Hers Chapter 6
Title: Hers
Pairing(s): David Cook/David Archuleta
Rating: PG to NC-17
Genre: AU
Disclaimer: The real-life characters do not belong to me, and the story is fictional.
Summary: David falls in love with someone he can't have, but what happens when that person wants him back?
Author's Notes: This fic was originally posted at cookleta from July 2008 to September 2008. :)
6
I. David Archuleta.
It was still pitch black outside when I woke up the next morning, and I fumbled in the dark to turn off my alarm clock before it woke someone else. I remembered having to get up hours before school to go running during cross country season, but my body had since grown out of the habit, and I pushed back the covers of my bed wearily, my eyes half-closed. I felt more awake after splashing my face with cold water, and I stuffed my sports bag with an extra set of clothes and slung it over one shoulder along with my backpack before heading downstairs. I left a note for Mom and grabbed one of Dan’s energy bars on my way out.
It was almost mid-May but with the sun barely peeking out, the cold stung at my skin nonetheless. My mind traveled back a few months when my day was all about school and cross-country, when life was structured and not so complicated. So much had changed since then, and I hoped that maybe Prescott would help me get a grip on things without being swept up.
He was already there on the field when I walked through the gate. The sky was turning a faint pink color now, and I could see his friendly grin as he waved. I set my things next to his on the pavement and ran over to join him on the track.
“Should we warm up before you beat me?”
“Yeah, I think that would be better for you.”
His warm laughter echoed through the open space and it seemed to envelop me like a blanket. I relaxed at the sound. It was so odd how Prescott’s presence had such an effect on me.
We jogged laps around the track for a good half hour, with only our breathing to break the silence. Neither of us said anything but it was comforting knowing that someone was there with me. The cloudiness in my head from talking to Jaidyn last night was dissipating, and with each gush of fresh air that filled my lungs, I felt like I could think clearly again.
After finishing up a few miles the two of us lay down on the grass field that filled the oval center of the track, the dew soaking into the cloth of our t-shirts, already damp from the run. I could see Prescott’s chest move up and down as he caught his breath. Lying on my back reminded me of what had happened in my room yesterday afternoon, and my cheeks flushed a bright red.
“Hey, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, what is it?” I answered, my eyes still focused on the clouds above us, which were becoming more visible now that the hour for sunrise was inching closer.
“Why did you want to go running today?”
His question caught me off guard, although a part of me wasn’t surprised that he’d noticed that something was wrong. I remained silent as he waited patiently, my mind racing to find the right explanation.
“Prescott?”
“Hmm?”
“Remember when I asked you about… being unsure of someone’s feelings for you?”
“Yeah.”
“Well…” I closed my eyes. “It turns out that I was right, but it’s too late.”
“What do you mean?”
“There’s already someone else.”
“And you’re giving up that easily?” he said immediately, surprising me again. He’d spoken as if I had another option.
“I can’t just demand an end to a relationship that’s already there.” My tone was bitter, almost resentful. “If the person’s not willing to break it off then… then it’s not worth it right?”
“Sometimes it is,” Prescott replied, effortlessly undermining my weak justification. “Sometimes you want to risk getting hurt because it’s that important. It doesn’t matter anymore that there’s someone else.”
He was so confident in his answer that I didn’t know what to say. We didn’t share that kind of self-assurance. I was always plagued with doubt but he was different, strong and unyielding to pressure. I figured that that was the reason why I felt comfortable and secure around him even though we’d gotten to know each other literally days ago.
The sky was brighter now, and I swung my left arm around from behind my head to check the time.
“Hey I think we should go in now.”
Prescott nodded and got up. I went along but almost fell again because I’d sat up too quickly. I gave Prescott a dark look when he chuckled and reached out to steady me. I was always so clumsy. It was amazing how I was able to run long distances without tripping every few hundred feet.
We dumped our bags on the wooden benches in the locker room, and my face started burning again at the memory of Cook’s kissing me two days ago. Luckily, Prescott didn’t notice as he headed into one of the showers, and I glumly picked up my towel and followed.
