204: HimAWArI

[kokoronomelody]

Here it is!

Amuro Namie - HimAWArI

2000 Break The Rules

せめて昨日よりも
救ってちょっとだけ
愛とかじゃなくていい
ぬくもりだけでいいAt least more than yesterday,
It's helping just a little.
Without love it's alright.
Just warmth is fine.はじめて一人で住みだした
この部屋　いろいろ通り過ぎていった
ひまわりが似合う日ざし
いつからか　カーテン閉じたままの暗い闇It's the first time to live alone.
In this room too much has passed.
In the sunlight matching

Comments

[koi_yosei]

I like how your version is more poetic. ^_^ Especially the sunflower part. <3

I trip on the line "In kindness I was able to meet." It's not really a complete thought in english.

[kokoronomelody]

Yeah. I'm not sure what to do with that either.

やさしさに　出会えたこともある

"I had the experiance of meeting you with kindness" maybe?

Megchan wrote, "There were times I met with tenderness."

I don't know. I need more practice translating.

[vanessaewing]

this is awesome and very very good :) i like it

[baka_kaba]

you did a really nice job, especially if you were shooting for more literal.

that's always the thing with translating - nuance is so important. and in doing a song (or poem), putting together complete ideas requires you to know not just a lot of japanese, but a LOT of english so you know just the right word to fit the particular idea that is being conveyed and not just the literal construction.

so it's hard to compare the two. i think you did a fine literal translation that makes more or less perfect sense and captures the central ideas. i think megchan probably captured more of the nuance of each line and the song as a whole (but she may have taken a little TOO much license with some of her expanded vocabulary).