Three Letters Away From Your Heart
Three Letters Away From Your Heart; Sunggyu/Woohyun; PG
A story about how Woohyun delivers letters (and his heart) to a boy. A love story ensues.
A/N: Okay this hit me in the face yesterday. I was bathing and all of a sudden, I have a story. This wasn’t how I expected it to turn out, but nonetheless, I’m still satisfied with it. HAHA.
Tell me what you think, if you would, as your comments would be deeply appreciated. It’s my first time writing an Infinite fic anyway. :3
Do excuse any grammar or tense mistakes. My brain is fried ARGH. /rage mode on/
MY HTML FAILED JUST NOW. HOPE ITS WORKING WELL NOW.
Woohyun eyed the road in front of him. It was going to be tough, judging by how it was all uphill and how he only had his bicycle with him. He stared at the envelope in his bag. It’s the first time I’ve seen it, he mused to himself. He had been working as a postman in his hometown ever since he turned 18. He was 21 now. It became a routine for him, to check the mailbox at the road right at the end of the village once every week, because that’s where the truck drops the letters, and collect them all before delivering these letters to the recipients. Most of them are from family members working in Seoul, trying their very best to earn a decent living to make sure their children survive in the village, to make sure their parents are still healthy and happy.
Nobody appointed Woohyun to be the postman of the village, it just sort of happened, judging by how he was one of the few able-bodied teenagers around. And he had a bike. Having a bike sort of confirmed everything, because that would make delivering letters way more convenient. Not that Woohyun minded, because seeing the smile on HwaJung’s face whenever her appa wrote back, or the relief in Mdm Lee’s eyes whenever her son replied her, was more than enough to keep him going. It was always the same few though, the same few who wrote letters, the same few who received replies back. Woohyun eventually got used to the route he would take every week, starting from old ahjumma Jung’s house and ending at little HwaJung’s house around the corner and a few lampposts down.
This, however, spoiled his usual route. It was assigned to the house further down the road, and a little out of the way for Woohyun’s liking, seeing how he will have to get back a little later than usual because of the hill he had to ride up. He flipped the envelope around in his hands. It was a tattered brown envelope, with the address written right in the middle, and a tiny To Sunggyu right below it.
--
Woohyun was panting by the time he reached the house. He was certain he had never seen this house before. It was old with a rusty roof and leaking pipes. He stared at it for a while more before knocking lightly on the gate. There was slight rustling in the house before a soft Who’s that can be heard.
“It’s the postman. I have a letter for you.” Woohyun felt awkward talking to someone he couldn’t see, so he craned his neck a little to look for the owner of the house.
“Oh. Would you mind coming in? The door is unlocked.”
Now that was new. Woohyun always passed the letters to the villagers through their gates, chatted with them for a while before leaving for the next house. He hesitated for a while, before pushing lightly at the gate. It creaked loudly, echoing throughout the silence that seemed to engulf the entire house and its surroundings. Woohyun scanned the surroundings before walking towards the door and poking his head in. The house was dark, with only sunlight streaming in through the dusty window pane and the creak on the roof.
He shifted around awkwardly before clearing his throat. “Um.”
“Oh. I’m here.” Woohyun jumped slightly at the voice before turning around to find a boy, around his age, sitting on a chair with a smile on his face. “Would you mind coming over here, because I kind of can’t see where you are.”
It was then Woohyun noticed the stick lying on the table beside him, and he nodded, noticing belatedly that the other boy probably could not see him. He approached the other softly, afraid of startling him, before kneeling right in front of him. “Uh, you have a letter.”
The smile on the boy’s face widened, and he nodded, before reaching out his hand blindly in front of him. Woohyun placed the letter gently in the boy’s hands, and watched as the other clutch onto it with both hands, before his fingers started tracing the outline of the envelope.
“Would you mind reading it out for me?”
Woohyun accepted the letter from the boy’s outstretched hands, and tore off the edges of the envelope, unfolding a white flimsy paper.
