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I don't want to be me anymore. I want a change. A major one. I just want to show how I feel inside. I want people to see me for who I really am. None of my friends know who I am. They don't care. All of them want to be part of this big production that the world is taking part in, when I'd rather be the person off on the side watching them ( Read more... )

I so bought a Santa Clause hat today ( Read more... )

I hate you. I hate you for who you are. For how you make me feel. I hate you for making me cry at night, for wanting to sleep eternally. I shouldn't have to feel like this...and I want to be done. But I can't. It's not that easy. The past is not our future, and the future should not be our past. But we can't change what is what - and so we ( Read more... )

The weekend was spent with Johnny Bravo. He came to the University and we had a really nice time together. Friday night we watched "Jack Frost" together and fell asleep in one another's arms. I've always considered that a very intimate, important aspect of a relationship of any type, and so I somewhat fear doing so with someone, but nonetheless ( Read more... )

one day I'll learn. and then I'll be able to save the world.

One year ago yesterday my grandfather died. He was 80 years old. I can still remember every last detail of what happened the morning that he passed away ( Read more... )

Nothing makes me smile more than when a boy steps out of culinary just to call to see if you're feeling better. ::sigh:: How can things be going so well?

I worked yesterday on the ambulance - I hadn't ridden my usual shift of 18 hours (Noon, Saturday, until 6am Sunday) since I left for University in the fall. Either way, it was real nice to be with Sue, my EMS partner and close friend, again ( Read more... )

I spent the afternoon yesterday driving to Johnny Bravo's house - now, this was supposed to be an hour and a half drive, however, it turned out to be a five hour adventure for me as I decided to take the Turnpike, and well, BIG MISTAKE. But, the mistake was well worth what sat at the end of my journey ( Read more... )