[FIC] Twelve Minutes (Yamapi x Maki)
Title: Twelve Minutes
Pairing: Yamashita Tomohisa x Horikita Maki
Rating: PG
Summary: Twelve minutes, before and after, and they just didn't want to get hurt again.
A/N: Written for suboshiyui, part of je_whiteday. Stupid me thought White Day was March 12th, guess what, it's NOT! Bwuzzah. But flow with 12? Thank you.
Twelve minutes before their relationship ended, he didn't really see it coming.
He was in a club, unwinding after a very long day of work, endless interviews and tiring rehearsals. She called him then, and he missed three calls from her due to Ryo’s loud singing and Jin’s half-drunk antics, the overall deafening noise level, before he finally picked up and shouted a hello.
She said something and he couldn’t hear her the first time, and she spoke again - louder - and asked him where he was.
“I’m out with the guys.” And even though she didn’t ask him to elaborate, he could somehow sensed the tingling resentment that he was with them instead of with her, and so he found himself adding defensively. “It’s been a long and hard day, and I just want a drink.”
“Are you coming home?” Her words were quiet, and he just managed to hear her above the din.
“I’ll be late.” He said, his tone dismissive to an extent, but he thought she would, and she should understand - it had been too exhausting a day and he needed to relax.
“Tomo…” That was all he heard, for whatever she said next was drowned out by Jin’s loud shrieks as Kame slammed into him, and they both knocked into Yamapi, hysterical and drunk.
“Look, Maki - I’ll call. Later. And I’ll be home as soon as possible.”
She didn’t say anything in reply to that, she merely hung up the phone.
Twelve minutes later, his phone beeped with an incoming message.
But he didn’t hear the beep, didn’t see the message until he stumbled home three hours later, to find his apartment empty, dark and eerily quite. It was only when he pulled out his phone to call her, then only he saw the message - short and to the point.
I’m leaving. This is not working. Good bye.
He stared at the little lit screen, his head spinning with both confusion and alcohol, and he immediately pressed the button the call her, but her phone was switched off. He then called Meisa’s number, who picked up, and called him a fucking bastard, said that she hopes he rots in hell ten thousand times over, and then hung up on him.
Twelve minutes later, he hadn't moved.
Yamapi was still sitting in his living room, unable to find the strength to move, unable to do anything.
------
Twelve minutes before he saw her again, he didn't really expect to be seeing her.
It was a week after she ended their relationship, and it had been a week that he had done nothing constructive, and Jin was trying to get him out of his apartment.
“You can't hide in here forever.” Jin argued, with unusual reason (for him).
“Go away, Jin.” He said listlessly, flopped on his couch, unkempt and unshaven, pressing Maki's number over and over again, and hearing for the ten millionth time that she was not available. He wanted to work things out, he wanted to say he was sorry, he wanted to say a lot of things, but she wasn't giving him any chance to say anything.
“I'm running out of excuses as to why you're not showing up for work.”
“Tell them I'm dying. Or I died. Or something.”
“That's it.” Jin strode over to his prone form, and yanked him upright, so hard that Yamapi thought he might have dislocated his shoulder.
“What the fuck, Jin?!”
“I don't care, right now, you're going to get up, get dressed, and face the world like a man you're supposed to be, and not a worm. Get real, Pi. Life doesn't end here, no matter how stupidly melodramatic you want to be.” Jin's uncharacteristically sharp tones somehow managed to snap Yamapi back to some sort of reality. And although he wanted to retort how Jin never really knew what love is, he didn't, because at this point, he wasn't sure he knew what love is all about anyway, not as sure as he used to be.
And so he grudgingly found himself in Jin's car, heading back to work and not looking forward to it. As he headed into the building, Jin practically pushing him in, he nearly collided with two other people. He looked up to apologise, but the words died on his tongue when he saw himself looking at Maki - wearing a huge pair of sunglasses, and Meisa, a gigantic scowl on her face.
His heart raced, and flipped, and hundreds of emotions ran through him, and he thought she looked sort-of frail, and drawn and his heart started to hurt. He reached out for her, his fingers brushing against her sleeve, and his lips formed her name - Maki - and then she was gone, and his fingers grasped air, as Meisa planted herself between them, pushing Maki through the doorway.
