(6) Had me at Hello
Had me at Hello
JaeJoong&Yunho
Romance, Humor, Drama, Angst
Kim Jaejoong's ex-boyfriend leaves him with a new room-mate, Jung Yunho.
{Must Listen: ♫Broken Arrow by Pixie Lott
.Stage 6
"Well, speak of the devil."
Yunho's eyes shifted towards his boss' pointed finger and then slowly turned his head to its direction, his oval eyes squinting as he tried to fight off the blazing rays of the sun. "What in the world-" he mumbled beneath his breath at the sight of a man with light, golden brown hair bouncing around behind bushes, a camera in his hands as snap-snap-snap, he took pictures of a toddler wobbling around the park obliviously, a small toy clown in her little hands. Yunho was suddenly unaware of his surroundings as he began to walk towards - well, Jaejoong, obviously.
"Jaejoongie-ah!" Yunho stumbled forward, his long legs half walking, half gliding. He grabbed the camera from Jaejoong's hands and cradled it with both hands, "I - I know you're a bit odd Jaejoong, just undeniably weird. But I didn't know you had these kinds of habits. You can't go running around taking pictures of other people's babies at the park as you hide behind bushes!" Yunho pauses, a slight frown on his face as he shakes his head, "I just don't know what to do about you Jaejoongie-ah, should I get you some help?"
"Uh," Jaejoong looks innocently confused, "Are you stupid?" He asks as he attempts to grab back his camera and fails, causing Jaejoong to cross his arms over his chest defensively. "Are you out of your mind Yunho-yah? I don't know what you're thinking up there," He says with his finger pointed to the side of his own head, "but something tells me its not good."
"Jaejoong-ah!" A woman in her early 30's interrupted them smoothly as she walked up behind Jaejoong, the same baby Jaejoong was taking pictures of in her arms, "Jaejoong is there a problem?" A curious expression masked her face as she scrutinized Yunho's face with her brown almond eyes.
"No Nuna, I just have an unexpected visitor," Jaejoong said taking the baby into his arms and began making cooing noises at her, "Yunho-yah, this is my older sister Eun Mi and Nuna, this is my room-mate Jung Yunho. He used to be straight but now he's madly and hopelessly, crazy in love with me." Jaejoong concluded with a content sigh and a slight smirk.
"Uh," Yunho mumbled out of shock, his face flushing by the second. "Hi." Was all he could say really, after being catapulted into an awkward situation, what else was there to say - what could he possibly say to make things a little less awkward?
Hi, I'm Jung Yunho. I'm your brother's roommate and I've been straight for twenty-six years up until recently when I started to fall for your whiny. hot-headed, big mouth, horse loving ant killing brother, he thought to himself, causing him to cough up a small laugh at his own stupidity.
The woman laughed heartily, her hands reaching out to tap Jaejoong on the back, "What did I tell you about embarrassing people! It's not nice Jaejoong." The woman said with a maternal tone, "I'm sorry for his manners. Jaejoong's always been a little - spoiled, and none of us had the heart to sew his mouth shut."
No, Yunho corrected her in his mind, no one had the ball's to sew his mouth shut, and in his mind, he laughed. Yeah it can happen, people laugh in their heads all the time. The majority are psycho's but still, the main point here is that it happens.
"I'm taking pictures of my baby niece, Cho Hee. She's really camera shy, so I had to hide in the bushes and I swear on your spleen Yunho-yah, some mama bee's were trying to make me the father of their baby bee's." Jaejoong muttered in annoyance but quickly reverted back to pretend biting his niece's protruding chubby cheeks. "I'm a photographer, Yunho-yah. I take pictures for a living." He said, pouted lips still pressed on chubby cheeks.
"Oh," Yunho laugh-sighed, "I had the impression that you were a rich boy living off your parents money. I guess I thought wrong, and I'm glad I was wrong. At least I know now you weren't just doing nothing at home. So, what kind of photographer are you?"
"I'm a horse photographer." Jaejoong declared with a pointed stare, "I get paid for taking pictures of horses."
"Really?" Yunho asks with an unsteady side glance that betrayed his puzzlement. The words I - don't - understand, rang loud and clear in his brain.
