a little vice keeps a person sane, i think. this weekend has been a weekend of charitable works, feats of strength, and spiritual enrichment. i even scoured my bathroom sink. i haven't lashed out in anger at anyone in the past 24 hours (unless you count "WHERE'S MY COFFEE MAKER??? NOOOOOOOOOO!" but i wasn't angry, just concerned). but i haven't ( Read more... )

my tuition for this semester is $47.00 dollars.
my books for this semester are $447.00.
is this funny? i can't tell.

before my boss remarks "you're looking a little pale", i wish she'd remember i don't have a window in my office and that eight hours a day spent staring at accounting software and various web pages does nothing for a person's jaundice. is it a compliment when you suggest you have jaundice, and a person responds with "i never thought i would like it ( Read more... )

my dream life is slowly fading into reality. having one of the most fantastic winter holidays on record has certainly contributed to my reluctance to face the facts, clean my shower, generally get down to business. the length of time i've been chipping away at this degree has certainly compromised a bit of my enthusiasm, but i really believe i'm ( Read more... )

certainly is has been said i haven't the slightest idea of how to appropriately drunk dial anyone. perhaps true drunk dialing involves embarassing emotional confessions, declarations of undying affection or is even a bit sexually explicit. sorry for deviating from the norm. if i drunk dialed you from out of my calling area mumbling unintelligibly ( Read more... )

in theory, i would really enjoy spending the remainder of the afternoon delighting in a makeout. however, if actually confronted with the situation i would likely decline in a manner similar to declining hallucinogens- with nostalgia, disbelief, maybe a little uncomfortable laughter, definitely a lot of shame, some reminiscence and probably ( Read more... )

in other news, i hate experimental facial hair. or maybe it's creative facial hair. i'm strictly beard and/or mustache. no exceptions.

i've often said, perhaps only to the end of furthering claims that i'm incorrigibly type A, that everyone should just do what they're supposed to do. that's complete bullshit, of course, on several levels. it contradicts my unwillingness to make even the slightest obligatory measure, and i can in no way expect adherence to obviously subjective, ( Read more... )

all juiced up and nowhere to go...story of my life.

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