wasn't that what rubin was all about? how the 20 year-old and the 17 year-old is the same as the 60 year-old and the 8 year-old. the problem comes not with the extremes but with the more subtle cases: a 30 year-old and a 14 year-old, a 23 year-old and a 12 year-old.
i do believe we treat sex as if it is dirty and harmful, when it should be celebrated for being beautiful, uniting, and loving. but i, like rubin, do not have any answers for the impossible questions. the problem is that maturity is neither quantifiable nor checkable. it simply is different for different individuals.
My two cents...jpm9170February 14 2007, 16:49:28 UTC
A very interesting subject and one that I agree requires further thought and redefinition. It's amazing how much our relationship redefined how people view me. You and I were together for about 16 months, and because of the 16 year age difference, people now assume that I only date guys who are significantly younger than me. This is in spite of the fact that guys I dated before you were three, five and seven years my junior, and the guy I dated after you was seven years my junior. But because we dated, people still think of me as a 'cradle robber' or uninterested in anyone close to my age
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I knew a pedophile when I lived in New Orleans. He'd never acted on his sexual urges, knowing that they were "wrong" (as he said) (he was sexually aroused by little little kids, about 5ish - 9ish range) and made sure to let me know because he was friend's with my boyfriend of the time and my daughter and I were visiting him. Never once looked made me feel uncomfortable with him in the room, but I of course made sure to not leave him alone with Mia (like I would with any stranger around my kind of course).
The only problem I've had with pedophilia is that, at least in a lot of what I've seen on the news/read in the papers/etc the younger person was taken advantage of. While there isn't anything inherently wrong with someone with a tendency towards pedophilia, if they cross the line (molestation/rape/etc), well, there's a problem.
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i do believe we treat sex as if it is dirty and harmful, when it should be celebrated for being beautiful, uniting, and loving. but i, like rubin, do not have any answers for the impossible questions. the problem is that maturity is neither quantifiable nor checkable. it simply is different for different individuals.
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The only problem I've had with pedophilia is that, at least in a lot of what I've seen on the news/read in the papers/etc the younger person was taken advantage of. While there isn't anything inherently wrong with someone with a tendency towards pedophilia, if they cross the line (molestation/rape/etc), well, there's a problem.
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