"No, not really," Jaejoong replied with a touch of exasperation. "I'm a celebrity slash fashion photographer."
"He's a celebrity stalker," Eun Mi intercepted, earning a hard look from Jaejoong. "He's a sasaeng fan." She went on further. This time Jaejoong shrieked, his face paling, his head shaking.
"I am not a sasaeng fan! How - how could you call me that!" Jaejoong asked, his eyebrows furrowing as a pained expression etched his face, "how can you say that about me, your beautiful baby brother?" He proceeded to take a step back, one hand on his heart, his other still holding baby Cho Hee who was now tracing a finger along Jaejoong's chin.
"Fine," Eun Mi said simply casting Jaejoong's hurtful glances aside, "He's paparazzi."
"I'm not one of those crazy ones though Yunho-yah, I don't stalk - too much, and I don't defame either. My pictures are purely about fashion and sense of style. So my pieces usually just end up in who wore it best articles and so on."
"Jaejoong seems to have taken a liking to you," Jaejoong's older sister said once Jaejoong went back to taking pictures of baby Cho Hee.
Yunho couldn't help but smile at the revelation, "I'm glad you think so." He started with a tone of uncertainty, "but sadly, I must disagree. He's been pretty hard on me."
Eun Mi nodded, her thin lips pouted in concentration as she eyed her daughter carefully, "Yunho-shii, a piece of advice - don't rush him. Jaejoong isn't one to like, or love quickly, and he takes his time. He tests the waters and once he feels that it is safe for him to let you in, then he will love you wholeheartedly with no limits. You see Yunho-shii, Jaejoong is trying to mend his broken heart right now. But he needs to do that himself, you can't do that for him."
"You really think I stand a chance?"
"I think," She said, finally turning to look Yunho in the eye, "Jaejoong allowed you to get to know the real him for a reason."
Beer, Whiskey, Tequila. Yunho laid out the bottles in order from what Jihoon had told him. "Beer first, you need him to feel and act like you're his very best friend in the world, beer will open the gates. Then, Whiskey, because it will make him talk, maybe emotionally but that means progress. You need him to be honest with himself and you, and Tequila - well," Yunho remembers Jihoon's devilish smirk, "It will more or less just fuck him up, make sure you don't drink too much or else you're finished. Game over."
"Oh Yunho-yah!" Jaejoong marveled, his voice high with delight. He sauntered over from the bathroom where he had just taken his evening shower. He towel dried his wet locks and then proceeded to shake his head dry like some playboy model or like a dog - but a model was more appealing to the mind, "What are we celebrating?" He asked quickly taking a seat on a cushion on the floor before the table. He eyed the bottles, his full lips quirking into a whimsical smile.
"I got a raise today." Yunho lied. Yunho was never known to be a liar, but he unfortunately couldn't think of one true thing he had to celebrate for.
"Oh good job, Yunho-yah!" Jaejoong said reaching over to give Yunho a short massage on the shoulders. "You're amazing after all!" He said with a genuine smile that made Yunho feel as light as a feather despite his bald-face lie.
Yunho, however, did not listen to Jihoon.
As the night advanced, Yunho unfortunately drank more than he should've and his plans were falling apart fast. He should have taken Jaejoong's high tolerance for alcohol to account in the past, so there he was spilling his life story when he should have been trying to coax everything and anything from his room-mate. Surely they were talking, or slur-talking, rather - but everything just went in one ear and out the other by Yunho's 10th shot and Jaejoong's - like 100th shot.
Somewhere between all the chaos, Yunho boldly revealed that in high school he was a hot shot dancer and Jaejoong busted out laughing at such a confession. "You! A dancer! Chubby chubby Yunho-yah!" He teased, but proceeded to coax Yunho into doing a few moves. "Prove it, show me your moves Yunho-yah. Show it to meeeee, sexy lady uh!"
The Tequila moved him up and down and around and around, and before he knew it he was pop and locking to the music in his head. Drunken feet swaying him as he did the wave, yeah - the fucking wave, followed by a random taekwondo kick or two, or five. Somewhere in there, he began to beat box, well kind of, it more like he was spitting into his hands but he thought he sounded a-fucking-mazing. He didn't - not at all.
