Second Best (3/3)
Title: Second Best (3/3)
Author: glambertfan
Rating: pg-13, mostly for language
Warnings: language, angst
Pairing: Kradam, Adam/Drake and Kris/Katy mentioned
Disclaimer: Adam and Kris are their own people, they do not belong to me (unfortunately), they belong to themselves, 19E and each other.
Authors Note: I'm back! Sorry it took so long, after surgery I had a lot to catch up on and then blah blah blah I had writer's block (thanks to mrsmaggiemae for fixing that). Also, this is totally un-related, but does anyone know why my mood theme isn't showing up when I post to the comm? It shows up when I post to my journal..... Also, I just wanted to point out that this is actually a PREQUEL to Not Yet, I Just Love You and Sleeping In, links to which can be found at the end of the first section.
Summary: Kris won't settle for second best.
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
When Adam finally woke up the next morning Kris was no longer in the bed with him. Raising his head off his pillow he looked around for the other man. A small smile played across Adam’s lips when he found him, standing by the window, staring out into the early morning light. Feeling Adam’s gaze, Kris turned towards him, face solemn. “Sleep alright?” he asked quietly.
“Yeah. Yeah, thanks.” Adam replied, running his hand through his hair humbly. Both men averted their gaze and tried to come up with something to say.
“Why do you put up with it?” Kris finally asked, breaking the silence that had fallen between them.
“Put up with what?” Adam asked, getting out of bed and walking towards the window where Kris stood.
“With Drake. With the fighting. It’s affecting you.” Adam opened his mouth to utter some form of denial but Kris cut him off. “Don’t lie to me, I can see it.”
“He’s a good guy. I mean, he means well, it’s just, it’s difficult, ya know? No, actually, you don’t know, do you? You found the person you’re meant to be with. But really, he’s a good guy.” Adam shrugged and joined Kris in staring out the window.
“You could do better.”
At first Adam wasn’t sure he’d heard his friend properly. Once he’d assured himself that, yes, Kris had actually said that, he moved on to trying to convince himself that Kris couldn’t possibly mean what he thought, what he wanted, him to mean. “What?” His voice came out choked as his eyes searched out Kris’.
“You could do better,” he repeated, louder, eyes boring into Adam’s. Adam felt his breath hitch in the moment before Kris broke eye contact and retreated to the bathroom. It was a coward’s move and he knew it, but he also knew that he wasn’t going to put himself any further out there until Adam made some sort of a move of his own. Kris’ life was already turning into one huge mess; his marriage, he realized, was effectively over, his career was taking over his life, and he couldn’t stop thinking about Adam. Kris closed his eyes and scratched the side of his neck, sighing to himself as he contemplated his next move. It was becoming abundantly clear to Kris that Adam had been correct in assuming that he’d found the person he was meant to be with but that the fallacy of his logic lay in the assumption that that person was Katy. But Adam is with Drake. I can’t ruin two relationships in one go. Kris thought to himself. The first step, he knew, no matter what came of the Adam situation, was to call his wife.
In any other situation Kris would try to work things out with Katy, would try to honor his vows. This, however, was not something that could be worked through. This, Kris realized, was one of those times in a person’s life when he meets someone and is changed so thoroughly that he will never be the same, nothing can ever change him back. Even if nothing were going to happen with Adam Kris knew that he could not lead on his wife like that. Katy was such a sweet, wonderful person and she deserved to be loved, respected, honored, worshiped even. He set his shoulders and dialed the familiar number, waiting anxiously for Katy to answer, as he knew she would.
“Katy? We need to talk.”
To say that Kris’ demeanor was subdued over the next few days would be an understatement. Katy and he had spoken for a long time, Kris repentant and Katy tearful but understanding, before coming to the consensus that a divorce would be the best route. Secretly Kris had hoped that Adam would take his hint and make a move, or at the very least end his tumultuous relationship with Drake. Apparently, though, God didn’t like him that much this week. The fact that Adam’s eyes never once met Kris’ was odd enough on its own, but the distance, the physical distance, he kept between the two at all times was starting to drive Kris insane.
