Behind the Mask V
Title: Behind the Mask V
Fandom: AI8 RPS
Pairing: Kris/Adam
Rating: PG-15
Summary: Sequel to Behind the Mask IV. Adam is an incredible performer, he knows that, so why is he nervous?
Nerves were for people who didn’t know they were awesome. Adam knew he was talented, he knew he could sing, but when he was stood backstage watching the support act finish up, he felt his stomach twisting and rolling the likes of which it hadn’t done for a long time.
Word Count: 3612
A/N: Part 5 of this epic ‘verse! Enjoy, feedback is love <3
When life consisted of dressing up in fabulous, glittery clothes and make up, pretending to be someone on stage every day, the little things became incredibly important to Adam, those things that reminded him that there was a normal life out there somewhere and that he could get snatches of it if he tried hard enough and kept the right people around.
It was moments like the one where he found that Brad had drank the last of his juice - from the carton - and then put it back in the fridge, sat on the counter and waited for Adam to try and pour himself a glass. It hadn’t been all that funny, but Brad had laughed for a good five minutes because even rock stars ran out of Tropicana. It was the way that Danielle looked at him when he was fussing over album sales and reminded him how lucky he was; that only a few years ago, Adam had been living in a damp apartment that wasn’t even the size of his current bathroom, scraping by a living. And more recently, it was the way that Kris spoke to him on the phone, like he was just a normal person who didn’t get panties and bras flung at his face when he was on stage, like he didn’t get people flinging themselves at him for fifteen minutes of fame or for a story they could tell their grandchildren.
His phone calls with Kris had been snatched and short mostly, where Adam told Kris about some guy he’d met whose album sales had flopped and as such he’d had to move out of his apartment into a smaller one. He didn’t know why he was telling Kris that; it was inane, and Kris clearly agreed because Adam could hear him rolling his eyes as he talked about the homeless man that lived outside the coffee shop where he worked and how Kris made sure to give him water during the day and sneak a couple of cups of coffee and pastries out to him whenever he could. They came out of his paycheck at the end of the month but it was worth it. Adam hadn’t even noticed the man, he admitted as such and promised that he’d keep an eye out for him in the future.
Not that he’d had much of a chance to swing by the coffee house recently because he’d been so busy with his album and press releases where he very carefully fielded any questions pertaining to those pictures of the kiss. After about a week of nothing being said, people stopped asking. Adam was glad about it, but the odd picture of Kris cropped up on the internet.
The thing that was keeping him going, though, were the phone conversations with Kris. They spoke for anything between five minutes and two hours (though it if was going to be that long, Adam always called Kris back because he wasn’t a starving artist), and they talked about everything and nothing. He told Kris about how he used to be a chubby ginger teenager with a skin problem and no friends, and Kris made all the right sounds, appropriately surprised and reassuring that Adam now looked ‘fierce’. Their conversations focused mainly on Adam, Kris learning things he never knew about the other man and in turn, eventually, Adam stopped talking long enough to ask Kris questions about himself.
Adam learned that Kris was an amazing human being. He learned that he’d had a rib removed when he was younger due to an accident on his bike, he learned that Kris nearly died when he was on a missionary trip but that he wasn’t strictly religious. He learned that Kris was going to get married to his high school sweetheart but when they’d taken a break and Kris had made out with Drew at college and pictures got leaked to Katy, she’d freaked out and said that she couldn’t be with someone who liked guys too. He learned that Kris worked two jobs and didn’t get to play as much as he’d like to, but he was okay with that because he could make the rent and he learned that Kris was absolutely not star struck by him.
It was refreshing. Someone he had only met a little while ago by chance treated him the same way that his old friends did. Kris told him if what he was saying was bullshit. Kris made him laugh. The Universe had done the right thing in trying to put them together, it was Adam that had screwed it up.
“I think you should come to my concert,” Adam said in the middle of one of their conversations. Kris had laughed.
“You think so?” he asked, “Wouldn’t that change everything?”
“I don’t know, would you get weird when you see how fierce and hot I am when I’m performing? I might blow your mind.” Kris laughed again on the other end of the phone and Adam felt validated (how lame was he?). “Then things might get a little awkward, yeah, you’re right, maybe you shouldn’t come.”