But Jaejoong didn't seem to mind, as he also got to his feet and began to make gangster hand gestures, his cheeks flushed deep crimson as he began rapping, "yo yo yo, one two three fooouuu, annyeonghase-yo, Kim Jaejoong ie-yo!"
Shit, they were so faded.
When things began to blur and their hype slowly took to a calm, Yunho found Jaejoong's head in his lap. "Your hair, why did you dye it this color?" Yunho slurred, clumsy fingers stroking Jaejoong's head.
"Back then," Jaejoong began, he eyelashes fluttering slowly, "Seung-heon told me I had no presence, he said Jaejoong, sometimes I don't notice you even though you're the only one in the room with me and I just didn't want to be invisible anymore. I thought if I did something different he would start to really look at me. So I cut my hair short and dyed it blond," He paused and inhaled deeply, "But he didn't and I was left looking like a wannabe boy band member."
There was a brief silence for a moment or two before Jaejoong began to speak again, "You know Yunho-yah, Seung-heon wasn't a bad man, I think you of all people would know that. He's a kind, loving man, and I'm sure at one point he must have loved me. But he was so confused, and he had to choose. That's really when he started treating me like I wasn't there." He smiled, a pained smile, but a smile nonetheless, "I think, maybe, he wanted to hate me, or he wanted me to hate him and leave him. But I didn't and I made it harder for him to leave. Just because I couldn't let go."
"Your hair, It looks good on you," Yunho whispered, ignoring Jaejoong's rant about Seung-heon. He was the last person he wanted to talk about. Yunho twirled a soft strand of golden brown around his finger, "have you considered auburn, it would fit you nicely." Yunho suggested, his fingers leaving Jaejoong's hair. With slow, deliberate movement's Yunho traced his fingertips along the surface of Jaejoong's porcelain face in which he counted six moles.
Jaejoong's hooded eyes fluttered open, his expression startled - but only for a moment, for which he finally allowed himself to be taken in by Yunho, "You know Yunho-yah," Jaejoong said with warm smile, his eyes wide and searching as he stared up at Yunho's expectant face, "You really scare me sometimes."
"Yeah?" Yunho responded, a little taken-aback.
"It's like," Jaejoong paused, his voice unsteady as he fought to find the right words, "It's like, a part of me knows you're the one. That I belong to you, or with you - but I can't do it." Jaejoong paused again, "I can't let you in, because this isn't the right time for us."
Inspite of Jaejoong's words, Yunho found himself smiling. a toothy accomplished smile. "Is this a confession of your feelings Jaejoongie-ah?" He asked, his tone almost teasing. "You want to be with me too?" Yunho smiled, leaning forward towards Jaejoong's face, "You want me as much as I want you?"
Jaejoong almost nodded, but caught himself, and turned his head in embarrassment. "Don't do this to me now Yunho-yah," Jaejoong almost whined and abruptly sat himself up as he poured himself another shot and downed it, then another. Two hard hits to the head.
"No. no. Don't do that Jaejoongie-ah." Yunho said fondly. "Jaejoongie-ah." He whispered as leveled his face with Jaejoong's and slowly, but without hesitation pressed his lips onto Jaejoong's. In that moment, the world didn't stop like before, but instead it was as if the suite circled around them as they sat in the middle, two lovers melted together. Heat surged his body as Jaejoong kissed him back, pouted lips finding Yunho's bottom lip. "Shit," Yunho managed to whisper as his throbbing hands roamed his room-mates body, his hands finding his way into Jaejoong's shirt, hands quick to feel as he felt Jaejoong's hands trying to unbutton his pants.
"Shit." He swore again, and he laid Jaejoong down on the floor, lips still attached as he laid on top of him, fast hands removing clothes as both Yunho and Jaejoong laid half naked as they caressed each other.
Yunho's been infatuated, surely he had been. But his unwillingness to commit always held him back from having any sort of relationships in the past, and yet a man - a man like Jaejoong was able to capture his heart in mere months. Yunho was unable to pinpoint the exact moment he fell in love with Jaejoong, maybe it was the first time he laid eyes on him, or the first time Jaejoong scolded him, or maybe - maybe it was when Yunho saw Jaejoong cry for the very first time. Or possibly, he just fell in love over and over again with the only person that challenged and controlled him and made him feel like no other person could.