“Don't even fucking think about it.” She hissed.
Twelve minutes later, he couldn't find her anywhere.
------
Twelve minutes before she called him, she knew she shouldn't be thinking about him.
That was the way that she could get her clean break, Meisa argued, and Maki knew that her best friend was right. She shouldn't think about him, but it was so hard when everything around her seemed to remind her of him, of them, of how things used to be between them, before work and stress and a lot of other unexplainable factors drove them apart. She remembered the good times, how they laughed and talked, how her hand always felt so small but safe in his, she remembered his face, his smile, his laugh, his kisses. She remembered the way they made love, the way he said her name, so endearing and breathy and full of affection, and how it felt like it was forever.
But at the same time, she remembered how they fell apart - how work just got to be too much, how they never get to see each other, and how Yamapi was often stressed and drinking, and not coming home till late. On her side, her commitments meant that she would have left early in the morning even before Yamapi woke up, still trying to recover from the late nights.
And gradually, they forgot how to talk to each other, they forgot how to be with each other, until that one last phone call, when she decided it just wasn't worth the effort anymore, not when they seemed to be pretending and going through the motions, not when they didn't seem like they want to be with each other anymore.
But some part of her held fast onto some part of them, and despite Meisa alternating between cajoling and threatening her, she picked up her phone, and she called him. And when she heard his voice, cracked, tired, flat and almost devoid of any emotion, sounding so unlike the Tomohisa she knew, she felt her chest hurting, and she thought it might be her heart.
Twelve minutes later, she thought she may stilll be in love with him.
------
Twelve minutes before she told him why, he knew he wanted her back.
“It doesn't seem like it was worth it anymore.” She said softly, tearing her napkin into little pieces, her eyes downwards, not looking at him.
“I thought...” he paused, thinking about what he should say, and he thought he should just said what he really felt. “I thought we're worth everything.”
“We were.” She said tiredly. “But you have to see the signs. You have to realise that we are not fighting to make this work. You don't come home earlier.”
“I...”
She held up her hand to stop him, continuing. “And despite Meisa's attitude, I know you're not the one to blame, entirely. I didn't try to schedule my work either, I didn't try to make time for you.”
Her words were true, he knew, and he understood that. What he didn't understand was why, why did they stop trying? Why?
“We grew apart.” She said simply. “Maybe that was the reason. We grew apart, and we don't need each other anymore.”
He shook his head, refusing to agree. “We can still make this work.” He interjected, his tone pleading.
She sighed. “We can't, Tomo. One day, you will realise that you don't need me, you don't need anybody.” She looked up at him, her gaze steady. “I don't want to get hurt again.”
He reached across the table, and took her hand. She tried to yank it out of his grip, but he held on, not letting her go.
“I'm sorry for not trying, I'm sorry for letting us go. I won't ever...” He took a deep breath, and lifted their clasped hands. “I won't ever let go. Again. We're worth it, Maki.”
Tears welled in her eyes despite her best efforts to control them, and he continued talking, determination etched upon his face. “Maybe somedays, we will fight, we will argue, we will disagree, and you will hate me. Maybe there will be a day when we feel that we don't need each other. But don't you see? All these are just days, random moments in our lives. It's not the rest of our lives, Maki.”
“Because I want to need you, and I want you to need me, for the rest of our lives.”
Looking into his eyes, she saw regret, she saw desperation, and most of all, she saw love, love, it was there, and she knew he was right.
She couldn't let go either.
Twelve minutes later, they knew they still loved each other.
------
Twelve minutes before he kissed her, he told her that he loved her.
After all the starts and stops, the apologies, the mistakes, and the efforts, after everything, only one fact remained, and that was that he loved her, plain and simple.
And she loved him.
And then he kissed her, lightly at first, and then he thought about how much he missed her, how much he missed this, and he deepened his kisses. She responded, just as passionately, just as eagerly, just as much in love with him, as he was with her.
Twelve minutes after they started to believe in forever again, they still believed in forever.
------
- end -
Note: If I had more time, I will definitely pad this out and hash it out a lot more. I like the idea I had but I have to admit I am not entirely 100% happy with the way it turned out and I struggled more than I thought. But it was a pinch hit and I was under time constraints...so. Yes. I may revise this one some time later :)
Comments, as per usual, = complete ♥
Pairing: Yamashita Tomohisa x Horikita Maki
Rating: PG
Summary: Twelve minutes, before and after, and they just didn't want to get hurt again.