“I never said that,” Kris retorted, “I’ve only seen youtube videos and there’s so much screaming and panty throwing that I can’t make out this fierce, glittery alien that’s supposed to be on stage.”
Adam groaned. “You’ve been googling me again, haven’t you.” He didn’t mind, not really, because that meant that he was on Kris’ mind. However some of the stuff that was out there was... horrendous, to say the least.
Kris chuckled, “Maybe. I found your brother’s blog, it’s hillarious. I think I like him better than you.”
Adam made a hurt sound, though he was smiling. “He’ll be pleased to hear that. He’s always complaining about being the other Lambert boy. He’s just bitter because he’s untalented.”
“I wouldn’t say that, he’s a great writer,” Kris said sincerely. “But we’ve gotten side tracked and my break’s nearly over. I gotta go back.”
“Will you come to my show?” Adam asked, a question this time rather than a thought. He hated how vulnerable Kris made him feel, like if he said ‘no’ then something inside Adam would break a little bit. “I’ll get you tickets, you can have a plus one if you’d like...?”
In all their conversations, Kris hadn’t actually mentioned if he was single or not. Adam guessed he was, but this would settle it.
“Nah, just a ticket for me. I’ll be surrounded by enough people that I won’t feel lonely.”
Adam released the breath he hadn’t even realised he was holding. “Sure,” he said finally. “You better get back to work. It starts at 8.30, but get there early. Your ticket’ll be waiting in the box office for you.”
He thought he could hear Kris’ smile, quirky and lopsided through the phone. They more they’d talked, the more Adam was convinced that Kris was the missing piece of his puzzle.
“Okay.”
The silence wasn’t awkward, it never was. A lot of their conversations revolved around mutual periods of silence when neither one was talking but so much was being said. Kris’ silence told Adam I accept you, you’re a freak but I don’t mind. and sometimes You’re a normal guy, and you’re an ass. Adam’s silences told Kris I appreciate you. I like you. You’re good for me. but he figured that the message probably got lost in translation somewhere along the line.
“I really have to go, Adam,” Kris said and Adam nodded before giving a verbal cue; it wasn’t quite a groan, but close enough. At least Kris sounded apolgetic and reluctant. “I get off work at four...?”
“Sound checks,” Adam answered just as sadly. “But it’s cool. Go and make people coffee. I should be rehearsing now anyway.”
“I can’t imagine you need to rehearse that much,” Kris said and Adam felt warmed by Kris’ faith in his ability to perform, even if he’d never really seen him do it.
“You’re biased,” Adam settled on saying instead of the plethora of other things he could say. “See you at the concert.”
“Yeah,” Kris laughed again, “I’ll be the one not screaming. I- Hang on, I’m just coming!- gotta go. Talk to you later, good luck with the show tonight.”
And Adam was left listening to the dialling tone.
*
Adam didn’t get nervous. He stopped getting nervous after the first show on his tours, or the first night in a run. He knew the steps and the words and people loved it when he fucked up because it proved that he was human and therefore that he made mistakes. He enjoyed fucking up because it meant that he was allowed to improvise and the band wouldn’t kill him for it.
Nerves were for people who didn’t know they were awesome. Adam knew he was talented, he knew he could sing, but when he was stood backstage watching the support act finish up, he felt his stomach twisting and rolling the likes of which it hadn’t done for a long time. He felt nervous, terrified, even, that he was going to fuck up. All because Kris was in the audience. It was stupid, to feel so strongly about the guy that he’d only just met reall,y that he’d been getting to know and it was a breath of fresh air, but he didn’t want the facade to end. It was kind of fairy-tale esque (which fitted wonderfully considering how they’d first met), and they hadn’t had their second act twist or anything yet. It was all just a little too good to be true.
“Pull your shit together,” Tommy said, nudging Adam’s shoulder with his as he passed the other man to tumultuous applause and screaming. Somewhere in the front row was a huge glittery banner that announced they were members of Team Adommy. It amused the shit out of Tommy that people thought of him and Adam like that. He loved Tommy, sure, but the guy was as straight as an arrow, even if he was overly comfortable with guys in his personal space. He could make up to the camera with the best of them. And he was good at making up to the fans.