My dear grandson Sunggyu,
How is life back at home? Are you used to living alone yet? I hope you don’t blame Grandma for not being able to spend time with you. I know it is tough on you, my poor boy, having to take care of yourself when you cannot even see the world outside. Life hasn’t been fair to you, and I am sorry for not being able to provide you with a good life. Life here in Seoul is tough, seeing how high the living expenses are, but the pay is good and I am glad to be able to earn a decent living to provide for you back at home. But Grandma’s health is deteriorating, and I’m afraid I won’t be able to pull through. I hope this letter reaches you well, and that I still have enough time to read your reply. In case I don’t make it, here is all the money I have, Sunggyu-ah. Please live well on your own, I know you will. I’m sorry I cannot say a proper goodbye to you, and that my first letter to you would most probably turn out to be my last. Grandma really tried, Sunggyu-ah. Take care, my dearest grandson, and Grandma will watch over you in Heaven.
Woohyun found it hard to breathe all of a sudden. He looked up to find Sunggyu with anticipation etched in his features, as if he had been waiting for this letter since forever.
“Uh, it’s from your grandmother.”
A smile, and a nod.
“She wrote to tell you to take care of yourself while she is away, and that the pay in Seoul is decent and she is happy to be able to provide for you.”
Woohyun watched the smile falter, before the edges started to tremble and tears slowly started to form in the other’s unmoving eyes. “Is there anything else she said?”
Woohyun looked down at the letter, then at the boy in front of him. He hesitated a moment, before folding the letter and biting down on his lips.
“Nope, she ended off by telling you not to worry and that she’s healthy and happy there. And she left a sum of money for you.”
There was no way I can tell him that he had lost his grandma, Woohyun thought as he returned the letter to the boy in front of him. Besides, the blinding smile that the other shot him proved that he had made a right decision.
--
Woohyun found himself knocking on the rusty old gate again the next week. He toyed with the envelope in his hands, slightly crumpling the letter. A soft Come in came from inside the house, and he pushed the gate slightly, noticing how weeds were growing at the sides of the front door. He found Sunggyu sitting at the exact same spot as the last time he came, same dazzling smile on his face, same anticipation lining his features. Woohyun tried hard to swallow the guilt making him nauseous.
“Did my grandma write back to me?”
Woohyun watched Sunggyu play with his fingers, a sign that the other boy was nervous. He watched as the other bit his lips while waiting for a reply. “Uh, yes, yes she did.” Woohyun unfolded the letter in his hands before staring down at the blank piece of paper. “Um, she said that she is doing fine there in Seoul, although she feels a little tired at times. She, um, asked if you are eating well.” He paused to watch the other’s reactions. Sunggyu only nodded and urged him to continue. “And well, she ended off with telling you to be healthy and uh, she’s sorry for not being able to accompany you.”
Sunggyu nodded and reached out his hand, fingers grabbing at nothing. Woohyun placed the letter in his hands, and watched as the other fingered the corners, a slight furrow in his eyebrow, before smiling and placing the letter in his pocket.
“I guess I haven’t introduced myself formally. I’m Sunggyu.”
Woohyun gently took the hand that Sunggyu stuck out. “I’m Woohyun. I work as the village postman. Because I have a bike.” He ended off lamely, scratching his head with his other free hand. Sunggyu chuckled a little, giving Woohyun’s hand a final firm shake before letting go. “Nice to meet you.”
Woohyun stared at the smile the other shot him. It had to be the brightest and prettiest smile Woohyun had ever seen in his whole life. He wondered how someone who had such an unfair life was able to smile that prettily. “Nice to meet you too.”
--
Woohyun was officially friends with Sunggyu. He flipped around on his bed as he replayed the conversation he had with the other earlier that day. He learned that Sunggyu was actually his hyung, that he was 23 this year, that both his parents had abandoned him when he turned blind at the age of seven. He found out that Sunggyu wasn’t blind from birth, and that if he had not climbed up a tree to save a trapped kitten, he would not have fallen down from the branch because he slipped, he would still have his parents taking care of him, he would still have a happy family. Sunggyu told him that his grandmother had been the one taking care of him ever since, and Woohyun watched as the older boy looked up wistfully, fingers interlocked, jaw tight.