A/N: Written for suboshiyui, part of je_whiteday. Stupid me thought White Day was March 12th, guess what, it's NOT! Bwuzzah. But flow with 12? Thank you.
Twelve minutes before their relationship ended, he didn't really see it coming.
He was in a club, unwinding after a very long day of work, endless interviews and tiring rehearsals. She called him then, and he missed three calls from her due to Ryo’s loud singing and Jin’s half-drunk antics, the overall deafening noise level, before he finally picked up and shouted a hello.
She said something and he couldn’t hear her the first time, and she spoke again - louder - and asked him where he was.
“I’m out with the guys.” And even though she didn’t ask him to elaborate, he could somehow sensed the tingling resentment that he was with them instead of with her, and so he found himself adding defensively. “It’s been a long and hard day, and I just want a drink.”
“Are you coming home?” Her words were quiet, and he just managed to hear her above the din.
“I’ll be late.” He said, his tone dismissive to an extent, but he thought she would, and she should understand - it had been too exhausting a day and he needed to relax.
“Tomo…” That was all he heard, for whatever she said next was drowned out by Jin’s loud shrieks as Kame slammed into him, and they both knocked into Yamapi, hysterical and drunk.
“Look, Maki - I’ll call. Later. And I’ll be home as soon as possible.”
She didn’t say anything in reply to that, she merely hung up the phone.
Twelve minutes later, his phone beeped with an incoming message.
But he didn’t hear the beep, didn’t see the message until he stumbled home three hours later, to find his apartment empty, dark and eerily quite. It was only when he pulled out his phone to call her, then only he saw the message - short and to the point.
I’m leaving. This is not working. Good bye.
He stared at the little lit screen, his head spinning with both confusion and alcohol, and he immediately pressed the button the call her, but her phone was switched off. He then called Meisa’s number, who picked up, and called him a fucking bastard, said that she hopes he rots in hell ten thousand times over, and then hung up on him.
Twelve minutes later, he hadn't moved.
Yamapi was still sitting in his living room, unable to find the strength to move, unable to do anything.
------
Twelve minutes before he saw her again, he didn't really expect to be seeing her.
It was a week after she ended their relationship, and it had been a week that he had done nothing constructive, and Jin was trying to get him out of his apartment.
“You can't hide in here forever.” Jin argued, with unusual reason (for him).
“Go away, Jin.” He said listlessly, flopped on his couch, unkempt and unshaven, pressing Maki's number over and over again, and hearing for the ten millionth time that she was not available. He wanted to work things out, he wanted to say he was sorry, he wanted to say a lot of things, but she wasn't giving him any chance to say anything.
“I'm running out of excuses as to why you're not showing up for work.”
“Tell them I'm dying. Or I died. Or something.”
“That's it.” Jin strode over to his prone form, and yanked him upright, so hard that Yamapi thought he might have dislocated his shoulder.
“What the fuck, Jin?!”
“I don't care, right now, you're going to get up, get dressed, and face the world like a man you're supposed to be, and not a worm. Get real, Pi. Life doesn't end here, no matter how stupidly melodramatic you want to be.” Jin's uncharacteristically sharp tones somehow managed to snap Yamapi back to some sort of reality. And although he wanted to retort how Jin never really knew what love is, he didn't, because at this point, he wasn't sure he knew what love is all about anyway, not as sure as he used to be.
And so he grudgingly found himself in Jin's car, heading back to work and not looking forward to it. As he headed into the building, Jin practically pushing him in, he nearly collided with two other people. He looked up to apologise, but the words died on his tongue when he saw himself looking at Maki - wearing a huge pair of sunglasses, and Meisa, a gigantic scowl on her face.
His heart raced, and flipped, and hundreds of emotions ran through him, and he thought she looked sort-of frail, and drawn and his heart started to hurt. He reached out for her, his fingers brushing against her sleeve, and his lips formed her name - Maki - and then she was gone, and his fingers grasped air, as Meisa planted herself between them, pushing Maki through the doorway.
“Don't even fucking think about it.” She hissed.