Adam came out last, accompanied by a blast of pyrotechnics, sweeping music and he strutted out onto the stage like he owned it. It was the very best kind of high, even if it was tempered a little today with nerves knowing that Kris was watching him. He wondered if Kris could see, the guy wasn’t huge and there were a lot of women in heels out there.
“Hey guys, thanks for coming out,” he wet his lower lip, eyes looking like they were trying to scan the crowd but through all the lights it was damn near impossible to see anything. Adam was kind of glad of that, today. He didn’t want to see Kris. He might fuck up. Kris made his knees feel like jello. Something he hadn’t felt since Brad. “You all know this one, feel free to join in!”
It was easy, too easy to get lost in the music, the sensual way the beat flowed through him and the words fell out of his mouth and off his lips. He was born to do this, born to be this. The glitter and the fame and the music were the things that Adam lived for. It was a powerful drug, performing, and he wasn’t often in full control of what he was doing when he was up on stage. It was why he’d made out with Tommy so many times, he got swept up in the music and Tommy was kind of cute and there and he didn’t mind.
The first time they’d met, actually, Tommy had just grinned at Adam and told him to “use me as you see fit” and Adam had done. Many times on stage. Never in private, because there were lines you didn’t cross, and besides, straight, but the Adommy fans loved it, and Adam and Tommy loved their fans.
His set-list was one he knew in his sleep. He could do it without trying, without thinking but that wasn’t always a good thing. His mind wandered halfway through Strut and he fucked up the lyrics, laughing to himself as he corrected them and shrugging apologetically to the audience. “That’s what’ll happen when you’ve got a guy on the brain,” he said with a salacious wink in the direction of the audience, in the direction of Kris. Not that he could see Kris, he didn’t even know that Kris was actually in the audience, but it had the desired effect and there was screaming and cheering and everyone forgot quickly enough that he’d messed up the lyrics.
He finished with For Your Entertainment, a big finish that allowed him to riff and just lose himself in the music, forgetting that there was anyone else out there, singing like he would die if he didn’t. Sometimes he felt like that. But as soon as the song was over and the music had stopped ringing in his ears, and he thanked the fans over their screams, he had to get back stage. He had to get off the stage and into his dressing room because there had been a backstage pass in with the tickets and Kris had to use it.
He wanted Kris to use it. His skin felt itchy, like it didn’t fit him properly because he was nervous again. The high of performing had drained out of him instantly and now he just felt like maybe he was a little too glam for Kris right now, maybe he should take off his make up? But Kris had never seen him without it on and that was something Adam hated; himself without make up. He wasn’t Adam Lambert without it on, no one knew that side of him that wasn’t born with glitter on his face. That Adam was insecure and he didn’t want Kris to see that part of him. No one except Brad loved that part of him.
At the root of it all, Adam was still that fat ginger kid that wanted to be loved and accepted by everyone. Now he just wore make up and dyed his hair in an attempt to make himself cooler, hotter, whatever he felt that he needed to be.
He jumped when there was a knock on his door and it was pushed open. Kris stumbled in looking a little dishevelled and Adam could have sworn that was LP’s hand on the doorknob shutting it behind the little man from Arkansas.
“So,” Adam started, fiddling with one of his necklaces absently. It was a nervous habit, something he barely realised that he did but when he spotted his hands moving restlessly he still them, settling for getting to his feet and moving closer to Kris instead. Everyone always joked about Adam’s gravitational field, but no one ever talked about the one that Kris had, or maybe it was just Adam-specific since people tended not to orbit Kris like they did Adam.
“So,” Kris mimicked infuriatingly. His lips twitched and Adam wrinkled his nose. “You’re not half bad.”
Adam’s surprised laugh made them both jump a little and he reached out, putting his hand on Kris’ shoulder. “Coming from you, that’s practically a glowing review,” he said with a grin as Kris moved closer, into the touch. He looked down. The toes of their shoes were touching though they couldn’t be more different; Kris’ beat up sneakers looked old and worn and childish next to Adam’s shiny, fierce, snake skin boots.
“You know,” Kris muttered, lifting his head from where he’d been looking down at their shoes and maybe considering the contrast too, “if you run away again, I’m going to hunt you down and kill you.”
Adam wondered if his face was about to split in two, he was smiling so hard. He probably looked like an idiot. He didn’t care.
“I didn’t have any plans on running away. I do have to go and meet some fans, but I can always take you with me, or make you wait in here until I get back?”