More days passed and the only thing that changed was Adam. Their relationship had somehow gone from carefree to strained almost overnight and the other Idols were noticing. One day, about a week and a half after Kris had caved to his baser instincts and called his wife, pleading for forgiveness and asking ever-so-kindly for a divorce, Allison finally got up the courage to ask him what was going on.
“Krissy, I’m worried, you two are acting strange, did you have a fight?” the fear in the fiery teen’s eyes was almost too much for Kris, he almost spilled the entire situation to her overly-eager ears.
“Not, not exactly.” He settled for a vague answer instead of risking giving too much away.
“Do you think it’s because of Drake?”
“Why would it be because of Drake?” Kris’ interest had officially been tweaked.
“Well, Adam said they’d been fighting even more. From what I can tell it’s been pretty much constant for the past week or so.” For the past week or so Kris repeated in his head, trying to piece together what was going on. He felt a little like he was trying to finish a jigsaw when half the pieces were missing and a handful of the ones he had belonged to a different picture.
That night Kris entered the hotel room to find Adam sitting on his bed, twisting one of his many rings around his finger, obviously waiting for Kris. He entered the room and shut the door gently behind him, hoping that Adam was finally about to tell him that he’d left Drake, if not for Kris’ sake than at least for his own. When Adam looked up at Kris his expression was predatory. He stood up and closed the distance between them in two steps, forcing Kris up against the door. He clamped his mouth down upon Kris’ hungrily and it took all of Kris’ strength to push the taller singer off.
“Adam.” The name had passed through his lips a hundred million times, but never quite like this. His voice was hard, angry, determined. “Stop avoiding me.”
“What’s up with you lately? First you’re all depressed and now you’re angry. It isn’t like you.” Adam’s attempt to lighten the mood fell flat. Talking with Kris was supposed to be fun, easy, enjoyable, not tense, difficult and torturous.
“Are you still with Drake?”
“Does it matter?”
“Does…does it matter?” Kris spat, anger rising. “Of course it frickin’ matters!” Adam looked at him as if he’d been smacked across the face. Hard. “For weeks you’ve been fighting with that…that…that bastard. You fight and he hurts you and you come to me, to me, for comfort and compassion and then you run right the fuck back to him!” Adam’s eyes flared wide at Kris’ use of such a harsh word. “I don’t get it, Adam. He hurts you over and over and you just don’t seem to care. And what am I? Some sort of consolation prize? ‘Sorry your boyfriend’s being an ass, but hey, at least you can go drive your roommate crazy now!’? I won’t be your second choice, Adam.”
“Yeah, well, I ab-so-fucking-lutely love being Katy’s understudy!” Adam’s surprise had quickly turned to an anger that matched Kris’ so completely it would be funny if they weren’t so mad.
“Ok, then. Congratulations. For your information, in case you even care anymore, the lead has left the show, exit stage left or whatever. Katy and I are getting a divorce.” Adam’s anger melted as quickly as it had come at the word ‘divorce’.
“Kris,” he tried.
“Don’t, just, don’t. Like I said, I won’t be your second choice.”
“You never were.”
“I…what?” Kris stared at Adam, now completely and utterly perplexed at the turn their conversation had taken.
“You were never my second choice, Kris.” Adam muttered, rubbing his eyes in exhaustion, from the tour, from the constant fighting with Drake, from the effort it took to keep himself away from Kris, from everything. “Drake was a distraction, something to keep my mind off of you. Something to keep me from having to constantly remind myself of the thousands of reasons why I couldn’t have you. Drake was the consolation prize.”
“So what are you going to do now that you don’t have to settle?” Kris asked, half wanting to hear the answer and half afraid of the rejection he was still waiting for.
“This,” Adam said, pulling out his cell phone and dialing a number quickly. He held the phone to his ear and waited for an answer. “Drake? Look, we should talk.” When those three words tumbled from Adam’s freckled lips Kris knew that everything was going to change, that Adam was taking a risk for him. He suddenly felt as though he might explode in a fit of excitement and out-right joy.