crusty the crustacean
"Here's to all of you PHONY's
all of you sycophantic freeloaders
who smile through you teeth at me
I went to Boston with Scott on Wednesday to go see the Boston Pops and Guster. we got there about 4 hours early, so scott showed me around harvard square. we went to get some tea at a little cafe and it started pouring out so we waited it out for quite sometime. i had fun just sitting there talking, sipping on tea, watching people fail miserably at parallel parking. the Pops were amazing. they played for the first hour and then Guster came on. it totally blew me away, the show was phenomenal, and that's an understatement. Guster got two encores and on the second one their equipment had been turned off and put away. they played 'jesus on the radio' without any microphones or anything so it was kind of hard to hear over all the people screaming and singing, but it was still awesome. i never thought a band like Guster would meld so well with the boston pops. it was incredible.
the party last night was a lot of fun. i had been looking forward to it all week and i showed up in possibly the worst mood a person could bring to a party. i apologize for being such a pooper at first, but i did loosen up after a bit and ended up having SO much fun.. even though my night consisted of babysitting Daysha and Liz, Liz moreso than Daysha. for everyone who helped with that- thank you thank you thank you, i would not have been able to handle that by myself.
so here's some Kendra history- on tuesday i bought my first skirt EVER. that's right, i have never owned my own skirt until now. i even went out and bought another one today! OH-MY-GOD! FREAK OUT! no but seriously.. i'm such a tomboy at heart, and i have never taken an interest in wearing skirts. well it was more along the lines of me being repulsed by skirts and hating even a simple thought of wearing one. im trying to be more girly though, i've done a lot to change my appearance this year. i know this sounds dumb and miniscule, but its actually a HUGE step and a big deal for me.
i'm in the process of becoming someone totally different, and for the most part i like how i'm changing. i like how i'm changing physically and mentally. i like how i jst don't give a shit anymore, i'm totally comfortable with myself. but emotionally i'm having a hard time dealing with things. for some reason i've been over sensitive about a lot of things lately.. and that's to put it mildly. i've been through a lot in the past year, and i think all the trauma is finally surfacing. i cried for the first time about a lot of things that i didnt know i could still cry about. i'm also trying to do a lot of soul searching, i wanna figure out who i am. i know it sounds funny, but if someone were to ask me to tell them about myself.. i wouldn't know what to say except for my hobbies.. truth is, i know nothing about ME. ..weird.. the things you think about when youre alone after a few shots of 151. ha.
i always feel like i've said too much
please leave
this is not a joke
stop smiling
GO"