I was out in fewer than ten minutes, drying off quickly and pulling on my clothes. I almost dropped the bag I was packing up when I saw Prescott walk up next to me, shirtless. Water trailed down along his muscled torso, and I was so relieved that he’d put on his jeans instead of just a towel. I tore my eyes away, shaking my head.
“David?”
“Y-yeah?”
“You know that you can always come to me if you’re having a bad day right?” Somehow the words didn’t seem so cliché when he said it in such earnest. I just wondered if he would say the same thing if he knew what I was dealing with.
“Are you sure?”
“Well, it doesn’t really fall under the job description for a lab partner,” he joked, his brown eyes teasing but sincere. “I think I can manage, though.”
He pulled me into a hug, and I leaned against him, his body still warm from the hot shower. I felt his breath on my neck and I shuddered a little at the closeness. He released me after a moment, staring intently at me. And before I realized what was happening, he was kissing me, his lips pushing tenderly against my own.
I gasped and shut my eyes, every nerve inside my body feeling like it was on fire. It was warm inside the locker room but I still shivered when the tip of his tongue brushed my lower lip. The kiss was dizzying, and I was glad that he was there to hold me up from falling on the cement.
My thoughts were all over the place, chaotic, but I somehow managed to make the connection about how ironic this situation was. Here I was, being kissed in the locker room by a guy for the second time in two days.
Boy, if the school only knew.
II. David Cook.
Jaidyn had insisted that we give Salt Lake another try, so I let her drag me through lunch, shopping, and sightseeing for half the day. Like any other boyfriend, I carried bags and struggled with choosing among three turquoise summer dresses that Jaidyn tried on. They looked exactly the same to me, but Jaidyn just rolled her eyes and argued that they were completely different styles. She said something about ruffles around the collar but, being me, my thoughts drifted to potato chips.
I was so relieved to come back to the house that I pulled Lupe into a bear hug as soon as she opened the door. She stared at me while I made my way to the stairs, suspicious that I’d had a heat stroke while I was out. Once in my room, I took the guitar that I’d left next to the dresser and sat on my bed. Halfway through one of the songs I’ve been working on lately, there was a knock on my door. To my surprise, David walked in, shyly fiddling with the belt loops of his jeans.
“I heard you playing…”
“I’m just practicing,” I shrugged, trying not to notice the way the t-shirt he was wearing hugged his upper body.
“I always wanted to learn but I had a lot on my hands with piano.” He eyed my guitar. “That’s not the one you usually use, right? It doesn’t have the initials.”
“Yeah that’s my Gibson Les Paul…” I smiled, secretly pleased that David cared enough to know such a detail about me.
His lips curled up slightly in return, and there was silence filling the room again. When it started to get uncomfortable, I positioned the pick I’d been twirling around in my fingers near the six strings.
“Want to hear a song?”
“Sure,” he said, sitting down on the carpet.
My fingers quickly found the first of the familiar chords, and I strummed the short introduction. I saw his eyes light up in recognition, and I could feel my heart swell with the contentment that I was finally doing something that made him smile.
“I’ve been waiting for my dreams to turn into something I could believe in. And looking for that magic rainbow on the horizon, I couldn’t see it until I let go, gave into love, and watched all the bitterness burn. Now I’m coming alive, body and soul, and feeling my world start to turn…”
Nostalgia rushed over me as I finished the first verse of “Time of My Life.” It was my official debut single, the song that had turned me into the artist I was now. I remember being in the recording studio, putting every ounce of my energy into it, appreciating every word because it was my story, the bartender and broke musician living from gig to gig who was discovered at a venue one night, just a week after telling his mother that he would give music just one more month - one last chance.
I was so absorbed in these memories that I didn’t realize that David had begun to sing the last chorus.
“And I’ll taste every moment and live it out loud. I know this is the time; this is the time to be more than a name or a face in the crowd. I know this is the time; this is the time of my life.”