Kris looked distinctly unhappy at the prospect of being left alone so Adam continued, “It’s not for another half hour...?”
It seemed to sate Kris because suddenly there was a hand in his hair, curled in the strands and lips against his. Kris’ lips were slightly chapped - Adam wondered if he could sell him on the wonders of lipbalm - but whatever else he might have thought got lost because there were teeth sinking into his lower lip and he took a couple of steps forwards until Kris’ thighs hit the vanity.
A muffled groan came from the fully body contact that move created and Adam’s hands slid down to Kris’ hips, half lifting, half shoving him onto the top of the dresser so that they were at a slightly more even level. His hands cupped Kris’ face and he wondered just how it was that Kris fitted so perfectly against him. Kris’ legs wound around his thighs, pulling him closer and they did just fit like this was what they were supposed to do, supposed to be. It felt as natural to Adam as singing.
Kris’ hands had slid down to his waist, underneath the hem of his shirt and calloused fingertips brushed over the skin on his sides. He shivered and pushed closer, hips knocking into Kris’ and the younger man moaned against Adam’s lips. He licked his way into Kris’ mouth, feeling like a starving man just shoved in front of an all-you-can-eat buffet. He couldn’t get enough of Kris and he broke the kiss to slide his mouth along Kris’ jaw, biting and sucking and tasting, delighting in the shivers that rippled through Kris with each movement, each teasing taste and touch, the promise of more to come.
“You’re definitely not boring,” Adam breathed against Kris’ racing pulse, biting down gently and Kris’ head tipped back for him, exposing the skin. He groaned and Adam could imagine the puzzled frown tugging on Kris’ face, fighting with the blissed out expression for dominance. “I mean, a boring person wouldn’t be here.”
His hand slid down Kris’ chest, resting just above the waistband of his pants. Kris’ hips rocked up into the barely there touch and Adam’s breath caught. He was about to do something that would make them both feel a whole lot better when there was a demanding knock at the door.
“Adam! Come on, you’ve got a press thing! Meet and greet, remember!”
“Fuck,” Adam hissed against Kris’ neck and Kris just blinked at him a couple of times, lips kiss-swollen and pupils huge. He looked fucked out and gorgeous and barely anything had happened, but Adam wanted it to, fuck, Adam wanted it to so badly. He was tempted to just ignore the knocking but then it happened again like the best kind of contraceptive, or cock-blocker. “I gotta go.”
“Hunting down and killing,” Kris said, voice a little rougher than Adam had ever heard before and fuck if he didn’t want that right now. He wanted to hear how rough and raw he could make Kris sound. Adam chuckled.
“I know, baby,” he shook his head. Sandy knocked on the door again. Adam thought that if she knocked any harder, she’d bleed against the door and that wouldn’t be good; she’d never let him live it down and he’d have to do nice things for her for the rest of all time.
Kris pulled him into another kiss, rough and dirty and everything that he needed it to be. Adam wondered if it was stupid that he felt he could probably come like this, fully clothed with a sort of wholesome Southern boy. But then Kris sucked on his lower lip and Adam thought, no, not so stupid after all.
“Adam! Get your ass out here or I’m coming in there and you don’t want that!” Sandy barked and she smacked her hand on the door again. Adam could kill her for ruining this.
“I’m not running, I’m being dragged. Now we’re even,” he muttered against Kris’ mouth, taking a couple of steps backwards. “I’m coming,” he called, trying to put himself back together again because he was sure that he probably looked completely indecent. He reached the door and looked back at Kris which proved to be his undoing. He strode back over in three long paces and kissed Kris again like his life depended on it. Like he needed to prove that there was something actually there and that Kris wasn’t just some random groupie along for the ride.
“Go,” Kris laughed against Adam’s lips, cupping his face like Adam was made of china. No one touched him like that. “Otherwise she’ll come in here and we don’t want that.”
Adam smiled and nudged Kris’ nose with his own. “I won’t be long.” he promised, and he wouldn’t be. He loved his fans, he did, but he wanted to see what Kris looked like when he was orgasming more.
“I’ll be here,” Kris said quietly, shifting off the vanity and into the chair.
As Adam opened the door, he saw Kris getting comfortable and he let himself believe Kris’ words.
