Failure rant
I keep straying from the grand prize of successfully reaching my goal weight and I go months without even logging onto my LJ. I'm still just out of reach of the goal of getting out of the 200's. I was 199.5 for a day but that was only because I was on a DXM binge for two weeks. I'm off of it now and am completely sober again... Which makes it harder to lose weight personally but I can't be a zombie 24/7. Plus I live in a small town and ppl notice when all you buy every other day is boxes of cold meds.
So going back to the drawing board... I don't know how ill get there since I can't just think of myself anymore, but I will lose this horrible extra person's worth of fat around my stomach. I just have to, I need to prove to myself that I have the will power and self control to do this. The voice inside my head won't stop screaming! I've lost almost 30 since may but its just not good enough.