Who we are and who we used to be
Third Chapter - Who we are and who we used to be
They were acting professional in front of the camera, responding to the photographers’ demands; smiling when asked to, turning left, turning right.
And still when Himchan was ordered to step closer to the maknae to get a better frame, Yong Guks body tensed and his eyes wouldn’t leave them unless he had to face back towards the camera.
He wanted to yank him away from Zelo.
The urge to pull those two apart was so intense he clenched his hands into fists to keep himself from acting on instinct.
The camera flashed with a loud shutter noise.
“Alright thank you so far. We’ll be taking single shoots now starting with Yong Guk.”
The group dissolved into different directions.
Daehyung walked off to hide behind his I-Pad once again, Youngjae and Jongup heading towards the little fruit and beverage buffet.
The photographer was changing the camera lens and Yong Guks took the moment to let his eyes trace the other two members.
Himchan was walking behind Zelo, his hand moving upwards till his fingertips brushed the others neck.
Zelo flinched but Himchans hand remained on his neck, squeezing him a little.
A lump formed in Yong Guks throat, his mouth went dry and he had troubles keeping himself from rushing over to separate them.
Himchans hand dropped down to Zelos waist, his fingers sliding underneath the fabric to stroke his lower back.
Zelos body tensed and he arched his back to get rid of the hand caressing him like it caused him pain.
The maknaes head turned around to see if anyone noticed, his eyes widened when he found Yong Guk looking at them.
His face lost all color and he looked sick for a second.
Youngjae entered the scene and blocked the leaders view, holding out an apple slice to Zelos mouth and Zelos face regained its color as Himchan removed his hand.
Himchan stepped back from the maknae and threw Yong Guk a knowing glance.
He did it on purpose, Yong Guk was certain he did.
It seemed like hours until he was released from the shoot.
Zelo was next and Yong Guk felt grateful for that, at least he would be out of Himchans reach for a little while.
They had their picture taken one after the other.
Daehyun had left him with his I-Pad when it was his turn but Yong Guk was too busy eyeing Himchans every move to even focus on the movie that was playing on the small screen.
And it wasn’t long till the other members started to notice the tension between them.
Youngjae kept looking from one to the other, a confused expression on his face.
Himchan and he had stuck together so often before it had been almost natural for them to be together.
Whenever they were shooting and had a break Himchan and he would sit together and talk and joke and laugh.
Not anymore though.
It was probably weird for the others to see them being distant.
He wondered when his relationship with Himchan had changed.
When had it been that Himchan had stopped hanging around him or had it been him who had stopped seeking the others presence?
He couldn’t remember, all he knew was that they had changed.
One of these days they’d stopped talking.
They wouldn’t watch movies anymore, wouldn’t talk for hours like they used to.
Their time together had certainly decreased a while back already especially since Himchan had left every time Zelo had clung to him.
But even after there was this obvious distance between him and the maknae Himchan hadn’t approached him again.
And now Himchan showed that side to him that Yong Guk couldn’t recognize, that was so far from the person who was his friend.
He wasn’t surprised when Jongup walked up to him with a worried expression on his face and placed his hand onto his shoulder.
“Hyung is everything alright?” He asked a concerned tone in his voice.
Yong Guk snapped out of his trance.
He tried to pull himself together and nodded, trying to look convincing.
“Yah I’m all good.” his words didn’t come out as strong as he wanted them to.
Jongup frowned a little not able to believe his leader.
His eyes went to focus on the floor; he seemed to be thinking hard about his next words.
“Are you and Himchan fighting?” The question hit Yong Guk hard, and he gulped down the lump that had formed in his throat.
He looked at Jongup who was obviously very worried about his bandmates.
“No not at all we just had a little disagreement.” He stressed the last word as if to convince himself that was all there was to it.
His lips formed into his bright big gum smile, it felt weird to smile like that now but he did for Jongup, to assure him everything was fine.
The younger nodded, a slight caring expression still lingering on his face.
“It’s a wrap!” He heard the photographer yell through the small studio.
The boys bowed to the crew politely.
Yong Guks eyes searched the room for Zelo.
He spotted him standing with Youngjae, both of them bowing to the make-up lady.
The older laughed and pushed Zelos head a little lower.
A joke he’d pulled since the Tada episode where he’d explained to Zelo what respect was.
The younger laughed cheerfully and slapped Youngjaes hand off his head, he turned him around to hold him in a headlock, messing up his hair.
Both of them kept laughing hilariously.
