(no subject)
First of all,
Second of all, and much more importantly,
Happy Birthday, mina!!
Happy Birthday, Jonny!!
Love you both... Have presents to send both of you... Have been very bad about getting to the post office. ^^;; Sorriez!!
And third, I need to vent... So here goes...
Sorry to everybody to whom I have not been what I should be lately. You know who you are.
Lately I've been kinda emo... Lame, huh?
See, I'm starting to have problems with living in the dorms. It was a long time coming. I am an only child and it's getting hard for me to be around people 24/7. At home, I'm used to having my own personal space and time by myself to sit around, think, whatever. And I'm used to being able to get up and go for a drive when I really need to get away. Here, there is always someone in my room, knocking on my door, outside of my room, screaming, running around. It's good that so many of my dorm mates, and my suite mates especially, are enjoying the dorm life. It is definately a once in a lifetime experience... But I really need my alone time, and I'm not getting it. There isn't anywhere I can go... I can't drive... And I never get any quiet time. It's getting hard. I miss home. You know how people always say there's a difference between a house and a home? It's really true. Yea, I have all my junk in my room... My photos, my clothes, my blankets... But my room isn't a warm, cozy, familiar place. The furniture is so impersonal... Everyone's room is more or less the same. It isn't homey and it isn't comfortable. Unfortunately for me, I don't know anybody here whose house I can go visit. I can't go home. So, yea. Basically, I just feel like staying in my room and doing nothing all day. I need my personal time, and I'm not getting it, but I keep trying because I don't know what else to do. So, yea. I leave my phone on silent... Sorry to anyone who tries to call me. I'm not looking at my phone saying "Look, _______ called. I won't answer." I just don't know when my phone rings. I need to learn how to take care of myself before I can try to help anybody else. I apologize for this because being a friend means you should be there to listen when your friends have problems and to be there to support them and encourage them... But right now, I really just need to take care of myself. It is taking everything I have just to get up and make myself drag my sorry ass to class. So, once this passes, I'll be back to my gossipy self. For now, forgive me, I just need some time.
And now I have to go... Class 'til 7.