Woohyun wondered if he had made a right choice by lying to the other, but he just could not find it in himself to tell him the truth, especially not now, since he heard about how tough life is for Sunggyu. He found himself respecting the other boy so much, because despite how shitty his life was, Sunggyu was cheerful and sensible, even though he was a little shy and awkward to be around at first.
Woohyun shut his eyes, trying to drown out his thoughts, but all he could hear was Sunggyu’s last words before he left. My grandmother is the only person I have left. Nobody else cares about me that much.
Woohyun opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. He finds himself unable to sleep for the rest of the night.
--
There has to be a reason to this. There must be an explanation as to why Woohyun was loitering outside Sunggyu’s house again the next day. I’m just worried for him, he’s blind and alone after all. Woohyun reasoned, no matter how weak that excuse sounded. He pushed the gate lightly, the creaks signalling his arrival. He walked in to find Sunggyu asleep on the same chair. It seemed as if the other boy never moved. He shifted silently to settle down on the chair next to him, and he found himself staring at Sunggyu’s sleeping form. The other boy looked so tiny and fragile as he slept, a small smile forming on his lips and tiny snores escaping. He seemed so carefree, and Woohyun smiled at that.
Sunggyu always seemed to be worrying about something, even though he tries to hide it with a smile. The tiny furrow of his eyebrow, the slight downturn of his lips never escaped Woohyun’s eyes, not that Woohyun stares at him a lot, it was just obvious to him. He sighed as he looked out of the window, and he found himself thinking about his parents at home, his older brother who takes care of him, and how they had fussed over him when he fell off the bike two years ago. He had been crying even at the age of sixteen, because it had hurt, blood trickling down his skin and sand sticking to his wound.
Then he turned to Sunggyu, and remembered how the other had fallen from the tree, how no one was there to comfort him, how his fall only caused his parents to leave him. Woohyun’s heart clenched at that, and he found himself wanting so much to protect the older boy from everything else that could hurt him, anything that could dim his brilliant smile. It was then Woohyun realised how he could have fallen for the older boy at their third meeting, or even at that moment when Woohyun stepped in to deliver his letter eight days ago.
--
There was a new routine for Woohyun. He would wake up every Monday, collect the letters from the letterbox at the end of the village, deliver them to the waiting villagers, then end his day by going to Sunggyu’s house and reciting words off a blank piece of paper. The other days, he would pop by Sunggyu’s house to talk and make him laugh. Woohyun realized Sunggyu tend to laugh without restraint at something funny he said, his mouth wide with his hand as a cover, as he rocked back and forth, body vibrating with laughter. Woohyun liked, loved, how close they have become throughout the span of four weeks.
He finds himself hypnotised by the older’s laughter at times, no matter how cliché that sounded, and when he snaps out of it he would find Sunggyu cocking his head, a confused look on his face with a small smile hanging on his lips. Woohyun wanted to know how it would feel like meeting those lips with his own, then as if he was embarrassed by that thought, he shakes his head, thankful that Sunggyu is not able to catch him staring. Every single day, Woohyun finds himself falling a little more in love, and every single day, he finds himself wondering if the other boy feels the same.
--
It was a Monday again, so it explains why Woohyun is pushing lightly at Sunggyu’s gate, why he enters and finds Sunggyu sitting at the exact same spot. But it doesn’t explain why Sunggyu seems more worried than ever, the usual smile on his face now a frown that seems to bring the entire atmosphere down.
“Sunggyu?” Woohyun whispers, afraid of the sudden change in Sunggyu.
“Oh.” Sunggyu turns to face the direction of the voice, mouth forming a small O, before he smiles and motions for Woohyun to sit down. Woohyun relaxes a little, glad that Sunggyu is not unhappy with him, and settles down in front of the other.
“Ready for your letter?”
Woohyun watch as the other’s smile falters a little, his brows furrowed in concentration, before he nods and settles his hands on his laps.
“Alright, so your grandmother said that she hopes you are as healthy as ever, and that she has made a new friend in Seoul and that she is happy because at least now she has company. And-“
“Woohyun?” Sunggyu’s tiny voice stopped Woohyun in the midst of reciting words off his mind, and the older placed a warm palm over his own, making Woohyun’s heart skip a beat. Or two, or three.
