Nature's First Green
Title: Nature's First Green
Author: Tanndell
Rating: PG-13
Pairings(s): Adam/Kris, Adam/Drake, Adam/Cassidy, past Adam/Brad
Word Count: 3,000
Disclaimer: I don’t own any real people. That would be awkward. Title is taken from Robert Frost’s Nothing Gold Can Stay.
Beta: (condancer who was a rock star and supported me through my amateurish attempts.
Summary: Adam may be the Jew, but Brad is definitely the Yenta
Brad may be young, but he sure as hell isn’t stupid. You don’t survive Texas if you’re small and twinky and very very gay if you aren’t smart, and you don’t survive LA period if you aren’t savvy. Brad’s pretty sure he’s both. He’s also pretty sure that his ex-boyfriend is neither. Now, Brad loves Adam, it’s next to impossible not to, but for a beautiful, brilliant, talented man with a razor sharp tongue and a cutting sense of humour, Adam can be extraordinarily naive. Brad wonders sometimes how Adam survived LA, with its manipulative poseurs and its negative vibes. He suspects that Adam bulldozed his way into people’s hearts with his sweet shy smile, and then just stayed there regardless of how they felt about it. It would be typical of Adam to do that, hell he did it with Brad didn’t he? That’s probably why Brad really wants to see Adam happy, because an unhappy Adam is not a concept that he can fathom without his heart skipping a beat. He knows that he isn’t the one to do it. He isn’t the forever kind of boy, at least not yet, and Adam is more romantic than a bosom heaving heroine from his Mama’s bodice rippers. It’s all about the gestures with Adam, big ones, little ones, ones of indeterminate size, and Brad knows, he just knows, that if he’d stuck with Adam, the gestures would only get larger, and more extravagant until the pressures of the expectations would have broken Brad, broken them, broken Adam, and that is just not acceptable.
So, he called it quits, and watched Adam’s face crumple, but Brad is smart and he knows that whatever Adam suffered then, it’s not as bad as what he would have gone through if Brad hadn’t pulled the plug, and he doesn’t use it as an excuse, but he uses it as some kind of consolation as he watches Adam walk away, his shoulders bowed, his spine curved, his head down, and those aren’t tears in Brad’s eyes, it’s just glitter or maybe dust.
It’s a death, but a clean one, and eventually everyone gives up their sackcloth and ashes, and it’s time for a good old fashioned wake. In LA, that means six martinis, a bowl of the good stuff, and a tearful reunion in the backroom of some club, with music throbbing through their veins and the strobes blinding their drink-dulled eyes. Adam doesn’t cry easily, and Brad is even worse, but the choice was between tears and make-up sex, and they both tacitly agreed the former was a better idea. They can talk again, and that’s more of a relief than Brad can allow himself to admit to. There are jokes only Adam gets, and sly references that only Adam can make and Brad missed them desperately when they were gone. Things are never normal between them, things never were, but things are good, and that’s the most Brad can expect. They’re both ready now to move on with their lives, investigate new pastures and try to find what each of them had always been looking for. Or at least that’s what Brad thinks. Brad realizes he’s wrong when he notices that Adam hasn’t gotten laid in three months.
This seems unfathomable to Brad, because it’s Adam, Adam who, when they met, smiled dreamy-slow and wicked-soft, eyes signalling immediate primal desire. Brad’s seen people react to Adam when they don’t even know that they’re doing it, seduced by his thrilling voice, his gentle hands, his hypnotic eyes, and when Adam reacts back it can be magical. So, if Adam isn’t having sex, then there’s something seriously wrong, and Brad knows beyond the shadow of a doubt that he has to fix it, that he’s the only one who can.
First rule to fixing Adam is to identify the root cause of the problem, and Brad thinks he knows the answer to this one. Once Adam’s gone monogamous, there’s no going back. No more one night stands, no more exciting flings, Adam is looking for something more stable, more permanent, more forever. If Brad can’t give him that, Brad can look for someone who can. He knows a lot of men, and some of them are even Adam’s type. He’s seen Adam look, even though he scrupulously never touched. He enlists Scarlett and Lee to help in the hunt. They know Adam almost as well as he does, they love him almost as much, and they want to see him happy too. Well, in Lee’s case, he mostly just wants to see Adam less sexually frustrated, but Brad knows how to work with what he can get. They put their heads together, and come up with what they all agree would be the perfect match, a man they all know and like, Cassidy Haley.