"Ugh," Jaejoong moaned, "it won't - I can't" Jaejoong whimpered, lips still pressed onto Yunho's, and Yunho felt his heart just stop and tremble and for a second he felt as if he were suffocating, "I can't unbutton," Jaejoong fussed, referring to him being unable to unbutton his own jeans. Yunho exhaled, and felt relief fill his body from head to toe.
Jaejoong's clumsy fingers lingered upon his own pants, groaning as he struggled to unbutton it. "Kiss me," he grabbed at Yunho, "Kiss me now I said." Jaejoong demanded, his head lolled back as he closed his eyes. Yunho continued to rain soft kisses on the beauty before him.
"Ugh," Jaejoong said again, "Come, Seung -"
Yunho moved back, startled. Seung?
Jaejoong opened his eyes, realizing what he had just said. Without words, he shook his head and sucked in his cheeks. He stared at Yunho with sad, apologetic eyes, his expression as fragile as eggs in a carton, and Yunho knew he couldn't possibly get upset at him. The heart wants what the heart wants, and Jaejoong's heart did not want Yunho.
"I'm sorry Yunho-yah." Was all Jaejoong said, his voice saturated with emotion.
Yunho nodded, abruptly standing up, "I'm sorry too," he replied back, and then retreated to his room, leaving Jaejoong to sit alone in his own affliction.
And as if nothing had happened, they resumed back to their daily activities.
Or, well, kind-of.
Jaejoong took to drinking at Junsu's bar everyday with Yoochun at hand as his very best friend in the whole wide world.
And Yunho, well, he decided to let go of his feelings towards his roommate Kim Jaejoong. It was a vicious cycle, loving someone who loved someone else, who loved someone else and Yunho didn't want to be a victim of that anymore. His love just couldn't - wouldn't, reach Jaejoong.
But even so, every night he would go to pick Jaejoong up from his night of drinking and singing sad karaoke songs. Yoochun would call, and Yunho would come only to find Jaejoong still taking shots, his face red as a old-dutch ketchup chip, or vomiting into the cushions of the booth as Yoochun tried to calm the pale-face grief stricken Junsu, assuring him that Jaejoong would pay for the damages.
"Yunho-yah," Jaejoong softly moaned, "you're finally here to bring me back home?"
"Yes," Yunho replied, his voice hard as he took Jaejoong's arm and led him out of the booth "let's go home."
"Okay Yunho-yah," Jaejoong answered obediently as he staggered into Yunho's arms.
"Hey," Changmin appeared before them, his face questioning as he eyed Jaejoong, "I think I saw Seung-heon outside, did you invite him here Yunho-shi?"
And in a blink of an eye, Jaejoong took off running out the door with Yunho following at his heel. He watched as Jaejoong searched, and searched. The look on his face dazed and expectant, a desperate expression masked his flushed cheeks.
Yunho's heart ached for him, almost as much as his heart ached for himself.
And finally, Jaejoong grounded a complete stop upon finding Seung-heon with his wife, holding her hand as they walked down the side walk.
"Seung-heon!" Jaejoong called out to him. To Yunho's surprise, Seung-heon turned around only to find Jaejoong standing a short distance away from him. Yunho studied his old friend's face, his expression both sad and genuinely sorry. Jaejoong said no more, but instead, he waved a short wave and smiled through the tears that fell from his glassy eyes. Seung-heon also seemed to have been fighting his emotions as he forced a smile, despite the glint of despair in his eyes and waved back.
"Goodbye Seung-heon, have a happy life," Jaejoong whispered to himself as one last tear fell from his eye.
With one swift turn of the heel, Jaejoong faced Yunho, his face wet with tears, his voice shaken, "Yunho-yah, just hold me. Please."
And Yunho did, maybe just for a little while more.
+
1. well hello darlings! I'm so happy I finally was able to write this chapter. I'm so sorry for the wait, as you guys might have guessed it's back to school time, ugh!
