回家
回家
sehun/luhan, pg-13, au (implied prostituion), ~2,000 words
luhan goes home with a boy again and again.
"一起回家" 这四个字，不管在哪个生命历程，都有很浪漫的意义。
"一起" 代表这件事一个人无法独立完成，
"回家" 意味着背后的温馨情愫。
第一次与你一起回家的人你一辈子都不可能忘记。
the four words - "yi qi hui jia" (to return home together), have a very romantic meaning, no matter which stage of life we are in.
"yi qi" (together) represents that this can't be completed alone.
"hui jia" (return home) implies the warm sentiments behind it.
it's impossible to forget the person you went home with for the first time.
- 那些年，我们一起追的女孩
it's always on rainy days like these that luhan's kindness spills over, washing away his doubts and drowning him with the rain. his mother always told him: a good deed a day, and he tries his best to uphold this doctrine. but he's too settled with his whole routined life in seoul. the whole pick-up garbage or holding doors business is boring him. yixing laughs because it's all very absurd when luhan explains his logic.
so here luhan stands, staring into the hazy eyes of a boy whose porcelain skin seems awfully pale against the grayness. the boy looks familiar, but not enough to link with a name or memory.
"are you hungry?" luhan asks, giving no thought to the question. the boy only nods lightly, afraid to seem too eager. sadness leaks through his eyes and luhan takes his hand.
"你说啥? 你带了个陌生男孩回家?" (what did you say? you brought a stranger home?) yixing stops wiping tables and stares at luhan with a dumbfounded expression.
"别那么大声, 你想全世界都知道啊?" (don't be so loud, do you want the whole world to know?)
"那当然啦! 你连床都不让我坐, 你竟然带个陌生人回家!" (of course! you don't even let me sit on your bed, yet you bring a stranger home!) yixing feels as if it's his duty to inform the world, or at least their immediate friend circle. it's certainly unfair because luhan always kicks him off the bed when he comes over, leaving him and tao fighting over the computer chair.
it's 2pm and customers start filing into the cafe because afternoon classes ended. "好啦, 别大惊小怪的, 做你的工作去吧." (ok, don't make a fuss over nothing, go do your work.) yixing doesn't get a chance to retort because wufan strolls in and yixing promised that he won't get his order wrong today.
"什么样的人?" (what kind of person is he?) yixing asks when business calms down.
"挺高的, 瘦瘦的, 眼神带着伤感, 皮肤白得透明…有照顾他的冲动." (pretty tall, skinny, sad expression in his eyes, skin is a translucent white…i have an impulse to take care of him.)
"i'm luhan," luhan shouts from his room, changing into drier clothes. "i'll get you clothes, make yourself at home! " luhan comes out with a change of clothes for the boy, but he's still standing by the doorway, a bit too close to the wall.
"sehun…i'm sehun," he murmurs as if he's telling himself.
luhan smiles and sehun thinks he must be an angel.
"i didn't want to get your floors wet," sehun says as he lifts up his shirt. his skin smooth, clean like a fresh new canvas.
"you're so pale, you must bruise easily."
sehun moves to cover his chest. "yeah, sometimes."
"come, i'll cook." it's surprising how quick luhan gets used to holding sehun's hand, like it's the only natural thing to do. sehun doesn't mind the warmth against his cold fingers.
watching luhan cook in the kitchen brings back warm memories for sehun. but the smell in the air isn't of korean food and sehun laughs at himself.
he mouths lu han carefully, the first of many times, treasuring each syllable.
"do you have a home?" luhan asks, but he wonders if it's the right thing to ask after eating dinner over a movie.
"i think so," sehun replies and luhan stops holding his breath.
"well, you can stay here until you are sure." luhan squeezes sehun's hand and gets up to wash the dishes.
"why?" sehun bites his lower lip, never good with words. "um, why this…"
"kindness?" luhan finishes for sehun, "i don't know. i told my friend and he thought i was insane. i didn't really think about it when i saw you. there was something in me that just wanted to take care of you."
luhan looks back and sehun is behind him, playing with the hems of his shirt.
"plus, you looked familiar. i thought you were one of my customers."
sehun lowers his head onto luhan's shoulder, guilty. he can't bring himself to tell luhan about the countless times that he wanted to go into the café because the smell of freshly baked bread and cake was intoxicating, but didn't because it seemed like a place unfitting for a boy like him.