Adam may deny it vehemently, but everyone knows that he has a type, and that Brad was the epitome of it. He likes them intelligent and quirky and funny, he likes them small and slender and brunet. He likes them opinionated and flexible, adventurous and uninhibited. He’ll take Southern if he can get it, but he can do without. Cassidy lives up to most of the standards that Brad sets. Brad can admit without rancour that while he may be wittier than Cassidy (and he really thinks he is), he can’t begin to touch him for sheer creative talent. Cassidy is an artist and a musician, who grew up steeped in a culture that Brad is still trying to negotiate. The Bay Area and Texas are worlds apart, and Cassidy is San Fran in a beautiful body. He has less issues and hang-ups than anyone Brad’s ever known, and can only be good for Adam. Brad thinks he has a winner.
When he first subtly directs Cassidy towards Adam, he feels a twinge of jealousy, followed by a rush of vindication, as Cassidy laughs up at Adam, and Adam tilts his head, blue eyes glittering in the darkness and responds with a chuckle of his own. They get along swimmingly well, talking about fashion trends and music with the familiarity of true fanatics. Cassidy brings out his guitar, Adam sings some good old mellow tunes and the chemistry is palpable. As the evening comes to a close, Cassidy obviously offers, and with a slight flush of awkwardness, Adam agrees. Brad watches them leave together, walking close to each other, obviously deep in conversation, and hopes Cassidy realizes how fucking lucky he is.
It takes off from there. Adam is almost like a muse for Cassidy, who studies him intently, sketching for him, singing to him. They are so comfortable so quickly that even Brad is amazed. The fact that Adam seems content, if not rhapsodic, is driven home to him one evening when he drops by Adam’s place to find Cassidy ensconced in the chair that once belonged to him, as Adam gets dressed for a night on the town, both of them laughing about Adam’s increasingly outlandish choices. Brad is pleased, if a little regretful, but mostly pleased.
Cassidy and Adam don’t last as long as Brad thought they would. It’s just a month or two of whirlwind romance, almost like a vacation that they both seem to need. Brad doesn’t know Cassidy’s dating history, and quite frankly doesn’t really care, but it wouldn’t surprise him at all if he was recovering from a broken heart. The two of them really seem to enjoy their time together, they part as good friends, meet with bright smiles and lingering hugs. The sex, Adam tells him in confidence, was great, and Adam seems mostly healed from whatever was troubling him. But he still refuses to hook up, no longer seems to be the man he was before Brad ended their relationship, and so Brad can’t give up, can’t stop looking for someone to fill the place that he created and then left empty in Adam’s soul.
It takes some time before Brad zeroes in on the next possibility. His name is Drake, Drake Labry and he is so sweet that he makes Brad’s teeth hurt sometimes. Brad prefers his own men with more edge to them, and he knows Adam used to as well. But the times are different now, they are different and the soft spoken N’awlins boy would be good for Adam, Brad just knows it. Adam needs stability, more than he ever has before perhaps. American Idol is a big fucking deal, and while Adam plays it cool like he always does, Brad can tell that he’s nervous. Adam knows he can sing, he’d have to be insane not to know that, but Adam also knows that America would be intimidated by him, by the hair and the clothes and the make-up, the queer image and the queer lifestyle that is a part of who he is, sexual orientation and all. He’s getting ready to face rejection on the grand scale, and Brad, Danielle, Scarlett and all the rest can be there for him, but he needs more, so much more and maybe, just maybe, Brad thinks, Drake would be right for the rest.
Adam has known Drake for a while, so it takes him some time to catch on that in his quiet way Drake is offering more than just friendship. Brad is rather proud of the way he directed Drake towards Adam, actually. Unlike Cassidy, who knew exactly what he was doing, Drake has to be tutored, but once pushed, is perfect. Things come to a head one evening a few weeks into Idol, when Adam, exhausted and anguished, calls Brad, leaving a message so urgent, that Brad immediately calls back. When he hears what’s wrong, Brad realizes that once again it’s partially his fault that Adam sounds like that, lost and just a little undone.
