dorky forky porky corky torky sporky
youre not fat
you just live in the wrong country
most of you know about my parents outrageous reaction to my tongue ring. it all pretty much narrowed down to how they failed me, i'm fucked up and they don't know who i am anymore. that was mostly my mom though, she likes to blow things out of proportion.. but she was cool about it when i first showed her, and again after she said all that. also apparently going to a frat (even though i didn't drink) was a terrible idea, and i am an awful, untrustworthy child. i honestly have no idea what makes them think all of this. i have never lead them to believe that i am like that ever. i have done nothing but show them the utmost respect, love and devotion my entire life. i barely ever broke the rules, and when i did i was seriously reprimanded for it (kind of like now). i have ALWAYS put my family first, and this is the first time i have ever done something for myself, and i really wanna keep it that way. i think they are having a hard time adjusting to that. i don't know the onset of all of this, all of it really boggles my mind they always encouraged me to go out and experience the college life, experience freedom. they were excited when i came home on my dad's birthday, half drunk, severely hung over with slight alcohol poisoning. they were excited i finally got it out of my system. i just dont understand. my dad also doesn't want me visiting my family in Pennsylvania because i have a tongue ring.. he's fucking stupid. he already bought the plane ticket and is willing to waste the money if it means i dont go. I really wanna keep this tongue ring, I like it, everyone else likes it, but I really want to please my parents and make them proud of me again and take it out…. Then it dawned on me: told my parents to fuck off because if a piece of jewelry makes me unbearable to be seen with, or unable to love, then they aren't worth it.. so in the end they asked me to move out. my brother offered for me to stay at his place, rawson offered to let me sleep in one of his boats lol.. i know i have plenty of places to go, and i told my dad it wasn't that hard and when i told him i found a place to live, he said "don't forget who controls all of your money" yes that's right, the $34,000 i saved for school, the $3200 i saved for a car, both of my savings accounts and insurance is all dealt with by my dad. after asking me to move out, he is threatening me with that! my own money! but things have cooled down a lot, we are starting to make compromises, and they are starting to see that i really am trying to work with them on this. i love them and respect them very much, but they are making it so hard to find myself away from them. so hopefully all of this works out sooner than later. i really dont need my parents to hate me.. not after all that i'm going through as it is
sorry for the novel
i need to get out of here
haven't i been through enough already?