Onto Part 6!
Fandom: AI8 RPS
Pairing: Kris/Adam
Rating: PG-15
Summary: Sequel to Behind the Mask IV. Adam is an incredible performer, he knows that, so why is he nervous?
Nerves were for people who didn’t know they were awesome. Adam knew he was talented, he knew he could sing, but when he was stood backstage watching the support act finish up, he felt his stomach twisting and rolling the likes of which it hadn’t done for a long time.
Word Count: 3612
A/N: Part 5 of this epic ‘verse! Enjoy, feedback is love <3
When life consisted of dressing up in fabulous, glittery clothes and make up, pretending to be someone on stage every day, the little things became incredibly important to Adam, those things that reminded him that there was a normal life out there somewhere and that he could get snatches of it if he tried hard enough and kept the right people around.
It was moments like the one where he found that Brad had drank the last of his juice - from the carton - and then put it back in the fridge, sat on the counter and waited for Adam to try and pour himself a glass. It hadn’t been all that funny, but Brad had laughed for a good five minutes because even rock stars ran out of Tropicana. It was the way that Danielle looked at him when he was fussing over album sales and reminded him how lucky he was; that only a few years ago, Adam had been living in a damp apartment that wasn’t even the size of his current bathroom, scraping by a living. And more recently, it was the way that Kris spoke to him on the phone, like he was just a normal person who didn’t get panties and bras flung at his face when he was on stage, like he didn’t get people flinging themselves at him for fifteen minutes of fame or for a story they could tell their grandchildren.
His phone calls with Kris had been snatched and short mostly, where Adam told Kris about some guy he’d met whose album sales had flopped and as such he’d had to move out of his apartment into a smaller one. He didn’t know why he was telling Kris that; it was inane, and Kris clearly agreed because Adam could hear him rolling his eyes as he talked about the homeless man that lived outside the coffee shop where he worked and how Kris made sure to give him water during the day and sneak a couple of cups of coffee and pastries out to him whenever he could. They came out of his paycheck at the end of the month but it was worth it. Adam hadn’t even noticed the man, he admitted as such and promised that he’d keep an eye out for him in the future.
Not that he’d had much of a chance to swing by the coffee house recently because he’d been so busy with his album and press releases where he very carefully fielded any questions pertaining to those pictures of the kiss. After about a week of nothing being said, people stopped asking. Adam was glad about it, but the odd picture of Kris cropped up on the internet.
The thing that was keeping him going, though, were the phone conversations with Kris. They spoke for anything between five minutes and two hours (though it if was going to be that long, Adam always called Kris back because he wasn’t a starving artist), and they talked about everything and nothing. He told Kris about how he used to be a chubby ginger teenager with a skin problem and no friends, and Kris made all the right sounds, appropriately surprised and reassuring that Adam now looked ‘fierce’. Their conversations focused mainly on Adam, Kris learning things he never knew about the other man and in turn, eventually, Adam stopped talking long enough to ask Kris questions about himself.
Adam learned that Kris was an amazing human being. He learned that he’d had a rib removed when he was younger due to an accident on his bike, he learned that Kris nearly died when he was on a missionary trip but that he wasn’t strictly religious. He learned that Kris was going to get married to his high school sweetheart but when they’d taken a break and Kris had made out with Drew at college and pictures got leaked to Katy, she’d freaked out and said that she couldn’t be with someone who liked guys too. He learned that Kris worked two jobs and didn’t get to play as much as he’d like to, but he was okay with that because he could make the rent and he learned that Kris was absolutely not star struck by him.
It was refreshing. Someone he had only met a little while ago by chance treated him the same way that his old friends did. Kris told him if what he was saying was bullshit. Kris made him laugh. The Universe had done the right thing in trying to put them together, it was Adam that had screwed it up.
“I think you should come to my concert,” Adam said in the middle of one of their conversations. Kris had laughed.
“You think so?” he asked, “Wouldn’t that change everything?”
“I don’t know, would you get weird when you see how fierce and hot I am when I’m performing? I might blow your mind.” Kris laughed again on the other end of the phone and Adam felt validated (how lame was he?). “Then things might get a little awkward, yeah, you’re right, maybe you shouldn’t come.”