Pictures have surfaced of the two of them together. Those were their golden days, when they were so wrapped up in each other that they could block out the world. Brad knows, he has always known, that honeymoons don’t last forever, and nothing gold can stay, but he never realized that the fallout would be so devastating for Adam. But Adam, brave Adam, manages somehow to hold steadfast, consoling Brad, insisting that he’ll either go through honest or go out honest, but he will not compromise. Brad can’t give him what he needs, he just can’t, but maybe Drake can, so the next call is to Drake, and the cues are given. Drake picks up on them like a pro and when a few weeks later, Brad sees Drake in the American Idol audience, sitting with Adam’s family, and applauding him like a trouper, Brad knows that he got it right this time.
Adam still calls him all the time though, just to talk, and it’s a relief to know that their friendship hasn’t been diluted by the new budding relationship or the pressures of American Idol. That’s how he knows that Adam is taking it slow this time with Drake, not making any promises and not expecting any in return. That’s also how he knows all about Kris Allen. Brad sees it as the ultimate irony that Adam’s straight, married roommate is physically Adam’s type on a stick. If it hadn’t been for Drake, Brad might have been a little nervous about it, because Adam does not need to be falling for straight boys at this point, no matter how sweet. But Drake is in the picture, and while clearly Adam and Kris have become fast friends, the kind of friends you can only be in times of war, plague or reality TV competitions, there doesn’t seem to be a threat, not one that Brad can see anyway.
This is why nothing that Adam says in his Rolling Stones interview comes as a surprise to Brad, though the way the media picks up on his crush on Kris is both hilarious and mildly insulting. But Brad does get a lump in his throat when Adam says in interview after interview that he has only been in love once. Maybe it’s a little selfish, but it’s a hell of a thing to be loved like that, and he doesn’t really want to be forgotten just yet.
When the tour starts, Adam’s so madly busy that their calls slowly drop off, but Brad keeps himself updated via twitter and the internet. He finds ontd_ai in particular most informative about the minutiae of Adam’s life. He also finds them very funny, which is just an added bonus. That’s how he knows about the concerts that Drake attends, the messages that Adam exchanges with his present boyfriend. Through second hand information he tracks the relationship that he initiated, and watches it deepen, feeling rather proud of his choice when he sees them holding hands in public. Of course the fan forums also track Kris Allen assiduously, and again Brad feels a twinge of concern when he sees the looks Kris and Adam exchange, one watching with awed fascination, the other with warm affection, but the warning bells are tamped down every time he sees pictures of Kris’s pretty wife, or pictures of Adam with Drake. Soon the tour is over and Brad manages to put those thoughts entirely out of his mind.
Adam is back in LA now, and so is Drake and Brad sees something of them now, though not very much, since Adam’s busy recording for his album. But every single time they meet, Brad is hardpressed not to interrogate him on the progress of the relationship. It appears to be doing rather well, but Adam and Drake are both being very closemouthed about it, and Brad’s attempts at pushing for more information have been singularly unsuccessful. Neil tells him under a vow of secrecy that he feels Drake can’t handle the pressures, the odd hours, the constant media attention, the examination of every action, but so far Drake seems to be coping with a fair amount of grace, and Brad lets himself hope.
It isn’t till nearly six months later after the album is out and has already gone platinum and Adam’s tour is imminent, that Brad has to admit that Neil (as he so often is, the little prick) was right. Adam doesn’t even tell him himself. Alisan calls him to say that Drake’s left, gone back to Louisiana, overwhelmed by the last six months and the way they’ve affected his life. Brad tries to call Adam, but the phone goes to voicemail, and Brad remembers the stories that Alisan told him about how Adam had been after their relationship had ended. He goes over immediately to Adam’s house, his beautiful new house that Drake had helped him decorate, but when he gets there he realizes his presence is superfluous.