“You can stop now.” His tone wasn’t harsh, but Woohyun felt like he had just been slapped in the face.
“But, I have not finished, and-“
“I don’t mean this letter. I meant every other letter that you are going to deliver from now on.”
“W-Why?”
“Woohyun,” Sunggyu gave the other a sad sad smile. “I know everything. Not exactly everything, but I know.”
Woohyun stares at the other, letter now lying unforgotten on the floor, as he takes Sunggyu’s hand in both of his own. “I-I’m sorry.”
Sunggyu only shakes his head, tears welling in his unseeing eyes, as he smiles and smiles because smiling is the only thing he can do. “I understand, but you can stop now. I appreciate it.”
Woohyun nodded once, twice, before scooting closer and wrapping his arms around the older boy, feeling the other shake in his arms, watching as Sunggyu’s tears seep into his clothes, and Woohyun knew this is the moment where Sunggyu is the most fragile and vulnerable, and it was then Woohyun promised himself he would never leave the other’s side, because Sunggyu had to deal with too many departures, and that he would take care of him, because his parents never did.
--
“Sunggyu-ah, do you want to go out?” It had been two weeks since Sunggyu fell apart, broken in Woohyun’s arms, and ever since then, Woohyun never saw the other drop a single tear again. It only made him want to protect the older boy even more, and he smiled as the other tilted his head with an amused smile grazing his lips.
“I can’t, Woohyun. I can’t see where I’m walking, I can’t see where to go.”
“You have me.”
Sunggyu set his lips into a thin line, and Woohyun watched as his eyebrows furrow in concentration again. He grabbed Sunggyu’s hands before he could protest, and led him out of the house slowly. “Besides, who said anything about walking?”
--
Woohyun was goddamn proud of himself. He turned his head slightly to see Sunggyu bite his lips nervously as he climbed onto the back seat of the bicycle and latch himself onto Woohyun.
“Ready?”
Sunggyu nodded hesitantly before smiling uncertainly at Woohyun.
“Sunggyu-ah, trust me.” Woohyun wrapped his free hand around Sunggyu’s, smiling at how excited yet nervous the older boy seemed. And when Woohyun felt the other nod, he swore he could feel Sunggyu’s heart beat as fast as his own did.
--
It wasn’t on purpose when Woohyun blurted it out. He had planned an elaborate confession session which consisted of him kneeling in front of Sunggyu and telling the other how much he loved it when the older boy laughed at his jokes, or when the other would smack him on the head whenever he teased him about the bicycle ride (Sunggyu had screamed and hung onto Woohyun’s waist for dear life when the other pedalled downhill). So you can imagine both their shock when Woohyun confessed while he was wiping Sunggyu’s windows, the older boy sitting on the chair by the window. There was silence for a good while, before Woohyun’s mind registered what had happened and it came to him that it was time to do some damage control.
“Um.” Okay, that wasn’t the wisest thing to say, but Woohyun’s brain seemed determined to malfunction right after his accidental confession. He watched as Sunggyu tensed then relaxed, and he found himself anticipating the other boy’s reply.
“Woohyun-ah,” Sunggyu sounded tired. Tired means no good. “I, I don’t think you should say that.”
Woohyun let out the breath he didn’t realise he was holding, and frowned. “Why not? I meant what I said. I mean, I didn’t want it to come out like, like this.” He waved his free arm around, the one without the rag, to emphasize his point. “But still, I mean it.”
“I don’t want you to mean it, Woohyun.”
“Why not.” Woohyun might have sounded more indignant than he felt, but he reasoned that he could not blame himself, because he was on the verge of being rejected by the only boy he have loved so much in his whole life.
“Because.”
“Because what?! Damn it Sunggyu, you can’t just say that and expect me to understand.”
“Because I can’t see you, and I never will.”
Woohyun didn’t know where this sudden low self-esteem came from, but he was too frustrated at this point to care. “You seriously think I care? If I did, I would have left on the day I found out you were blind, Sunggyu. I wouldn’t have brought you on a ride, I wouldn’t come over everyday just to talk to you and make sure that you were alright. I wouldn’t give two shit about you if I didn’t care, don’t you understand?”