2. I think maybe this was my longest chapter yet & I'm quite pleased about it! -laughs-
3. & well, um if you guys would like to please add me on twitter & tumblr
4. & as always, comments are well loved & appreciated♥
JaeJoong&Yunho
Romance, Humor, Drama, Angst
Kim Jaejoong's ex-boyfriend leaves him with a new room-mate, Jung Yunho.
{Must Listen: ♫Broken Arrow by Pixie Lott
.Stage 6
"Well, speak of the devil."
Yunho's eyes shifted towards his boss' pointed finger and then slowly turned his head to its direction, his oval eyes squinting as he tried to fight off the blazing rays of the sun. "What in the world-" he mumbled beneath his breath at the sight of a man with light, golden brown hair bouncing around behind bushes, a camera in his hands as snap-snap-snap, he took pictures of a toddler wobbling around the park obliviously, a small toy clown in her little hands. Yunho was suddenly unaware of his surroundings as he began to walk towards - well, Jaejoong, obviously.
"Jaejoongie-ah!" Yunho stumbled forward, his long legs half walking, half gliding. He grabbed the camera from Jaejoong's hands and cradled it with both hands, "I - I know you're a bit odd Jaejoong, just undeniably weird. But I didn't know you had these kinds of habits. You can't go running around taking pictures of other people's babies at the park as you hide behind bushes!" Yunho pauses, a slight frown on his face as he shakes his head, "I just don't know what to do about you Jaejoongie-ah, should I get you some help?"
"Uh," Jaejoong looks innocently confused, "Are you stupid?" He asks as he attempts to grab back his camera and fails, causing Jaejoong to cross his arms over his chest defensively. "Are you out of your mind Yunho-yah? I don't know what you're thinking up there," He says with his finger pointed to the side of his own head, "but something tells me its not good."
"Jaejoong-ah!" A woman in her early 30's interrupted them smoothly as she walked up behind Jaejoong, the same baby Jaejoong was taking pictures of in her arms, "Jaejoong is there a problem?" A curious expression masked her face as she scrutinized Yunho's face with her brown almond eyes.
"No Nuna, I just have an unexpected visitor," Jaejoong said taking the baby into his arms and began making cooing noises at her, "Yunho-yah, this is my older sister Eun Mi and Nuna, this is my room-mate Jung Yunho. He used to be straight but now he's madly and hopelessly, crazy in love with me." Jaejoong concluded with a content sigh and a slight smirk.
"Uh," Yunho mumbled out of shock, his face flushing by the second. "Hi." Was all he could say really, after being catapulted into an awkward situation, what else was there to say - what could he possibly say to make things a little less awkward?
Hi, I'm Jung Yunho. I'm your brother's roommate and I've been straight for twenty-six years up until recently when I started to fall for your whiny. hot-headed, big mouth, horse loving ant killing brother, he thought to himself, causing him to cough up a small laugh at his own stupidity.
The woman laughed heartily, her hands reaching out to tap Jaejoong on the back, "What did I tell you about embarrassing people! It's not nice Jaejoong." The woman said with a maternal tone, "I'm sorry for his manners. Jaejoong's always been a little - spoiled, and none of us had the heart to sew his mouth shut."
No, Yunho corrected her in his mind, no one had the ball's to sew his mouth shut, and in his mind, he laughed. Yeah it can happen, people laugh in their heads all the time. The majority are psycho's but still, the main point here is that it happens.
"I'm taking pictures of my baby niece, Cho Hee. She's really camera shy, so I had to hide in the bushes and I swear on your spleen Yunho-yah, some mama bee's were trying to make me the father of their baby bee's." Jaejoong muttered in annoyance but quickly reverted back to pretend biting his niece's protruding chubby cheeks. "I'm a photographer, Yunho-yah. I take pictures for a living." He said, pouted lips still pressed on chubby cheeks.
"Oh," Yunho laugh-sighed, "I had the impression that you were a rich boy living off your parents money. I guess I thought wrong, and I'm glad I was wrong. At least I know now you weren't just doing nothing at home. So, what kind of photographer are you?"
"I'm a horse photographer." Jaejoong declared with a pointed stare, "I get paid for taking pictures of horses."
"Really?" Yunho asks with an unsteady side glance that betrayed his puzzlement. The words I - don't - understand, rang loud and clear in his brain.