"i'll do housework in exchange for my stay." luhan hands him a plate.
sehun does more than housework. he picks luhan up from work so they can buy groceries together. sometimes they make trips to the bubble tea shop nearby because sehun doesn't like coffee and luhan gives in. sehun's body fits perfectly with luhan's on the bed and luhan gives up. sehun opens up and luhan notices the sadness only if he looks closely.
we are often reminded that good things come and go as fast as taking a breath. inhale we are holding hands and the temperature outside is just right for us to be pressed against each other. exhale we are left with the shells of memories and the ghosts of you and me lingering in the room.
which is why luhan tells himself he shouldn't be surprised that sehun hasn't come home in two days. sehun didn't have an obligation to come back, and he was the one who told sehun that he can stay until he's sure of home. so luhan thinks he'll be alright. he'll just go back to picking up trash and holding doors.
"喂喂喂! 鹿晗!" (hey hey hey! luhan!) a voice calls out and luhan turns with wide eyes. yixing points to the counter.
"咖啡都倒出来了. 你这几天怎么都无精打采的? 想失了魂似的." (you spilled the coffee. why have you been so listless these days? like you lost your soul.)
"没事, 就累了." (nothing, just tired.)
yixing wipes the coffee off the counter and takes the cup from luhan's hand. "被世勋折腾的?" (sehun's giving you trouble?)
luhan bitterly smiles.
luhan starts to think that rainy days are not as bad as yixing makes them out to be. sure clothes get wet and rooms get damp, but then there's sehun.
somehow, he's sitting in the same spot luhan originally found him in. but this time, sehun looks slightly different. sehun was afraid luhan would notice, so he buries his mouth into his arms even though he's already wearing a face mask.
"i got you a gift," sehun mumbles, extending his arm out. it's a small brown louis vuitton bag and luhan is confused. "i remember seeing your wallet and how worn-out it was…"
"where did you get the money?"
"i got a job." luhan doesn't believe it, but he has no choice.
there's something different about sehun ever since he has returned. sehun tries to hide it, but it stands out too much compared to happier days. he avoids meeting luhan's eyes when they talk and decides to sleep on the couch. he tells luhan, "i'm dirty." and luhan accepts even though he worries that he stepped into sehun's comfort zone when he asked sehun about the bruise on his lip.
"i'm just happy that you're back," luhan tells sehun, fixing the younger boy's bangs. "you need a trim."
sehun stares into luhan's glassy eyes and wonders if this is what forever feels like.
"it was lonely, sehun."
inhale. exhale. this time sehun disappears for more than two days. luhan worries and hope it starts raining soon.
like an unspoken promise between the weather and luhan, sehun appears on the next rainy day, and this time with bigger bags.
"i don't need these gifts," luhan says, not wanting to let go of sehun's hand when they step inside.
"but…"
"i just want you to stop disappearing."
when luhan finds sehun for the fifth time, he teaches sehun the word 回家. he tells sehun that hui jia means to return home and sehun wonders if that means it's ok to call luhan home.
when sehun picks luhan up, he hears luhan tell yixing 我跟世勋一起回家啦. "what does that mean?"
luhan grins, happy with sehun's curiousity. "yi qi means together. wo, " luhan points to himself, "and shi xun is your name. you know hui jia, so what do you think it means?"
sehun smiles into the back of luhan's hand, eyes curved like crescent moons.
after the seventh disappearance, luhan notices the bruises on sehun's abdomen when he steps out to get water. the night colored the apartment a heavy black, but luhan can still see blue and purple on sehun's pale skin, spread out like watercolor.
he feels wrong for lifting up sehun's shirt for further inspection, but he doesn't stop when he comes across what seems to be rope marks.
"your bruises," luhan says as he continues to spread jam on his toast the next morning. "did you get into a fight?"
sehun can't figure out whether luhan is too dense or fight is just an euphemism for what caused all the bruises.
luhan starts to notice more bruises and worries eat him up, especially when sehun flinches at his touch and hides away in the bathroom.
luhan becomes restless and resorts to consulting yixing. wufan overhears and tells luhan, "i've seen a tall and pale boy around the love hotel district. if you want, i can investigate for you?"
except luhan doesn't want anything else but sehun home.
and all he does is cry into sehun's shirt when he figures everything out and sees an empty apartment.
tired of forgetting how to breathe every time he opens his apartment door, luhan packs up the gifts into their original bags with a note and leaves them where he usually finds sehun. he takes another route home on rainy days and learns to live with loneliness.
inhale. exhale.
it's always on rainy days that feelings spill over and it seems inevitable to feel incredibly sad. luhan dislikes this combination.
he left his umbrella home today and let yixing leave early, so he's counting cash in the register twice to make sure. the bell rings, signaling a customer. "we're closed." but luhan doesn't hear another ring.
he looks up and believes that he'll like rainy days again.
"一起回家吧, 鹿晗."