“I don’t understand, and I don’t want to.” Woohyun gave out a grunt, which Sunggyu ignored. “Woohyun, you deserve better.”
“I know what I want, Sunggyu. And I want you. I don’t care if you think I deserve better, I just want to know how you feel.”
“It shouldn’t matter,” Sunggyu shook his head, a sad smile on his face. “How I feel.”
“Why won’t you understand?!” Woohyun was this close to punching the window, because damn it, why should Sunggyu care about his own flaws if Woohyun doesn’t?
“Woohyun-ah,” Sunggyu tried again.
“Sunggyu, if this is your way of rejection, then fine I understand.”
The silence that followed the slam of Sunggyu’s door had never been so loud before.
--
Woohyun rolled around on his bed. It had been three days since he confessed, and all he had done since then was turn into a rolling pin and smoothen out the crease on his bed, only to crumple it again. I’m a self-destructive rolling pin, Woohyun mused, before a knock could be heard on his door. Woohyun looked up to see his mother poke her head in, concern etched in her features as she calls him down for breakfast. It might be because of the worry lining his mother’s face, but Woohyun finds himself agreeing to eat breakfast for the first time in three days.
--
After breakfast, Woohyun jumped back into bed, only to crawl out again five minutes later because today was Monday, and Monday meant delivery day. He contemplated skipping today, but withdrew that idea when he realised the villagers were probably waiting anxiously for the replies from their family. With a groan, he shuffled down the stairs and grabbed his delivery bag before cycling down the road to the familiar letterbox.
--
It was only noon when he finished his delivery, and he remembered how he always went to Sunggyu’s house after his duty. Sunggyu. Woohyun sighed as he eyed the hill in front of him. I guess it wouldn’t hurt if I went to check on him.
He stopped outside the gate, knowing well that if he pushed the gate, Sunggyu would know of his arrival. It seemed that Sunggyu did not have any other visitors, now that Woohyun thought about it. How lonely he must be. With that thought, Woohyun gently poked the gate, to which it creaked loudly before it opened. He stepped inside the house silently, surprised to see that Sunggyu was not at his usual seat. He felt himself starting to panic as he combed the entire house but there was no sign of Sunggyu. Where could he go, he can’t see anything.
A slight shuffle at the back of the house disrupted the silence, and Woohyun rushed out in hope of finding the older boy. Sure enough, the familiar brown tuft of hair could be seen behind a cabinet, and Woohyun didn’t think twice before rushing forward and hugging the other boy, amazed at how the older boy was able to make him this worried.
“W-Woohyun, is that you?” Woohyun could hear the fear in Sunggyu’s voice, and he nodded, feeling the other relaxing in his arms.
“You don’t know how worried you made me.”
“I-I’m sorry? I was at the back trying to clean out this cabinet, since I thought I will have to do it sooner or later.”
Woohyun only nodded, thankful that the older boy didn’t leave.
“Woohyun?” Sunggyu tugged lightly on Woohyun’s sleeve. “Are you going to leave me again?”
Woohyun looked down to see the uncertainty and fear on the other’s face, and he smiled. “No, I’m not.”
“Please don’t. You are the only one I have left. Please don’t leave me as well.”
Woohyun hated how he didn’t think about the fear Sunggyu faced when he had left like that three days ago, and he nodded, taking in a deep breath and talking around a tuft of Sunggyu’s hair. “I won’t.”
He could feel Sunggyu smile, then the other boy pulled back to reach for Woohyun’s hand. Woohyun held onto his hand, and Sunggyu took in a deep breath before looking at where he thought Woohyun’s face is. “Can you give me time? To, to think about what you said? I didn’t want to agree because I would afraid something might go wrong between us, then you would leave, then I would be left all alone again.”
Woohyun looked at how fragile the older boy seemed at that moment, and nodded, realising how Sunggyu’s answer actually made no difference to him, because no matter what the other’s reply was, Woohyun knew he was stuck with him forever. The boy who had lost everything but gave Woohyun so much more than what he could have asked for.
FIN.