The tableau that greets him is the one he has hoped can be avoided. Kris is seated on the couch, and Adam is on the floor, his head resting on Kris’s knee. Kris gently runs his hand through Adam’s hair, and Adam’s eyes are closed, tear tracks still visible on his face. The look on Kris’s face is not one that is usually demonstrated by friends, it’s heartbreakingly tender, even vulnerable, and when he raises his head to look at Brad, there’s an expression in his eyes that Cassidy didn’t have and Drake didn’t have. It’s an expression Brad knows well, he saw it in the mirror for more than a year, and if there’s one thing that he can be sure off, it’s that Kris Allen is a better man than he will ever be. Brad leaves quietly, there’s nothing else he can do.
Despite all his good intentions to not interfere in Adam’s life again, Brad just can’t resist calling Kris who agrees to a meeting immediately. Brad’s tactics have to be different this time, because Kris is a different kettle of fish altogether. So, for a change, he goes with total honesty. Lays all the cards on the table, and tells Kris to either man up or get out. Kris mans up. He doesn’t make a single move on Adam for a year, lets Adam get his head together, stands solidly by his side for the entire time. After that he gets the most amicable divorce in the world from his beautiful wife, who understands that there is no room for three people in one relationship, and he lets Adam return the favour of support and succour. Then with Brad’s blessing he goes ahead and makes his move, and for the first time in three years or more, Brad sees the look that he’s been missing so fucking much return to Adam’s face, the look of a man who’s just caught his first glimpse of Paradise. Brad hopes that this time it’s there for keeps. He wishes that he could have kept that look on Adam’s face forever, but he likes the thought that he played a role, no matter how small, in putting it there. Adam will always be one of his dearest friends, and seeing Adam happy, which Kris clearly makes him, lets Brad go on with his life without any guilt. He may have some regrets, but Cheeks usually deals with those, he loves LA and LA loves him, the sex is great, the scenes are great and Adam will be ok. Brad is ready to move on.
Sometimes Brad wonders if Adam still thinks of him, thinks of them at all. That question is quickly answered. The first interview Adam gives after he and Kris declare their relationship, he tells Time Magazine that he has only been in love twice in his life. Brad knows then that he will never be forgotten.
Author: Tanndell
Rating: PG-13
Pairings(s): Adam/Kris, Adam/Drake, Adam/Cassidy, past Adam/Brad
Word Count: 3,000
Disclaimer: I don’t own any real people. That would be awkward. Title is taken from Robert Frost’s Nothing Gold Can Stay.
Beta: (condancer who was a rock star and supported me through my amateurish attempts.
Summary: Adam may be the Jew, but Brad is definitely the Yenta
Brad may be young, but he sure as hell isn’t stupid. You don’t survive Texas if you’re small and twinky and very very gay if you aren’t smart, and you don’t survive LA period if you aren’t savvy. Brad’s pretty sure he’s both. He’s also pretty sure that his ex-boyfriend is neither. Now, Brad loves Adam, it’s next to impossible not to, but for a beautiful, brilliant, talented man with a razor sharp tongue and a cutting sense of humour, Adam can be extraordinarily naive. Brad wonders sometimes how Adam survived LA, with its manipulative poseurs and its negative vibes. He suspects that Adam bulldozed his way into people’s hearts with his sweet shy smile, and then just stayed there regardless of how they felt about it. It would be typical of Adam to do that, hell he did it with Brad didn’t he? That’s probably why Brad really wants to see Adam happy, because an unhappy Adam is not a concept that he can fathom without his heart skipping a beat. He knows that he isn’t the one to do it. He isn’t the forever kind of boy, at least not yet, and Adam is more romantic than a bosom heaving heroine from his Mama’s bodice rippers. It’s all about the gestures with Adam, big ones, little ones, ones of indeterminate size, and Brad knows, he just knows, that if he’d stuck with Adam, the gestures would only get larger, and more extravagant until the pressures of the expectations would have broken Brad, broken them, broken Adam, and that is just not acceptable.
So, he called it quits, and watched Adam’s face crumple, but Brad is smart and he knows that whatever Adam suffered then, it’s not as bad as what he would have gone through if Brad hadn’t pulled the plug, and he doesn’t use it as an excuse, but he uses it as some kind of consolation as he watches Adam walk away, his shoulders bowed, his spine curved, his head down, and those aren’t tears in Brad’s eyes, it’s just glitter or maybe dust.
