(no subject)
ug, I dont wanna do a damn thing right now.... Leia ramed my leg earlier which sent me falling face first. My nose and leg seem to have gotten the worst of it. Now its 10:30 pm and I'm trying to debate wether I should fail trying w/ gov or just quit. AND I still haven't even begun to address what I'm going to wear tommorow night to Katrina and Crystal's graduation. I dont even know how I'm going to get there since I'm lossing my entire paycheck tommorow to a licence plate ticket and court cost for defensive driving. Maybe I'll funnel the gas from the lawn mower (again). Damn I'm ghetto. After I deposit my check tommorow and pay my court fees I'll have about $10! (just enough for a bag of catfood.) I know everyone is thinking why the hell am I going if I can't afford the gas to get there.... b/c I promised months ago I would go and I dont want a guilt trip b/c I do ALWAYS bail/reschedule on them. Tommorow is also Rachel's birthday. I feel terrible b/c I cant even get her a fucking card or afford the gas to see her either!
I'm just thankful I have some pasta left. I'm going to try to eat once every other day so it will last for the nxt 2 wks. B/c nxt week I have to pay all my late credit card payments that should have been paid with tommorows check. I really fucking wish Rachel was moving in sooner.
It all just sucks and I don't have the clossure to move on to anything else. All I do is worry worry worry. I have offically become paralized by worry and anxiety. I can't fix anything nor do I find myself motivated to work on what needs addressing (ie failing gov, philosophy, ect.). I wanna sleep for two weeks and then have a week of scheduling dr apt, cleaning house, and getting my life in order again.
PS I HATE MY FUCKING NEIGHBORS..... Their side of the fence in my backyard has fallen down to the point that leia can and has gotten in their yard. I offered to fix it on Sunday but they declined and insisted they would fix it.... ITS THURSDAY AND ITS NOT FIXED!!!! My dog and I are fucking going insane. I'm taking her outside every 30 fucking minutes b/c shes too hyper and scratching and wining and barking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ROAR!
Now time to fix myself a nice STRONG drink and try to fall asleep!
I'm just thankful I have some pasta left. I'm going to try to eat once every other day so it will last for the nxt 2 wks. B/c nxt week I have to pay all my late credit card payments that should have been paid with tommorows check. I really fucking wish Rachel was moving in sooner.
It all just sucks and I don't have the clossure to move on to anything else. All I do is worry worry worry. I have offically become paralized by worry and anxiety. I can't fix anything nor do I find myself motivated to work on what needs addressing (ie failing gov, philosophy, ect.). I wanna sleep for two weeks and then have a week of scheduling dr apt, cleaning house, and getting my life in order again.
PS I HATE MY FUCKING NEIGHBORS..... Their side of the fence in my backyard has fallen down to the point that leia can and has gotten in their yard. I offered to fix it on Sunday but they declined and insisted they would fix it.... ITS THURSDAY AND ITS NOT FIXED!!!! My dog and I are fucking going insane. I'm taking her outside every 30 fucking minutes b/c shes too hyper and scratching and wining and barking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ROAR!
Now time to fix myself a nice STRONG drink and try to fall asleep!