---
thank you for reading. sorry if it's all over the place, wrote it from night to dawn so no beta.
inspired by quote above and this.
sehun/luhan, pg-13, au (implied prostituion), ~2,000 words
luhan goes home with a boy again and again.
"一起回家" 这四个字，不管在哪个生命历程，都有很浪漫的意义。
"一起" 代表这件事一个人无法独立完成，
"回家" 意味着背后的温馨情愫。
第一次与你一起回家的人你一辈子都不可能忘记。
the four words - "yi qi hui jia" (to return home together), have a very romantic meaning, no matter which stage of life we are in.
"yi qi" (together) represents that this can't be completed alone.
"hui jia" (return home) implies the warm sentiments behind it.
it's impossible to forget the person you went home with for the first time.
- 那些年，我们一起追的女孩
it's always on rainy days like these that luhan's kindness spills over, washing away his doubts and drowning him with the rain. his mother always told him: a good deed a day, and he tries his best to uphold this doctrine. but he's too settled with his whole routined life in seoul. the whole pick-up garbage or holding doors business is boring him. yixing laughs because it's all very absurd when luhan explains his logic.
so here luhan stands, staring into the hazy eyes of a boy whose porcelain skin seems awfully pale against the grayness. the boy looks familiar, but not enough to link with a name or memory.
"are you hungry?" luhan asks, giving no thought to the question. the boy only nods lightly, afraid to seem too eager. sadness leaks through his eyes and luhan takes his hand.
"你说啥? 你带了个陌生男孩回家?" (what did you say? you brought a stranger home?) yixing stops wiping tables and stares at luhan with a dumbfounded expression.
"别那么大声, 你想全世界都知道啊?" (don't be so loud, do you want the whole world to know?)
"那当然啦! 你连床都不让我坐, 你竟然带个陌生人回家!" (of course! you don't even let me sit on your bed, yet you bring a stranger home!) yixing feels as if it's his duty to inform the world, or at least their immediate friend circle. it's certainly unfair because luhan always kicks him off the bed when he comes over, leaving him and tao fighting over the computer chair.
it's 2pm and customers start filing into the cafe because afternoon classes ended. "好啦, 别大惊小怪的, 做你的工作去吧." (ok, don't make a fuss over nothing, go do your work.) yixing doesn't get a chance to retort because wufan strolls in and yixing promised that he won't get his order wrong today.
"什么样的人?" (what kind of person is he?) yixing asks when business calms down.
"挺高的, 瘦瘦的, 眼神带着伤感, 皮肤白得透明…有照顾他的冲动." (pretty tall, skinny, sad expression in his eyes, skin is a translucent white…i have an impulse to take care of him.)
"i'm luhan," luhan shouts from his room, changing into drier clothes. "i'll get you clothes, make yourself at home! " luhan comes out with a change of clothes for the boy, but he's still standing by the doorway, a bit too close to the wall.
"sehun…i'm sehun," he murmurs as if he's telling himself.
luhan smiles and sehun thinks he must be an angel.
"i didn't want to get your floors wet," sehun says as he lifts up his shirt. his skin smooth, clean like a fresh new canvas.
"you're so pale, you must bruise easily."
sehun moves to cover his chest. "yeah, sometimes."
"come, i'll cook." it's surprising how quick luhan gets used to holding sehun's hand, like it's the only natural thing to do. sehun doesn't mind the warmth against his cold fingers.
watching luhan cook in the kitchen brings back warm memories for sehun. but the smell in the air isn't of korean food and sehun laughs at himself.
he mouths lu han carefully, the first of many times, treasuring each syllable.
"do you have a home?" luhan asks, but he wonders if it's the right thing to ask after eating dinner over a movie.
"i think so," sehun replies and luhan stops holding his breath.
"well, you can stay here until you are sure." luhan squeezes sehun's hand and gets up to wash the dishes.
"why?" sehun bites his lower lip, never good with words. "um, why this…"
"kindness?" luhan finishes for sehun, "i don't know. i told my friend and he thought i was insane. i didn't really think about it when i saw you. there was something in me that just wanted to take care of you."
luhan looks back and sehun is behind him, playing with the hems of his shirt.
"plus, you looked familiar. i thought you were one of my customers."
sehun lowers his head onto luhan's shoulder, guilty. he can't bring himself to tell luhan about the countless times that he wanted to go into the café because the smell of freshly baked bread and cake was intoxicating, but didn't because it seemed like a place unfitting for a boy like him.