It’s a death, but a clean one, and eventually everyone gives up their sackcloth and ashes, and it’s time for a good old fashioned wake. In LA, that means six martinis, a bowl of the good stuff, and a tearful reunion in the backroom of some club, with music throbbing through their veins and the strobes blinding their drink-dulled eyes. Adam doesn’t cry easily, and Brad is even worse, but the choice was between tears and make-up sex, and they both tacitly agreed the former was a better idea. They can talk again, and that’s more of a relief than Brad can allow himself to admit to. There are jokes only Adam gets, and sly references that only Adam can make and Brad missed them desperately when they were gone. Things are never normal between them, things never were, but things are good, and that’s the most Brad can expect. They’re both ready now to move on with their lives, investigate new pastures and try to find what each of them had always been looking for. Or at least that’s what Brad thinks. Brad realizes he’s wrong when he notices that Adam hasn’t gotten laid in three months.
This seems unfathomable to Brad, because it’s Adam, Adam who, when they met, smiled dreamy-slow and wicked-soft, eyes signalling immediate primal desire. Brad’s seen people react to Adam when they don’t even know that they’re doing it, seduced by his thrilling voice, his gentle hands, his hypnotic eyes, and when Adam reacts back it can be magical. So, if Adam isn’t having sex, then there’s something seriously wrong, and Brad knows beyond the shadow of a doubt that he has to fix it, that he’s the only one who can.
First rule to fixing Adam is to identify the root cause of the problem, and Brad thinks he knows the answer to this one. Once Adam’s gone monogamous, there’s no going back. No more one night stands, no more exciting flings, Adam is looking for something more stable, more permanent, more forever. If Brad can’t give him that, Brad can look for someone who can. He knows a lot of men, and some of them are even Adam’s type. He’s seen Adam look, even though he scrupulously never touched. He enlists Scarlett and Lee to help in the hunt. They know Adam almost as well as he does, they love him almost as much, and they want to see him happy too. Well, in Lee’s case, he mostly just wants to see Adam less sexually frustrated, but Brad knows how to work with what he can get. They put their heads together, and come up with what they all agree would be the perfect match, a man they all know and like, Cassidy Haley.
Adam may deny it vehemently, but everyone knows that he has a type, and that Brad was the epitome of it. He likes them intelligent and quirky and funny, he likes them small and slender and brunet. He likes them opinionated and flexible, adventurous and uninhibited. He’ll take Southern if he can get it, but he can do without. Cassidy lives up to most of the standards that Brad sets. Brad can admit without rancour that while he may be wittier than Cassidy (and he really thinks he is), he can’t begin to touch him for sheer creative talent. Cassidy is an artist and a musician, who grew up steeped in a culture that Brad is still trying to negotiate. The Bay Area and Texas are worlds apart, and Cassidy is San Fran in a beautiful body. He has less issues and hang-ups than anyone Brad’s ever known, and can only be good for Adam. Brad thinks he has a winner.
When he first subtly directs Cassidy towards Adam, he feels a twinge of jealousy, followed by a rush of vindication, as Cassidy laughs up at Adam, and Adam tilts his head, blue eyes glittering in the darkness and responds with a chuckle of his own. They get along swimmingly well, talking about fashion trends and music with the familiarity of true fanatics. Cassidy brings out his guitar, Adam sings some good old mellow tunes and the chemistry is palpable. As the evening comes to a close, Cassidy obviously offers, and with a slight flush of awkwardness, Adam agrees. Brad watches them leave together, walking close to each other, obviously deep in conversation, and hopes Cassidy realizes how fucking lucky he is.
It takes off from there. Adam is almost like a muse for Cassidy, who studies him intently, sketching for him, singing to him. They are so comfortable so quickly that even Brad is amazed. The fact that Adam seems content, if not rhapsodic, is driven home to him one evening when he drops by Adam’s place to find Cassidy ensconced in the chair that once belonged to him, as Adam gets dressed for a night on the town, both of them laughing about Adam’s increasingly outlandish choices. Brad is pleased, if a little regretful, but mostly pleased.