I’d stopped singing and he ducked his head, his cheeks slightly red. His voice was so rich and pure. The song was so different, practically reborn when he sang it, more endearing and mellow without the rock vibe I always added. I continued to stare in awe, which made him dart his eyes away again.
“You’re incredible,” I blurted out, not breaking my gaze.
“No, I’m not… I like to sing, that’s all.”
“Are you kidding? Please tell me you’ve sung before in public.”
“Well, I… used to be in choir and I sing at church sometimes…”
“And what do people do when you finish?”
“Sure, they clap and everything,” he admitted but cut back in before I could interrupt. “But I always thought that everyone was a little tone deaf or… just really nice, I don’t know.”
He was so damn modest. I could already name artists who didn’t have half his talent and still stuck their noses up in the air like they were gifts from God given to the music industry. I opened my mouth to tell him this when the door opened and Jaidyn poked her head in. She glanced at the two of us, an unreadable expression crossing her porcelain face.
“Babe, you want to go swimming? Amber and Jazzy begged Mom to take them so we’re all going.”
“Uh, sure.” I turned to David, whom she hadn’t asked. “What about you, David?”
“Dave hates the pool,” Jaidyn answered for him, leaving no room for David to counter.
“It’s true,” David agreed quietly. “I don’t like swimming…”
“You know what, Jaidyn? I think I’m actually gonna stay behind. Kind of tired from the shopping.”
David’s eyes shot up in surprise and Jaidyn’s lips formed a straight line in obvious disapproval. She didn’t object, however, when she saw that I wasn’t going to change my decision. She knew that I could be as stubborn as she was.
“Alright. I’ll see you two when we get back,” she said flatly before just about slamming the door behind her.
“Why do you make her mad like that?” David asked when we both heard the garage door open and close, sounding exasperated.
“I would rather spend my time with you.” It was an honest answer.
“… Why?”
“Well, I like you.” I was shocked at how easily I could confess it.
“You only say that because I look like Jaidyn,” he muttered.
“No,” I shot back, frowning. “All of this happened because she looks like you.”
“What?” His forehead wrinkled in confusion.
“When I saw her for the first time, I couldn’t believe how much she reminded me of you. It was impulsive and stupid but I asked her out. In the back of my mind, I knew that it was too much of a coincidence that the two of you looked so much alike but I kept on hoping that I could be happy with her. But it’s not going to happen that way because… She looks like you, David. But she isn’t you.”
“I can’t believe this…” His voice was tense, almost hostile.
“It’s the truth.”
“Did you expect me to jump up and down with joy when I heard this?”
“I just wanted you to know that this wasn’t something that happened in the spur of the moment. I’ve been thinking about you for months, frustrated at myself and guilty about what I was doing to Jaidyn, knowing that it’s horrible. But now that I realize that my feelings may not be so one-sided, I’m totally lost.”
“And if we reveal everything we’ve been hiding?”
I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. By listening to his voice, I knew that the tears were in his eyes. I’d put them there again. I wondered if I’d ever despised myself more.
“What am I left with then, David?” he spat. “I might as well risk losing my family if I announce that I’m gay. I’ll be thrown out from everywhere that I’d ever belonged to. My life will turn upside down. What then?”
“Would you rather stick with denial?” My words were insensitive, and I could see his reaction, his hurt, plainly on his pale face. But there was anger building up inside, too strong for me to push back down. “You don’t seem to hide your feelings when it comes to other people.”
“Are you talking about Prescott?”
“Whatever the hell his name is,” I brushed off his question, setting my guitar aside so I wouldn’t be tempted to snap it in half to vent my aggravation.
“You know, I really hope that I can force my heart to love him more than I love you.” The pain in his voice cut into me like a thousand knives, searing themselves into my memory to haunt me forever. “If I can do that, I won’t have to be such an awful brother, and maybe I won’t disgust myself as much.”
I jumped up to go after him but he was quicker, and I found myself staring at the closed door instead. I leaned my head against it, my forehead hitting the wood with a dull thud.