"No, not really," Jaejoong replied with a touch of exasperation. "I'm a celebrity slash fashion photographer."
"He's a celebrity stalker," Eun Mi intercepted, earning a hard look from Jaejoong. "He's a sasaeng fan." She went on further. This time Jaejoong shrieked, his face paling, his head shaking.
"I am not a sasaeng fan! How - how could you call me that!" Jaejoong asked, his eyebrows furrowing as a pained expression etched his face, "how can you say that about me, your beautiful baby brother?" He proceeded to take a step back, one hand on his heart, his other still holding baby Cho Hee who was now tracing a finger along Jaejoong's chin.
"Fine," Eun Mi said simply casting Jaejoong's hurtful glances aside, "He's paparazzi."
"I'm not one of those crazy ones though Yunho-yah, I don't stalk - too much, and I don't defame either. My pictures are purely about fashion and sense of style. So my pieces usually just end up in who wore it best articles and so on."
"Jaejoong seems to have taken a liking to you," Jaejoong's older sister said once Jaejoong went back to taking pictures of baby Cho Hee.
Yunho couldn't help but smile at the revelation, "I'm glad you think so." He started with a tone of uncertainty, "but sadly, I must disagree. He's been pretty hard on me."
Eun Mi nodded, her thin lips pouted in concentration as she eyed her daughter carefully, "Yunho-shii, a piece of advice - don't rush him. Jaejoong isn't one to like, or love quickly, and he takes his time. He tests the waters and once he feels that it is safe for him to let you in, then he will love you wholeheartedly with no limits. You see Yunho-shii, Jaejoong is trying to mend his broken heart right now. But he needs to do that himself, you can't do that for him."
"You really think I stand a chance?"
"I think," She said, finally turning to look Yunho in the eye, "Jaejoong allowed you to get to know the real him for a reason."
Beer, Whiskey, Tequila. Yunho laid out the bottles in order from what Jihoon had told him. "Beer first, you need him to feel and act like you're his very best friend in the world, beer will open the gates. Then, Whiskey, because it will make him talk, maybe emotionally but that means progress. You need him to be honest with himself and you, and Tequila - well," Yunho remembers Jihoon's devilish smirk, "It will more or less just fuck him up, make sure you don't drink too much or else you're finished. Game over."
"Oh Yunho-yah!" Jaejoong marveled, his voice high with delight. He sauntered over from the bathroom where he had just taken his evening shower. He towel dried his wet locks and then proceeded to shake his head dry like some playboy model or like a dog - but a model was more appealing to the mind, "What are we celebrating?" He asked quickly taking a seat on a cushion on the floor before the table. He eyed the bottles, his full lips quirking into a whimsical smile.
"I got a raise today." Yunho lied. Yunho was never known to be a liar, but he unfortunately couldn't think of one true thing he had to celebrate for.
"Oh good job, Yunho-yah!" Jaejoong said reaching over to give Yunho a short massage on the shoulders. "You're amazing after all!" He said with a genuine smile that made Yunho feel as light as a feather despite his bald-face lie.
Yunho, however, did not listen to Jihoon.
As the night advanced, Yunho unfortunately drank more than he should've and his plans were falling apart fast. He should have taken Jaejoong's high tolerance for alcohol to account in the past, so there he was spilling his life story when he should have been trying to coax everything and anything from his room-mate. Surely they were talking, or slur-talking, rather - but everything just went in one ear and out the other by Yunho's 10th shot and Jaejoong's - like 100th shot.
Somewhere between all the chaos, Yunho boldly revealed that in high school he was a hot shot dancer and Jaejoong busted out laughing at such a confession. "You! A dancer! Chubby chubby Yunho-yah!" He teased, but proceeded to coax Yunho into doing a few moves. "Prove it, show me your moves Yunho-yah. Show it to meeeee, sexy lady uh!"
The Tequila moved him up and down and around and around, and before he knew it he was pop and locking to the music in his head. Drunken feet swaying him as he did the wave, yeah - the fucking wave, followed by a random taekwondo kick or two, or five. Somewhere in there, he began to beat box, well kind of, it more like he was spitting into his hands but he thought he sounded a-fucking-mazing. He didn't - not at all.