Cassidy and Adam don’t last as long as Brad thought they would. It’s just a month or two of whirlwind romance, almost like a vacation that they both seem to need. Brad doesn’t know Cassidy’s dating history, and quite frankly doesn’t really care, but it wouldn’t surprise him at all if he was recovering from a broken heart. The two of them really seem to enjoy their time together, they part as good friends, meet with bright smiles and lingering hugs. The sex, Adam tells him in confidence, was great, and Adam seems mostly healed from whatever was troubling him. But he still refuses to hook up, no longer seems to be the man he was before Brad ended their relationship, and so Brad can’t give up, can’t stop looking for someone to fill the place that he created and then left empty in Adam’s soul.
It takes some time before Brad zeroes in on the next possibility. His name is Drake, Drake Labry and he is so sweet that he makes Brad’s teeth hurt sometimes. Brad prefers his own men with more edge to them, and he knows Adam used to as well. But the times are different now, they are different and the soft spoken N’awlins boy would be good for Adam, Brad just knows it. Adam needs stability, more than he ever has before perhaps. American Idol is a big fucking deal, and while Adam plays it cool like he always does, Brad can tell that he’s nervous. Adam knows he can sing, he’d have to be insane not to know that, but Adam also knows that America would be intimidated by him, by the hair and the clothes and the make-up, the queer image and the queer lifestyle that is a part of who he is, sexual orientation and all. He’s getting ready to face rejection on the grand scale, and Brad, Danielle, Scarlett and all the rest can be there for him, but he needs more, so much more and maybe, just maybe, Brad thinks, Drake would be right for the rest.
Adam has known Drake for a while, so it takes him some time to catch on that in his quiet way Drake is offering more than just friendship. Brad is rather proud of the way he directed Drake towards Adam, actually. Unlike Cassidy, who knew exactly what he was doing, Drake has to be tutored, but once pushed, is perfect. Things come to a head one evening a few weeks into Idol, when Adam, exhausted and anguished, calls Brad, leaving a message so urgent, that Brad immediately calls back. When he hears what’s wrong, Brad realizes that once again it’s partially his fault that Adam sounds like that, lost and just a little undone.
Pictures have surfaced of the two of them together. Those were their golden days, when they were so wrapped up in each other that they could block out the world. Brad knows, he has always known, that honeymoons don’t last forever, and nothing gold can stay, but he never realized that the fallout would be so devastating for Adam. But Adam, brave Adam, manages somehow to hold steadfast, consoling Brad, insisting that he’ll either go through honest or go out honest, but he will not compromise. Brad can’t give him what he needs, he just can’t, but maybe Drake can, so the next call is to Drake, and the cues are given. Drake picks up on them like a pro and when a few weeks later, Brad sees Drake in the American Idol audience, sitting with Adam’s family, and applauding him like a trouper, Brad knows that he got it right this time.
Adam still calls him all the time though, just to talk, and it’s a relief to know that their friendship hasn’t been diluted by the new budding relationship or the pressures of American Idol. That’s how he knows that Adam is taking it slow this time with Drake, not making any promises and not expecting any in return. That’s also how he knows all about Kris Allen. Brad sees it as the ultimate irony that Adam’s straight, married roommate is physically Adam’s type on a stick. If it hadn’t been for Drake, Brad might have been a little nervous about it, because Adam does not need to be falling for straight boys at this point, no matter how sweet. But Drake is in the picture, and while clearly Adam and Kris have become fast friends, the kind of friends you can only be in times of war, plague or reality TV competitions, there doesn’t seem to be a threat, not one that Brad can see anyway.
This is why nothing that Adam says in his Rolling Stones interview comes as a surprise to Brad, though the way the media picks up on his crush on Kris is both hilarious and mildly insulting. But Brad does get a lump in his throat when Adam says in interview after interview that he has only been in love once. Maybe it’s a little selfish, but it’s a hell of a thing to be loved like that, and he doesn’t really want to be forgotten just yet.