We were back to square one.
Pairing(s): David Cook/David Archuleta
Rating: PG to NC-17
Genre: AU
Disclaimer: The real-life characters do not belong to me, and the story is fictional.
Summary: David falls in love with someone he can't have, but what happens when that person wants him back?
Author's Notes: This fic was originally posted at cookleta from July 2008 to September 2008. :)
6
I. David Archuleta.
It was still pitch black outside when I woke up the next morning, and I fumbled in the dark to turn off my alarm clock before it woke someone else. I remembered having to get up hours before school to go running during cross country season, but my body had since grown out of the habit, and I pushed back the covers of my bed wearily, my eyes half-closed. I felt more awake after splashing my face with cold water, and I stuffed my sports bag with an extra set of clothes and slung it over one shoulder along with my backpack before heading downstairs. I left a note for Mom and grabbed one of Dan’s energy bars on my way out.
It was almost mid-May but with the sun barely peeking out, the cold stung at my skin nonetheless. My mind traveled back a few months when my day was all about school and cross-country, when life was structured and not so complicated. So much had changed since then, and I hoped that maybe Prescott would help me get a grip on things without being swept up.
He was already there on the field when I walked through the gate. The sky was turning a faint pink color now, and I could see his friendly grin as he waved. I set my things next to his on the pavement and ran over to join him on the track.
“Should we warm up before you beat me?”
“Yeah, I think that would be better for you.”
His warm laughter echoed through the open space and it seemed to envelop me like a blanket. I relaxed at the sound. It was so odd how Prescott’s presence had such an effect on me.
We jogged laps around the track for a good half hour, with only our breathing to break the silence. Neither of us said anything but it was comforting knowing that someone was there with me. The cloudiness in my head from talking to Jaidyn last night was dissipating, and with each gush of fresh air that filled my lungs, I felt like I could think clearly again.
After finishing up a few miles the two of us lay down on the grass field that filled the oval center of the track, the dew soaking into the cloth of our t-shirts, already damp from the run. I could see Prescott’s chest move up and down as he caught his breath. Lying on my back reminded me of what had happened in my room yesterday afternoon, and my cheeks flushed a bright red.
“Hey, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, what is it?” I answered, my eyes still focused on the clouds above us, which were becoming more visible now that the hour for sunrise was inching closer.
“Why did you want to go running today?”
His question caught me off guard, although a part of me wasn’t surprised that he’d noticed that something was wrong. I remained silent as he waited patiently, my mind racing to find the right explanation.
“Prescott?”
“Hmm?”
“Remember when I asked you about… being unsure of someone’s feelings for you?”
“Yeah.”
“Well…” I closed my eyes. “It turns out that I was right, but it’s too late.”
“What do you mean?”
“There’s already someone else.”
“And you’re giving up that easily?” he said immediately, surprising me again. He’d spoken as if I had another option.
“I can’t just demand an end to a relationship that’s already there.” My tone was bitter, almost resentful. “If the person’s not willing to break it off then… then it’s not worth it right?”
“Sometimes it is,” Prescott replied, effortlessly undermining my weak justification. “Sometimes you want to risk getting hurt because it’s that important. It doesn’t matter anymore that there’s someone else.”
He was so confident in his answer that I didn’t know what to say. We didn’t share that kind of self-assurance. I was always plagued with doubt but he was different, strong and unyielding to pressure. I figured that that was the reason why I felt comfortable and secure around him even though we’d gotten to know each other literally days ago.
The sky was brighter now, and I swung my left arm around from behind my head to check the time.
“Hey I think we should go in now.”
Prescott nodded and got up. I went along but almost fell again because I’d sat up too quickly. I gave Prescott a dark look when he chuckled and reached out to steady me. I was always so clumsy. It was amazing how I was able to run long distances without tripping every few hundred feet.
We dumped our bags on the wooden benches in the locker room, and my face started burning again at the memory of Cook’s kissing me two days ago. Luckily, Prescott didn’t notice as he headed into one of the showers, and I glumly picked up my towel and followed.