Yong Guk wanted to vanish on the spot.
They were acting professional in front of the camera, responding to the photographers’ demands; smiling when asked to, turning left, turning right.
And still when Himchan was ordered to step closer to the maknae to get a better frame, Yong Guks body tensed and his eyes wouldn’t leave them unless he had to face back towards the camera.
He wanted to yank him away from Zelo.
The urge to pull those two apart was so intense he clenched his hands into fists to keep himself from acting on instinct.
The camera flashed with a loud shutter noise.
“Alright thank you so far. We’ll be taking single shoots now starting with Yong Guk.”
The group dissolved into different directions.
Daehyung walked off to hide behind his I-Pad once again, Youngjae and Jongup heading towards the little fruit and beverage buffet.
The photographer was changing the camera lens and Yong Guks took the moment to let his eyes trace the other two members.
Himchan was walking behind Zelo, his hand moving upwards till his fingertips brushed the others neck.
Zelo flinched but Himchans hand remained on his neck, squeezing him a little.
A lump formed in Yong Guks throat, his mouth went dry and he had troubles keeping himself from rushing over to separate them.
Himchans hand dropped down to Zelos waist, his fingers sliding underneath the fabric to stroke his lower back.
Zelos body tensed and he arched his back to get rid of the hand caressing him like it caused him pain.
The maknaes head turned around to see if anyone noticed, his eyes widened when he found Yong Guk looking at them.
His face lost all color and he looked sick for a second.
Youngjae entered the scene and blocked the leaders view, holding out an apple slice to Zelos mouth and Zelos face regained its color as Himchan removed his hand.
Himchan stepped back from the maknae and threw Yong Guk a knowing glance.
He did it on purpose, Yong Guk was certain he did.
It seemed like hours until he was released from the shoot.
Zelo was next and Yong Guk felt grateful for that, at least he would be out of Himchans reach for a little while.
They had their picture taken one after the other.
Daehyun had left him with his I-Pad when it was his turn but Yong Guk was too busy eyeing Himchans every move to even focus on the movie that was playing on the small screen.
And it wasn’t long till the other members started to notice the tension between them.
Youngjae kept looking from one to the other, a confused expression on his face.
Himchan and he had stuck together so often before it had been almost natural for them to be together.
Whenever they were shooting and had a break Himchan and he would sit together and talk and joke and laugh.
Not anymore though.
It was probably weird for the others to see them being distant.
He wondered when his relationship with Himchan had changed.
When had it been that Himchan had stopped hanging around him or had it been him who had stopped seeking the others presence?
He couldn’t remember, all he knew was that they had changed.
One of these days they’d stopped talking.
They wouldn’t watch movies anymore, wouldn’t talk for hours like they used to.
Their time together had certainly decreased a while back already especially since Himchan had left every time Zelo had clung to him.
But even after there was this obvious distance between him and the maknae Himchan hadn’t approached him again.
And now Himchan showed that side to him that Yong Guk couldn’t recognize, that was so far from the person who was his friend.
He wasn’t surprised when Jongup walked up to him with a worried expression on his face and placed his hand onto his shoulder.
“Hyung is everything alright?” He asked a concerned tone in his voice.
Yong Guk snapped out of his trance.
He tried to pull himself together and nodded, trying to look convincing.
“Yah I’m all good.” his words didn’t come out as strong as he wanted them to.
Jongup frowned a little not able to believe his leader.
His eyes went to focus on the floor; he seemed to be thinking hard about his next words.
“Are you and Himchan fighting?” The question hit Yong Guk hard, and he gulped down the lump that had formed in his throat.
He looked at Jongup who was obviously very worried about his bandmates.
“No not at all we just had a little disagreement.” He stressed the last word as if to convince himself that was all there was to it.
His lips formed into his bright big gum smile, it felt weird to smile like that now but he did for Jongup, to assure him everything was fine.
The younger nodded, a slight caring expression still lingering on his face.
“It’s a wrap!” He heard the photographer yell through the small studio.
The boys bowed to the crew politely.
Yong Guks eyes searched the room for Zelo.
He spotted him standing with Youngjae, both of them bowing to the make-up lady.
The older laughed and pushed Zelos head a little lower.
A joke he’d pulled since the Tada episode where he’d explained to Zelo what respect was.
The younger laughed cheerfully and slapped Youngjaes hand off his head, he turned him around to hold him in a headlock, messing up his hair.
Both of them kept laughing hilariously.
Yong Guk wanted to vanish on the spot.