When the tour starts, Adam’s so madly busy that their calls slowly drop off, but Brad keeps himself updated via twitter and the internet. He finds ontd_ai in particular most informative about the minutiae of Adam’s life. He also finds them very funny, which is just an added bonus. That’s how he knows about the concerts that Drake attends, the messages that Adam exchanges with his present boyfriend. Through second hand information he tracks the relationship that he initiated, and watches it deepen, feeling rather proud of his choice when he sees them holding hands in public. Of course the fan forums also track Kris Allen assiduously, and again Brad feels a twinge of concern when he sees the looks Kris and Adam exchange, one watching with awed fascination, the other with warm affection, but the warning bells are tamped down every time he sees pictures of Kris’s pretty wife, or pictures of Adam with Drake. Soon the tour is over and Brad manages to put those thoughts entirely out of his mind.
Adam is back in LA now, and so is Drake and Brad sees something of them now, though not very much, since Adam’s busy recording for his album. But every single time they meet, Brad is hardpressed not to interrogate him on the progress of the relationship. It appears to be doing rather well, but Adam and Drake are both being very closemouthed about it, and Brad’s attempts at pushing for more information have been singularly unsuccessful. Neil tells him under a vow of secrecy that he feels Drake can’t handle the pressures, the odd hours, the constant media attention, the examination of every action, but so far Drake seems to be coping with a fair amount of grace, and Brad lets himself hope.
It isn’t till nearly six months later after the album is out and has already gone platinum and Adam’s tour is imminent, that Brad has to admit that Neil (as he so often is, the little prick) was right. Adam doesn’t even tell him himself. Alisan calls him to say that Drake’s left, gone back to Louisiana, overwhelmed by the last six months and the way they’ve affected his life. Brad tries to call Adam, but the phone goes to voicemail, and Brad remembers the stories that Alisan told him about how Adam had been after their relationship had ended. He goes over immediately to Adam’s house, his beautiful new house that Drake had helped him decorate, but when he gets there he realizes his presence is superfluous.
The tableau that greets him is the one he has hoped can be avoided. Kris is seated on the couch, and Adam is on the floor, his head resting on Kris’s knee. Kris gently runs his hand through Adam’s hair, and Adam’s eyes are closed, tear tracks still visible on his face. The look on Kris’s face is not one that is usually demonstrated by friends, it’s heartbreakingly tender, even vulnerable, and when he raises his head to look at Brad, there’s an expression in his eyes that Cassidy didn’t have and Drake didn’t have. It’s an expression Brad knows well, he saw it in the mirror for more than a year, and if there’s one thing that he can be sure off, it’s that Kris Allen is a better man than he will ever be. Brad leaves quietly, there’s nothing else he can do.
Despite all his good intentions to not interfere in Adam’s life again, Brad just can’t resist calling Kris who agrees to a meeting immediately. Brad’s tactics have to be different this time, because Kris is a different kettle of fish altogether. So, for a change, he goes with total honesty. Lays all the cards on the table, and tells Kris to either man up or get out. Kris mans up. He doesn’t make a single move on Adam for a year, lets Adam get his head together, stands solidly by his side for the entire time. After that he gets the most amicable divorce in the world from his beautiful wife, who understands that there is no room for three people in one relationship, and he lets Adam return the favour of support and succour. Then with Brad’s blessing he goes ahead and makes his move, and for the first time in three years or more, Brad sees the look that he’s been missing so fucking much return to Adam’s face, the look of a man who’s just caught his first glimpse of Paradise. Brad hopes that this time it’s there for keeps. He wishes that he could have kept that look on Adam’s face forever, but he likes the thought that he played a role, no matter how small, in putting it there. Adam will always be one of his dearest friends, and seeing Adam happy, which Kris clearly makes him, lets Brad go on with his life without any guilt. He may have some regrets, but Cheeks usually deals with those, he loves LA and LA loves him, the sex is great, the scenes are great and Adam will be ok. Brad is ready to move on.
Sometimes Brad wonders if Adam still thinks of him, thinks of them at all. That question is quickly answered. The first interview Adam gives after he and Kris declare their relationship, he tells Time Magazine that he has only been in love twice in his life. Brad knows then that he will never be forgotten.