"i'll do housework in exchange for my stay." luhan hands him a plate.
sehun does more than housework. he picks luhan up from work so they can buy groceries together. sometimes they make trips to the bubble tea shop nearby because sehun doesn't like coffee and luhan gives in. sehun's body fits perfectly with luhan's on the bed and luhan gives up. sehun opens up and luhan notices the sadness only if he looks closely.
we are often reminded that good things come and go as fast as taking a breath. inhale we are holding hands and the temperature outside is just right for us to be pressed against each other. exhale we are left with the shells of memories and the ghosts of you and me lingering in the room.
which is why luhan tells himself he shouldn't be surprised that sehun hasn't come home in two days. sehun didn't have an obligation to come back, and he was the one who told sehun that he can stay until he's sure of home. so luhan thinks he'll be alright. he'll just go back to picking up trash and holding doors.
"喂喂喂! 鹿晗!" (hey hey hey! luhan!) a voice calls out and luhan turns with wide eyes. yixing points to the counter.
"咖啡都倒出来了. 你这几天怎么都无精打采的? 想失了魂似的." (you spilled the coffee. why have you been so listless these days? like you lost your soul.)
"没事, 就累了." (nothing, just tired.)
yixing wipes the coffee off the counter and takes the cup from luhan's hand. "被世勋折腾的?" (sehun's giving you trouble?)
luhan bitterly smiles.
luhan starts to think that rainy days are not as bad as yixing makes them out to be. sure clothes get wet and rooms get damp, but then there's sehun.
somehow, he's sitting in the same spot luhan originally found him in. but this time, sehun looks slightly different. sehun was afraid luhan would notice, so he buries his mouth into his arms even though he's already wearing a face mask.
"i got you a gift," sehun mumbles, extending his arm out. it's a small brown louis vuitton bag and luhan is confused. "i remember seeing your wallet and how worn-out it was…"
"where did you get the money?"
"i got a job." luhan doesn't believe it, but he has no choice.
there's something different about sehun ever since he has returned. sehun tries to hide it, but it stands out too much compared to happier days. he avoids meeting luhan's eyes when they talk and decides to sleep on the couch. he tells luhan, "i'm dirty." and luhan accepts even though he worries that he stepped into sehun's comfort zone when he asked sehun about the bruise on his lip.
"i'm just happy that you're back," luhan tells sehun, fixing the younger boy's bangs. "you need a trim."
sehun stares into luhan's glassy eyes and wonders if this is what forever feels like.
"it was lonely, sehun."
inhale. exhale. this time sehun disappears for more than two days. luhan worries and hope it starts raining soon.
like an unspoken promise between the weather and luhan, sehun appears on the next rainy day, and this time with bigger bags.
"i don't need these gifts," luhan says, not wanting to let go of sehun's hand when they step inside.
"but…"
"i just want you to stop disappearing."
when luhan finds sehun for the fifth time, he teaches sehun the word 回家. he tells sehun that hui jia means to return home and sehun wonders if that means it's ok to call luhan home.
when sehun picks luhan up, he hears luhan tell yixing 我跟世勋一起回家啦. "what does that mean?"
luhan grins, happy with sehun's curiousity. "yi qi means together. wo, " luhan points to himself, "and shi xun is your name. you know hui jia, so what do you think it means?"
sehun smiles into the back of luhan's hand, eyes curved like crescent moons.
after the seventh disappearance, luhan notices the bruises on sehun's abdomen when he steps out to get water. the night colored the apartment a heavy black, but luhan can still see blue and purple on sehun's pale skin, spread out like watercolor.
he feels wrong for lifting up sehun's shirt for further inspection, but he doesn't stop when he comes across what seems to be rope marks.
"your bruises," luhan says as he continues to spread jam on his toast the next morning. "did you get into a fight?"
sehun can't figure out whether luhan is too dense or fight is just an euphemism for what caused all the bruises.
luhan starts to notice more bruises and worries eat him up, especially when sehun flinches at his touch and hides away in the bathroom.
luhan becomes restless and resorts to consulting yixing. wufan overhears and tells luhan, "i've seen a tall and pale boy around the love hotel district. if you want, i can investigate for you?"
except luhan doesn't want anything else but sehun home.
and all he does is cry into sehun's shirt when he figures everything out and sees an empty apartment.
tired of forgetting how to breathe every time he opens his apartment door, luhan packs up the gifts into their original bags with a note and leaves them where he usually finds sehun. he takes another route home on rainy days and learns to live with loneliness.
inhale. exhale.
it's always on rainy days that feelings spill over and it seems inevitable to feel incredibly sad. luhan dislikes this combination.
he left his umbrella home today and let yixing leave early, so he's counting cash in the register twice to make sure. the bell rings, signaling a customer. "we're closed." but luhan doesn't hear another ring.
he looks up and believes that he'll like rainy days again.
"一起回家吧, 鹿晗."
---
thank you for reading. sorry if it's all over the place, wrote it from night to dawn so no beta.
inspired by quote above and this.