“I never said that,” Kris retorted, “I’ve only seen youtube videos and there’s so much screaming and panty throwing that I can’t make out this fierce, glittery alien that’s supposed to be on stage.”
Adam groaned. “You’ve been googling me again, haven’t you.” He didn’t mind, not really, because that meant that he was on Kris’ mind. However some of the stuff that was out there was... horrendous, to say the least.
Kris chuckled, “Maybe. I found your brother’s blog, it’s hillarious. I think I like him better than you.”
Adam made a hurt sound, though he was smiling. “He’ll be pleased to hear that. He’s always complaining about being the other Lambert boy. He’s just bitter because he’s untalented.”
“I wouldn’t say that, he’s a great writer,” Kris said sincerely. “But we’ve gotten side tracked and my break’s nearly over. I gotta go back.”
“Will you come to my show?” Adam asked, a question this time rather than a thought. He hated how vulnerable Kris made him feel, like if he said ‘no’ then something inside Adam would break a little bit. “I’ll get you tickets, you can have a plus one if you’d like...?”
In all their conversations, Kris hadn’t actually mentioned if he was single or not. Adam guessed he was, but this would settle it.
“Nah, just a ticket for me. I’ll be surrounded by enough people that I won’t feel lonely.”
Adam released the breath he hadn’t even realised he was holding. “Sure,” he said finally. “You better get back to work. It starts at 8.30, but get there early. Your ticket’ll be waiting in the box office for you.”
He thought he could hear Kris’ smile, quirky and lopsided through the phone. They more they’d talked, the more Adam was convinced that Kris was the missing piece of his puzzle.
“Okay.”
The silence wasn’t awkward, it never was. A lot of their conversations revolved around mutual periods of silence when neither one was talking but so much was being said. Kris’ silence told Adam I accept you, you’re a freak but I don’t mind. and sometimes You’re a normal guy, and you’re an ass. Adam’s silences told Kris I appreciate you. I like you. You’re good for me. but he figured that the message probably got lost in translation somewhere along the line.
“I really have to go, Adam,” Kris said and Adam nodded before giving a verbal cue; it wasn’t quite a groan, but close enough. At least Kris sounded apolgetic and reluctant. “I get off work at four...?”
“Sound checks,” Adam answered just as sadly. “But it’s cool. Go and make people coffee. I should be rehearsing now anyway.”
“I can’t imagine you need to rehearse that much,” Kris said and Adam felt warmed by Kris’ faith in his ability to perform, even if he’d never really seen him do it.
“You’re biased,” Adam settled on saying instead of the plethora of other things he could say. “See you at the concert.”
“Yeah,” Kris laughed again, “I’ll be the one not screaming. I- Hang on, I’m just coming!- gotta go. Talk to you later, good luck with the show tonight.”
And Adam was left listening to the dialling tone.
*
Adam didn’t get nervous. He stopped getting nervous after the first show on his tours, or the first night in a run. He knew the steps and the words and people loved it when he fucked up because it proved that he was human and therefore that he made mistakes. He enjoyed fucking up because it meant that he was allowed to improvise and the band wouldn’t kill him for it.
Nerves were for people who didn’t know they were awesome. Adam knew he was talented, he knew he could sing, but when he was stood backstage watching the support act finish up, he felt his stomach twisting and rolling the likes of which it hadn’t done for a long time. He felt nervous, terrified, even, that he was going to fuck up. All because Kris was in the audience. It was stupid, to feel so strongly about the guy that he’d only just met reall,y that he’d been getting to know and it was a breath of fresh air, but he didn’t want the facade to end. It was kind of fairy-tale esque (which fitted wonderfully considering how they’d first met), and they hadn’t had their second act twist or anything yet. It was all just a little too good to be true.
“Pull your shit together,” Tommy said, nudging Adam’s shoulder with his as he passed the other man to tumultuous applause and screaming. Somewhere in the front row was a huge glittery banner that announced they were members of Team Adommy. It amused the shit out of Tommy that people thought of him and Adam like that. He loved Tommy, sure, but the guy was as straight as an arrow, even if he was overly comfortable with guys in his personal space. He could make up to the camera with the best of them. And he was good at making up to the fans.
Adam came out last, accompanied by a blast of pyrotechnics, sweeping music and he strutted out onto the stage like he owned it. It was the very best kind of high, even if it was tempered a little today with nerves knowing that Kris was watching him. He wondered if Kris could see, the guy wasn’t huge and there were a lot of women in heels out there.