But Jaejoong didn't seem to mind, as he also got to his feet and began to make gangster hand gestures, his cheeks flushed deep crimson as he began rapping, "yo yo yo, one two three fooouuu, annyeonghase-yo, Kim Jaejoong ie-yo!"
Shit, they were so faded.
When things began to blur and their hype slowly took to a calm, Yunho found Jaejoong's head in his lap. "Your hair, why did you dye it this color?" Yunho slurred, clumsy fingers stroking Jaejoong's head.
"Back then," Jaejoong began, he eyelashes fluttering slowly, "Seung-heon told me I had no presence, he said Jaejoong, sometimes I don't notice you even though you're the only one in the room with me and I just didn't want to be invisible anymore. I thought if I did something different he would start to really look at me. So I cut my hair short and dyed it blond," He paused and inhaled deeply, "But he didn't and I was left looking like a wannabe boy band member."
There was a brief silence for a moment or two before Jaejoong began to speak again, "You know Yunho-yah, Seung-heon wasn't a bad man, I think you of all people would know that. He's a kind, loving man, and I'm sure at one point he must have loved me. But he was so confused, and he had to choose. That's really when he started treating me like I wasn't there." He smiled, a pained smile, but a smile nonetheless, "I think, maybe, he wanted to hate me, or he wanted me to hate him and leave him. But I didn't and I made it harder for him to leave. Just because I couldn't let go."
"Your hair, It looks good on you," Yunho whispered, ignoring Jaejoong's rant about Seung-heon. He was the last person he wanted to talk about. Yunho twirled a soft strand of golden brown around his finger, "have you considered auburn, it would fit you nicely." Yunho suggested, his fingers leaving Jaejoong's hair. With slow, deliberate movement's Yunho traced his fingertips along the surface of Jaejoong's porcelain face in which he counted six moles.
Jaejoong's hooded eyes fluttered open, his expression startled - but only for a moment, for which he finally allowed himself to be taken in by Yunho, "You know Yunho-yah," Jaejoong said with warm smile, his eyes wide and searching as he stared up at Yunho's expectant face, "You really scare me sometimes."
"Yeah?" Yunho responded, a little taken-aback.
"It's like," Jaejoong paused, his voice unsteady as he fought to find the right words, "It's like, a part of me knows you're the one. That I belong to you, or with you - but I can't do it." Jaejoong paused again, "I can't let you in, because this isn't the right time for us."
Inspite of Jaejoong's words, Yunho found himself smiling. a toothy accomplished smile. "Is this a confession of your feelings Jaejoongie-ah?" He asked, his tone almost teasing. "You want to be with me too?" Yunho smiled, leaning forward towards Jaejoong's face, "You want me as much as I want you?"
Jaejoong almost nodded, but caught himself, and turned his head in embarrassment. "Don't do this to me now Yunho-yah," Jaejoong almost whined and abruptly sat himself up as he poured himself another shot and downed it, then another. Two hard hits to the head.
"No. no. Don't do that Jaejoongie-ah." Yunho said fondly. "Jaejoongie-ah." He whispered as leveled his face with Jaejoong's and slowly, but without hesitation pressed his lips onto Jaejoong's. In that moment, the world didn't stop like before, but instead it was as if the suite circled around them as they sat in the middle, two lovers melted together. Heat surged his body as Jaejoong kissed him back, pouted lips finding Yunho's bottom lip. "Shit," Yunho managed to whisper as his throbbing hands roamed his room-mates body, his hands finding his way into Jaejoong's shirt, hands quick to feel as he felt Jaejoong's hands trying to unbutton his pants.
"Shit." He swore again, and he laid Jaejoong down on the floor, lips still attached as he laid on top of him, fast hands removing clothes as both Yunho and Jaejoong laid half naked as they caressed each other.
Yunho's been infatuated, surely he had been. But his unwillingness to commit always held him back from having any sort of relationships in the past, and yet a man - a man like Jaejoong was able to capture his heart in mere months. Yunho was unable to pinpoint the exact moment he fell in love with Jaejoong, maybe it was the first time he laid eyes on him, or the first time Jaejoong scolded him, or maybe - maybe it was when Yunho saw Jaejoong cry for the very first time. Or possibly, he just fell in love over and over again with the only person that challenged and controlled him and made him feel like no other person could.
