Lover's in the dark (part 7)
Title: Lover’s in the Dark
Author: krystalkatz
Rating: NC17
Length: chaptered
Genre: Au,
Pairings: Matsumoto Jun/Ninomiya Kazunari, all of Arashi as brothers
Disclaimer: I only own the plot
Warnings: Incest,
A/N: Written for yumi_usagiwho kindly donated for thehelp_pilipinasauction xD
After breakfast Masaki dragged Kazu out to help out at the pet shop and Jun knew for certain that something was going on, his dad was called into the office and his mum who was looking after an elderly relative left soon after, Jun could tell that Sho and Satoshi kept trying to talk to him but their mouths kept opening with nothing coming out. Jun was almost tempted to yell at them to spit it out when he heard the sounds of Masaki’s van pulling into the drive. Jun smiled happily when he heard the door go and Masaki and Kazu came in, until he noticed there were shadows in Kazu’s eyes, “Kazu-nii?” He said quickly going to him “Is everything okay?” for the first time in a long time Kazu ignored him, walking past him and going upstairs a few minutes later he heard a bedroom door slam loudly “Masaki-nii, what did you do to Kazu-nii?”
“Nothing…” Masaki said but he looked troubled and kept looking at Sho and Satoshi and then gave a nod.
“What the hell’s going on?” Jun snapped looking at his brothers and Satoshi sighed looking at the clock as if working out how much time they had left, and then he grabbed Jun’s hand and pulled him down onto the sofa, and Masaki stood up going to stand beside Sho
“We know, about you and Kazu…” Satoshi said with a sigh,
“What do you mean?” Jun said able to hear his heart thudding in his ears,
“We know that you and he…” Satoshi stopped not knowing how to word it, and Masaki stepped forwards
“We know you’re fucking him” He said and Satoshi flinched while Jun’s mouth fell open
“H-how?” Jun asked not denying it and looking down at his hands instead of their faces, the room went completely silent all that could be heard was the sound of the clock and then Satoshi gave a shaky sigh
“So it’s true?”
“Yes”
“How long? How long have been doing that with him?”
“7 years” Jun whispered shuffling his feet,
“7?! 7 years?!” All three shouted and when he managed to look up he saw how white his brothers had become, “So even while you were living here… I feel sick…” Jun flinched dropping his gaze again this was the reaction he had been fearing, but at the same time it was what he had been hoping for, for seven long years he had lived with this secret, and it had been crushing at his soul and almost destroying him, and now they all knew. Satoshi seemed to recover the fastest, and crouched down looking into his face
“Jun you have to know this isn’t right, you’re brothers… And…”
“I know, I know it’s wrong… I know it’s gross, but I can’t stop… Kazu… He’s…How did you find out?” He asked looking into his older brother’s eyes and Satoshi gave another sigh, and Masaki and Sho seemed to take the cue from Satoshi and relaxed to, but Jun felt that it was just an act.
“There was a rumour even in school, it’s just Masaki and Sho didn’t let it get very far, at least not far enough to reach you and Kazu, we didn’t believe it then we just thought you were like the rest of us, over protective of Kazu… I guess that’s what we wanted to believe because the reality is just… But the other day Masaki saw Kazuko-chan…”
“Who?”
“She was in 3B, she was the one who threw Kazu’s signed book into the fountain” Masaki said quickly, and Jun nodded
“So what did she say?”
“She came into the shop and was being her normal self-important self, and then she asked about you and Kazu, I wasn’t really listening” Masaki shrugged “I just said that you weren’t living here anymore and she laughed and whispered in my ear ‘What would you do, if those rumours in school were true, that two of your brothers were having an affair?’ I tried to ignore her but she said that she had even seen you kissing”
“And you believed her?”
“No! But things were starting to play on my mind and I thought about things, you and Kazu were never really close, Nii-chan was always the only one who was allowed close to Kazu, but then… Suddenly it was you… Six years ago you were the one that helped Kazu through that bad patch” Masaki said and Jun looked at him surprised to see that there was disgust in his face, of all his brothers he would have expected Masaki to be the most understanding
“But there’s also… Other things, things that we should have picked up on…” Sho said softly “Like your change of personality, you were always a bright happy kid and then you flipped and became snappy and irritable…”
“What are you going to do? Do mum and dad know?”
“No, and we don’t think we should tell them, but you have to stop this, Jun…” Satoshi said, Jun opened his mouth to tell him to him to go to hell or maybe agree he wasn’t sure, when Kazu came flying down the stairs and hugging Jun tightly. Tears were rolling down his face and his body was shaking wildly, Jun started stroking his back whispering soothingly in his ear,
“It’s okay, Kazu, I’m here… I’m here…” he said and was reminded of six years ago.
6 years ago
It had been three days since the weekend and Kazu hadn’t spoken to anyone, if any of them tried to get him to talk he would rock almost wildly and if they tried to touch him he would hit out at them, including Jun. Satoshi, Sho and Aiba were worried, it had been a long time since they had seen him this worked up and Jun couldn’t remember seeing it, though he guessed that he must have at some point. After the second day Kazu had stopped sleeping sitting like a statue in front of the T.V his eyes glued to the screen.
