My Last Train: Chapter 6
Title: My Last Train
Fandom: Kanjani8, NewS
Pairing: Nishikido Ryo x Uchi Hiroki, Nishikido Ryo x Ohkura Tadayoshi
Rating: NC-17 for the previous chap, but not this one. It's pretty safe. ;P
And NO I don't own anything except from the plot, not even the title is mine!
Summary: Ryo struggles with what his and Uchi's relationship has turned into. He needs a brake to think. He still loves Uchi but he ends up unable to go back and tell him.
WOOOT! ^__^ A fast update! :D AND also we will finally see Uchi and Ryo meet! :D I'm so excited, aren't you? This chapter is from Ryo's POV. But you could probably already guess that. Anyway, without any further ado, please read and enjoy chapter 6! (OMG already at chapter 6??)
Chapter 6 - Confusion
It was so goddamn frustrating. All of it could just go to hell. Why was it that he had to go trough something like this. Was it some kind of punishment for living a bad life? He couldn't even answer that, he knew nothing of what kind of person he used to be. He knew only a fraction, a few things that he'd collected from his dreams, mostly nightmares and also some stories he'd heard from the people who knew him before everything went away. His head hurt again, it was more often and more intense recently. Or rather, since Uchi Hiroki came into his life. Or should he say, returned.
' It was a nice day outside he noted, the sunshine making the autumn leaves look like they were made of gold. A content smile absentmindedly forming as he looked outside his window. “Maybe I can ask Ohkura to let me go outside for a while today.?” If he remembered correctly Yasuda had told him that Ohkura would return from whatever it was he had been doing for a the last couple of days. He hoped that he would come back soon, before the sun set. He felt much better now, most of the swelling from the operation was gone and the bruises was also steadily fading away more each day. Of course the broken leg still hurt from time to time, but as long as he had some painkilling drugs running through his body it really wasn't that bad and he'd been informed that he probably would be able to get around in a wheelchair before the week was over.
As he was sitting there in his bed, not really thinking about anything in particular he heard a knock on the door. “Come in” he replied expecting it to be Yasuda or one of the other nurses checking in on him. He was happily surprised to see Ohkura in the doorway. “Ohkura. You're back!” He smiled a brilliant smile, Ohkura had only been gone for two days but as he was used to seeing him several times a day he'd started to feel a little lonely without the other at the side of his bed, telling him silly things that was going on in the world outside the hospital. Then he noticed, something was off. His doctor and friend didn't look happy, he even sensed some nervousness from him. He was just about to ask what was wrong as two other men entered the room. Now his smile was exchanged with a confused frown as he eyed the new faces. One of them looked like he was about to cry and the other just stood there staring at him with penetrating eyes. The later suddenly moved towards him and embraced him in a desperate hug “Ryo... I'm. I'm so sorry Ryo”
Ryo? What was this, it felt familiar. Could it be his name? Ryo, that was what he was called. He could feel his cheeks getting sticky. The other man had started crying, making both their faces wet of tears. “I'm so sorry. Please forgive me.” The tone in the strangers voice made his stomach turn, he hated that this man was sad and crying. He didn't know why, all he knew was that it affected him. Still, he was starting to feel uncomfortable, so he tried to withdraw himself from the others arms. “I'm really sorry. I'm guessing that you know me. But...” He swallowed hard, a lump in his throat made it hard to speak. “...I don't remember who you are.” '
That man had looked so devastated when Ryo had told him that. Those eyes would subconsciously pop into his thoughts whenever he was left alone, making his heart ache and his head hurt. It had been three weeks since the accident, and five days since he met Uchi and Koyama. He was just starting to get used to being called Ryo instead of Hiro. That's right, he was no longer Hiro, that was Uchi now. Ohkura had told him about how he'd taken the name Hiro from Hiroki. A name he had said before going into surgery, before the empty darkness of no memories. His real identity was Nishikido Ryo, a twenty-five year old actor, born and raised in Osaka but currently living in Tokyo. He sighed deeply holding his head in a tight grip, as if to keep it from floating away.