Twelve minutes later, he couldn't find her anywhere.
------
Twelve minutes before she called him, she knew she shouldn't be thinking about him.
That was the way that she could get her clean break, Meisa argued, and Maki knew that her best friend was right. She shouldn't think about him, but it was so hard when everything around her seemed to remind her of him, of them, of how things used to be between them, before work and stress and a lot of other unexplainable factors drove them apart. She remembered the good times, how they laughed and talked, how her hand always felt so small but safe in his, she remembered his face, his smile, his laugh, his kisses. She remembered the way they made love, the way he said her name, so endearing and breathy and full of affection, and how it felt like it was forever.
But at the same time, she remembered how they fell apart - how work just got to be too much, how they never get to see each other, and how Yamapi was often stressed and drinking, and not coming home till late. On her side, her commitments meant that she would have left early in the morning even before Yamapi woke up, still trying to recover from the late nights.
And gradually, they forgot how to talk to each other, they forgot how to be with each other, until that one last phone call, when she decided it just wasn't worth the effort anymore, not when they seemed to be pretending and going through the motions, not when they didn't seem like they want to be with each other anymore.
But some part of her held fast onto some part of them, and despite Meisa alternating between cajoling and threatening her, she picked up her phone, and she called him. And when she heard his voice, cracked, tired, flat and almost devoid of any emotion, sounding so unlike the Tomohisa she knew, she felt her chest hurting, and she thought it might be her heart.
Twelve minutes later, she thought she may stilll be in love with him.
------
Twelve minutes before she told him why, he knew he wanted her back.
“It doesn't seem like it was worth it anymore.” She said softly, tearing her napkin into little pieces, her eyes downwards, not looking at him.
“I thought...” he paused, thinking about what he should say, and he thought he should just said what he really felt. “I thought we're worth everything.”
“We were.” She said tiredly. “But you have to see the signs. You have to realise that we are not fighting to make this work. You don't come home earlier.”
“I...”
She held up her hand to stop him, continuing. “And despite Meisa's attitude, I know you're not the one to blame, entirely. I didn't try to schedule my work either, I didn't try to make time for you.”
Her words were true, he knew, and he understood that. What he didn't understand was why, why did they stop trying? Why?
“We grew apart.” She said simply. “Maybe that was the reason. We grew apart, and we don't need each other anymore.”
He shook his head, refusing to agree. “We can still make this work.” He interjected, his tone pleading.
She sighed. “We can't, Tomo. One day, you will realise that you don't need me, you don't need anybody.” She looked up at him, her gaze steady. “I don't want to get hurt again.”
He reached across the table, and took her hand. She tried to yank it out of his grip, but he held on, not letting her go.
“I'm sorry for not trying, I'm sorry for letting us go. I won't ever...” He took a deep breath, and lifted their clasped hands. “I won't ever let go. Again. We're worth it, Maki.”
Tears welled in her eyes despite her best efforts to control them, and he continued talking, determination etched upon his face. “Maybe somedays, we will fight, we will argue, we will disagree, and you will hate me. Maybe there will be a day when we feel that we don't need each other. But don't you see? All these are just days, random moments in our lives. It's not the rest of our lives, Maki.”
“Because I want to need you, and I want you to need me, for the rest of our lives.”
Looking into his eyes, she saw regret, she saw desperation, and most of all, she saw love, love, it was there, and she knew he was right.
She couldn't let go either.
Twelve minutes later, they knew they still loved each other.
------
Twelve minutes before he kissed her, he told her that he loved her.
After all the starts and stops, the apologies, the mistakes, and the efforts, after everything, only one fact remained, and that was that he loved her, plain and simple.
And she loved him.
And then he kissed her, lightly at first, and then he thought about how much he missed her, how much he missed this, and he deepened his kisses. She responded, just as passionately, just as eagerly, just as much in love with him, as he was with her.
Twelve minutes after they started to believe in forever again, they still believed in forever.
------
- end -
Note: If I had more time, I will definitely pad this out and hash it out a lot more. I like the idea I had but I have to admit I am not entirely 100% happy with the way it turned out and I struggled more than I thought. But it was a pinch hit and I was under time constraints...so. Yes. I may revise this one some time later :)
Comments, as per usual, = complete ♥