“What happened this weekend?” Satoshi asked for what felt like the millionth time, Jun saw deep purple bruises on his cheek and arm, Sho had nail marks down his face and Aiba had some of his hair pulled out. Both their parents had tried and failed to get through to him too, their father had had his briefcase emptied and some of his paperwork torn into shreds. If he was honest this Kazu was almost scaring him, but Jun accepted it as another part of the Kazu that he loved
“Nothing everything was fine,” Jun answered watching Kazu through the kitchen door “It was fine until about half an hour until you came home…”
“What did you do together? Was there any stressor? Sho asked and Jun almost blushed when he thought about the things they had done, any or all of them could have stressed Kazu out enough to act like this, but Kazu had said that he liked it.
“We just played games” He lied and Satoshi and Sho sighed looking thoughtful. Jun chewed his lip and then went slowly into the living room ignoring Satoshi and Sho, going to sit close to Kazu who was sat on his knees rocking backwards and forwards “Kazu-nii” He started and the rocking quickened but other than that he made no sign that he had heard him, his eyes running over the screen his fingers almost a blur on the controller. Jun reached out to touch his shoulder, Kazu jumped the controller falling out of his hands, landing on the wooden floor with a crash. Jun flinched as his brother hit and kicked out at him, Jun heard Satoshi telling him to move away but instead Jun grabbed hold of him ignoring the hits to his chest and arms. He managed to get behind him and held his arms tightly wincing slightly as Kazu bit his arm “Kazu… Kazu…” said softly ignoring the pain in his arm and stroking Kazu’s hair while Kazu continued to struggle against him for a while, his teeth still cutting into his skin “Its okay, Kazu, I’m here… I’ll always be here” he whispered repeatedly until he felt tears hitting his arm and Kazu started to shake his teeth , he continued to whisper and hum in his ear rocking him backwards until the crying and shaking stopped and Kazu lay limp against him. When his breathing began to level out Jun realised he had fallen to sleep.
“Jun, are you alright?” Satoshi asked and Jun nodded picking Kazu up and carrying him up the stairs and into his bedroom. Laying him on his bed he stroked his face lightly, wishing he could kiss him when he heard Masaki come in
“Jun, is he sleeping?”
“Yeah” Jun answered pulling the quilt it over Kazu before turning to face Masaki, Masaki saw the bite on his arm and dragged him into the bathroom taking the first aid kit, he dabbed it lightly with a cleansing wipe before putting a plaster on it.
“Jun… Are you okay?” Masaki asked and Jun realised he was crying he tried to nod but seeing Kazu like that had been a bigger shock than he thought “I used to lock myself in the bedroom” Masaki whispered and Jun wiped his eyes staring at him. Masaki repacked the first aid box and give a smile, “When Kazu was little and he was really bad, I didn’t like seeing him like that so I locked myself in the bedroom… I was scared that if I saw him like that to much I wouldn’t ever be able to see him as my cute little brother again… But I guess that just made him worse he’s always so careful around us, to act like he’s the same, maybe if I was able to handle it like Nii-chan and Sho-chan and Jun does… Maybe he wouldn’t let it build up till he can’t handle it…Jun, was so good ne? But even when you were baby and Kazu was acting up if you were crying he would stop and look at you… Like magic…” Jun let the words sink in and then went into Kazu’s bedroom, Kazu was playing about with the wand he had been given from the Magician but stopped when he saw Jun. His cheeks flushed hotly and he looked down at his hands
“I’m… Sor-r-y…”
“What caused it?” Jun asked and Kazu stayed silent “Was it me? Was it this weekend?” Kazu shook his head and very slowly patted the bed beside him, Jun came to his side
“Doe-s… J hate me…” Kazu asked nervously and Jun shook his head quickly
“No, I could never hate, Kazu…” He said almost sharply.
“J, he coul-d have… any-on-e, he’s… so cute… So wh-y me?” Kazu whispered,
“Because I want you and only you” Jun told him softly and Kazu looked up at him before taking the arm he had bit.
“Ev-en tho-ugh…I di-d… Tha-t?” he asked running his fingers over the plaster, Jun nodded and kissed his forehead
“Kazu’s mine, he will always belong to me” Jun told him softly meaning every word, Kazu picked up the wand again
“I wis-h… I… Could do… Real magic… I would make… Myself bet-ter…”
“You can’t make yourself better Kazu, because you’re already perfect” Jun whispered and Kazu gave a shy smile and nestled against his chest
“Whe-n… W-e mo-v-e I’l-l ge-t bet-t-er I… Prom-ise…” He said “Whe-n it’s… Yo-u… And m-e” and somehow Jun believed him
TBC
A/N: I sort of down played it a bit in this but sometimesthose with Asperger’s can get a little like Kazu did, and it can be scary to witness >.< I hope you’re enjoying the fic ^.^