' “Hiro...” Ohkura sat down on his usual chair beside him. “Ah, that's right. I guess I should call you Nishikido-kun from now on.” A weak and somewhat fake smile was hinted on the doctors face. “Don't say that, nothing has changed except my name. Please call me Ryo” Ryo's voice had a speck of anger as he said this. He'd thought Ohkura would know him well enough to figure something like that out on his own. Somehow that made Ryo a little disappointed. “Okay” It was a simple reply, as most of Ohkura's was. But that in combination with the no longer faked but now genuine smile was enough for Ryo's anger to melt away.
Ryo suddenly started to feel a little shy, and an almost invisible blush was now tainting his cheeks, but he had made up his mind to ask a long time ago. And it wasn't really that much of a deal anyway. Still, he couldn't quite look Ohkura in the eyes as he voiced out his question. “Then... If you're going to call me Ryo. Is it okay for me to... I mean.” He was stuck. Damn it! But it didn't matter because before he had a chance to collect his thoughts he could feel Ohkuras hand in his. “You can call me Tadayoshi if you want...” At this Ryo looked in the others direction even though he knew that that would mean that Ohkura would clearly be able to see his now fully flushed face. Their eyes met and Ryo couldn't look away as if drawn into the others hazel coloured orbs by an unknown force. It felt as time had stopped.
He didn't know if they sat there for seconds or minutes. Maybe even hours. But suddenly Ohkura leans forward and Ryo can feel him place a soft kiss on his forehead. “I've got to go” The taller man stands up. “I'll be in Subaru's room if you need me.” With Ryo still in shock he doesn't react fast enough to stop Ohkura from leaving. As the doors closes behind his friend, Ryo can still feel the lingering warmth and softness of the kiss. He smiles. '
Now when he thought about it... After that he'd started to get butterflies every time Ohkura came to visit, which was quite often, but still not enough in Ryo's opinion. Nothing had really happened since that pretty innocent kiss, but he still felt happier whenever Ohkura was around. Still, there was something that kept him from being content with the whole situation. Or rather someone.
' “I'll leave you alone” Ohkura said as he bowed towards the man called Uchi and then he gave Ryo an encouraging nod before turning around and leaving the room closing the door behind him. As soon as Ohkura's steps could no longer be heard a suffocating silence filled the room. Ryo didn't know what to do. He'd just met this man yesterday and was still melting the news of his real identity.
They hadn't talked much the day before as the doctors thought it best to let him process the whole thing a little. He'd pretty much only been told his real name and identity and then a hasty introduction of his forgotten friends before Yokoyama-sensei had come in to interrupt and requested to talk to Uchi and Koyama and for them to fill in some paperwork. Ohkura had stayed for a short moment to explain it clearer. Telling Ryo what had happened and how he'd searched for Uchi and then found him. It was amazing that all that happened just yesterday, everything had suddenly changed. Ryo looked up. Uchi still hadn't said a word.
After maybe five minutes of nothing but awkward silence Uchi finally opens his mouth to speak. “So you really don't remember me huh?” A weak laugh followed, but it was clear to Ryo that Uchi didn't laugh because he found the whole situation funny. He doesn't know what to say so he just answers with a simple “Sorry” and he truly means it.
“It's me who should say I'm sorry.” It's somehow sudden. Uchi's words baffle him. “What do you mean?” Once again tears trickle down the younger mans face, falling down wetting Ryo's sheets. “I treated you like crap for so long...” At this moment Uchi looks really beautiful to him, sad and somewhat fragile, but beautiful. He doesn't say anything, afraid that it would break the person sitting before him. He wants Uchi to continue at his own pace. “We used to love each other so much. I don't know why I acted as I did. I guess I was just angry and then directed that anger the wrong way...” Uchi looked straight at him now. “...At you, Ryo” Some time during Uchi's speech he must have started crying too, because he could feel his face being wet and warm. “I'm so sorry Ryo.” His whole body was shaking and Ryo was afraid that he would truly break any second now. Then Uchi reached out and swept Ryo into a hug. He was surprised at first, but slowly he started to return the hug. “I love you Ryo.” He didn't know what to say. “I love you so much. Please forgive me.” Even though Ryo himself had no idea of what Uchi had really done, he knew that he couldn't hate this person in his arms. And so he said, almost in a whisper. “I forgive you.” '
He'd learned that he and Uchi had been together as a couple for more than five years. He'd truly loved Uchi, and they had lived happy together. Koyama-kun had told him this during one of his visits. Told him about happenings and memories he'd lost. It was easy for him to talk to the older man and he truly felt like a friend already. They talked about daily things like how awful the hospital food was or how it would probably start to snow any day now, and of course also a lot about Ryo's past life. And even though the other made him feel comfortable and at ease it felt more as if he was told made up stories of unknown people rather than memories of himself and forgotten friends.