“Hey guys, thanks for coming out,” he wet his lower lip, eyes looking like they were trying to scan the crowd but through all the lights it was damn near impossible to see anything. Adam was kind of glad of that, today. He didn’t want to see Kris. He might fuck up. Kris made his knees feel like jello. Something he hadn’t felt since Brad. “You all know this one, feel free to join in!”
It was easy, too easy to get lost in the music, the sensual way the beat flowed through him and the words fell out of his mouth and off his lips. He was born to do this, born to be this. The glitter and the fame and the music were the things that Adam lived for. It was a powerful drug, performing, and he wasn’t often in full control of what he was doing when he was up on stage. It was why he’d made out with Tommy so many times, he got swept up in the music and Tommy was kind of cute and there and he didn’t mind.
The first time they’d met, actually, Tommy had just grinned at Adam and told him to “use me as you see fit” and Adam had done. Many times on stage. Never in private, because there were lines you didn’t cross, and besides, straight, but the Adommy fans loved it, and Adam and Tommy loved their fans.
His set-list was one he knew in his sleep. He could do it without trying, without thinking but that wasn’t always a good thing. His mind wandered halfway through Strut and he fucked up the lyrics, laughing to himself as he corrected them and shrugging apologetically to the audience. “That’s what’ll happen when you’ve got a guy on the brain,” he said with a salacious wink in the direction of the audience, in the direction of Kris. Not that he could see Kris, he didn’t even know that Kris was actually in the audience, but it had the desired effect and there was screaming and cheering and everyone forgot quickly enough that he’d messed up the lyrics.
He finished with For Your Entertainment, a big finish that allowed him to riff and just lose himself in the music, forgetting that there was anyone else out there, singing like he would die if he didn’t. Sometimes he felt like that. But as soon as the song was over and the music had stopped ringing in his ears, and he thanked the fans over their screams, he had to get back stage. He had to get off the stage and into his dressing room because there had been a backstage pass in with the tickets and Kris had to use it.
He wanted Kris to use it. His skin felt itchy, like it didn’t fit him properly because he was nervous again. The high of performing had drained out of him instantly and now he just felt like maybe he was a little too glam for Kris right now, maybe he should take off his make up? But Kris had never seen him without it on and that was something Adam hated; himself without make up. He wasn’t Adam Lambert without it on, no one knew that side of him that wasn’t born with glitter on his face. That Adam was insecure and he didn’t want Kris to see that part of him. No one except Brad loved that part of him.
At the root of it all, Adam was still that fat ginger kid that wanted to be loved and accepted by everyone. Now he just wore make up and dyed his hair in an attempt to make himself cooler, hotter, whatever he felt that he needed to be.
He jumped when there was a knock on his door and it was pushed open. Kris stumbled in looking a little dishevelled and Adam could have sworn that was LP’s hand on the doorknob shutting it behind the little man from Arkansas.
“So,” Adam started, fiddling with one of his necklaces absently. It was a nervous habit, something he barely realised that he did but when he spotted his hands moving restlessly he still them, settling for getting to his feet and moving closer to Kris instead. Everyone always joked about Adam’s gravitational field, but no one ever talked about the one that Kris had, or maybe it was just Adam-specific since people tended not to orbit Kris like they did Adam.
“So,” Kris mimicked infuriatingly. His lips twitched and Adam wrinkled his nose. “You’re not half bad.”
Adam’s surprised laugh made them both jump a little and he reached out, putting his hand on Kris’ shoulder. “Coming from you, that’s practically a glowing review,” he said with a grin as Kris moved closer, into the touch. He looked down. The toes of their shoes were touching though they couldn’t be more different; Kris’ beat up sneakers looked old and worn and childish next to Adam’s shiny, fierce, snake skin boots.
“You know,” Kris muttered, lifting his head from where he’d been looking down at their shoes and maybe considering the contrast too, “if you run away again, I’m going to hunt you down and kill you.”
Adam wondered if his face was about to split in two, he was smiling so hard. He probably looked like an idiot. He didn’t care.
“I didn’t have any plans on running away. I do have to go and meet some fans, but I can always take you with me, or make you wait in here until I get back?”
