where is the spring!?!?!

[kristjana]

ok, I'm done with the drinking & bars (unless for dancing) - I can't drink very much before I black out now, its very  strange & quite abrupt..I know the exact point after when it happens - I'm crazy, don't know what I want from life , cry alot & don't have my shit together :-( ...so the pixie man says (he thinks HE does, but he only read one book

Comments

[thisisjusttosay]

This might be REALLY mean, Kristy, but there are times I've been very worried about you when you've been drinking. I worry about somebody taking advantage of you.

However, I DO think you have your shit together. Crying does NOT for a fuck-up make! If you didn't have your shit together, would you exercise, or continue to see the doctor to try new meds, or be so interested in learning? No! Just because your "together" isn't the same as somebody else's opinion doesn't give him (or anybody) the right to judge you.

In regards to hangin' out with your friends -- do you feel comfortable drinking non-alcoholic drinks in bars? Sometimes I have self-imposed dry spells and during them I have myself a soda pop, or some cranberry juice, and I feel just fine!

[kristjana]

no, it's not mean at all. I wold be fine drinking 1 or 2 drinks but by then my judgement is out the window. It's pretty much if I have that first drink I'm going to have 10 - kinda shitty. I don't mind drinking non-alcoholic drinks in bars. I'm just scared of the temptation. :-S At least for now.

I'm just so tired & I want to forget everything. I know it will get better by the end of April but it's not so great now.