Tell me where we go from here 13/?
Chapter 13
Dean's way of dealing with his problems had always been to ignore them until they went away. Drowning them in alcohol was another proven method. Talking about them was not. But this was about him and Cas and the thing between them that they finally had allowed to grow and if he didn't solve this problem, if there even was a problem, he was probably risking what he had with Cas. So yeah, they needed to talk about this.
However, over the day Sam was always within earshot and with this insane plan of finding Claire Novak they were all stuck together in the library, searching the internet for a trace of the girl.
In the evening Dean wasn't sure if he should invite Cas over to his room again. He feared Cas would get the impression he didn't want him there if he didn't ask but if he asked, wouldn't Cas feel obliged to have sex with him? Not that Dean minded sex with Cas, quite the opposite, but they should probably talk this out before they did anything in this direction. In the end he didn't say anything but when it was time for bed Cas just followed him to his room as if that was how it was from now on. Dean couldn't help but smile and as soon as the door closed behind them, he brought their lips together for a tender kiss.
Cas kissed him back and his hands slipped under Dean's shirt and for a while Dean let himself believe that there was no problem at all. However, when he slipped his leg between Cas' and brought their hips together with his hands on Cas' butt he didn't feel what he expected. Dean was tenting his own pants quite obviously by now and he didn't try to hide that fact from Cas, the way his erection pressed against his leg Cas had to be stupid to not notice but there was nothing coming from Cas. He kissed Dean quite enthusiastically and his hands were roaming all over Dean's back and grabbing the nape of his neck to draw him close but there was nothing happening in Cas' pants.
Dean rested his head in the crook of Cas' neck, enjoying the trail of kisses the other man left on his exposed neck but he knew that was all he was getting today. He didn't know why Cas wasn't more into it but he could clearly tell that Cas wasn't aroused in the slightest.
When they lay in bed not much later, both wearing t-shirt and underwear, Cas snuggled closer and his hand trailed downwards to Dean's still half-hard cock but Dean stopped him.
"It's okay." He whispered in his ear and hugged him closer. Cas liked that, Dean had learned, hugging and cuddling and snuggling and all the other stuff Dean would have called girly if it hadn't been Cas in his arms.
"I can ..." Cas' voice trailed off.
"We don't have to do anything." Dean said quietly. The way Cas offered to help him out when he clearly wasn't in the mood was unsettling, and Dean wondered what kind of sex he had with the women he had been with before. Cas hadn't come into this a complete virgin, he had experience but Dean got the impression that along the way he had picked up a few strange ideas about it.
This would be a good time to address the problem Dean was seeing here but when he opened his mouth, Cas was quicker.
"Do you think we will find Claire?" Cas asked and the moment to talk about something else was over.
"We will." Dean promised and held him tighter. With that on his mind it wasn't a surprise that Cas wasn't up for sex, Dean got that.
Cas was fine at the moment but eventually his grace would burn out and he knew it. It didn't look that way but he was dying. Claire was the light at the end of the tunnel but maybe it was just the upcoming train. They didn't know if they could find Claire. If they could find her in time. And if they could use her to find the rest of Cas' grace was another question.
Thinking about all that, Dean's arousal died down and he was just glad that Cas was here in his arms and alive.
The next day Sam got a call from an Amy Summers, a woman who knew Bobby and didn't know who else to call.
So they found themselves on their way to Indiana. There was no need to rush and they stopped for the night in a small town Dean didn't even bother to read the name on the welcome sign. There was a motel and a bar'n'grill and that was all he was interested in.
They checked in to the motel and went to their rooms for a quick shower. Cramped up in the car all day wasn't the best way to spend the day and Dean had to admit that he wasn't as young as he used to be anymore. He used to ride in the car for three days without a pause and get out without a problem but now he felt his back and his legs and when he rolled his head it crunched in his neck.
He let Cas have the first shower but reminded him to not use up all the hot water. Knowing dumpholes like this, there wasn't enough hot water for one quick shower and that was the reason he had offered the first one to Cas. Becoming more and more human wasn't easy for the angel and if he could make it a little better with a hot shower, Dean would do it without a second thought. He was just that awesome.
While Cas was in the bathroom Dean unpacked the few things he would need for the night and tried to not think about the angel all wet and naked in the shower.
If this wasn't a tiny motel bathroom with a shower stall not even big enough for one grown man to fit in comfortably, he would have been tempted to slip in with Cas and offer to wash his back. Instead he waited for his turn and took a quick shower himself. At least the cold water that hit him half-way through washing his hair took care of his stubborn hard-on he'd been sporting since Cas had taken off his shirt.