I was out in fewer than ten minutes, drying off quickly and pulling on my clothes. I almost dropped the bag I was packing up when I saw Prescott walk up next to me, shirtless. Water trailed down along his muscled torso, and I was so relieved that he’d put on his jeans instead of just a towel. I tore my eyes away, shaking my head.
“David?”
“Y-yeah?”
“You know that you can always come to me if you’re having a bad day right?” Somehow the words didn’t seem so cliché when he said it in such earnest. I just wondered if he would say the same thing if he knew what I was dealing with.
“Are you sure?”
“Well, it doesn’t really fall under the job description for a lab partner,” he joked, his brown eyes teasing but sincere. “I think I can manage, though.”
He pulled me into a hug, and I leaned against him, his body still warm from the hot shower. I felt his breath on my neck and I shuddered a little at the closeness. He released me after a moment, staring intently at me. And before I realized what was happening, he was kissing me, his lips pushing tenderly against my own.
I gasped and shut my eyes, every nerve inside my body feeling like it was on fire. It was warm inside the locker room but I still shivered when the tip of his tongue brushed my lower lip. The kiss was dizzying, and I was glad that he was there to hold me up from falling on the cement.
My thoughts were all over the place, chaotic, but I somehow managed to make the connection about how ironic this situation was. Here I was, being kissed in the locker room by a guy for the second time in two days.
Boy, if the school only knew.
II. David Cook.
Jaidyn had insisted that we give Salt Lake another try, so I let her drag me through lunch, shopping, and sightseeing for half the day. Like any other boyfriend, I carried bags and struggled with choosing among three turquoise summer dresses that Jaidyn tried on. They looked exactly the same to me, but Jaidyn just rolled her eyes and argued that they were completely different styles. She said something about ruffles around the collar but, being me, my thoughts drifted to potato chips.
I was so relieved to come back to the house that I pulled Lupe into a bear hug as soon as she opened the door. She stared at me while I made my way to the stairs, suspicious that I’d had a heat stroke while I was out. Once in my room, I took the guitar that I’d left next to the dresser and sat on my bed. Halfway through one of the songs I’ve been working on lately, there was a knock on my door. To my surprise, David walked in, shyly fiddling with the belt loops of his jeans.
“I heard you playing…”
“I’m just practicing,” I shrugged, trying not to notice the way the t-shirt he was wearing hugged his upper body.
“I always wanted to learn but I had a lot on my hands with piano.” He eyed my guitar. “That’s not the one you usually use, right? It doesn’t have the initials.”
“Yeah that’s my Gibson Les Paul…” I smiled, secretly pleased that David cared enough to know such a detail about me.
His lips curled up slightly in return, and there was silence filling the room again. When it started to get uncomfortable, I positioned the pick I’d been twirling around in my fingers near the six strings.
“Want to hear a song?”
“Sure,” he said, sitting down on the carpet.
My fingers quickly found the first of the familiar chords, and I strummed the short introduction. I saw his eyes light up in recognition, and I could feel my heart swell with the contentment that I was finally doing something that made him smile.
“I’ve been waiting for my dreams to turn into something I could believe in. And looking for that magic rainbow on the horizon, I couldn’t see it until I let go, gave into love, and watched all the bitterness burn. Now I’m coming alive, body and soul, and feeling my world start to turn…”
Nostalgia rushed over me as I finished the first verse of “Time of My Life.” It was my official debut single, the song that had turned me into the artist I was now. I remember being in the recording studio, putting every ounce of my energy into it, appreciating every word because it was my story, the bartender and broke musician living from gig to gig who was discovered at a venue one night, just a week after telling his mother that he would give music just one more month - one last chance.
I was so absorbed in these memories that I didn’t realize that David had begun to sing the last chorus.
“And I’ll taste every moment and live it out loud. I know this is the time; this is the time to be more than a name or a face in the crowd. I know this is the time; this is the time of my life.”