' He laughed heartily “It's true! I swear that guy never dared to show his face in that club ever since!” Koyama was laughing too. “I guess I can be kinda scary, huh?” Koyama just nodded and smiled happily. “Yeah. Well at least when people try to steal Uchi away from you” Koyama noted his mistake a little late, Ryo's smile disappeared. “Ah, I'm sorry Ryo-chan. I didn't think about what I said.” Another voice answer before Ryo has the chance. “Nothing new there.” They both turn to face the so far unnoticed visitor. Koyama's boyfriend was standing there smiling at them. “Ah, Kato-kun. Ohayo.” The lawyer took a few steps closer and pulled out a chair to sit on at the same time placing a basket of apples on the bed. “I've told you to call me Shige. It feels weird for you to call me Kato-kun.” Ryo nods slightly embarrassed. “So how are you?” It made Ryo feel all warm inside when he thought about how good friends he had. Even though he more or less just started to know them it somehow felt safe to have them there. ”I'm able to move around in a wheelchair now, so it feels good to be able to leave this room sometimes. Tadayoshi said he would take me outside later since it's pretty warm today” At his words he saw how the two lovers exchanged secretive looks with each other, possibly looking a little worried. But the moment only lasted for a couple of seconds or less, so it was probably nothing serious. He decided to ignore it and stole back the apple that Koyama had taken from the basket “Hey! These are for me!” '
Ryo could hear movement outside and was just about to ask out loud when he heard a knock and then the door opened to reveal doctor Yokoyama fallowed by Tadayoshi. “Good day Yokoyama-sensei. Why...” But he came no further before he noticed that the younger doctor was acting out of character, he didn't look at him, was hiding the right side of his face and had yet to make any sign of recognition towards Ryo. It was Yokoyama who spoke to him first. “I'm here to inform you that from now on, you'll have another doctor assigned to you.” He didn't understand. Why would they replace Ohkura? It didn't make any sense. He was the most comfortable with Tadayoshi as his doctor, there was no reason to change. “Eh? Why? I don't wa...” He was interrupted by the older doctor. “I'm sorry. It's already decided. Your new doctor is Murakami-sensei, he's as capable as any.” Yokoyama then looks over to where Tadayoshi is standing in silence. “That was all.” He gives Ohkura's a sympathetic pat on the shoulder before leaving the both of them alone in the room.
“Tadayoshi, what's going on?” It takes a while before he gets an answer, it worries him. More so when Ohkura refuses to look at him even after he finally speaks. “I'm sorry Ryo. I... I did something very unprofessional.” The statement makes Ryo frown. “What do you...?” Now Ohkura turns around to look at him and he's surprised to see that the man before him has a cracked lip and an aspiring bruise on the right cheek. “It looks painful.” Somehow Ohkura must have found that answer funny because he's laughing now. “What? I don't see what's so funny?” Despite saying that he can't quite keep his face straight, the corners of his mouth threatening to turn upwards. “I mean isn't it obvious that it would hurt? That's the first thing you say? Really? It looks like it hurts? Why not ask what happened instead?” They keep laughing for awhile, even though he doesn't really know why. It just feels good. Besides, if Ohkura is laughing like this it can't be that bad right? “Okay then... So what really did happened?”
It's from Ryo's POV again, but this time its after he remembers! ^w^ What did Ohkura do to get that bruised up face? Hmm, well I guess they match now. ;P I already know the most important things that will happen in the next chapter. But that is unfortunately not a guarantee for it to be a fast update. I hope it will.. But you never know. :S Anyway, it felt good to update fast. When you're happy i'm happy too! Pleeeease comment! It makes me more motivated and also VERY VERY HAPPY! :D BTW. I wrote the whole chapter in one day... That's my excuse if you don't like it! ;P
Also be aware that English isn't my first language, so I apologize if there are any annoying errors. ^^'''
Please comment, it's what keeps me motivated! :D So if you like it remember to comment, constructive critique is also welcome... But that doesn't mean you have to be overly evil! *just joking* ^_^