Kris looked distinctly unhappy at the prospect of being left alone so Adam continued, “It’s not for another half hour...?”
It seemed to sate Kris because suddenly there was a hand in his hair, curled in the strands and lips against his. Kris’ lips were slightly chapped - Adam wondered if he could sell him on the wonders of lipbalm - but whatever else he might have thought got lost because there were teeth sinking into his lower lip and he took a couple of steps forwards until Kris’ thighs hit the vanity.
A muffled groan came from the fully body contact that move created and Adam’s hands slid down to Kris’ hips, half lifting, half shoving him onto the top of the dresser so that they were at a slightly more even level. His hands cupped Kris’ face and he wondered just how it was that Kris fitted so perfectly against him. Kris’ legs wound around his thighs, pulling him closer and they did just fit like this was what they were supposed to do, supposed to be. It felt as natural to Adam as singing.
Kris’ hands had slid down to his waist, underneath the hem of his shirt and calloused fingertips brushed over the skin on his sides. He shivered and pushed closer, hips knocking into Kris’ and the younger man moaned against Adam’s lips. He licked his way into Kris’ mouth, feeling like a starving man just shoved in front of an all-you-can-eat buffet. He couldn’t get enough of Kris and he broke the kiss to slide his mouth along Kris’ jaw, biting and sucking and tasting, delighting in the shivers that rippled through Kris with each movement, each teasing taste and touch, the promise of more to come.
“You’re definitely not boring,” Adam breathed against Kris’ racing pulse, biting down gently and Kris’ head tipped back for him, exposing the skin. He groaned and Adam could imagine the puzzled frown tugging on Kris’ face, fighting with the blissed out expression for dominance. “I mean, a boring person wouldn’t be here.”
His hand slid down Kris’ chest, resting just above the waistband of his pants. Kris’ hips rocked up into the barely there touch and Adam’s breath caught. He was about to do something that would make them both feel a whole lot better when there was a demanding knock at the door.
“Adam! Come on, you’ve got a press thing! Meet and greet, remember!”
“Fuck,” Adam hissed against Kris’ neck and Kris just blinked at him a couple of times, lips kiss-swollen and pupils huge. He looked fucked out and gorgeous and barely anything had happened, but Adam wanted it to, fuck, Adam wanted it to so badly. He was tempted to just ignore the knocking but then it happened again like the best kind of contraceptive, or cock-blocker. “I gotta go.”
“Hunting down and killing,” Kris said, voice a little rougher than Adam had ever heard before and fuck if he didn’t want that right now. He wanted to hear how rough and raw he could make Kris sound. Adam chuckled.
“I know, baby,” he shook his head. Sandy knocked on the door again. Adam thought that if she knocked any harder, she’d bleed against the door and that wouldn’t be good; she’d never let him live it down and he’d have to do nice things for her for the rest of all time.
Kris pulled him into another kiss, rough and dirty and everything that he needed it to be. Adam wondered if it was stupid that he felt he could probably come like this, fully clothed with a sort of wholesome Southern boy. But then Kris sucked on his lower lip and Adam thought, no, not so stupid after all.
“Adam! Get your ass out here or I’m coming in there and you don’t want that!” Sandy barked and she smacked her hand on the door again. Adam could kill her for ruining this.
“I’m not running, I’m being dragged. Now we’re even,” he muttered against Kris’ mouth, taking a couple of steps backwards. “I’m coming,” he called, trying to put himself back together again because he was sure that he probably looked completely indecent. He reached the door and looked back at Kris which proved to be his undoing. He strode back over in three long paces and kissed Kris again like his life depended on it. Like he needed to prove that there was something actually there and that Kris wasn’t just some random groupie along for the ride.
“Go,” Kris laughed against Adam’s lips, cupping his face like Adam was made of china. No one touched him like that. “Otherwise she’ll come in here and we don’t want that.”
Adam smiled and nudged Kris’ nose with his own. “I won’t be long.” he promised, and he wouldn’t be. He loved his fans, he did, but he wanted to see what Kris looked like when he was orgasming more.
“I’ll be here,” Kris said quietly, shifting off the vanity and into the chair.
As Adam opened the door, he saw Kris getting comfortable and he let himself believe Kris’ words.
Onto Part 6!