Outside Sam was already waiting for them and then they were on their way to the bar'n'grill Dean had spotted earlier. They had greasy burgers and a few beers and Cas wouldn't play pool if his life depended on it. It was a fun evening and Dean just enjoyed going out with his brother and his angel and he wished this would last forever.
When they made their way back to the motel, they were pleasantly tipsy, not really drunk because they needed to be on the road again early the next morning, but they had enough to laugh louder than they should over jokes that probably weren't funny at all.
Sam came up with the old story of their trip to the beach, the only trip to the beach they had ever made for fun, and how he lost his swimming pants in the water. Dean had teased him the rest of the summer for that.
Cas laughed along but Dean wasn't sure if he really understood what was so funny about it but for now Dean was just happy to have him at his side. All three of them walked shoulder to shoulder with Dean in the middle and he had his arms around the two most important people in his life and in that moment Dean was happy.
"Don't get too loud." Sam warned them with a grin and a pointed finger to what Dean showed him another finger and then he dragged Cas into the room by the collar with the full intention to make enough noise for their neighbors to bang against the walls.
Slightly drunk as he was his coordination had gone to shit and his mouth on Cas' was all sloppy and wet and good.
"Get your shirt off." Dean mumbled into Cas' mouth while he fought with the buttons. Cas laughed into the kiss and helped Dean out of his shirts first. When they were finally naked, they landed in a heap of tangled limbs on the bed. Dean's hand found its way down to Cas' cock and with a few strokes he brought it to full hardness. Good, that was good. Dean had just enough brain left to admire the fact that he could get Cas up and ready with a few strokes but then Cas' hand was on him as well and he lost the ability to think.
Way too quickly he spurted his release all over Cas' hand, damn, he wasn't a horny teenager anymore he should have more self-control by now but on the other hand this was Cas with him in bed and that thought never got old.
However, Cas was still hard.
"Fuck me." Dean mumbled into another kiss and wrapped his legs around the other man. He fit between his legs perfectly and for a moment Dean just enjoyed the friction on his spent cock and Cas' erection against him. "Lube's on the nightstand."
He had put it there earlier just in case and now he was glad that he didn't have to let go of Cas just to get the lube. He would have gone with spit instead.
"I thought ..." Cas propped himself up on both elbows to look Dean in the eye.
"You're thinking too much." Dean cut him off with rutting against him, which coaxed a moan out of Cas. He knew what Cas was thinking but maybe showing him that he could enjoy bottoming would solve their little problem which wasn't a problem at all.
Cas studied him for a moment longer, those intense blue eyes looking directly into his soul and Dean let him. He lay there, bare and open, trusting Cas to not hurt him. Finally Cas nodded and reached for the bottle.
"Tell me if I do something wrong." Cas demanded.
"I will." Dean craned his neck to bring their lips together. In the back of his mind a little voice whispered: Like you tell me if something is wrong?
But then Cas shifted and rolled to his side, leaving Dean stretched out with his cooling come on his stomach and his half-hard cock, but then he was back with lubed fingers and Dean spread his legs a little wider to give him better access.
It had been a while since Dean had done this so he wasn't complaining when Cas took his time to prep him. He even found his prostate and gave it quite some attention. By the time Cas was satisfied with the stretching Dean was hard and leaking again, already fucking himself on Cas' fingers.
"Put it in." Dean said with gritted teeth. He wanted to come with Cas in him, he wanted to feel him but that bastard took his sweet time. "I'm ready, c'mon, do it."
Finally Cas got in position between his legs and Dean slung them around his waist, ankles crossed over the small of Cas' back and drew him in close. Stretched like he was Cas slipped in almost without resistance.
"Fuck." Dean breathed out and screwed his eyes shut. By no means was Cas small and it had been a while since there had been anything near his ass. The stretch and the feeling of full was overwhelming and Dean needed a moment to adjust to it.
"You okay?" Cas had a worried eye on him. He leaned in and gave Dean a reassuring kiss. That movement alone send jolts through Dean's bottom. His mouth fell open and he couldn't help it and rocked against Cas.
"Move."
Cas didn't have to be told twice. He drew back carefully and then thrust back in. He started slow but gained confidence with every thrust and then his hand closed around Dean's cock again, stroking him in the same pace as his thrusts.
"Cas!" Dean duck his heels into Cas' back, taking him as deep as possible. His nails clawed into his shoulder blades and with that Dean came the second time this evening. Through the haze of his own orgasm he felt Cas twitching and spurting inside him.
When Dean drifted of to sleep this time, he had Cas in his arms and a lazy smile on his lips.
Chapter 14
Masterpost