can out of obligation, or they just become bad parents.
And don't fucking tell me that that can't happen to me because the sun shines out my ass. Until you can give me concrete evidence one way or another, I say anything's as good a chance as another.
And like I said, this is only one of the many reasons I don't want to have kids. You'd still have to get past the "overpopulation" angle, and I don't think you've got the batshit insanity necessary to wipe out most of the human race so I can feel OK about procreating.
Now I just feel like a ranting, raving madman. And my decongestant is kicking in. Time for bed, I think. Miss ya, folks.
EDIT
Ending this with a quote.
“Life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and its sucked every second so far, it probably isn't gonna get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early.” -Doug Stanhope
Regardless, feel free to discuss it amongst yourselves, if you want. Tell other people, if you think they should know (or if you just want to gossip about me, as there is never enough gossip going on about me), or, hell, link to any of these posts anywhere you like. I doubt you'll have cause to, but if you want, it's there. After all, suicidal thoughts are something society (by which I mean American society) shames and looks down on. Don't get me wrong. I know that there are people working in suicide prevention who generally care about their cause. I don't mean to speak lightly of their profession. I realize, though, that I might be about to do just that.
So those of us who do think about suicide, a lot or a little, learn very quickly to keep our mouths shut about it. Otherwise, we are suddenly treated very differently, and not necessarily in a good way. There are all kinds of doubts about broaching the subject. Will we be taken seriously? Will people treat us like we're crazy? Will they try to lock us up for our "own good"?
And feeling suicidal often times accomplishes nothing. If you're not, at this moment, at risk, help isn't commonly available.
I should note that, while I don't have a lot of first-hand experience with what I'm talking about here, I have done a lot of research on the topic. After all, it's been on my mind a while.
So anyway, "feeling" like you want to take your own life doesn't really get you anywhere in society. But trying it? Oh man, that gets you somewhere quick. If help wasn't available before, it is suddenly thrust upon you. The reason that the phrase "a cry for help" is often used to describe suicide attempts is, quite frankly, these fuckers need help, and they've been unable to ask or unable to get it. Can't afford counseling or therapy. Can't afford meds. Can't afford expensive treatments of various sorts. One attempt later, you get it. It's not even your choice anymore. You get the help you need.
You do run a risk, of course, but at the moment, you're more than willing to take that risk.
And I think a big reason this happens is because people are scared shitless to talk about. Lord knows I was.
So fuck that. I'm talking about it. Everyone and anyone is welcome to talk with me about it. Are you not suicidal? Ask A Dude Who Is. Are you, in fact, thinking about taking your own life? Talk to someone who can really empathize.
All right, onto other things about this.
So these feelings obviously influence a large part of my life. I don't drink, and this is a big reason why. It is documented that mental problems run in my mother's side of the family. It is quite likely that they run rampant and undiagnosed on my father's side, but they just choose to "self medicate" (but no heroin, dammit).
So there's that. But you know what else it influences? My decision to not have kids.
Now, don't get me wrong. There's plenty of reasons I'm not having kids, but this is definitely among them. Kids cause stress, which I don't need. Also, fuck passing on these cocked-up genes. And don't give me that shit about forming a bond with the child after they're born. I know it happens to a lot of dudes and ladies. But you know what else? A lot of other times, they don't. They just become as good of a parent as they can out of obligation, or they just become bad parents.
And don't fucking tell me that that can't happen to me because the sun shines out my ass. Until you can give me concrete evidence one way or another, I say anything's as good a chance as another.
And like I said, this is only one of the many reasons I don't want to have kids. You'd still have to get past the "overpopulation" angle, and I don't think you've got the batshit insanity necessary to wipe out most of the human race so I can feel OK about procreating.
Now I just feel like a ranting, raving madman. And my decongestant is kicking in. Time for bed, I think. Miss ya, folks.
EDIT
Ending this with a quote.
“Life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and its sucked every second so far, it probably isn't gonna get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early.” -Doug Stanhope