I’d stopped singing and he ducked his head, his cheeks slightly red. His voice was so rich and pure. The song was so different, practically reborn when he sang it, more endearing and mellow without the rock vibe I always added. I continued to stare in awe, which made him dart his eyes away again.
“You’re incredible,” I blurted out, not breaking my gaze.
“No, I’m not… I like to sing, that’s all.”
“Are you kidding? Please tell me you’ve sung before in public.”
“Well, I… used to be in choir and I sing at church sometimes…”
“And what do people do when you finish?”
“Sure, they clap and everything,” he admitted but cut back in before I could interrupt. “But I always thought that everyone was a little tone deaf or… just really nice, I don’t know.”
He was so damn modest. I could already name artists who didn’t have half his talent and still stuck their noses up in the air like they were gifts from God given to the music industry. I opened my mouth to tell him this when the door opened and Jaidyn poked her head in. She glanced at the two of us, an unreadable expression crossing her porcelain face.
“Babe, you want to go swimming? Amber and Jazzy begged Mom to take them so we’re all going.”
“Uh, sure.” I turned to David, whom she hadn’t asked. “What about you, David?”
“Dave hates the pool,” Jaidyn answered for him, leaving no room for David to counter.
“It’s true,” David agreed quietly. “I don’t like swimming…”
“You know what, Jaidyn? I think I’m actually gonna stay behind. Kind of tired from the shopping.”
David’s eyes shot up in surprise and Jaidyn’s lips formed a straight line in obvious disapproval. She didn’t object, however, when she saw that I wasn’t going to change my decision. She knew that I could be as stubborn as she was.
“Alright. I’ll see you two when we get back,” she said flatly before just about slamming the door behind her.
“Why do you make her mad like that?” David asked when we both heard the garage door open and close, sounding exasperated.
“I would rather spend my time with you.” It was an honest answer.
“… Why?”
“Well, I like you.” I was shocked at how easily I could confess it.
“You only say that because I look like Jaidyn,” he muttered.
“No,” I shot back, frowning. “All of this happened because she looks like you.”
“What?” His forehead wrinkled in confusion.
“When I saw her for the first time, I couldn’t believe how much she reminded me of you. It was impulsive and stupid but I asked her out. In the back of my mind, I knew that it was too much of a coincidence that the two of you looked so much alike but I kept on hoping that I could be happy with her. But it’s not going to happen that way because… She looks like you, David. But she isn’t you.”
“I can’t believe this…” His voice was tense, almost hostile.
“It’s the truth.”
“Did you expect me to jump up and down with joy when I heard this?”
“I just wanted you to know that this wasn’t something that happened in the spur of the moment. I’ve been thinking about you for months, frustrated at myself and guilty about what I was doing to Jaidyn, knowing that it’s horrible. But now that I realize that my feelings may not be so one-sided, I’m totally lost.”
“And if we reveal everything we’ve been hiding?”
I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. By listening to his voice, I knew that the tears were in his eyes. I’d put them there again. I wondered if I’d ever despised myself more.
“What am I left with then, David?” he spat. “I might as well risk losing my family if I announce that I’m gay. I’ll be thrown out from everywhere that I’d ever belonged to. My life will turn upside down. What then?”
“Would you rather stick with denial?” My words were insensitive, and I could see his reaction, his hurt, plainly on his pale face. But there was anger building up inside, too strong for me to push back down. “You don’t seem to hide your feelings when it comes to other people.”
“Are you talking about Prescott?”
“Whatever the hell his name is,” I brushed off his question, setting my guitar aside so I wouldn’t be tempted to snap it in half to vent my aggravation.
“You know, I really hope that I can force my heart to love him more than I love you.” The pain in his voice cut into me like a thousand knives, searing themselves into my memory to haunt me forever. “If I can do that, I won’t have to be such an awful brother, and maybe I won’t disgust myself as much.”
I jumped up to go after him but he was quicker, and I found myself staring at the closed door instead. I leaned my head against it, my forehead hitting the wood with a dull thud.
We were back to square one.