"Ugh," Jaejoong moaned, "it won't - I can't" Jaejoong whimpered, lips still pressed onto Yunho's, and Yunho felt his heart just stop and tremble and for a second he felt as if he were suffocating, "I can't unbutton," Jaejoong fussed, referring to him being unable to unbutton his own jeans. Yunho exhaled, and felt relief fill his body from head to toe.
Jaejoong's clumsy fingers lingered upon his own pants, groaning as he struggled to unbutton it. "Kiss me," he grabbed at Yunho, "Kiss me now I said." Jaejoong demanded, his head lolled back as he closed his eyes. Yunho continued to rain soft kisses on the beauty before him.
"Ugh," Jaejoong said again, "Come, Seung -"
Yunho moved back, startled. Seung?
Jaejoong opened his eyes, realizing what he had just said. Without words, he shook his head and sucked in his cheeks. He stared at Yunho with sad, apologetic eyes, his expression as fragile as eggs in a carton, and Yunho knew he couldn't possibly get upset at him. The heart wants what the heart wants, and Jaejoong's heart did not want Yunho.
"I'm sorry Yunho-yah." Was all Jaejoong said, his voice saturated with emotion.
Yunho nodded, abruptly standing up, "I'm sorry too," he replied back, and then retreated to his room, leaving Jaejoong to sit alone in his own affliction.
And as if nothing had happened, they resumed back to their daily activities.
Or, well, kind-of.
Jaejoong took to drinking at Junsu's bar everyday with Yoochun at hand as his very best friend in the whole wide world.
And Yunho, well, he decided to let go of his feelings towards his roommate Kim Jaejoong. It was a vicious cycle, loving someone who loved someone else, who loved someone else and Yunho didn't want to be a victim of that anymore. His love just couldn't - wouldn't, reach Jaejoong.
But even so, every night he would go to pick Jaejoong up from his night of drinking and singing sad karaoke songs. Yoochun would call, and Yunho would come only to find Jaejoong still taking shots, his face red as a old-dutch ketchup chip, or vomiting into the cushions of the booth as Yoochun tried to calm the pale-face grief stricken Junsu, assuring him that Jaejoong would pay for the damages.
"Yunho-yah," Jaejoong softly moaned, "you're finally here to bring me back home?"
"Yes," Yunho replied, his voice hard as he took Jaejoong's arm and led him out of the booth "let's go home."
"Okay Yunho-yah," Jaejoong answered obediently as he staggered into Yunho's arms.
"Hey," Changmin appeared before them, his face questioning as he eyed Jaejoong, "I think I saw Seung-heon outside, did you invite him here Yunho-shi?"
And in a blink of an eye, Jaejoong took off running out the door with Yunho following at his heel. He watched as Jaejoong searched, and searched. The look on his face dazed and expectant, a desperate expression masked his flushed cheeks.
Yunho's heart ached for him, almost as much as his heart ached for himself.
And finally, Jaejoong grounded a complete stop upon finding Seung-heon with his wife, holding her hand as they walked down the side walk.
"Seung-heon!" Jaejoong called out to him. To Yunho's surprise, Seung-heon turned around only to find Jaejoong standing a short distance away from him. Yunho studied his old friend's face, his expression both sad and genuinely sorry. Jaejoong said no more, but instead, he waved a short wave and smiled through the tears that fell from his glassy eyes. Seung-heon also seemed to have been fighting his emotions as he forced a smile, despite the glint of despair in his eyes and waved back.
"Goodbye Seung-heon, have a happy life," Jaejoong whispered to himself as one last tear fell from his eye.
With one swift turn of the heel, Jaejoong faced Yunho, his face wet with tears, his voice shaken, "Yunho-yah, just hold me. Please."
And Yunho did, maybe just for a little while more.
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1. well hello darlings! I'm so happy I finally was able to write this chapter. I'm so sorry for the wait, as you guys might have guessed it's back to school time, ugh!
2. I think maybe this was my longest chapter yet & I'm quite pleased about it! -laughs-
3. & well, um if you guys would like to please add me on twitter & tumblr
4. & as always, comments are well loved & appreciated♥