Lies I'll Tell My Children

[kylelong]

In no particular order:

• that they're of Dutch extraction, as I've learned the Dutch are simply the most amazing Europeans.
• that there's a time and a place for drugs and that continuum is college (parastolen from Emily).
• that I was a virgin until I was 21 (this is mostly as an amusment for myself).
• that carrots are candy and cucumbers are cookies (

Comments

[naturalstate]

During their teen years: don't worry, it gets easier.
During their twentysomething years: don't worry, it gets easier.
What I'm telling myself now: don't worry, it'll get easier.

Also, no one will ever love you if you don't have proper grooming habits. God, I wish that were true, and the stank of the world would decrease considerably in our lifetime.

Also, there must be a posse reunion party come fall.